Yan.

Today I looked through some pictures to find what kind of pet I wanted. Figures that I ended up being drawn to something like . . . this. At one point I would have called myself a freak for enjoying this so much.

That was a while back.

Now I'm actually considering adoption! I will document everything that happens with the little guy; he's too cute to have any days missed!

I have here the list of things that are said to keep a Yan happy:

What Yan likes:
Girls (bewbs in particular)
Panties
Food *
More food*
Grocery shopping
Video games where you get to kill people
Playing in water
Animals - big doggehs especially
He wants a dinosaur
Going to the mall
Keeping cool (but NOT being cold)
Yan dun like to walk - so any alternate way of getting somewhere is good.
Being a ninja
Spinny chairs
Loud, flowery shorts
Cooking
Drawing
Coffee
Manga
Sleeping
Yan's on an eternal quest for his FREE - can you find it with him?

Contents:

- Day 1: August 5th (Includes pictures: "Yan Meets Dog" and "Yan Does Shabbat")
- Day 3: The Weekend is Over (Includes pictures: "Great Poems" and "Television for Yan")
- Day 4: Work and Play (Includes pictures: "Spinny Chair Fun," "Ninjas are EVERYWHERE, DARN IT!" and "Whatcha Drawin'?")
- Day 5: Fun Takes on a New Meaning (Includes pictures: "Dino the Smelly Dinosaur," "Mad Yan!" and "Yan's Dino-Ninja")
- Day 6: Too Many Things to Do! (Includes pictures: "The Third Cup," "Yan Looks to Cook," "Yan is Surprised," "Checking for Ice Cream . . . and Being Disappointed," "Yan Dumps Water on Me," "ZOMBIE TIME!" "More Games for Yan," "Too Cool for Being Hot," "Transportation to the Store," "Transportation to the Door," "Expert Guitar Player," "Sheer Panic." and "Bewbs for Yan")

Day 1 August 5th

A little Yan came home with me today. I can't say it was a very . . . ah, pleasant drive. It was more like a flying-french-fries and burning-hot-leather-seats kind of day. In short: it was worse than trying to pry super glue off of my fingertips.

Granted! We finally got home. I wanted to share some food with the little guy because he was looking a bit . . . pale. Come to find out he doesn't like pizza (I'm totally lying. He tried to eat my hand). Or water (which he ended up trying to swim in instead of drink). It ended up being a big mess with him just sitting there like nothing was wrong! I was a bit angry . . . but then I saw the look on his little face and couldn't help but forget what happened.

After the pizza and water stuff, I found that he was going to get a bit dirty if he wasn't careful. So I lovingly sealed him in a frame: it isn't air-tight, like laminating, and it isn't as free as being left out to blow around in the wind from my fan. He's sitting on my desk right now. The Yan is watching me work . . . and I think he's staring at me. From what I can see, he wants to do something more interesting. I've apologized for not doing anything interesting on his first day in my room, but there just isn't anything to do. I have to work, anyway.
By the time the adoption trial is over the little guy will know a ton about advertising and real estate, I'm sure.

So . . . I was cooking dinner with my family when I heard something. Upon turning around there was an . . . interesting sight to behold. My little Yan was hanging out with my dogs!! I was a bit freaked out at first: I thought my dog would eat him. Upon rushing over to help, I found that the Yan was just getting snuffled and snuggled a bit. No harm in that, right?

"Yan Meets Dog"

He was a bit teary-eyed when I finally pulled him away from my dog . . . so I took him to my room and let him cuddle with my stuffed animals instead. -_-' Figures. It worked . . . for a few minutes. Yan was very excitable after that long ride in the car, you see. I found fuzz and pieces of ripped tissue (from the box on my desk) all over my room after I came back from relieving myself.

After that, I went to eat dinner. We were having a special dinner that we have weekly. Sabbath: the night where we don't have to work until the next evening. Below is a picture of Yan being enthusiastic about our candles and cup for wine.

"Yan Does Shabbat"

Day 3 The Weekend is Over

Well, it was a restful weekend! Or, mostly, anyhow. It started out on Satuday with my little Yan asking me to read him a story. I told him to pick a book from the shelf (which I had to hold him up to for a good ten minutes in order to read all the titles). What he chose surprised me: I never would have thought him a poetry kind of guy.

"Great Poems"

I read about half a poem when I noticed that he was getting restless. Perhaps it was the snoring, or perhaps the funny noises he was making every time I said a word with an "n" in it that cued me off that he was bored. Yan looked really excited when I said we could watch a family movie. He got to hold the controller (though I found greasy pizza smears on it when I got it back) while we watched Avatar! (I closed his eyes on the kissy parts - they were unnecessary for his little mind to fathom)

"Television for Yan"

Bed time was the worst part of the evening. He wouldn't stop blowing raspberries! No matter how many times I told him to be quiet, he just wouldn't listen! I pulled the discipline card: a good parent must be strict in order to teach their child how to function in the real world (though, I must admit it's rather difficult to stay mad!).
I gave him a little pat on the butt to get him back into bed (which ended up being on my pillow, silly little guy!) before getting him a glass of water and praying for his sweet dreams. He is awfully darned cute when he sleeps!!

Day 4 Work and Play

As usual, I had to work today. As I sat there typing at my computer I noticed something that caught my attention. Yan was doing a little dance! Or, I thought it was a dance. He ended up explaining (in that hand-motion, squeaky kind of way) that he was mimicking my spinny chair. I laughed, patted him on the head, and let him sit in my lap. Anyone who has ever had a child knows that seating a kid in your lap while trying to concentrate on something important never works. He ended up smacking my [sdfkl;ajfdiu/ keyboard multiple 'adsaf% times. Like he's doing now!!
Anyhow, I ended up making him sit still by telling him we'd spin around a few times. Yan was completely still - I almost forgot he was there (except for the constant feel of the picture frame cutting off blood flow to my toes)! When we finally got to go for a spin, he wanted me to take a picture (because he'd just gotten into my jewelry stash and found some feathers that he loved watching flow through the air as he spun. He now has them with him almost constantly . . . I find it quite charming). How could I refuse?

"Spinny Chair Fun"

After getting so dizzy that he lost his breakfast (which was french toast and chili, by the way) all over my shirt (somehow it got through or around the picture frame), I decided it was time to change. I chose my favorite "around-the-house" t-shirt: it has ninjas on it. Yan was enthused. He bounced around until I agreed to take a picture of him playing with the ninjas on my pillow.

"Ninjas are EVERYWHERE, DARN IT!"

They were . . . happy, I suppose. Yan snuck around and made "sneaking" noises for the next ten minutes while I laughed and started to draw.
Figures that, when I started to sketch, he rushed over and asked what I was doing. He sat there and just stared at me while I tried to remember how to move my hand again (you see, I hate it when people watch me. I get all nervous!).

"Whatcha Drawin'?"

Day 5 Fun Takes on a New Meaning

Today started out excellent. Yan and I got to eat a TON of Rice Crispy Treats before heading off to my room for some playtime. I didn't want him interrupting my Father's meeting, so I just brought little Yan with me.
We started out with cleaning my room. He was desperately bored, so I let him play with my socks (odd, but it was entertaining!). I made a puppet out of one of them, and then Yan mentioned that it looked like a dinosaur. I turned that stray sock into a new toy for the little guy! (I poked my finger with a safety pin while doing so, but it was worth it!)

"Dino the Smelly Dinosaur"

Yan and I played with the dinosaur puppet until Yan suggested we play dress-up. It was an odd game to play, but I said it would be fun. I pulled out my cloaks (yes, I'm a huge fantasy fan) while looking for something for Yan. The perfect idea came to mind: my Mad Hatter hat that I'd worn for Purim (which is a celebration in the Springtime for Jews who like to dress up). I showed Yan the hat and he just wouldn't settle down!! He loved it!!

"Mad Yan!"

So we ran around in cloaks and hats with our new dinosaur friend for a while before Yan passed out. He took a nap (he was coming down off of his sugar rush from the Rice Crispies, you see) on my pillow while I went to draw again. Since I've learned of his recent ninja and dinosaur obsession, I wanted to surprise the little guy. He was very excited to see what I'd drawn for him when he woke up!

"Yan's Dino-Ninja"

Day 6 Too Many Things to Do!

Today started out with the usual routine (that Yan has recently expressed his interest in): coffee. Yan drank at least two cups before I found out he used all the creamer. I was a little disappointed . . . but I got over it eventually.

"The Third Cup"

While we were both still high on the caffeine Yan suggested making breakfast. Together we scanned through the cook book . . . and found nothing that my limited skill could help make. I fail at cooking bacon, let alone french toast!

"Yan Looks to Cook"

Near the end of the cookbook I found a recipe that I thought looked really yummy . . . and Yan was very enthused when I said we could make cake. After all, my sister made it all the time. It couldn't be that hard, could it? Together we mixed the . . . well, the box of cake mix with the eggs and water. Yan was a bit giddy to lick the bowl of excess batter, so I helped him finish off the spoon while the cake cooked.
After the cake was done, I surprised Yan: chocolate frosting! He loves chocolate, so I found. He deserved it: he'd done the most work (and made the most mess) while we made the cake.

"Yan is Surprised"

I found out that chocolate cake is good, but a bit too sweet without ice cream. Yan vehemently agreed . . . and jumped over to check the freezer for any spare sweets. It was so sad to see his little face when we found out there was no ice cream left! My family must have eaten it all a few nights ago. . . .

"Checking for Ice Cream . . . and Being Disappointed"

So, sad and a bit depressed, we both went about cleaning up the kitchen. I had Yan sit down and finish of the last piece of cake (since he did more work on the thing anyway) while I was doing the dishes . . . and I was startled! Yan dumped a water bottle on me.
The fight began. Water was everywhere! My family wasn't very happy to find a soaking Yan and daughter when they came home.

"Yan Dumps Water on Me"

Finally we chose to go and dry off by playing a few video games. Apparently Yan gets really excited about shooting and killing people! I was worried at first . . . but he ended up being a great player! I was glad to finally have someone who would shoot zombies with me!

"ZOMBIE TIME!"

After we got tired of screaming at the scary zombies, I let Yan choose a game. He seems the type for total destruction, really. He chose "Assassin's Creed," which I have never actually finished playing on my own. Yan was a skilled player once again!

"More Games for Yan"

It was a while before we both decided we should do something else. It was getting awfully hot in the house, so I told Yan we should keep cool - which he was (once again) enthused about. He really is an "all or nothing" kind of kid when it comes to emotions! Yan wanted me to place ice cubes near him so he could feel their lovely coolness. (I didn't tell him they were fake, but he seemed to be pretty happy with it anyway.)

"Too Cool for Being Hot"

After cooling off for a little while I told Yan that we were going "bye-bye" for a little bit. He got to come with me - in a walking-free contraption called a bag. He really enjoyed swinging around while I walked through the grocery store. I think he might have left me a few "presents" in there, too. . . .

"Transportation to the Store"


"Transportation to the Door"
"

Of course, the instant we got home Yan wanted to do something fun. I told him we had "Rock Band" . . . and he just grinned like a clown! His pale face lit up with joy . . . I couldn't say he wasn't allowed to play, so I gave him my guitar and let him have at it. (Somehow he made it to the EXPERT difficulty. . . .)

"Expert Guitar Player"

Hours later, after a dinner of leftover chocolate cake and tacos, I got Yan ready for bed. We were both ready, so I read him a book about dragons before sending him to sleep. It was an excellent read, and I agreed to let Yan wear his ninja costume for a few minutes before bed.
This was a grave mistake.
I almost lost him! I was so scared! He ran away from me while I was reading and jumped off the bed!

"Sheer Panic."

When I found him again (he was busy being a ninja, he told me) we both went to bed (he took my pillow again). After that nerve-wracking experience I was out like a light!

Man, what a week it's been. Enjoyable, but scary. Fun . . . but messy. If Yan is allowed to stay, I know we will grow to be better friends . . . and I will learn to be an even better parent.

"Bewbs for Yan"

YAN SUCCESSFULLY ADOPTED!!

*does a little dance* YAN CAN STAY!!! *purrs and brings Yan into a little dance* :boogie: