Hello Menewsha, long time no see! I'm busy with work so I don't have time to get on these days, but I have an interesting topic for you all. If it's not appropriate for any place on this site, do take it down. For I do not have time to come back to this quickly. And if it is appropriate, commentators do keep your answers tasteful. You're all pretty good at that so I don't have much worries about that.

Swinging; not at the playground, though you might meet there randomly for a first time hello. I don't know when it started but swinging between couples has been around for a while. Same room, separate, switching partners for a weekend, orgys, etcetera. I participated in it for a little bit, but I'd rather just have my fiancee now.

My main question to all of you: would you swing? Why or why not? What problems have you had with swinging? What benefits? How do you swing? Add in your own questions to expand the discussion if you wish. I'll check in with this later on.

I would not swing. Much too jealous to do that sort of thing. I have no problems with it at all. What people do in their bedrooms is none of my business, but I couldn't do it. I suppose benefits would be that the swingers are more comfortable with their sexuality and their partner. They've established a trust many don't have.

Some friends of mine swing. They're an older couple though. I'm eighteen...I'd say they're mid thirties? I'm not entirely sure, but I know they do. But they're entirely comfortable with sexual things. I've gone to the female of the couple several times for sexual advice, since she's into many kinks and that sort of thing.

Anyway, to sum up. I don't have a problem with it, but I don't feel comfortable doing it myself.

I am much too young to be married, so obviously I don't swing, but could I do it? Yea, I probably could. It would depend on the kind of relationship my marriage was and how jealous I might get ect, but it sounds like it could be a fun experience. Currently I'm single, which is not to say I'm celibate, and I'm enjoying the freedom of being able to have multiple partners. It's not all sunshine and roses, certainly, but it's working for me right now.

It's not for me, I have to have romantic feelings for someone before I have sex with them and I tend to only want the partner I'm with. There are also moral issues, I'd feel like I was committing adultery. So no I couldn't do it.

I agree with above. I could never do it as I also don't get intimate with people until I know them well. Don't care what other people do though.

I'm not interested.
But, I don't care if people do it with each other. They're adults and they can do whatever they want.
It's just not for me. xD;

I used to work for a company where the owners were married and were swingers. The problem I had with it was that everyone knew about it, and they tried to take their employees home with them.:P I wouldn't have had a problem if they kept it at home....They had kids too, which makes me think it would be weird if they saw their parents taking home random strangers.

It's never interested me because I am very much a one-person person and could not be with anyone who wasn't the same way. I couldn't care less if others did those sorts of things, though; as long as they didn't try to get me or my partner involved, it wouldn't affect me at all. XP

Originally Posted by JapaneseCherryBlossom

I used to work for a company where the owners were married and were swingers. The problem I had with it was that everyone knew about it, and they tried to take their employees home with them.:P I wouldn't have had a problem if they kept it at home....They had kids too, which makes me think it would be weird if they saw their parents taking home random strangers.

Okay, personally, I find that completely inappropriate and disgusting.
It's one thing to do it on your time, if you were out at a bar or something, it's another thing to pester your employees about it.

I hope that most if not all, swingers are mindful of their kids, but I don't know any swingers personally, especially not any with kids, so I wouldn't know. :(

I don't have a problem with swingers or what they do, but it's just not for me. I'd have to get to know, love, and have a serious relationship with the person before I could do anything further then that.

I'm not someone who really likes sex as opposed to love and intimacy, so it's not something I would ever want to do. Not sure that I'd want my partner to do it either, but it's not something that I wouldn't consider, especially because I would never be able to keep up with someone with a particularly active sex drive.

I don't believe that it's right or wrong, just the same as most other feelings, especially regarding love.

Originally Posted by monstahh`

Okay, personally, I find that completely inappropriate and disgusting.
It's one thing to do it on your time, if you were out at a bar or something, it's another thing to pester your employees about it.

I hope that most if not all, swingers are mindful of their kids, but I don't know any swingers personally, especially not any with kids, so I wouldn't know. :(

I do! :lol: My friends Jesse and Jan have four kids living with them. One around my age, I think sixteen or so. The twin boys are around thirteen, fourteen? Then there's the youngest, I think he's eight or so.

The kids know about their parents lifestyle, and are totally supportive of them. And the parents don't go around screwing their partners all over the house in front of them. They usually wait until they're all gone to a friends/school/etc. And they won't even talk about it around the youngest one.

Though they have an...unorthodox..household. Not in a bad way, I guess. The parents are tattooed and drink often, sometimes do pot. Their daughter does as well. Heck, their daughter is going to finish my tattoo :lol: So the kids grew up knowing that normal things to them, may be abnormal by others' standards.

So I'd have to say the swingers to take the lifestyle seriously know when and where it is appropriate. Just like anyone else with certain kinks.

Originally Posted by ll P W E E P ll

Though they have an...unorthodox..household. Not in a bad way, I guess. The parents are tattooed and drink often, sometimes do pot. Their daughter does as well. Heck, their daughter is going to finish my tattoo :lol: So the kids grew up knowing that normal things to them, may be abnormal by others' standards.

I don't think it's a problem with what the parents do. And I don't think tattoos are out of the ordinary. Yet I wouldn't want my kids to get in trouble with the law for drinking underage and smoking pot. At least, here it's not legal...I only say this because I used to think my friend's parents were awesome for letting us drink/smoke at a young age. Well when this friend was older, she sold some pot to someone SHE thought was her friend, and they turned her in. Jail and many years of probation:P
Anyways, back to swinging lol. I can't really say if swinging is completely bad or is ok. But the risk of sexual disease increases with the amount of partners, even if there is protection. And jealousy is a bitch too. I guess I just haven't seen any good relationships that are swinging ones yet.

I've been in an open relationship before, but we were only casually dating and didn't swing. I think I could do the swinging thing with the right person, depending on our relationship. I couldn't do polyamory due to jealousy I don't think, but if it was "just" having sex, then I probably could.

Swinging, no. Polygamy, yes. I have dated people while I was married and I did have a girlfriend living with my husband and I for a bit because I trusted and loved her. She was not shared with him. She was just my girlfriend. Swinging is just not something for me. I actually have to be emotionally involved with someone before I do anything with them. I do not condone swinging at all since for some people it does work while with others it does not.

Originally Posted by ll P W E E P ll

I do! :lol: My friends Jesse and Jan have four kids living with them. One around my age, I think sixteen or so. The twin boys are around thirteen, fourteen? Then there's the youngest, I think he's eight or so.

The kids know about their parents lifestyle, and are totally supportive of them. And the parents don't go around screwing their partners all over the house in front of them. They usually wait until they're all gone to a friends/school/etc. And they won't even talk about it around the youngest one.

Though they have an...unorthodox..household. Not in a bad way, I guess. The parents are tattooed and drink often, sometimes do pot. Their daughter does as well. Heck, their daughter is going to finish my tattoo :lol: So the kids grew up knowing that normal things to them, may be abnormal by others' standards.

So I'd have to say the swingers to take the lifestyle seriously know when and where it is appropriate. Just like anyone else with certain kinks.

Jesse and Jan are a perfect example of how you handle an alternate lifestyle. What people don't seem to get about raising kids is that if you EXPLAIN things to them, they aren't weirded out by it and probably make better choices about everything in the end because of it. It's only when you treat a subject with "weirdness" that it becomes an eventual problem.

I wouldn’t swing simply because I don’t have a reason to. I don’t and haven’t ever had problems with people who swing as long as both people in the couple agree. Although I don’t really have a problem with swinging… I don’t really understand why a couple would swing? And if they have kids it’s fine as long as they’re careful and place the children first. I think explaining it would work out well as long as you explain it in the right way

Hm... would I swing? It doesn't interest me right now but I'm not against it. Far from it. I hold a "if it's right for you and involves only the consensual then go for it" stance with most things. There is a chance swinging will interest me later on. I am polyamorous... it's more about the emotional side of the relationship for me though. I suppose I would say I don't understand myself sexually enough to know for sure. If I stay with my boyfriend (which I do intend to do) I most likely will never try swinging since I know he wouldn't be comfortable with it (I would only argue/debate it if I meant /a lot/ to me). We've discussed it.

I perfer not to share. And first off its awkward to me. Not interested at all. I see it as cheating and no no no I can't see my hubby and I doing that. Its just ahhhhhhh okay I don't have the exact words to explain why its just wRong sorry :(

Originally Posted by BlackEggIceBird

I perfer not to share. And first off its awkward to me. Not interested at all. I see it as cheating and no no no I can't see my hubby and I doing that. Its just ahhhhhhh okay I don't have the exact words to explain why its just wRong sorry :(

It's not wrong. It's an alternative lifestyle. There's nothing wrong with that. I don't like sour cream, but it's not wrong for other people to eat it.

No. It maybe due to the fact that the self confessed swingers I have known tend to be middle aged pervy old men which I wouldn't touch with a biohazard suit and a ten foot pole. It's definitely not for me, but hey ho each to their own.
I don't like the idea of parents letting their kids know of their swinger lifestyle. If my parents told me that when me and my sister go out our home turns into some love grotto I would personally die. I would literally gouge my eyes out with hot needles. I don't want to know about my parents love life, as far as I am concerned I was brought to this world by a stalk.

Not my cuppa. I don't mind exhibtionist situations, but I always wondered about couples who needed other people to feel happy. That just sounds to me like their relationship ain't that great. And if that's so, why not just break up?

I ranted up in one of the religion vs. homosexuality threads my two cents on how I think sex effects ones spirituality; the tl;dr factor is high, so here's the Cliffies: I think empty sex ain't good for the psyche.

To me swinging all but defines empty sex, so I'm not into it. But I also know people have to learn stuff for themselves, so I'd never diss someone for trying it.