The embrace was purposeful. The touch was meaningful. It was not the accidental tap of elbows as they walked, or the lingering pat on eachothers' shoulders. It was not followed by moments of awkward thoughts and criticism, and the truth behind each movement was laid bare for the world to see and deal with. And although the world shared between them was small, it contained more depth than the majority could comprehend.

This wasn't necessary. It was a show of the bond- the true bond- between them. It was done willingly although not under the most normal circumstance, under the calm of stars. And the feeling it spread was... Glitter. A warm sort of glitter that prickled at the skin, like the stiff fur of a loving puppy.

Jerry couldn't help it. He leaned back, shamelessly surrendering his body into Jat's arms. Jat was warm. Warm enough to soothe the cold out of someone's body, but not hot enough to smother. Not literally, at least. Jerry rests his head lovingly against Jat's shoulder, his triangular ear pinned against the side of Jat's head. In a way that seemed almost elegant, he folds a hand into a loose fist, palming at Jat's opposite shoulder.

(sorry!! -shoots self-)

A moment of comforting bliss, a moment in which would be the perfect time to stop. To lock the boys in the eternal embrace now and forever, never to re-establish to move from this point in time but leaving both boys happy to be stuck that way for eternity.

Jat closed his eyes nuzzling into the smaller boy wishing that this could be so and soon slowly drifted into a light sleep dreaming it to be so. His arms didn't slacken around Jerry, but his exhaustion finally got the better of him and took him into it's welcoming embraces of darkness and healing sleep.

((*shoots self several thousand times*))

The spider of sleep had begun to spin its web, the silken blindfolds of slumber disrupting Jerry's view, distorting the world around him to colors. At first they were vibrant, for the blurred line between consciousness and blackness was the point where drugs imprisoned addicts. The colors were too vibrant, irritating his eyes. But as he passed from one dream to another, the flutter of his lashes obscured the dulling hues.

It had come much too easily. The last time... When was the last time he had been able to lose himself to darkness with peace? Right before the sky shattered above the head, the falling shards barely missing his ears. He had woken from a dream to a nightmare and he was terrified of deja vu. This was too beautiful to lose to weariness, too beautiful to risk losing. But they had had a long... Day? Week? He had lost all sense of time.

((>.> I don't think the Block left me, Kale.))

Through the night Jat's embrace of Jerry slackened, his hands landing in the smaller boy's lap. His face had nuzzled into the boy's neck and the scent of sweet blood woke him before dawn. The scent disturbed him, the fact he could smell it off of Jerry from being near him scared him.

The one thing that was comforting for the moment was that he wasn't thirsting for it. Didn't feel the urge to bite into that sensitive flesh... Needless of that he moved back and let his head rest against the tree. How would this be possible for him? He was a risk for his friend...

Reality soon returned. He was a threat to everyone around him. He was a threat to those he loved... He could easily accidentally kill his friend because of his thirst.. but .. he knew his friend wouldn't survive without him either. It was a lose-lose situation and he was more scared of hurting his friend than being captured all over again. A sole tear fell down his cheek as he closed his eyes praying for the first time in his life that nothing would put him in that situation.

It was movement that awoke the kitten from his troubled slumber, a disturbed toss of his delicate body causing him to squirm awake. At first he was scared. Too scared to open his eyes in case something had gone wrong while he was lost to his darkening dreams. For a moment he could have sworn that Jat was gone, but when the idea shocked him awake, he was relieved to see that his friend- his lover- was still there. There, but troubled.

It was strange to see him like this. Jerry had never seen his friend pray before, but a lot of firsts had happened in such a short time. And like all the times before, he wasn't sure how to react to what had been thrown to him. And so he did what he did best in any unknown situation: fidget awkwardly until it went away. He didn't want to disturb his friend, but he didn't want to say nothing either.

ooc: >.o; Gah. I'm useless, but at least I don't owe you my cash now. xD

Jat's eyes opened to look at Jerry when he felt the smaller boy move and fidget. A small smile twitched at his lips as he pushed his fears aside, it wasn't his place to scare his friend by showing any unease they were in too easy of a situation to make Jerry freak a bit too much. To know his friend could easily be one to harm him would be a bit too much for him to handle at this time.

"Morning," Jat murmured to him the smile growing less forced as he leaned forward again and embraced him gently the scent of blood unmissed and barely noticeable now that he had something else to think about.

Looking around their makeshift camp he sighed, he wouldn't mind staying here another day but they had to keep moving and it was about time they do so as well. "We better eat and get going quickly.."

Nature was never beautiful in the kitten's onyx eyes unless gazed upon from a textbook or photo for many reasons. The foamy curves of a waterfall were intricate and easily studied when depicted on paper, whereas the unmatched force of the real thing had the potential to be harmful for his health. The rush of water people often observed in awe and amazement simply sent trembles down his spine, a painful reminder how easily he could be swept below and dominated. But this ragged scene, formed of desperation and threaded from link after link of misfortune... It contained a beauty no other force of nature could ever hope to imitate.

For a few moments, Jerry found it difficult to want to leave. It was a bittersweet place. On one hand, the air was suffocating, spun with tension and a muted fear of being found. On the other, this was here he was able to find something he couldn't find anywhere else. Freedom. It was tainted with the evil of the man chasing them, but it was one of the most important points of his life. But when he turned back to Jat, a weak smile forced onto his lips, he nodded in agreement. At the same time, he pledged that if he ever his humanity back, he would return here and remember.

ooc: >.> Faaail, Anna. FAIL.

Jat stood up slowly stretching his back so it'd crack, trees weren't comfy things to sleep against. He was stiff but it was worth cuddling with Jerry. Carefully moving around Jerry he stomped on the spot the fire had been to be sure it was fully out.

He looked around at the clearing for a moment though. He regretted having to leave and he began to wonder how safe the cottage would truly be.. would they be able to find them there? This is what scared him, to get to their recluse and find that it isn't as safe as he hoped and he wondered if they should move on.

Bending over the packs he pulled out what was left of the rabbit and grabbed a morsel for himself taking a bite. He was pleased to realize it was just as appetizing as blood for him, maybe he didn't have too much to worry about as long as he made sure to eat. This pleased him as he grabbed a second and offered the rest to Jerry.

A set of pale hands clasped upon instinct, triggered by the sight of a meal. He almost smiled sheepishly, stopping immediately when he saw his lack of nails. The resulting expression was a bittersweet expression of disturbance and intrigue. A finger moved to press down at the tip of another, his heart quivering when his touch confirmed the soft skin. Suddenly scared again, his eyes quickly snapped close and his lips murmur a swift prayer, the shortest he had uttered in his entire life.

"Thanks Jat," he adds, gently accepting the piece of meat from the vampire's hand.

He hadn't known how hungry he was until he had seen food, but was happy he had something to appease his grouchy stomach with. Trying to make the small morsel last, he chewed slowly, trying to figure out what he could compare it to. Chicken? Anything in this world could taste like chicken, but Jerry had forgotten what chicken tasted like. Had it really been that long already?

Jat eyed Jerry's hands for a moment startled by the lack of nails but pursing his lips he watched Jerry in silence. He wondered what Jerry's reaction would be, the small amount of reaction got Jat thinking that Jerry was slowly getting used to the unnormal becoming their reality. Jat wondered if that was slowly happening to him as well.

A smile crossed Jat's lips, neither happy nor sad but somewhere in between as he waited for Jerry to finish the makeshift breakfast. Slowly as he waited he scattered dried leaves and branches over their makeshift fire pit to mask either of them being there at first glance and stuffed everything within bags.

Slowly he allowed himself to calm enough to feel for the wings to protrude and with another sudden gasp of pain and streaks of blood down his back they were out. He closed his eyes as he felt his muscles and skin knotting together with the wings to make them functional.

He stood waiting a small part of him thinking he should allow Jerry time to digest so if the boy got sick it wouldn't be all over him. It was safer though to get moving as soon as they were both ready.

It was amazing how the curve of one person's lips could represent the dew of morning, the gentle spray of the world's awakening. It was the slightest touch of tingle, but it could fill the cup of pessimism to the point of overfilling. It could melt away the troubles disturbing a twisting stomach and trembling heart, and one couldn't help but touch and send ripples throughout the design. But it was forbidden to attempt to send such beauty into disarray, such a terrible crime to attempt to vandalize something so high above him. Jerry would have bet his newly found tail, which was now resting uneasily behind him, that luck was laughing his- her- its- ass off at him now, to be toying with his future and fortune only to have something to laugh over the morning coffee. It was a depressing thought, so expressed by the devastated crumple of the soft triangles once perked sleepily over his hair. Such shameless attachments, cursed upon his head! It was humiliating how easily they demanded pity or attention, how much closer he was to imperfect while his lover could laugh through any natural disaster and emerge with not a hair in its improper location. Gratitude was something stitched into his very foundation since his womb, for his joy when laughter and for his past laughter when tears, but this was simply too befuddling to appreciate. Jerry could almost feel his throat tighten into a scream of frustration, for some release to rid himself of the pressure. What did the world want? It had given him the greatest gift, only to fill his heart with continuous self-doubt and worries of being unworthy.

Jerry looked the exact opposite of the perfection he often described Jat as. For one, there was an absolute lack of life. Communication did not come easily to the loner, result of the fact he did not have many chances to gain experience on the subject. But to make sure he never truly realized, his subconscious had chosen a sturdy foundation and built a barrier. It encased a small world of inner thought and hatred, something that threaded into the walls as a constant reminder of sin in the outer regions. But it also had his secrets, hidden strands of gold that illuminated the walls and gave encouragement to its standing when battered. It kept secrets and buried much of the truth, dormant so long it feared this new outside. The door had been opened, but what lay beyond it ensnared and repelled at the same time. There had never been a crack in this masking, until came Jat. The first, the only. The one Jerry expected to play knight and savior. But the original spell had become to strong and was unwilling to surrender the stability it had. And this conflicted with his physical and emotional attachment to his only friend, spiraling to doubt and self hatred for said doubts. It was a circle, a pattern. And when the circle spun around and around to hold him captive, he missed something else that simply sprung the trap again.

The colorful metaphors had humored the situation, painting thick layers between his eyes and mind to turn his attention from reality once more. The shell of muscle and bones quickly straightened into a decent posture at realization of what had happened. The multicolored brushstrokes smeared his vision as he tried to clear his eyes, back to a more painful world, the more important world. He had been distracted again by the temptation of a better place, like a moth drawn to a lantern. And as always, he had gotten too close to the dancing crimson and reawakened as ash on solid ground. The work had been done and their temporary shelter disguised as an untouched, uncontaminated part of nature. As usual, he had stood aside and hid in the face of danger, handing the reins to Jat like a hunting hound expecting protection from mountain lion. A sigh trickled from his lips, stolen by the gentle breeze. And although he struggled to master the art of apathy, his fingertips had already torn at his chest in search of his lost pendant and his ears pinned piteously against the side of his head. What a bother and a hindrance it must have been for Jat, to want to sprint forward, only to turn back to pick up his fallen teammate! In this moment of thought, he promised himself for the thousandth time that he would be of some use.

“Hey Jat, need any-�

One could almost hear Lady Luck screaming in hysterical laughter.
Jerry's skin regained that certain hue, that mixture between a sickly white and an equally sickly green. The world threatened to tip the glass and blend like so many paints to create that icky color that often disappointed kindergartners on a quest to discover a new hue of purple. Determined to beat the desire to faint, the kitten closes his eyes and eases his head into his trembling fingers, panic destroying and blocking every other sense that connected him with the world. There was black and there was nothingness, nothing to fall from and nothing to balance on. It was a confusing world, it was fear. It spun and confounded him, each black so similar to the first it almost seemed as if nothing were moving. But something was moving, and as he tried to regain his footing, one unsure step cost him his balance. He was falling, falling. He didn't know where to, he didn't know where from. But he was on his knees, somewhere in all that blackness, his free arm shaking violently as he tried to block out the nightmare. He was frightened and did not want to see what demon he landed upon, keeping his eyes closed like a coward.

Jat was bleeding. Bleeding. Hurt. Something hurt Jat, he was hurt.

The words blended, the thoughts clung to one another. They were as wild as he, resounding from walls that couldn't be seen, that didn't exist. They detached and reattached from and to one another, to the point where all that remained was panicked jargon. A name. A verb. A fragment, a command. His lips had parted more than once to cry these words aloud, in their nonsense order, but found his throat was much too dry to utter the slightest gasp, nevermind express something he could barely comprehend himself. It was almost like watching a fish jerked so unexpectedly from the water, gasping for air in this alien territory. Just like that fish, it wasn't interested in the details of the situation. All that was recognized was need. The bare, simple need to make it go away, to shake and scream until mercy was brought upon by God. And shake he did, voiceless and mute, almost entering a state of silent hysterics as he fell whimpering to the ground.

((Baha Got back at you for your long post.. >.> Though it's still not quite as long as your own but I'm getting better at Getting into Jat's head and typing it out!!))

It was ironic how much you missed the normal when you used to wish that something interesting and out of the normal would happen on any normal day. You wanted school to be closed down, you wanted a life where you could slack off with no worries, you wanted a life where everything was free and you don't have the necessity of work holding back your life. You always would think how cool it would be if there was some danger out there that you had to be wary of, some zombie movie come to life say or the vampires out of books hiding in the shadows relying on the stories only to be believed as stories. Now that it was happening though, it was not as cool as Jat thought it would be. The thought that at any moment a flank of soldiers barging in on the clearing they made their sanctuary sent fear coarsing through his body tighting his chest muscles so much he felt he couldn't breath at times. He had to keep his fear at bay for Jerry's sake but he wished he could crumple and let all his fear and frustrations out by crying, breaking things and just screaming in general. The world he once wished for had become a nightmare that he could not rid himself of by waking up, he kept feeling the uncanny temptation to pinch himself to prove that this is merely a dream but the pain he already felt was enough to tell him it was not.

Irony still played out around their sanctuary. Such a beautiful place, a place Jat wouldn't have minded to camp out at for days back when his life was normal. Now it was a place to hold what others would call freaks or monsters, the words themselves still put images of hideous creatures through Jat's mind. Hideous enough to set such a beautiful place to look just as ugly, the opposite of a sanctuary to protect. Always confident in his looks Jat had never faultered about what others would think of him, now fate was playing him almost as if to say he had good looks for far too long, had others think of him as good looking for far too long, now it was time to feel the opposite spectrum.

Jerry's words were almost missed by his ears, his mind playing too much on the negative where it used to be on the positive side. All his life he managed to keep on the positive knowing it was the best way to help Jerry who always thought on the negative. But here yet was another change Jat wished he was without. He hated hiding things from Jerry but he feared that if Jerry knew how far he had fallen Jerry would fall all that much more into despair. Something Jat was determined to stop from happening as best as possible.

A shift of his wings allowed him to actually feel the new muscles within his back, the pain had died away and the blood had stopped when the muscles and skin knitted onto his new appendages. Jat's head turned when he realized Jerry had been talking to him, in time to see him fall forward. Fear seeped through Jat as he rushed to Jerry's side his eyes swept through the trees thinking somehow Jerry got hurt or someone out there had done it. When he seen no one though he let his eyes wander over Jerry's body looking for any sign of injury but soon it became apparent that he wasn't injured but panicing.

Jat paused only a moment for a sigh of a little relief before he rested an arm across Jerry's shaking shoulders and with his other hand lightly stroked back the smaller boy's hair. He wanted to pick Jerry up and hold him, but the moment seemed too soon. He could smell the fright that was going through Jerry's veins clearly. Jat feared for Jerry's sanity and cursed another time to himself for bringing all this pain and confusion into Jerry's life. Why couldn't he have just lived the normal life? Why couldn't he have been happy being the teenager with excentric tastes and only friend of Jerry's? Why had he looked for something different?

“Jerry...� Jat whispered into the triangle shaped cat ear perched upon his friend's head, gently leaning over the boy. “What's wrong?�

Jat wished he could make things right with his friend. It'd been his duty in the life before now and it was much more so now that both of them were alone. Throne into a world of uncertainties where it would be easiest for the steady minded Jat to fall into a panic attack such as this. Only if he had there'd be no one to comfort him because Jerry would see it as a good time for he himself to panic. He had to keep himself strong for Jerry's sake. He had to see to it that they both survived through this.