Liris didn't want this fleeting moment to end, if he could just stay like this forever everything would be fine. Give in to this weakness and be surrounded by this warmth, this sweetness. Liris had felt that connection, but his mind tried to deny it. There was only one thing he could be connected to, and that thing was dead. A shiver raced down Liris' spine as Ilya feathered soft kisses along his jaw and whispered those words over and over to him.

He wanted to believe those words, but he knew better than that. Liris was silent though, even the feathered kisses filled him with that warmth and he only wanted to be enveloped in that feeling now. He would let Ilya take advantage of him if it meant it would drive away the pain and sorrow. Liris moved suddenly, the large heart spilling clumsily from his lap as he threw both arms around Ilya and brought the other man down on his back against the couch. "Please..." His voice was a desperate whisper. "Make the pain go away again." Liris pressed his lips desperately against Ilya's lips.

He didn't know what to do, how to react or even go on. Ilya's arms wrapped around the other man instinctively, and he returned the kiss with passion, savoring the melding of their lips like the sweetest of confections. He couldn't say not. Impossible... But Goddess, he had no idea what to do! He had never touched anyone or held them before, not like this, never like this! Liris deserved so much more then inexperienced hands fumbling about.

"I've never done anything like this before," said Ilya the moment he had a second to do so. Not an inch of his clothing was where it should have been, and where skin met skin, he felt the most wonderful of electric thrills. Disheveled hair framed his features, fell across and framed the uncertainty and fear in his eyes. It all felt so right, even though seemed so wrong, giving in so easily to Liris.

If Liris heard Ilya's words, he made no indication of such. Desperation fueled him, it drove him. This need to feel anything but how he had been feeling, so it was no wonder he threw himself so completely at Ilya. Tumbling into that feeling, the pleasure that he could gain from this other male. Liris had no intention of stopping, it didn't matter to him that Ilya was inexperienced, he was too lost in the need and the want to care about such a trivial thing.

[guess we can do a time skip, unless Ilya is going to stop Liris.]

The whole experience, his very first, was bittersweet. It shouldn't have been like that, based on loss and sorrow and confusion, guilt tinged and filled entirely with lust. Ilya didn't want to look at Liris, but he did. His eyes snagged on the heart, fallen aside and forgotten for just a little while. For a little while ... Liris had been alright. He sighed, and shifted to cradle Liris close. What plans did the Goddess have, creating such a strong connection between this damaged man and one of her warrior mages? He couldn't know, might never know ... and the feeling would never be mutual.

But if Liris survived, moved past the loss of his dragon, wasn't it worth it?

"Was ... I hope I pleased you." Ilya glanced at the pile of his clothing, strewn about, at the paintings upon his walls, the bookcase ... anywhere but at the man in his arms. If Liris fell into his sorrow so soon after their joining, after Ilya had given himself wholly over to him, he had no idea what he would do.

That warmth, that sweetness, for moments more it lingered. Still embraced him even as Ilya embraced him. That warmth, it came from the warrior mage, and Liris basked in it for now. A few moments more. Let the feeling last, let it linger, let it replace all the negative emotions that still wanted to engulf him. He clung to Ilya, nuzzled against the other male, held tightly to him. Trying to keep that warmth. It was fast leaving though.

The sorrow, the pain it was fast crashing down upon him, guilt coupled with even more guilt. He had felt better, now he felt worse, because he knew he had wronged this young man. Liris had known what he was doing, but he hadn't cared, he hadn't cared because it had pushed away the sorrow and the pain. Now he had to face what had happened between them. He grit his teeth. Ilya didn't even know his name, he hadn't once uttered his name to this young man, and yet they'd done those things.

Liris pulled away, reluctantly it seemed though somewhat eager, he lifted the heart from where it had fallen and cradled it to his chest. He held it for a moment, then set it aside gently, gingerly on the closest table. He met Ilya's gaze for a moment, then looked away. "Liris. Liris Stormborn, is how I'm called." He sounded rather defeated, his voice just a whisper. Suddenly though, he had thrown himself against Ilya again. Clinging desperately, searching for that comforting feeling.

Cold ... He felt so cold and bereft when Liris pulled away. When the other man plucked the heart from the floor, Ilya felt jealousy stab through his own, the ugly feeling was so unfamiliar and irrational, so alien. Ilya couldn't believe he was jealous of a dragon, dead and gone, and yet he was, because of how obvious the red head's feelings were for his lost companion. His Goddess had laid a cruel burden upon her warrior. Ilya could only hope he could bear it, bear being used and then forgotten once the healing had been done, left behind.

His eyes widened when Liris finally spoke his name. Who hadn't heard of Liris Stormborn and his great dragon? Ilya had seen him once from afar, had seen how beautiful his partner had been. There was definitely no competition between the living and the dead. "Liris ..." He spoke it, savoring it as the dragon rider plunged into his arms again. He bent his head, and tugged Liris onto his lap, holding him as close as could be.

Liris Stormborn, proud and unbeatable. Unbreakable. Yet here he was, broken into pieces and shards, unsure of how to even put himself back together again, not even sure he could or wanted to. He let Ilya pull him onto his lap, his body slightly tense had he tried to hold everything in. This man's presence was so oddly comforting, almost familiar, but it shouldn't have been. Nothing should have been comforting against the pain that engulfed him. His bond with Glimmer shattered, a new bond could be formed, it wasn't impossible, it was just unlikely, improbable. But Liris could feel it.

It tugged at him, but his mind and heart tried to refuse such a thing. He wasn't ready to replace Glimmer yet anyway. And to have found something, someone to bond to so quickly, so soon? Were the gods and goddesses responsible for such a thing? Probably. He clutched at Ilya tightly, knowing he would have to tell this man these things and more. Tell him what had happened, but Liris wasn't ready for that, he wasn't ready for anything. "...I..." He began but buried his face against Ilya and fell silent.

Liris wanted to cry more. To weep until he died of dehydration, but he forced the tears away. Being held, it felt so nice. Like this was where he belonged.

He gave Liris a squeeze, and started running his fingers through the other man's salt encrusted hair. Would the dragon rider always smell of the sea to him now? Ilya could only wonder about that, and about how quickly things had progressed. One moment on the beach had changed ... everything. The most important thing in his life had always been the Goddess, even before he had become one of hers, and yet he would abandon his duties in seconds for this broken man. She had led him to Liris though, she was the one who had laid out this strange path for him.

Ilya pressed another kiss to the red head's soft cheek. "There's no need to talk, or say anything yet... Not until you're ready to. I told you, didn't I? I want to help you." Liris really needed a bath, and rest. Ilya just didn't know how to convince the other man that he did.

A part of him couldn't stand this, feeling like he belonged here in the arms of Ilya. He tried to deny it, but couldn't. He was here and it felt right somehow. It wasn't fair and it was far too soon for him to find such comfort after Glimmer. Part of him felt as if he were betraying his dragon again. Fingers ran through his hair and it was such a nice feeling, such a comforting feeling, he clung tighter to Ilya. He had to do something. He wanted to be engulfed in this feeling, but he wanted to fight it. He wasn't ready to forget his dragon, wasn't ready to let Glimmer be nothing but barely remembered memories.

Ilya kissed his cheek and spoke gently to him. Liris' body tensed and suddenly he was pulling away. Pulling away and shoving Ilya all at the same time as Liris moved to stand some distance from the other and the couch. "Stop it. Stop!" His eyes flashed and lighting lit up the sky outside, like it had earlier.

He had little control over the storm that was beginning to build in the sky once more, just as he barely had control over himself. Ilya had done nothing wrong though and Liris knew that. Liris had been the one to instigate such things. His eyes flashed again, outside lightning hit dangerously close, and thunder resounded loudly overhead.

It was too much, everything was just too much and far to sudden. Liris grit his teeth, his hands clenched into tight fists as he stood there, staring at Ilya. Something had happened, there was a bond between the two. Had Ilya cast a spell with his kiss? Or was it the work of the mage's goddess? Or was it truly meant to be? Liris wasn't sure, he wasn't ready for that last option. If it were forced he could fight it, but if it was something of the Fates, then there was no going against it.

Every thing stopped suddenly, the growing storm outside, the growing storm in Liris' eyes, as he crumpled to the floor. His hands on his head, as he sat on his knees doubled over sobbing suddenly and uncontrollably. A rain began to fall, then it stopped immediately, as Liris got a small bit of control over his wayward ability, but his sobbing continued. "....Don't touch me..." The words come out broken by sobs, but almost angrily.

Somehow he knew Ilya would try to come towards him, to comfort him. He didn't want that comfort, the other man had no right to be so damn comforting!

One moment, everything was perfectly fine. Liris seemed like he was beginning to calm, and then Ilya found himself on the floor, and a bruise beginning to form on his arm. He'd moved to stop his fall automatically; years of training had slid into motion in seconds. Ilya shook his head, closed his eyes to hide the hurt and wondered why thunder and rain were falling again. Was it because of Liris? It hadn't happened enough for him to be sure.

He had to think about that, rather then being pushed aside, thrown away, like some piece of trash. Liris was hurt. Liris had lost everything, and Ilya had to remember he had willingly let himself be used, knowing all of that, knowing that nothing would, or could, come of it. The mage slid to his feet and stepped to a nearby trunk. He pulled a blanket from within, and draped the warm wool over his sobbing guest. "You were the one to throw yourself at me, all I did was let you." Ilya tugged the blanket into place over Liris's shoulders, wrapped it around him tight. He couldn't believe he could sound so bitter and angry all at once and so fast. It wasn't like him.

"I'm sorry ... I shouldn't have said that." He regretted his words immediately. The warrior mage moved away then. Ilya got dressed again, tugging every piece of clothing neatly into place and forcing his emotions down as he did so, trying to ignore Liris's sobs.

Liris clutched the blanket when it was draped around him, pulling it tight about his body. Ilya's words made Liris grit his teeth, anger flashing in his eyes, lightning flashed in the sky. "You...seduced me." Liris sounded weary. Ilya hadn't seduced him. Not exactly, but that feeling. That warmth, that feeling of belonging, it had chased away the pain for the briefest of moments, that was what had seduced Liris.

Thunder crashed loudly overhead and Liris flinched slightly at the sound, as if just realizing the storm was brewing. He had to get control over himself, an uncontrolled storm could be devastating. Liris stood slowly, his sobs were under control but the tears still fell. He needed to clear his head. Somehow, he needed to clear his head. He couldn't think straight. Liris moved, grabbing that large heart and clutching it to his chest. He staggered, like a drunken man towards the door.

The storm still raged overhead, thunder and lightning filling the sky as rain came down in a torrent.

"Stop!" Ilya shot to his feet, hand held out as if the simple motion to halt Liris in his tracks; the warrior mage had stepped forward, closer, but hadn't touched the other man. "At least .. at least stay the night. Rest. Let me give you something to eat, some clothes." He shook his head hard and fought the sorrow he felt welling inside of him. Was this what being bonded to a dragon felt like? The mere thought of seeing Liris walk away ... it sent dread stabbing through his heart. But he could say none of that; such absurd thinking had no place in the mind of a trained warrior. It was pure infatuation, it had to be, nothing more then that.

"Please, stay ... I know what I did was wrong, but it was done with only the best of intentions. All I wanted was to make your sorrow disappear, if only for a little while.,,He hesitated, and stepped to stand in front of the door; Liris would need to convince Ilya to move if he truly wanted to leave. "Was it so horrible as that?" Though there were no tears in his eyes, Ilya's shoulders slumped, and he stared at the ground; his fingers dug into the cloth of his tunic, pulling and tugging at it, twisting it around til his knuckles were bone white.

Liris did stop, perhaps it was Ilya's tone that had stayed the man or something else. Liris was raging inside of himself, warring, and the torrent within him was only growing. The storm outside intensified. When Ilya mentioned making Liris sorrow disappear, the storm outside seem to explode, worsening by about tenfold as Liris bristled with anger at the warrior mage. Though most of that anger was directed more to himself than to Ilya, but how would the mage know that?

"Why?" Liris shouted the word and thunder seemed to echo his voice. "How can you? How is it possible that laying with you could ease such pain? It isn't right, it shouldn't...It can't! It's too soon!" The wind whipped about outside, threatening to sweep everything up and away, and Liris held Glimmer's heart so Ilya could see it. "How can I? How, how can I so easily betray my bond with another? Why? Why could it happen so easily?" Liris collapsed at Ilya's feet.

Everything outside stopped suddenly. Liris pressed his cheek against the dragon's heart, letting his tears fall on to it. "It shouldn't be possible. Not right now, not so soon. Why?" The anger had given way to confusion.

[COLOR="Black"]The storm outside raged, only worsening as Liris let his emotions out, let them run wild and finally allowed Ilya to see what was going on within his mind. He had to hate Ilya for making him feel anything but sorrow and self hate, something which the warrior mage hadn't even been aware of doing, though Goddess knew he'd tried all he could, everything.

When the other man held out the dragon heart, it took everything for Ilya to stay still. Reaching out to touch Glimmer's remains might very well lead to even worse emotions, and he didn't know if he wanted to be the cause of the storm descending into such chaos that it might very well burn the whole city around them.

When Liris collapsed, Ilya folded his legs so he sat upon the ground before the brokenhearted dragonrider. "I've no idea of what you speak." He reached out to touch the other man, stopping just short of doing so."But I would ask this of you, would you remain here and allow me to try and help you heal?"