i find males who have waited longer tend to be more mature relationships aren't all sex and people who think that are pretty narrow minded
i am currently with a guy whos 23 and still a virgin does it matter no why because he chose to wait
does it bother me
not at all
infact i kinda of find it sweet how hes managed to through it all show his "strength" in many's eyes because of it
i'm proud of his choice and wish i'd have been so wise myself

Personally, I place just as much value on male virginity as female virginity. I feel as if the high emphasis on female virginity stems from an era when women were considered to be possessions and no one wants a possession that's been used before. Since men were the 'owners' their virginity really didn't matter. This mindset has carried over to today to present itself as a double-standard. In this day and age I think it takes real strength to remain a virgin until marriage whether you're a girl or a guy, but if you don't, oh well, big whoop. I think sex should be an expression of love, and as long as you're in-love and careful and responsible then why remain a virgin? You can't really blame a girl for being in love and having sex before marriage, I believe. Likewise, you can't blame a guy. There's the argument that guys have more hormones and thus greater urges, so it's ok for them to have sex. Girls are supposed to be chaste because they don't have raging hormones, I guess. I have my doubt in this theory. Everyone's horny, lol. However I will say this. It's kind of nice though to have a virgin because you feel special being their first. I've only done it with guys who were virgins and I felt really good about it. But if you love them it shouldn't matter whether you are or not, no matter who you are. I just wish there wouldn't be a double-standard.

I think it would be great if the guy is a virgin, because that way he doesn't know if I'm lousy in bed or not. lol.

Not a big deal to me, i used to think it was but once i lost it i just became a whore, sex feels too good to hold it in and wait. I waited for someone special, they ended up breaking my heart anyway ... so in hind sight i wish i had just lost it to begin with so i could of been having fun the whole time instead of saving it.

I am a virgin myself on purpose, I believe in waiting till you find that special one you truly want to take it. I have found her but we want to make sure our relationship will continue to flourish first.

It all depends on the guy, really.
Some guys could care less, some think it's really important. ;3

On the whole virginity issue, I'd personally prefer to lose my virginity to a guy who's also a virgin for the simple and practical reason of no chance of STDs. The whole sluts and macho stuff is just society's views on women compared to men: while they have gotten much better over the years, they still don't treat women the same as men. It's the whole double standard issue, I think that the importance of virginity is a personal decision, otherwise society should let people do as they want without the tags.

First off; Good for you Kukon. =) Hope things work out well for you guys <3

Note: I use the term 'Fuck' as an expression of senseless sex without care to know the person at all. I also use the term 'sex' as an expression towards wanting to know the person or having feelings towards a person.

Onto the subject. I believe someone mentioned this already. Fucking as much as possible makes you hardcore! The big man! Don't you watch TV? The media puts out that boys/men MUST fuck at least four to five times a week or they are pathetic! Which, at this time most middle schoolers are watching these shows. Which they instill into their life because [so-so] did it so it's cool!

Media is corrupting the morals of the world. I am not the perfect guy out there. I have had my nights of fucking and of sex with people. Which one of the reasons behind it is alcohol. Alcohol diminishes your sense of morals, right vs wrong, your walking, and your judgment. I am not saying that is an excuse, but it is a factor in alot of people male or female having sex outside of marriage.

Is it wrong that a male's virginity isnt as sacred as a females? Yes. Segregation is in everything now and days. It isnt against the color of ones skin, or their ethnic background, or really even religion anymore. Its between males and females and your sexual preference in which things are segregated. Examples of this would be:
--Males can fuck and be considered cool.
--Females have sex and their considered whores and sluts."
--Two females kissing/fucking is considered the coolest shit in the world." - Yet they are not sluts.
--Two Males kissing/holding hands while walking down the street is considered an abomination to man in which they are labeled outcasts to society cause they have feelings for the same gender.

Could NOT agree more with Bartuc. This whole situation is ridiculous...and in all reality there really should be another sexual revolution. Change up the ideas. You know?

I actually prefer my men to have some experience with girls. (And if I choose, my women to have some experience with women.) Now I'd honestly prefer that that person be able to count the number of people they've slept with on both hands... but it's not that important. I really think that society judges men's virginity as something he really shouldn't have past a certain age. I think the men that save themselves for marriage (because of either personal or religious reasons) are very sweet, but I could never be their blushing bride because i would definately try taking that prescious virginity long before we said our vows. I myself actually tried to save my virginity until marriage and once I found someone I had dated for a full 9 months (and we had already started planning marriage and kids) I decided to slowly wade into the waters and give them a try. It opened up a flood gate of other problems... BUT... back to the matter at hand. Yes... I think the importance of virginity is all dependent on the person who posesses it.

LOL. Interesting topic. ;D
I guess men are more obsessed with things like that. If they let their little friends know, they'll lose their cool. LOL. But it's not like something you brag about.

oh damn i love that movie - memoirs of a geisha.

but eh, i do believe virginity can be important to a man as well to a woman.
me and my ex (broke up recently) lost our virginity to each other after 2.3 years of being together...

but then again, everyone is different, there are other men and women out there who think virginity isnt that important and see it as nothing.

I think on a purely physical level, once women have lost their virginity they are seen as not quite as good to have sex with, because the tightness of their vagina will have been compromised. Obviously the degree of this is infinitesimal and could only possibly be measured over prolonged time (assuming only normal intercourse is undergone).

In the case of a man's virginity, it is just the opposite. The penis loses nothing of its vigour and may well become a more effective instrument in time.

Therefore, popular conceptions about women with "t**ht p***ies" lead the crowd to favour virgins more highly.

This is only one aspect of a topic which also includes issues of a woman's virginity being part and parcel of the ownership of her husband (historically, most world cultures do not have a tradition of female dominance, thus the reverse would not work for men); quid pro quo, violation of that virginity could be seen as an attack on her husband more than to the woman herself.

At the end of it, I think the differing emphasis of male and female virginity lies in the objectification of women in varying, centuries old ways.

I don't think that male virginity in society has much importance anymore. Personally I have mixed feelings on this.
I like the idea that two people can get together and succeed in a relationship both having been virgins.
However, in my current relationship, I was a virgin and my significant other was a lot more experienced. I think it was good for me, because frankly, I was scared of sex. But, sometimes I look back and I wish he were a virgin when we did it. But then again, his experience helped to quell my fears of the act, so...
I'm still indecisive on the subject, but if the physical aspect means a lot; male experience is nice.
It's not physically as important, because people who are just out for some recreation prefer experience. Emotionally, it would have been nice because the act of sex is really emotional. It makes you vulnerable, and very defenseless. It can bring two people closer together, as two becoming one flesh is something that, at least for me, connects very deeply with my emotions. Sex can be beautiful when there's passion in it.

I would like for it to be just important as mine simply because I'm always so pressured and encouraged to keep mine. I would like to marry a male virgin so that we can experience it for the first time together, and we be our only partners.

But, I've accepted that men's virginity isn't as important as ours, because we bleed when we give it up. We make a blood pact with whoever breaks it. That's how I see it. It's like the Native-Americans who slit their palms and place them together to become blood brothers, although in sex, only the female sheds blood. The guy only nuts. But then if that is the case, the blood and semen mix. A pact is formed and the woman is tied to her breaker. That's no longer the case in today's society, but it holds strong with me.

The man doesn't start off with a virginity. His thing is all out there for all kinds of stuff to reach out and stain it. There you have it. :lol:

Not sure how it all works but i hear a few stories

1. Girl should lose her virginity other wise she isn't woman enough to -blush- please a guy
2. Girls are sluts if they sleep with more than 2 guys before senior year
3. If you are thinking about marriage and kids in your relationship it automatically means that you have *again blush* 'Done IT'

Boys I haven't really a clue, my dad told me to not fool around with guys until I'm married so thats what I'm doing.....though I don't think its wrong if girls/guys aren't virgins when married it's just I kinda want that for me (sorry it sounds so old ladyish)

My brother doesn't want to be Macho and he doesn't care who baits him he's waiting until he's married so thats one boy I know is still a virgin if they call them that....rambling sorry I'm so bad at that!! >_<

I honestly haven't taken a very strong stance one way or the other on this.

I believe that the huge value put on female virginity is overblown and outdated, a relic that we no longer need in the age of protection and women's lib.

As for men, they can be virgins or not, I don't think any less of them either way. I do, however, frown upon men that take unnecessary sexual risks by not using protection or those who haven't taken the time to educate themselves on how to use protection properly.

Hell, I know how to check a condom for holes and how to put it on and take it off and I'm a woman and a virgin to boot. Knowledge like that can never hurt you and it can end up saving you from unwanted pregnancies or nasty STIs.

Originally Posted by DeLish

I would like for it to be just important as mine simply because I'm always so pressured and encouraged to keep mine. I would like to marry a male virgin so that we can experience it for the first time together, and we be our only partners.

But, I've accepted that men's virginity isn't as important as ours, because we bleed when we give it up. We make a blood pact with whoever breaks it. That's how I see it. It's like the Native-Americans who slit their palms and place them together to become blood brothers, although in sex, only the female sheds blood. The guy only nuts. But then if that is the case, the blood and semen mix. A pact is formed and the woman is tied to her breaker. That's no longer the case in today's society, but it holds strong with me.

The man doesn't start off with a virginity. His thing is all out there for all kinds of stuff to reach out and stain it. There you have it. :lol:

Woah, what? That's a silly reason if I ever heard one. Bleeding doesn't make something more important. And not all women bleed their first time. I know this because I didn't bleed. I haven't bled any of the times I've had sex. In fact I thought that the whole bleeding thing was a myth. Or maybe caused by the male being too rough. Either way it's no excuse to try to put more importance on it.

honestly, I want to be able to say to my future wife who waited for their spouse "I waited my whole life to give you this" I do hear the "other guys" that i have seen described as one more girl just boosts your ego... I find that those kinda guys are pretty nasty. There are SOME guys out there that value their virginity as much as girls do =)

Originally Posted by Vickicat

Woah, what? That's a silly reason if I ever heard one. Bleeding doesn't make something more important. And not all women bleed their first time. I know this because I didn't bleed. I haven't bled any of the times I've had sex. In fact I thought that the whole bleeding thing was a myth. Or maybe caused by the male being too rough. Either way it's no excuse to try to put more importance on it.

I bled a little my first time, but that was also because I was born with a hymen. Blood after the first time is usually because of the tearing of the hymen. Some girls just aren't born with it, or it gets broken another way (for example, horseback riding).

i think it's because for guys it doesn't hurt. for most women it's a traumatic experience. even though it doesn't seem like it, the pain the body is put through is stressfull to the body it's self. one friend had symptoms for week after like she was having her period but she wasn't due for another two or three weeks and she was scared she might be pregnant. it turned out to be just her bodies reaction. xp it sucks for us.

so that's why i think guys aren't fussed about.

Heh, that's funny. I'm 19 and live in NY. I'm not ugly, or a bad guy. So I think I could have had sex by now if I tried.

But besides the fact that I was saving it for someone, I think sex is disgusting(but my body easily disagrees). I don't know. I feel like if I lose it to someone I don't care for, that I won't really be caring for myself, in a way. It's weird I guess. I don't consider myself like a normal typical male at all, so you can't really use me as an example.

Everyone has their own preferences. Just here to tell you that not all guys are sex driven (but my body really does try to erase that fact. It's pretty deadset on getting me to cave in and became a sex monster)

It has probably already been pointed out, but...religion tends to emphasize female virginity much more than male virginity. I'll go with what is practiced in Africa. Women there, Muslims and Christians alike, are subjected to excision at a young age. I am going to stick to as little detail as possible on this. Excision is female circumcision. It is done to make African women "pure". Yes, male circumcision is practiced as well, but...female circumcision can have long-term physical consequences that are very, very painful. This is done as a way to preserve purity and chastity despite being a gruesome practice.

Another thing I want to point out is how some cultures view a woman as shaming her family if she has sex outside of marriage, even if she is raped, but this view is not held for men.

Personally, I do have a great deal of respect for someone of either gender who feels the need to wait. However, like most other things, it's a personal choice. I've met guys older than me (I'm 19) who are still virgins. Yes, it has shocked me, but...again, it's a choice. Just as there is a lot of pressure put on women to remain virgins, there is a lot of pressure put on guys to lose their virginity. How the pressure is dealt with is a reflection of personal choice. I am quite capable of respecting people who aren't virgins, mind you. It's not something I care about. If a person is caring and has a good heart, that's more important to me than anything that they have or haven't done.

BTW folks do we have a name for a male virgin?...Like female virgins are called maidens?.

I don't think we do have a name for men who are virgins.