My Star Wars based short story

06-17-2007, 08:58 PM

A short Story that I wrote about an Star Wars Oc of mine. Let me know what you think, and if you can think of a good title for it(I'm bad at titles):

Quote:

Soft mumbling came from a Chef, as he spoke to a young waitress who appeared to be in a daze. Her eyes were staring at a spot on the wall, and the moans of the impatient chef grew louder and louder until he let it out, and screamed at the poor girl.

“Maki Sekel! You listen to me right now! Table five needs you to take them their food now.”

Spoke the cook in a hurry as a plate filled with Gizka steak and other food mashed slide in front of the girl. The Nikta was then slide across the table top, slipping a little bit of the liquid on the already dirty table.

Honey brown eyes blinked, hearing only the words five and food, as the young Theelin girl looked up just in time to see the plate come sliding across the table, and hit her arm. A thick brown mush quickly flied off the plate, coving the skin of Maki’s arm and quickly causing a squeal to come from her mouth.

“Haroush Grouto! How dare you throw food at me when I wasn’t looking! That’s very rude ya’know!”

She squealed at the Head chief, who happened to be an Ithorian man and a slave as well. His black eyes looked at her with a small glitter of laughter at the complaining young girl.

Of course Grouto wasn’t trying to be mean, considering he cared for Maki as a little sister, but he knew that they needed to keep on schedule or else quite a few problems would occur with there owner. There owner, Shan’ku was a kind slave owner, compared to a few out there. He didn’t like having slaves as ‘dancing girls’ but preferred for them to work hard and in his cantina. But, he did have a few dancing girls, just to keep the Cantina running smoothly and good. So, being his slave wasn’t so bad for Maki.

Grumbling to herself, Maki began to put the food on a tray, being careful not to spill anything on the floor or counters. But, she wasn’t really that worried about that, considering ever since she was little she had a knack for keeping things from falling and balancing things with ease. It was something… different was all she could think of. Almost as if something was helping her to do that, and as much as she wanted to tell someone else, she could only say it to her Grouto, who didn’t understand the importance of it.

Looking back at the now balanced tray, Maki walked over towards table Five, walking with a certain kind of bounce and smile that was quite strange for a waitress. She walked as if nothing was heavy, and as if the food was glued onto the tray. But, no one seemed to notice in the busy Cantina and she soon enough arrived at the table to see one man sitting there by himself.

“Sorry about the wait Sir! The Names Maki, and I’ll be your waitress for the rest of the evening!”

She chimed in, a grin on her pale features as her honey brown eyes looked up to see the man.

“If you need anything, just ask away!”

She said, grinning even more as she placed the tray carefully down. Moving quickly, she took the cup off and the plate and then looked back up at the man. She looked up, and saw the lips part as a question came from his lips, in a smooth voice that reminded her of someone from her childhood.

“You’re not a pure Theelin are you? Part… human correct?”

He asked, looking up at the interesting young waitress, and then moved quickly to pick up the cup and took a sip of if.

Maki’s eyes opened widely as she looked at the man, and felt a piercing smile come to her peach lips. She was use to people thinking she was pure blooded, considering her bright purple hair and the skin spots that were on her face and body. She was quite strange on the outside, and the only Theelin slave that owner owned. But, when he bought her he as well thought she was a pure blood. But, her skin was the only way to tell.

“How did you know! My mother was a Theelin and my father was human, or at least that’s what I was told. You see, I don’t.. really remember them.”

She said, her voice getting softer at the last part. Her darn family selling her so that her mother could become free, it wasn’t fair to Maki, for being born to them. She hated them for it, and felt her eyes almost want to tear up. But luckily the voice of the man distracted her.

“I see Miss Maki, but don’t let that worry you. But, I do wonder if you could get me another cup of Nikta before I’m done. You see I’ve already nearly finished this one.”

He spoke as he pushed the money into her small hands, and noticing she didn’t have anything on to help her with balancing and the such, and he was more than surprised at that. He also was surprised to notice that her forearms and He looked at her with surprised eyes, but then forced himself to smile as he waved her away to get a drink.

Her face blushed slightly, Maki moved quickly and scuttled back over to where Grouto was and muttered quickly.

“Another Nikta please!”

She chimed to him as her arms rested on the cabinet as she waited for it.

Her mind sat there, trying to think on what all was happening. This stranger, who she quickly nicknamed Mr. Stranger, was quite strange and she wondered about what all was going on with his odd questions. He wasn’t asking questions that most guests asked and that quickly made the young girl excited about going back to give Mr. Stranger his drink.

“Maki… Maki.. Uh… it’s ready child.”

Spoke Grouto once again, getting annoyed with the young girl who wasn’t paying attention very much. He placed the drink in front of her, and on the tray.

Her eyes popped open, as she quickly scratched the side of her head, as she looked up at Grouto.

“I’m sorry Grouto! I’ll make you something to pay ya’back for all of this!”

She giggled, as she took the drink and quickly pranced back over to Mr. Stranger. Looking at him, she grinned as she started to put the drink down on the table. But, in just a matter of moments something came moving faster than she had ever seen, and hit Maki in the rear.

Nearly falling over, Maki felt it happens again. Her arm moved faster than the bottle and caught it on the tray before it could fall over on the floor, and give Maki a good beating. Her eyes blinked yet again, as she looked up at Mr. Stranger.

“I’m so sorry about that, but nothing fell on the floor. Here’s your drink Mr. Stranger.”

She said, not even noticing what she had said. Her eye blinked as she noticed how rude that was, and awaited a slap from the man.

Moments passed…

And nothing happened to Maki, and her eyes looked back up at Mr. Stranger. He seemed to be smiling, and writing something strange in a note pad. She looked at him strangely as he moved back over and finished his meal.

Standing there like a child, She awaits him to say something, anything to keep her interested but silence was the only gift she got. After a while, she turned on her heals ready to leave and go to the kitchen to mope or complain. But, his voice caught her ears just in time.

“Maki, do you know of Jedi’s?”

He asked quickly, causing the young girl to turn around in shock. Just saying that in here could get you beaten or shot, but why was he asking her such a thing. Unless… he knew of one? Or was one? No.. That couldn’t be, and she quickly spoke to him.

“I have Sir… but I’m not allowed to talk about them. It’s the Masters orders.”

She said softly to him, as her eyes looked up and saw him expression of confusion and something else. Who was this man? She really was wondering, and suddenly felt herself speak despite what she knew was right.

“… Later tonight I can talk about them… about one in the morning though. So I’m sure you wouldn’t be interested.”

She said, looking to him with a sigh. Why would he be interested in talking to her so late at night? That was the only time her master allowed the Slaves out, considering people wouldn’t be allowed out of the town at that time. She turned ready to face him this time, and her brown eyes looked in shock at him.

“Then meet me outside of this Cantina then.. Ok Maki.”

The words caused her heart to start to pound, trying to figure out what was going on. This strange was changing everything and She wished that she understood why. Her eyes blinked as her head nodded ‘yes’ to him.

“Good, and here’s a tip for the meal.”

And then he was gone, just about as fast as he arrived in there, leaving only a warm spot and a small wad of bills left in her hands. She looked around, blinking and wondering what all had happened in this short night and in moments had quickly began to clean the table until the Cantina closed.

Hours passed by as slow as a Duracrete worm trying to compete in a race, and Maki found herself standing in a corner of the Slave quarter’s bathroom, attempting to make herself look good for the night.

She stood there with a thing of brushes, combs, and gel’s as she attempted to brush and style the Purple mess that was called her Hair. It took attempt after Attempt, doing it over and over until it ended with a half-decedent style.

After that she began to clean her face, and each part of her body the best that she could as the hour of midnight passed. Then Maki felt the nerves began to set in, although she didn’t know why. She didn’t know this man.. But was meeting with him. It was like something from a hologram, a rare thing that didn’t seem real. But its was, and a single bell rung in the background.

It was one in the morning, and Maki felt a squeal leave her lips. This was more than exciting and she couldn’t help it. This man, Mr. Stranger was interesting to say the least and now she had someone to talk to. Moving quickly, she started outside prancing and hoping with each step to where the Cantina was. Of course, it was a few blocks away but Maki didn’t let that stop her. She would get there, and be ready to talk.

As she approached, the form of a man stood there leaning against the wall of the building. Maki moved quickly towards him, smiling and grinning as she waved at him. He quickly waved back to her, and moved towards her with a smile on his face. But, the words he spoke were very fast and quick, and she at first was more than confused with what he said.

“Maki, I’m sorry for making you wait like that. My name is Tare Su’lan and I’ve come here for you in fact. You see, I’ve heard of a young girl with talents in the force. My friends, well they’ve agreed to assist me in sponsoring you at the Academy, which will give you freedom from here. Do you understand me so far?”

He asked her, squatting on the floor and looking down into her brown eyes.

Maki’s eyes were wide, tears about ready to flow out. Most of what he said, she had no Idea what he was speaking about. But the word freedom she did understand. Freedom from serving Freedom from the beating and Freedom from the Prison that she was in, and it meant all that to her. She would have a real chance to live and maybe visit the places that she heard of from all the travelers.

She looked up at him and felt her arms crash around His neck, as tears did come.

“I want to.. Be a Jedi… and free!” she said, crying and smiling more than any thing else. Her hair was once again a mess, after all the hard work it took to fix it up earlier. She hugged the man, and felt something cover her nose, causing something strange to come in her taste buds.

It smelled funny, but still quite nice compared to some things she had smelled before, but then she noticed something was off. The world was getting darker and darker, and she looked up into Tare.. Or Mr. Strangers eyes to see him smiling. What was going on?

Then.. It was black for good.

~~~
A few days later
~~~

Nausea woke Maki from her slumber, as she felt her eyes began to water and her hand search for a bucket or pan. She didn’t care what, she just wanted something to throw up in. Her hands searched aimlessly as her mouth mumbled,

“Bu-cket!!”

Someone noisy began to mutter by hear and she felt something quickly pierced the skin on her right arm with a tiny hole. Her Brown eyes tightened close, as she attempted not to scream from it. But, soon enough everything began to get more focused and smooth. She collapsed backwards, with a sigh of relief coming from her lips.

But, she fell on something soft, and she looked around once more at the room.

“WHERE AM I!!!”

She felt herself scream in terror at the room she was in, The form she noticed, you remember the one with the evil-sharp-thing, as Mr. Stranger. She felt her eyes widen as she tried to understand it all.

But, luckily he spoke before she could start asking questions.

“Well, I kinda stole you.. I’m sorry for doing it in such a rude way but there was no other way to get you out. You see your master was refusing to sell you since you were such a rare race. But, I happen to think that’s quite unfair. Your not something to show off, you’re a real person … not a druid or pet.”

He started off, as he then continued.

“Right now, you’re on my ship. I know its not very fancy, but I didn’t want anyone to get to worried or question me when I arrived on the planet. Next time, I’ll have you in a more stable ship. But were headed to Coruscant right now. You see… I’m taking you there to try to get you to become either a Jedi or a Sith, I know it doesn’t make a lot of since but you need to trust me on this matter, Ok?”

He asked to Maki, who quickly nodded her head in excitement. A lot of this wasn’t making since, but she did understand that she could become a Jedi or a Sith. She wasn’t fully sure of their difference but was excited about it either way. He continued on,

“Well, when we arrive there you’ll have an interview and will have to talk with the others. Do you understand?”

He asked again, but once again received a glomping Hug to his neck.

“Yes Sir Re!!”

Maki Chimed as her future began to become more clear, and brighter, despite being on a ship, and she looked outside at the stars threw her tear filled eyes.

“I’ll do it!”