09-28-2012, 07:08 AM
Oooh, I like it! Sounds like Lee's used to dealing with his new companion.
For the next piece: I couldn't think of another word for redhead. 'Ginger' felt too 'modern' and it rubs me the wrong way since I've mostly heard/read the word when used in a joking or insulting manner. Even if it's an acceptable description, it has a personally negative connotation. A pity, since I originally intended the girl to be a redhead. And if I got the other hair colour's synonyms wrong, it's because I'm evidently not familiar with describing hair.
------
The girl tucked a strand of straw-coloured hair behind her ear, her expression too solemn to match her age. A doll with dark hair was her only companion in the long, lonely bus ride. She regretted running away. She regretted many things.
She murmured, “Your turn, please?”
-
“Last stop!”
The bus driver peered at the mirror to watch his sole passenger leave. The girl stood up and skipped to the exit. “Goodbye~” she giggled, stuffing a flaxen ragdoll into her bag. As the doors closed behind the brunette, the driver felt his blood run cold.
Wasn’t she blonde before?
Last edited by Kiba_Ryuun; 09-28-2012 at 09:34 AM..
Reason: Spelling/grammar edits
|