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Blacksheep poet
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#1
Old 01-12-2008, 07:34 PM

This is just a story Idea and I would want to know if people would even think about reading a manga after hearing this...

The main story line is about young Lucifer who one day is met up with Crow, a shinigami recruiter who is looking for the next mortal to become a shinigami so they can balance the world population. After Lucifer signs his name in blood he realizes the guilt of a shinigami as he kills each and everyone of his victims. He then meets the young Lucin, another shinigami, who his heart is in forbidden love with, as she is changing to something that will create the end for Lucifer.

After hearing that would you even be slightly interested in reading my action romance manga Shinigami Tale's? I know the preview wasn't exactly the best but I'll change it later after I work on my story more!

Temmon
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#2
Old 01-12-2008, 08:58 PM

The Literature Spot forum is meant for written stories. If you need help with your stories, please go to Writing Discussion/Story Help. This thread will be moved there now.

Silverah
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#3
Old 01-12-2008, 10:17 PM

Not really. :?

I'm sorry, it just seems like you're taking the most popular genres and plotlines and combining them, and while that seems like it should be a good combination, just look at Eragon. It just seems sort of boring and trite. Maybe try spicing it up with some things atypical of the genre or putting a twist on it? Is it in a modern setting? Try shifting the time around a little, maybe to feudal japan or steampunk europe, just to make it a little more interesting and out of the mold?

Also, the names "Crow", "Lucifer", and "Lucin" strike me as about as trite as the current story pitch. Is there any reason you picked them that have to do with the world or meaning, or do you just happen to fancy them?

:oops: Just my two cents.

Zontanema
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#4
Old 03-10-2008, 08:56 PM

Sorry, I wouldn't read it. It sounds uneventful and too conforming. Try to write something different that has a spark of personality.

Elixssam
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#5
Old 03-13-2008, 08:18 PM

I think I may just pick it up and read it. The story line is fairly interesting. :D

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#6
Old 03-18-2008, 09:26 PM

I think you should minimize the bloodshed and more focus one Lucin and Lucifer, bacause at the moment i agree with silverah. but if you make it more romance orientated it would be more interesting.

you see the problem now is that it's a romance + gothiclike and those 2 are usually not a good combination but if you light up the world a bit it could work out, just less gothic and dark

LadyKikyo
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#7
Old 03-27-2008, 12:55 PM

I agree, center it a bit more on the romance aspect maybe. I would probably at least read it either way though since I love manga and all that, but some stuff is way overdone anymore.

 


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