Howdy....you're killing me!

First, I took a rickety bus to get to my destination. When I got there, I had to stay in a haunted hotel with blood dripping from the walls. I was shown to my room, and quickly discovered that it best to maybe not even sit on the vibrating bed, let alone touch whatever was in that cabinet.... The next day, I got stuck in a hurricane and couldn't leave my room. After the storm passed and I could finally go sight seeing...I decided to go scuba diving.....with sharks. I guess it would've been nice to have a heads up that the hurricane pushed up the sharks migration time.... Oh! And I'll be paying for that guys second hip replacement since he'll probably sew me for landing on him....