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Febreze
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Febreze is offline
 
#145
Old 12-21-2008, 11:11 PM

((Nope, bathrooms are in the hallways. I have reasons for that decision. :P But there are two bathrooms in the bedroom hallway.

I misinterpreted her as running off to throw up, since that was what you said she was about to do - twice. And since throwing up just because you almost had one sip of alcohol, which will not have any effect whatsoever on a baby in such a tiny amount and your character is pregnant and should know that, her reaction only made sense if she had some other reason to throw up. Aiko assumed the most obvious one, or at least the one that would be most obvious to Aiko because that's the sort of person she is/spends time with.

Since I did misinterpret the part of her actually throwing up, ignore my last post and I'll rewrite it, and her not drinking the alcohol makes sense but her reaction was a bit too extreme for you to expect people to not try and figure out why. It's fine to have her freak out like that but you can't expect other characters to not guess that your character has a secret if you're going to make it the center of attention like that.

But I do appreciate the opportunity to rewrite it because I was actually writing Aiko a bit out of character in order to try and follow you out of the room. I haven't been making Aiko quite shallow enough.

ALSO! Calling out to everyone else, we need more active posters here! D: ))



Aiko blinked as the girl shook her head and ran off. "That's so gross," she muttered in annoyance, glancing along the bar until she found a napkin holder. She pulled a couple off, throwing them onto the ground on top of the spat-out drink and stepping on them to press them into the carpet.