They heard muffled singing down the road and Anya's face lit up.
"Oh no." Spike tensed, "No. No. I am not going anywhere near any quote unquote delightful musical numbers. No."
"Sounds like it's coming from the pub. Ooof!" Anya made a surprised sound as Spike pushed past her.
She rolled her eyes and then followed him in. The joyful noise had faded to almost nothing.
There were a few people humming but the song had mostly died out. An overly muscled chap was pouting on a bar stool.
Anya thought he was too bumpy. She like Xander's bumpiness but this guy seemed to be compensating for something.
No one... drinks... like Gaston? A very ugly little man half-heartedly sang to the beefy fellow
and tried pushing another pint toward him in an attempt to cheer him up.
Ah. That was the large man's name. Anya mused.
So this is Beauty and the Beast and figures we land in the boring part without any talking furniture.
"Wanna bet?" Spike crowed. Anya laughed nervously and tried to pull the vamp away from the bar,
hissing in his ear "Or we could try
not calling unnecessary attention to ourselves."
"Too late, looks like." Spike shrugged off Anya's protests and stepped forward to address the pub's patrons
who were all staring at him with gaping mouths. "Right. I'll put up fifty bucks that I can out drink this lout."
A ripple of confusion went through the crowd.
One of the triplet bimbettes - this one in pink - leaned into Anya, whispering, "He's betting DEER??"
Before Anya could think of something scathing to say to the simpering thing Gaston's voice rang out.
Clear, confident and overly loud.
"Very well huntsman. I will relieve you of your venison."
Spike looked a question at Anya. "Is this pillock hitting on me?"
"Deer." She explained.
"I'm not your dear, pet. Last I checked you were with Xander. Course if you're looking to trade up.." His lips curled into a seductive grin.
"Deer! Like Bambi." Anya motioned around to all the trophies on the wall and dimly hoped Bambi's mom wasn't the one above the mantle.
"I thought this was the one with the French people not speaking French." Spike said, as he raised an eyebrow.
"Then I saw the dwarf and got confused." Lefou bristled. "Hey!"
"Not you." Spike pointed to a corner booth, "Talkin' about Doc over there."
The dwarf's eyes went wide and he tried to hide behind his pint.
"That's not right.." Anya looked concerned. Snow White wasn't even one of the movies they'd watched last night.
"AHEM." Gaston obnoxiously cleared his throat, "If you're done stalling..."
Spike loosed a demonic growl, causing even some of the more boisterous fellows in the pub to pale a bit. "Let's do this"
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Willow picked her way carefully down the beach. She was on high alert for any very bad baddies that may have stepped off that big black boat. It soooo didn't fit the rest of the scene. There was a big bunch of rocks and it sounded like a waterfall might be hiding behind. Of course a lot of
other things could be hiding behind it too so she crept along and kept her ears open.
Just as she was going to round the corner she heard a familiar voice. She glanced back at the ship with wide eyes... It couldn't be. Could it?
"Let me test my understandment of the situation." The man hiccuped, and Willow was now sure of who it was. She cautiously peeked over the rocks at him as he continued his oration "Am I to assess that this... fellow." Jack made a waffling gesture with one hand, implying the impish young man hovering nearby was hardly what Capt. Jack Sparrow thought of as manly. "He can fly?"
Ariel, wearing the toga made out of an abandoned ship's sail, nodded emphatically and smiled brightly. Jack was slowly nodding along with her then stopped and shook his head. "No. I don't think that's right." Jack concluded.
"Ah course he can fly." Sebastian tapped three of his feet impatiently, "Pe'haps if you wanna so drunk you'd be getting this fastah."
Jack belched, "If I wanna so drunk I wouldn't be talking to a crab, mate."
Willow giggled. Inadvertently revealing her presence. An angry ball of gold glitter came rushing at her face.
"Hey. Whoa. Easy Tink! I come in peace." The pixie stopped zooming around Willow's head and stared at her with wary confusion.
"Well. Hello." Peter slowly floated over, "Um. You two know each other?" Tinkerbell narrowed her eyes and shook her head quickly from side to side. "Huh." Peter looked stumped for a second then brightened, "But she's heard of you. Hey Tink! I think you're famous." The pixie preened a bit, a smug look on her face and her tiny little hands adjusting the bun in her bright blonde hair. "Anyway, I'm Peter. Peter Pan and this is Neverland. You already know Tinkerbell but this is Jack Sparrow and..."
"Captain. Jack. Sparrow." He said, pushing aside the boy and taking one of Willow's hands into both of his "And might I say? A pleasure meeting
you my sweet." Willow blushed a little in spite of herself but took back her hand and said "Kind of barking up the wrong tree Jack."
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Xander was having a very weird day. First off his Parents hadn't been screaming at each other when he woke up and now he was lost in a forest and oh yeah he was a freaking cartoon. So was the forest but that made a weird sort of sense when you took into account that he was a freaking cartoon.
He had at first thought it was a very weird dream brought on by being subjected to way too many Disney movies in one evening - thanks a lot Dawn - but he wasn't waking up. When he pinched himself it hurt. It also hurt when he tripped over a gnarled old tree root but he was way more freaked out by that tree barking at him to watch where he was going. He had looked at... her... bewildered and took off like a scalded dog when she looked at him and said "Boo!"
As her ran through the forest he had a very strong feeling of being watched. The few creatures he caught sight of seemed to be looking at him with an eerie sort of sentience. Finally an ache in his side caused him to slow to a lumbering, limping walk. He walked and thought to himself this was all very Apocalypse Now.
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Dawn was pissed. Really ticked. She had woken up in a barn and okay ewww but it wasn't so bad because she realized pretty quickly she was in a Disney movie! I mean how cool is that? The joy was short lived when Lady Tremaine discovered her and put her straight to work. Dawn complained but that horrible woman threatened to have the authorities throw Dawn in the darkest of dungeons for
trespassing.
Sheesh.
Where the heck was Cinderella? Isn't this her job? Dawn felt kind of lousy for thinking that.
Whenever she watched the movie she always rooted for Cinderelly to get the heck out of Dodge.
Then again, she never thought she would have to take her place.
Was she being punished? Was Buffy not really sleeping when she had joked with Willow about making life like a Disney movie?
It would be so like her sister to come up with a way to make that NOT fun.
Well! Ha. Ha. Ha. Joke's on her. Dawn threw down the sponge and hitched up the raggedy skirt that Lady Tremaine
had made her change into. She looked around a little and then took off running. She didn't care where she was going.
She was just getting far away from this place.
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