Menewsha Avatar Community - View Single Post - Meatless - Vegans, Vegetarians, Pescatarians, and the curious

05:49 AM

Welcome Pack
A bit of info for those curious about the lifestyle

A quick overview of the labels. These descriptions are in no way full representations of the lifestyle, and everyone has their own unique spin on how they choose to live. This is merely a basic guideline for those who are curious.

Vegan: Someone who does not consume or use any product that has come from an animal, regardless of whether or not the animal was killed to get the item. In addition to meat, a vegan would not consume dairy, eggs, or use animal products such as feathers.
Vegetarian: Someone who does not eat meat. Some vegetarians are okay with other products that come from deceased animals, such as broths or fur, while others will use nothing that an animal has died for. Some consume products such as dairy and eggs, others do not.
Pescatarian: Someone who does not eat meat but does eat fish. For some, this extends to other seafood such as shrimp or crabs. Whether they will eat other land-based animal products that are not meat (such as dairy or broths) varies.

What Not to Say
To a Vegan/Vegetarian/Pescatarian

In this thread, I would like you to feel free to ask whatever questions you may have. However, people who lead these lifestyles tend to hear the same things a lot, and it gets very tiring. These things are usually said right after we say "I'm vegan/vegetarian/pescatarian." Should you meet someone somewhere else who tells you they lead a meatless life, try to avoid saying these things. I've included a description of why these statements are problematic.

"Oh, I could never do that!"
Usually said right after "Sorry, I'm a [vegan/vegetarian/pescatarian]." The reason this is annoying is that it's very defensive. No one has asked you to be meatless, calm down. This is not an overly offensive reply, but it's probably the #1 thing meatless folk hear. We really don't like that everyone gets super defensive after we share something about our lifestyles! We're just letting you know that we can't eat meat, we're not attacking you. "I'm religious." "Oh, I could never do that!" See how weird it is now?

"I knew a [vegan/vegetarian/pescatarian] who..."
This story usually goes on to describe a very militant or judgmental meatless person who was rude. We're sorry you had such a negative experience, but what you're telling us by sharing this story right after we tell you about our lifestyle is actually "I met someone mean once, and since you share a characteristic with them, I'm immediately assuming that you're going to be like them to. If you're not, you personally must atone for the way they hurt my feelings." Stop. That has nothing to do with us. If you're a man with brown hair, well, I've met men with brown hair before that were jerks! But that's got nothing to do with you and I'm not going to bring it up when you start talking about your hair.

"How do you get protein/iron?"
Let me address the question first directly and tell you that meat is not the only thing with iron and protein in it. Now let me address why this question is so annoying. Unless we adopted this meatless lifestyle yesterday, it's safe to assume we've been doing this for a while. We know how to take care of ourselves. Maybe that means taking a supplement, or maybe it means eating a lot of eggs and leafy greens. Unless you've observed our eating habits regularly and really have cause for concern, just assume we're alright, okay? Think of it this way: a lot of (meat-eating) people don't get all the vitamins and nutrients they need. How often do you ask them if they're getting enough vitamin C/fiber/folic acid? You probably don't. You probably assume they've got that under control or at least that it's their own business. Please afford us the same treatment.

"You'll grow out of it."
Do I even need to explain how patronizing and rude this one is? If you don't get it, take some aspect of your own lifestyle and stick it in there instead. Maybe it's your religion, your passion, your morals. Now pretend someone is telling you that you'll "grow out of it." Ouch, right? People change their minds about all sorts of things, it's part of growing as a person and exploring who you are. Just because you have known people who adopted a meatless lifestyle to later give it up does not mean that it will be so for other people. Lots of folk adopt a meatless life and continue it on until the day they die.

"But humans were made to eat meat!"
Yes, we were! And it was so crucial to our survival as a species, we're very glad that we have that survival trait! But nowadays we don't need to eat meat to survive. It's not a matter of going out and killing a sabre tooth vs. starving. We can get all the food and nutrients we need through other means now without having to kill any living animals. Hooray for agriculture!

"But plants are alive!"
Plants don't think. Plants don't feel emotions. Plants don't remember. Plants don't feel pain. Plants don't have personalities. Plants have no consciousness. Don't be a smartass.

"I bet that thing you're eating right now has some animal product in it!"
This one is just mean. What you are saying is "I don't think you're competent enough to lead the lifestyle you claim to lead, silly person. You're destined to fail, and I think that's funny." This also goes along with the sudden quizzing. "Did you know that [common product] is made from cow hide? And [other common product] is made from cows' fur?" Again, that is assuming we don't know these things already and that we're destined for failure. What's worse is that it's often said with a sadistic tone, like you want us to unknowingly use/consume a product we are morally opposed to. Why would you want that?

So what do you say to a meatless person? Anything you'd say to anyone else! We don't want to be treated like we're different. We're just people like you. Maybe you don't eat cake, but no one acts differently around you for it, right?

If you're cooking a meal that a meatless person will be eating, one good thing you can say is "is this okay for you to eat?" Eating meals prepared by meat-eating people is a minefield for us. Even if you don't put meat into the dish, there are a lot of animals products sneakily hidden in all sorts of pre-packaged stuff that you might not even be aware of. Just a few weeks ago I had a pastaroni dish at my boyfriend's house. Nowhere on the front of the box did it say it was meat-flavored. Just "herb and butter pasta" or something to that effect. Later I found out that one of the ingredients listed on the box was chicken broth. D'oh! If you really want to make sure a meatless person is comfortable eating your dishes, save the packages the ingredients came in and let them give a quick scan of the ingredients list. It's also good to check how they feel about dairy products and the like, if you don't already know. Trust me, we really appreciate it! You would do the same for someone with a food allergy.