I decided to set me up a base camp for my random musings and story's on the site , i mean of course, I COULD post my personal writing site, but for my own reasons i think im gonna stay mysterious and keep my true identity hidden...unless someone guesses it, then i must lie...er...bend the truth, but anyways, enjoy, these writings will be purely ascetic and i wont use em for me job or anything else, besides posting em on my site, and maybe going into my book in the far far farrrrr off future.

check out this thread right hear. Help me by giving me character names that will help in my script writeing :D
http://www.menewsha.com/viewtopic.php?t=1354
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Can you hear me?

In a dark room devoid of any light and calming glows sits the man with no ears in his rocking chair. He smiles a crooked gummy smile showing his teeth severely in need of dental work. He glares wide eyed, a glowing stare with his gray eyes, and tenderly fingers his little metal trinket.

I remember once, I met the man with no ears, along with my love of once. We spoke to him, falling on what could essentially be called "deaf ears". We laughed and had a merry time with the man with no ears, and in reality, I was sure he was to, a smile never left my face, nor did his.
My love was different.
When she finally noticed our companion had nothing but blank patches of fetid flesh where he should have developed ears, she stared intently. Soon noticing more and more how she seemed to see him as a monster.
More and more he looked, decrepit, rotting, and evil to her, and finally when he caught her eyes, our merriment ended quickly.

With masterful precision, he pinned her and cut her throat, as she screamed a gurgling scream. I found the smile couldn't leave my face, as much as I tried, my brain wouldn't let me stop. He took the trinket he had opened her throat with and sliced off her ears and left her writhing body on the floor. He pushed past me and to the lone mirror in his room and put my loves ears to the place where his should have been. He groaned a displeased low bone chilling moan and pointed to the door. I left as I caught a glimpse of him devouring my loves ears.

I learned a very important lesson about the man with no ears that day.

Never let the smile leave your face.


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Whoa, that was...mega-creepy. And depressing. And scary.

I like it. :3

Why thank you person i know on two sites but doesn't know who i am :3.
your kind words make me feel mega happy.

Aaah, now that's my kind of story.

Great use of vocab and rhythm to create suspense. Keep it up! :)

Ooh, very nicely sadistic. <3
I enjoyed it once getting over some pet peeves.
Which is some grammatical errors and wrong words used, but otherwise fantastic.

If you want help with me pointing out these errors just ask. And don't hate me for mentioning this.

no no, please point em out, XD i did the same for you, it's the only way anyone can improve their writing is if they get questions and comments.

Okay.. the easiest way for me is to show and bold the changes I made. >>
Tell me if it's a bit too much.

Can you hear me?

In a dark room devoid of any light and calming glows sits the man with no ears in his rocking chair. He smiles a crooked gummy smile showing his teeth severely in need of dental work. He glares wide eyed, a glowing stare with his gray eyes, and tenderly fingers his little metal trinket.

I remember once, I met the man with no ears, along with my love of once. We spoke to him, falling on what could essentially be called "deaf ears". We laughed and had a merry time with the man with no ears, and in reality, I was sure he was to, a smile never left my face, nor did his.
My love was different.
When she finally noticed our companion had nothing but blank patches of fetid flesh where he should have developed ears, she stared intently. Soon noticing more and more how she seemed to see him as a monster.
More and more he looked, decrepit, rotting, and evil to her, and finally when he caught her eyes, our merriment ended quickly.

With masterful precision, he pinned her and cut her throat, as she screamed a gurgling scream. I found the smile couldn't leave my face, as much as I tried, my brain wouldn't let me stop. He took the trinket he had opened her throat with and sliced off her ears and left her writhing body on the floor. He pushed past me and to the lone mirror in his room and put my loves ears to the place where his should have been. He groaned a displeased low bone chilling moan and pointed to the door. I left as I caught a glimpse of him devouring my loves ears.

I learned a very important lesson about the man with no ears that day.

Never let the smile leave your face.

~oi~ thankies for the help

XD you where so nice, you even edited it,I feel like a jerk for my post now.

No no, don't be.
That post was good. I was aware there were mistakes because someone pointed them out to me.. I just didn't feel like flowing through all that to find them again.

Must point out again in just that post you using where in replace of were.. >.>

where - is someplace

were - you 'were'

wear - to wear.

Lol sorry. Just thought I'd point it out since you seem to be mistaking them.

*hides* Don't hate me.

XD, nah, sokay, it's little things like that i fudge up sometimes. it's good to refresh ma self~

Lol okay. Some people really hate when I point out such mistakes but it's such a pet peeve of mine I can't help it.

some people think im a pretentious jerk when i read their story's XD, because i also write, they think i think im awesome and hate them by default.
I dunt though, their are some awesome writers out there.

there instead of their >.>

Yeah.. some people dislike when I mention I've found mistakes in their work and they start bitching at me because I had the addacity to point them out.

Originally Posted by Kale Dragonheart

there instead of their >.>

Yeah.. some people dislike when I mention I've found mistakes in their work and they start bitching at me because I had the addacity to point them out.

audacity~

it helps them get better and not make those mistakes, some people are just babys.

Heh. :oops: Thanks.

So true. Now I just say I've found mistakes and if they want I can point them out.. like I did with you. Some bitch at me for even putting that and I hadn't even pointed them out!!

people are inherently sensitive sometimes, they work and work, and cant take crticism,
/rant begin/
take the other site i go to, the admin their is like that, bad mouth a feature and her will growl at you, maybe even insult you <.<. he also makes up stupid rules when i try and write an update for the storyline and makes me try and get staff input even when the staff are inactive or dont understand what he's asking <.<

/rant over/

~there~

Ouch. >.<
That's sucky gods... I would hate that.

yeah, he isnt the best with...grammar related things, and so besides that, he speaks weird sometimes and is hard to understand, and for the life of me i dont get what he's driving at with what he wants me to to do the storyline, pretty much what i got is he wants me to plan it out for a year. which pisses me off, cuss ya know, i write better when i aint restricted to a set storyline, it makes it so much less bland, i can work with what he whats me to have in there, just by god let me do something that isnt prepackaged, im pretty sure thats why lili quit and i got her job, he is kinda annoying <.,.

?rant end...again/

I hate deadlines on anything. I work much better when I'm not stressed out to finish something . .. >.>

Deadlines suck, which is why i feel sorry for the people who read stuff on my site and wait for me to post up a new story or chapter to my long story.
I can be quite lazy sometimes XD. or im focusing on my art more then my writing one day.
Mainly laziness.

YEah... I've been going through a writer's block but I've been so lazy to writing I have time during the day to force myself but I don't because I'm such a procastinator.

XD i dont have blockage~ just laziness.
i hope you pass your writers block.

on an unrelated note, wanna see my writing site?, it has a ton of my writings, including all my storyline work for the other site.

sure. :)

http://www.freewebs.com/pandareb/index.htm

my freind sponges writings are there XD...god how i have a yearning passion for her <., shame she left me and went on her little dating spree XP me and hear are so alike XD, we do alot of the same kinds of stuff, neither will admit it though, im starting to though
.

but yeah, everything else but mirror mirror is mine.

and i have my videos up there,
im the skinny blonde and brown haired kid in all of em.

Ah cool. *faves it for later*