My ex who was bossy ,controlling,cheated on me with his ex more than once,then dumped me the day after valentines day on msn cam and posted about 50 bulletins on myspace telling people that I was never his ex and that I was a liar is engaged to the woman he's been dating for 3 years. I was the doting loving gf who kept giving him second,third and 70th chances only to have him tell people at work and our online buddies that I was never his gf.
I haven't had a bf in over 2 years and this guy gets a fiance? WTF that's not fair :(
I'm kinda down about how the lying cheating sob has someone and I have no one T_T
anyone else thinks that's unfair? o.o

Nope, do you know why? Because either he will do the same to her eventualy and she'll leave him too, OR she's just as bad and she would have been made for him. Having someone, and having someone amazingly right for you are different things. He sounds like a dbag anyway to be honest.

Sadly, it's gonna upset you anway, I mean, it's natural for everyone to get upset about things that their ex did after you. Even if you hate them now, it's one of the stupid facts of life :(

You'll have your day, and find someone who treats you better and is proud to shout to the world "THAT'S MY GIRLFRIEND!" Instead of lying about it :3

Hey, it could be worse... you could be the one engaged to that jerk.

Midian is totally right; it isn't just about having someone, it's about having someone wonderful, who loves and respects you just as much as you respect them, who won't need a 70th chance because he can learn from his mistakes and cares about you enough not to hurt you.
Having no one is better than having someone that's no good for you.

I hope for his fiance's sake he's changed, but be glad you're not the poor girl taking that risk.

Originally Posted by Cherish

Hey, it could be worse... you could be the one engaged to that jerk.

Agreed.

If he's as bad as you say he is, then I feel sorry for his fiance. You've had a lucky escape. Be happy for that :)
Just because someone's engaged, doesn't mean their life's sorted and they're happy.
I don't keep track of my ex's. I tend to cut out all contact with them after we're over, so I wouldn't know what they're up to, or if they're even alive still o_0

Personally, I'd say... he was your ex years ago. Why is it even your business what he's doing now?

It's very difficult to make love happen. If you try to force it, it's likely you'll never be happy with what you get. Just relax and go with the flow. That's how I found my fiance.

Originally Posted by Keyori

Personally, I'd say... he was your ex years ago. Why is it even your business what he's doing now?

You probebly didn't mean it but I find this to be very sharp and a bit bitchy ^^; mayhaps a reword?

I have to say I agree with Keyori. You broke up years ago, you should be over it by now. It doesn't sound like you guys kept in touch so why bother keeping tabs on him? That doesn't sound like very healthy behavior. Who cares about what he's doing? He's not a part of your life anymore and there's nothing you can do. I don't see a point in letting it bother you so much. So he's "engaged" to some girl, that has nothing to do with you. You don't know what their relationship is like. Maybe she was the piece he was missing to get his act together or maybe he's still the same dickwad he was when you two were together. Either way, it's none of your concern so let it go.

Instead of making yourself miserable, you should be glad you're not with him anymore after the horrible way that he treated you. You've been single for two years, again, so what? I was single for three years before I got together with my current beau and we're long distance.

Single life is pretty good but if you're so worried about getting someone in your life then just go out and meet people. Like writing? Join a local writers group. Meet friends of your friends. Go to parties, bars, concerts, museums, a walk in the park, etc. You meet people all the time, eventually you'll click with one and really hit it off. It's math, bro.

Just take it easy and enjoy yourself. Don't let stupid shit and/or people get you down.

Single life is pretty good but if you're so worried about getting someone in your life then just go out and meet people.

Ride solo (It's fun, not having anyone to hover over you and just mingling with other people)for a while, then meet someone you're really attracted to and you'll probably hit it off. :)
~Riding solo~ Jason Derulo

Originally Posted by Midian

You probebly didn't mean it but I find this to be very sharp and a bit bitchy ^^; mayhaps a reword?

Hmm, you're probably right. I have a hard time writing what I mean, since there's no tone of voice to help convey what I'm trying to express. I'll try again.

"You guys broke up years ago. Why are you worried about it? You went your separate ways and you're clearly better off without him. You'll only upset yourself by keeping tabs on him. It's his life and he'll do what he wants, and what he does now should be inconsequential to you. Likewise, this is now YOUR life without him, and it's not any of his business what you do, so don't let his actions affect you."

Better? :sweat:

My "ex" just got married, I saw it on his Facebook (we are friends on there, I don't stalk him or anything). But we split up 8 years ago so I feel no different about him getting married than I do about another else that I know doing the same.

I have to agree with everyone else that your reaction to his engagement doesn't seem that healthy. Though you do seem to be tying his engagement up with possibly excessive self pity for yourself. Do you need to be with someone?

I'm probably the least tactful person out there so I'll just come out and say this.
Some women can't seem to function if they're single, they seem to have to validate their existence by having a partner, even (and this horrifies me!) if it's someone that they don't especially care about or who abuses them, they'd just rather be with someone, anyone, than be single. Are you one of these people?

I've been single for the past 4 years nearly, and that's entirely from choice, it's my prefered way to be. I don't need another half to make me a whole person, I enjoy being able to do what I want when I want, and not have to share my time with someone who's going to make demands on my life. But then I'm selfish, someone will seriously have to sweep me of my feet before I'll let anyone else make any demands on my personal space/time.

I agree with what Jelly said. I'm more independent and do not need anyone to make me happy. I think that the first thing that, someone needs to do is make themselves happy before they think about being in a relationship. Also, if you are having problems letting him go, therapy may help or even just having someone to talk to. Meeting new people is always a plus too. I used to be really anti-social and not talk to anyone then I learned that people are NOT going to bite your head off for starting conversations with them. Striking up a conversation with a stranger can be one of the most interesting thing,, plus you may make a new friend. I've made a ton of friends by talking to people at concerts, bars, clubs, wherever.

The more progressive thing to do these days is to go it alone. And frankly, if he's going to treat you like that, you don't need him in the first place.
You can do far better than that, but sometimes it really is best to go solo for a while.
Yes, dear, it hurts like HELL when they move on before you. But you really REALLY are lucky in this situation. It's hard to see it now, but it's definitely a good thing.

It is fair. My cheating exfiance was married the same year we broke off the engagement to one of the many women he cheated on me with. I was just like you, the doting girlfriend that tried to give him everything. When I left him, I knew he'd get karma. Three months later he got her pregnant and married her, then four months later she cheated on him and took the baby and left. Now he's got another girl pregnant and I guarantee it'll be a lather, rinse, and repeat situation.

I haven't been in a serious relationship since him, but... I've had fun being single and I know exactly what I want now. You need to stop focusing on a jerkhole and focus on yourself. That's was being single means, time to appreciate yourself so you don't date loser like that ever again.

If you can't be an island of one, you'll never truly know what it's like to have someone. Trust me, I'm sure that chick he's engaged to is apart of a cold dish of cruel karma.

One of my exs isn't getting married...yet. But he recently got a new girlfriend, and well. We almost got engaged (we were talking about it, and then some shit happened and we broke up). So honestly, it's still a sore spot...But I also know it's not my business anymore what she chooses to do, so I'm trying to be supportive, even if it makes me want to smash my head into a wall. :lol:
that said, I do love my current bf, it's just..not quite as intense as my love was for my ex. We dated a long time, with a lot building up to it, and it was passionate and important. And now it's nothing.

I think it's normal to be a little jealous over recent exs, especially if he's lying like that about you. He's probably just saying it so that this woman will marry him...If he really was dating her three years ago, he probably was cheating on you..or her (I view the person being cheated on as the one who came first), and with him telling people that they were dating 3 years ago, some people who may recall you two dating, won't believe him or accuse him of lying...But if your relationship "never really happened" then he's not a cheater, or a liar...You know (at least that's probably what he's thinking)?