Originally Posted by Thoth Star

@luan: But you LUV me right? 0 30 Hehe. Jk// K, I'm curious, why do you NOT like yourself? Already, I can tell you're a selfless, good person! ^^ I like you~

Thankyou (: I just don't like myself, I don't see myself as important or worth anything. If people say I'm good at something it just goes in one ear and out the other, cause either I don't believe them, or I think it doesn't matter at all. Maybe it's the fact I have clinical depression -.- Grrr.

Originally Posted by Thoth Star

I LUV TO BE HATED. <333

Why do you love to be hated? Do you not mind people disliking you? Or is that something you like because they're talking about you? Hahah ;]. I don't like people disliking me, but I don't care as much anymore. And there's always going to be people who don't like something about you, but then that's because they don't understand you.

Originally Posted by Staria

I'm just on prozac/floxetine right now. Something doesn't feel right though so I think I need to switch my meds...

Floxetine has been suggested to me, and I know someone at school who it on it. (I don't exactly know much about his condition, but he's sorta manic depressive/bipolarish I think?) They say that it mades them really happy for a while and then they crash, feeling worse than before. I don't think those will help me, but I'm also going on to some new ones, because mine (which I have been taking since May/June) haven't change anything, in fact I am worse. >.<

Yeah, the biggest problem with psych meds is the don't work the same way for everone. What will be perfect for one person will make another person deeply suicidal XD. It comes down to finding the right meds for you, and that's easier said then done lol.

I love me. ^.^ I have such a large ego, my world revolves around me. *giggles* I think everyone should have a big ego, at least large enough that they love themselves. For if you can't love yourself, who can you love? Thats one of the reasons why so many people try to be my friend in real life. I help people feel better about themselves. If I can look over and love my faults so can they. I draw people in with my confidence and philosohies.

@Thoth
Yes, I have to melow sometimes, but not all the time. I also have my opposite days to where I think that I should just burry myself in a hole for the day if I don't look good. I'm at least not as bad as my bf, and I love to take him down a peg. One of my fave comments from him was.
"God, why is everyone so below me?" I think he was kidding but to this day I always remind him of that comment. XD Soo funny.

@Staria: How high of a dose? Thats not good, that means your withdrawal would be very extreme... Less case studies is very BAD... Who knows how it can affect you long term!
I wish you could find an antidepressant that wasn't a drug... Like a person or a hobby!
I've been depressed before... and each time it happens a person somehow leaps into my life and SAVES me barely from the cascades of death and alters my life... Its always a good experience. I must have a powerful guardian angel! 8)
Yes, whutever it takes to cope with the harsh reality that is life! hahaha//

@Blkmage: Hmm I'm the same way... I clean with gloves cuz I can't stand having all the crud on my hands...>N< Mm, I know what you mean... I'm SUPER nit picky... strangely enough though I'm very GIVING of my own personal materialistic wealth...Money = Nothing to me...
Hahaha awesome! You're better at multi-tasking than I am! ^^ amazing...
That would be strange! XD *gonk*

@Luana: If you have a pretty soul than you're worth something to someone... Thats how I see it. Hm you were diagnosed as depressed? How old were you? are you on antidepressants? I think "Mind over matter..." we make ourselves sad by making everything harder and more confusing than it really is... Life is Simple. Just remember to love and be loved and you'll be fine. 8)

YES! To the second one... I'd rather have people HATE MY GUTS than be indifferent to me entirely... I hate indifference and uncaring with a passion! Sometimes when people ignore me I make sure to say something rude or nasty to them to stick in there mind~ Its fucked up, I know but its like programmed in my head to MAKE people remember me, no matter what the consequences are... I used to get beat up in highschool all the time becuz of it. >< and I'm not indifferent to the hate I spawn... I wish it were love but sometimes I feel the NEED to fuck with people... I get like bad urges... and this is my Safe Outlet.
Ech, Floxetine sounds liek a Very BAD drug indeed! D: I bet that would make someone sensitive like me kill myself... I'm already unstable enough without adding drugs n withdrawals to the mix... Whats the name of your new med?

@Syraa: Hehe Yay another person with egotism~ *huggles* XD Lol//
Exactly! Love yourself and than you can learn to love others too... its soo true!
*nod* me too... People are drawn to me... like moths to a flame. <3 hehe.

@rupert: Hmm bummer... I've never felt that way... I LOVE THAT! Yes, why is everyone below me? XD hehehe. I hope your bf takes your comments in good jest...

Yeah XD Problem with that is my depression is chemically based, I.e. the chemicals in my brain don't work right, I also have a rapid heartbeat. Unfortunately the only things that actually takes care of the physical or emotionally symptoms must also be chemically based. xD. I can actually be doing something I enjoy, be perfectly happy, and then the chemicals will switch and I'll feel sad for no reason and it won't go away until it decided to switch back. Yeah I can, and do, just keep on and pretend I'm not feeling it and focus on the activity but it doesn't change A THING . XD

@Thoth: It sounds easy saying to not make everything hard for yourself, but it's that I've lost the motivation and point to my life. I would love if someone came into my life and made me feel happy! But I don't have any good friends to talk to and I doubt some random person will jump into my life and understand me. :[ You're very lucky to have people who help you like that! I haven't had any special people altering my life, yet, however I don't see it happening anytime anyway. As to my age, I'm fifteen, and no it's not hormonal depression. I have been diagnosed with clinical depression, and I've, like I said, been on these tablets for quite a few months. I don't have the new ones yet, but hopefully soon I can try some different ones. I'm feeling really bad at the moment, and I'm really not sure if it's because I'm stopping taking these tablets o_o! Though I don't think there's a drastic change. How old are you if I may ask? (:

@Thoth and Syraa: You're right actually, everyone seems to orbit around the popular girl(s) who love themselves. It's not a good thing for people like me though, but if you ARE one of those kinds of people, I think if you reached out to the people who aren't very popular and treated them well, then you would be doing a really good thing to make them happier. Alot of girls that love themselves start to hate the people who don't love THEM, and that's really not attractive.

@Staria: Aw, I hope you find something to help you! I understand what you mean about your mood changing whenever and that it's hard to carry on. Though my depression stays in the back of my mind all the time, and it's really if I have time to think about it for just the slightest second to make me feel worse again.