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Velvet
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#2451
Old 07-25-2013, 03:38 PM

Dear substances that intoxicates a person,

I do not like you at all. You have caused too many problems in my life. People ask me why I'm not a party person or why I don't like to drink. Ha, I don't like your kind. You've ruined much of my life and continue to do harm to the delicate stability of a life, of a home, of a relationship that is barely staying together. Who ever invented you is an idiot I could never respect. I really hate the way you have impacted much of my life even though I am not the one to use you. I have before, in a stupid and regrettable part of my past. Fortunately it wasn't for very long. But yet, your influence still hovers in my life, but not through me. I really do not like you.

-Me

Dear...You,

So what now? What is up with you lately? I understand that things are very stressful and I understand that it is bothering you, but when help is literally chasing you down, why are you running? My mother and I have both been actively trying to find jobs for both of us. We have been looking around. But you.. you are barely trying! WHY? It's like you don't really care if we lose everything we have. You can't handle stress very well? I thought that the opportunities that have been presenting themselves to us would help! Three different jobs that we can try for have come up today and yesterday. But what are you doing? You aren't even interested. I do not understand. A friend of my Dad has offered hiring you in construction for 100 dollars a day working only 7 hours and no weekends. You weren't even remotely interested. And then when I found that there is some people looking for farm workers, I thought for sure that would spark your interest because you enjoy outside work and you grew up on a farm. The pay for that was great! And I could do it with you! But something that you actually enjoy doing.. you didn't even care! WHY THE HELL NOT? Why aren't you trying? Why are you just drinking your days away when I've found us work? I barely was able to get you to put in an application somewhere today. I DON'T UNDERSTAND! You keep saying that we are going to lose everything, that if we don't get a job we aren't going to have anything here. Well, thanks to my mother and me we have opportunities at our doorstep, but you aren't interested? Are you wanting us to lose everything? I know that stress is getting to you and all you want to do is run and drink, but you CAN'T!! Today, you have left me alone to have been at your Dad's all morning drinking with him. THAT IS NOT A SOLUTION! The work that my mother and I have found pays good! We could live comfortably! But you aren't trying anymore! Before we got married an you quit your job at Coremark, the very next day you were up and on your feet calling everywhere and found a job within a week and you were stressed out then too, so why now? It's been a few days since you have quit your last job and you just... have chosen to drink more than look or even try for that matter. If you don't care, if you really do not care, then how do you expect us to make it? I cannot be married to someone who would rather be forced to move back in with his own parents than try to keep the home we have made for ourselves. You are 31 years old and you should know better. Yet, me, who just turned 21 is being more reasonable about this? I have told you about these job opportunities and you have shrugged your shoulders to them. Literally. Didn't say a word about them, didn't care. Just drank your little heart away. GROW A PAIR AND STOP RUNNING AWAY AND HIDING BEHIND BEER! I cannot stand it. I am trying. And trying. I tried all day yesterday, looked for jobs, searched online. What did you do? You called one person that you have worked for before. That's it. I was all excited to tell you that there was a job opening at the local Tractor's Supply. No, it isn't much, but there is an opening for a few people and I had applied there in a heartbeat yesterday. What did you do? You beat around the bush, shrugged it off, and FINALLY this morning you applied for a job there. But we both know the pay will be minimum and it will be hard there. Especially if only one of us could get the job, but that isn't saying that either of us will. So, my mother has really been trying to help. She found a job driving those fertilizer trucks around from a family friend that could pull some strings for you! BUT YOU SAID NO! She found a job through another family friend for construction work where you would be making really good money, BUT YOU DIDN'T EVEN CARE! And then I find that someone is looking for farmhands, something that I thought for sure you would love to do and you still DID NOT CARE! What is going on in that head of yours? Perhaps I am being unreasonable too, but while I am trying and trying, you are drinking. And drinking and not caring if we lose it all. We do not have a source of income at the moment. We have no money at all. WHY AREN'T YOU DOING ANYTHING ABOUT IT? I am stressed out too because we have responsibilities, but you don't see me running away from it. No, I am facing it and trying. I have been looking around for odd jobs. Pet sitters, house cleaning, and petty jobs like that making nothing, but at least it would be something. And you aren't doing jack shit about this. Except spending our last bit of money on beer when we need groceries. When we could use foo for the pets. I hate saying this, I really do, but I guess there was a reason a had that miscarriage. Because I would be due in November and by the look of things, we wouldn't even be able to take care of our baby anyway. Everything happens for a reason and I guess I finally understand why we will never see that baby. You can't even keep yourself together long enough when a stressful situation occurs. You need to get your life together, you need to figure out what you are going to do. I know I haven't been much help, I've been waiting on getting a job, but you worked and yes, I understand it was hard on you, but we were making it. And you told me soooo many times that you didn't want help, that you didn't want me working and you could do it yourself. So, I was waiting. Waiting for a job at the Vet's to open up and apply there. But now, I am really trying. And you are giving up. I can't do this without you. And you are turning your back on me on this. It hurts us. It really hurts us. Get yourself together. I know our vows said "For better or worse", but how can I stay with someone who is giving up and not even trying to keep everything we have? If you don't straighten up, what can I do?

-Me

---------- Post added 07-25-2013 at 04:28 PM ----------

Dear You Again,

So, I tried to talk to you about this. Tried to talk to you and what happens? I end up feeling worse and crying. You don't care? You just going to ruin our life by giving up? You're just going to drink until you pass out? You're becoming what I hate. Please don't do this to us. Please don't do this. Please don't cut the fragile strings holding us together. I can't stay with someone who can't take care of themselves. That may be wrong, but how can I be strong enough for the both of us? How can I keep caring when you don't? It isn't easy and I know you have problems, I know you have depression spells, I know you can't stay together that good, but you can't do this. Not to me, not to us. You have gotten to get it together and I am wondering if I need to leave for you to do so. I don't know what else to do.

-Me
__________________

JChanOfTheCan
Gingernuts
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#2452
Old 07-25-2013, 07:57 PM

Dear substances that intoxicate a person,
its been only half an hour since our last encounter, and i already feel like i cant live without you. you brighten my day so! please dont ever leave mee! hats off to the person that invented you! i really have so much respect for him. anyways, ill meet you over by the fridge in a sec, and we will be united once more!<3

-Me

Maria-Minamino
Musician
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#2453
Old 07-26-2013, 09:29 PM

Dear parent who is butthurt that her kids school closed when another one in the same county didn't,

It might be true, as you stated, that the school that didn't close dropped 1 letter grade for the state test scores for this past year. However, if you look at the tradition of scores since 1999, this is the FIRST year the school is not an A School. And the school ONLY dropped to a B. So really, your argument just shows how butt hurt you are.

Now. I understand that you ARE butthurt. I would be too if the school my child went to closed down due to budget cuts. But I would not go and publically denounce the other school that escaped the same fate as your school. In a way, you are denouncing the parents, teachers, and students who worked their ass off for the B grade they received (and if there is one thing I've learned when getting my degree is that sometimes...you just have a BAD day when you take a test. No matter how prepared you are, the kids might have a bad day during the test and so it won't always reflect 100% the best of their work!). In addition, you are denouncing the parents of that community who worked their ass off to save their school. So I see you are butthurt because they didn't fail in saving their school and you did.

But you are denouncing these students and parents and teachers over something they had NO control over. The fact that YOUR school closed has NOTHING to do with them unfortunately. So trying to go on a public forum and brag about how your school was better in test scores (for just this 1 year btw way - in the test scores of previous years - the school that didn't close has had more As than you!) and how the other school deserved to close down, not yours is just ridiculous. You DO know you are making fun of children when you do that, right?

I hate self-righteous parents like you. You think YOUR child is a God Send and any other child is just there to serve. I would have said ALL of this to you but as a teacher in the same county (and a teacher at neither one of the schools mentioned btw so I'm not being biased here)...I would probably get into a load of trouble were I to actually send this message to you as a reply.

I hope I don't end up teaching your kid this year because you would just be one more asshole parent to deal with. Get a life!

Maria

Last edited by Maria-Minamino; 07-26-2013 at 09:32 PM..

Mageling
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#2454
Old 07-29-2013, 10:22 PM

Dear Someone,

I can't count how many times I've wanted to speak up. I almost gather the courage, and then it fails me again. I can't bring myself to say anything, because I don't want to risk ruining the friendship we have. You're the best thing in my life, and I don't want to lose that.

But sometimes I wish it was okay for me to ask for your attention. I wish it was okay for me to say that I feel small and sad and neglected, and not feel so certain that all I would get in reply is a lecture. I know you have a life, and I know most of it doesn't involve me in any way, shape or form, and I try to respect that. If I send you a message and you don't reply, I don't push. If you tell me that you're busy, I leave you be. But a lot of times, you're all I have.

I know that probably says something about me as a person. I know I'm a horrible, needy, selfish person and I'm a difficult person to like. But sometimes I feel like I have to be that way just to get through the week. I have to think about myself, because nobody else seems to have time to do it.

So I sit here, and I wait. I wait for you to have time to talk to me, I wait for you to have time to chat, I wait for you to remember that I'm here, still waiting. Sometimes I hope that if I wait long enough, the bruises on my heart will hurt less. And I'm still waiting.

--Me

Roachi
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#2455
Old 08-03-2013, 05:10 AM

Dear ________,
Wow really. After everything that i've done for you?! My friends have done for you, my family has done for you. I decided not to contact you to see if you would contact me. But no... Not a single text, PM, word to ask how i am.. How my life is going. The only time you respond is when i reach out to you first. You are a selfish person. And you really need to open your eyes to how self centered you are. How over the top you always are, and how judge-mental you are.
Every time you moaned about someone in your life, i wondered if you moaned about me in the same way. You should be happy that you have a partner that loves you and has stuck by you all this time. Even though you are neurotic as. You should be happy that you have gotten everything that you've ever wanted. But it just feels like it's never enough. You take take take. But when it's your time to give, you have a bitch fit about it, or make someone feel really bad about asking for something from you.

I really tried to be a good friend. But it always felt like i was never good enough for you.
I tried to get close to you, but you never let me in. I've always been the person that stood on the outside. Despite the fact that i've been there through all your friends who have dissed you and treated you like crap. I defended you, i was a good friend and took your side every time. Even when i thought you were being a drama queen.

Oh well maybe one day you will wake up. Maybe one day, you will see what a good friend i've been and regret being such a cow. I can only dream right?
You won't be getting any more help from me, i've done more then enough for you.

-- Roachi

Last edited by Roachi; 08-24-2013 at 08:55 AM..

Seridano
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#2456
Old 08-07-2013, 02:35 AM

Dear Self,

Stop mucking up everything you touch!

-Seri

jellyfaylene
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#2457
Old 08-07-2013, 03:16 PM

Dear Peanut Butter,

You knew I needed you. You knew that everything was changing. You knew I lost so many important people, and I depended on you to let me keep someone for once. But you couldn't do that. That one thing I needed more than anything -- to have you, and keep you, and not let us change.

I thought, for the first time in a long time, that we were doing good. That there was hope for us, that we would make it through all the petty things that were holding us back. But you didn't think so, and it took you a long time to let me know. And when I told you how excited I was because we were doing great, and we were figuring things out, and getting back on track with how things were, you left me. You told me you weren't completely committed, you claimed my bed, and you pushed me out of my house.

You knew how much I still cared about you, even after you proved to me how cowardly you were, and you took advantage of me. You used me. And after four years of what I thought was love, you found someone else three weeks later. And still claimed you loved me. You didn't let me see my friends, just because you wanted to spend time with them. You treated me like a child. Like a nobody. Like less than a person. You screamed at me. You became indifferent to me. Then you wanted to act like you cared.

You're a terrible, unreliable person who doesn't deserve happiness. You'll misuse people's trust, you won't commit even when you say you will, and you don't put effort into any relationships you create with people -- whether they're platonic or more. You don't deserve to find someone who will love you, because that was me. And instead of reciprocating those feelings, you dropped me where you stood and never looked back. "It was all your fault," you told me. "You needed too much." People never "need too much" from the people they love. Or those who love them back.

I look back on proms, and our roadtrip, and going to college, and moving into together, and all I want to do is rip your face out of those pictures. How you treated me after you left was unfair, and you don't deserve to be a part of those memories. I'm so disappointed in you. You will never be a man, and you will never truly understand what love should be. And as much as I want to pity you for that, I can't.

Sincerely (every word),
Jelly

The Wandering Poet
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#2458
Old 08-08-2013, 06:22 PM

Dear Job Networking,

How the hell do you work?!? I've been applying to jobs nonstop for like 6 months with 1 interview... what the heck am I doing wrong?

A networkless person,
Poet

CosmicFoxKitty
The Awkward

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#2459
Old 08-14-2013, 02:32 AM

Dear random menewshan,

You know, it kind of really flipping bothers me how you sit there and you constantly complain and whine about how "No one talks to you" or how "People constantly disappear from my threads"... Have you ever thought maybe it's because you are so negative and you think the world only revolves around you? A lot of the people on this site are literally here only to escape from their crappy lives. So step off your high horse and listen to others and be freaking happy for once!!!

Seriously annoyed,
Ashtyn Leigh

CADFND
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#2460
Old 08-14-2013, 11:11 PM

Dear Friend of Days past,

I still think about you even though we haven't talked in ages. I miss you. I wonder how you're doing a lot. I hope you're doing well. I know that you probably forgot about me, but you're still one of my best friends. You're the first best friend I had. I hope that fate will be kind to me and let me step into your life again, or I'll have the courage to do it myself.

-The girl you cheered up from first to fifth grade

Dear girl who shall not be named,

You're not taking away anything from me now. I've felt the happiest I have in years. I haven't been thinking about you too awful much lately. I wonder if this is what it feels like to move on? Well, the process isn't complete because I'm still writing about you even though I promised myself I wouldn't. But hey, you win some you lose some. I have to admit I didn't realize just how much you weighed me down, how bad you are at the things that you say you're good at, and how much you hurt me until now. But you know what? I no longer want to shove you off a cliff. I just want the pleasure of being able to go to Tokyo or Seoul and have to translate for you because you weren't able to learn the language. I would leave soon after (because I would be there with either a group of friends or a client) but that would give me so much pleasure. Because you couldn't take that away from me. I swear to God, I will not slow down and I will get further than you. And I will enjoy my life. And I bet you can't read Hangul. *sticks tongue out*

-The girl who remembers everything

Dear Housemate,

I'm sincerely grateful that you're learning how to let things roll and not take everything personally. It seriously has let my spirits lift. I do think that the therapist you were talking to was kind of on to something, about what you're going to do after I go to college, but I think you're on track to figuring that out. Just please stop freaking out that I kind of want some space. I need a little room to grow.

-The girl with new beginnings

CelesteStar
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#2461
Old 08-19-2013, 10:54 AM

Dear girl who has done me wrong but I just cannot hate,
All of that was an act, right? You threatened to strangle me, put your arms around my throat, and waved a knife in my face. You discouraged me from speaking about what I was most passionate about. Everyone seems convinced when you brag about how sociopathic you are. Do you really want to give sociopaths a bad name? You were so against people labelling mean people as sociopaths, but did you ever think about what you did?

Stop blaming everything on sociopathy. Seriously. It's annoying.

The Wandering Poet
Captain Oblivious

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#2462
Old 08-19-2013, 05:28 PM

To whom it may concern

Hey i haven't met you
And this is crazy
So heres me resume
Hire me maybe

Ugh seriously though id love a job right now...

Sincerely
Still looking

onsenmark
Walküre ga tomaranai!
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#2463
Old 08-23-2013, 04:32 AM

Attention, ex-girlfriend:

Stop it. You're beginning to weird me out. You're going off the deep end, it appears.

fishyfey
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#2464
Old 08-31-2013, 02:54 AM

Dear smoke,
Go away!

Dear mother-in-law (to be),
Why would you say that I'm the daughter you always wanted? We don’t spend time together. I don’t like your cooking. I don’t want to go shopping together. I just want to be left alone.
I should be flattered by your statement, but I'm just baffled. I don't put in any effort for you, why would you like me as a great person?

Dear father-in-law,
I thought you were never getting married again. WTF? Yeah, she is super nice, but... really... I just don't even know what to say.
PS- thanks for saving my butt with the car insurance and replacing my breaks. I would have been in deep trouble if you didn't step in.

Dear husband,
Oh, husband. What do I do with you? I wish you would feel better and stop being so very very ill. On these days when you are so sick and sleep all day, I feel very alone and very sad. I cry when you aren't looking. I drink in the kitchen in secret. It doesn't really help, but sometimes it dulls the worry and the stress you cause me from being so sick. I've been drinking tonight. Vodka. I don't even like the stuff, but it is all we have stashed in the house.
You just asked if I was writing a book. I lied to you and said it was a short story instead of this letter. You are so very supportive and said that made you happy. Thank you for being you.

Dear Princess,
Stop waking up the husband when I am here! You are being a little butt head.

Dear Vodka,
Idk why I drank you. You taste like crap.

Dear Anime,
You are a much better addiction than alcohol. I must continue to consume copious amounts of romantic comedies in order to pretend my problems don't exist.

Dear Kdramas,
Oh what a wonderful new discovery you are! Just the distraction I needed.

Dear Diabetes,
Buzz off. You are cramping my style.

Dear writing group,
Thank you for always being my rock.

Dear BFF,
Thank you for knowing me and not judging me for my insecurities and issues. Thank you for caring about me regardless of my flaws.

Dear dude at work,
Ummmmm... whats going on here? You are turning into my second closest friend. I know that I can tell you anything (even things I can't tell my BFF) and you will care, not judge, and give me an honest opinion. Today I noticed how broad your shoulders are. Ewww, I never look at you that way. Wtf? This is why all my friends are girls. Boys make things complicated. (Even if I'm the only one with an issue. Thats not the point.)

Dear Me,
Why are you writing all this and why are you going to post it???? I have a hunch you will regret this all later.

Nivvy
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#2465
Old 08-31-2013, 08:43 AM

Dear Universe,

HOLY MOLY, I feel like I've been spinning around in circles for days on end! My head is just so full of fuzz at the moment. All I hear in my ears is static. Phewwww... My boss is gonna be sooooo mad. Especially after we agreed, that baby was too young for me to return to work just yet. Now they've got to wait even longer X___x;; Right when things seemed to settle down for us, there's another spanner in the works. Thankfully it's a good spanner, but still. Right when I thought we were on overload, with all the things that seem to tie us up, we've got to free up some more time. I've been going nuts on airbrushing in my spare time, and I've got a long way to go before I feel happy with my work. Now it's going to take a little longer :S Until I'm about 50 lol. I'm struggling, trying to up-skill, and raise a baby without family as it is. So who knows how much more tougher it's going to be, when number two is here.

Barghh, wish I could just spin hay into gold.

PS - Where is my phone?? If I've left it at work, I seriously hope my battery goes flat. Don't want anybody snooping through my contact numbers haha. E would be an absolute nightmare, I can imagine all the random, creepy stuff he'd probably text people from my phone lols.

Mathonwy
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84.24
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#2466
Old 08-31-2013, 01:13 PM

Dear Bank,

The 1950s are over. Not everyone is a housewife able to do her (husband's) banking during your short, limited lobby hours. In the least you could make Saturday a full day. Hell, hire me and I'll work all Saturday myself because I could use a steady job. Financial institutions are some of the most profitable in the world and, in the U.S. at least, you're able to make investments using depositors' money. The least you can do, then, is stay open for your depositors. Thanks.

Yours,
Mathonwy

Nonsensical
Keeper of Keeps
1756.51
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#2467
Old 08-31-2013, 07:49 PM

Dear You,

Hilarious. Fucking hilarious. I've been telling you for, like, two years about that, but you never listened. Now you're all hulking out everywhere. Why so hateful?

From Me

Last edited by Nonsensical; 09-03-2013 at 06:17 PM..

Nivvy
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#2468
Old 09-01-2013, 09:44 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mathonwy View Post
Dear Bank,

The 1950s are over. Not everyone is a housewife able to do her (husband's) banking during your short, limited lobby hours. In the least you could make Saturday a full day. Hell, hire me and I'll work all Saturday myself because I could use a steady job. Financial institutions are some of the most profitable in the world and, in the U.S. at least, you're able to make investments using depositors' money. The least you can do, then, is stay open for your depositors. Thanks.

Yours,
Mathonwy
I'd love to send this to our local bank also X__x;;

The Wandering Poet
Captain Oblivious

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#2469
Old 09-01-2013, 09:27 PM

Dear Heart,

Get back in the corner where you belong.

Sincerely,
Poet

Mageling
Mostly void, partially stars

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#2470
Old 09-02-2013, 01:03 AM

To Somebody I Used To Know:

I realize now that you ruined me.

I was fourteen and lonely, and I let you into my life. You were similar enough to me that we got along well enough. And for two and a half years, the friendship we had was good. And then... it wasn't. You set me aside. I realize now, looking back, that it wasn't as gradual as it seemed. You honestly, truly threw me away when I was no longer worth the trouble, and then tried to turn it back on me and make me believe it was my fault. And you know what? You succeeded. I confronted you about it--the avoidance, the deflections, the exclusions--and you told me you thought I was too stupid to notice I was being cast off. But I did notice, because I wasn't that stupid, and I took to heart that it was my fault, that I wasn't good enough, that you replaced me with something better. And now?

Now I realize that what you did to me has ruined me for any other friendships. Because of you, I'm clingy and insecure. Because of you, I can't look at myself and see someone worth keeping around. And because of you, I'm sitting here barely holding back the agonized screams as I sob and shake and hyperventilate because my best friend in the world went off to Italy and found someone else to hang out with. And instead of being happy that she found a new friend, I'm consumed by a soul-deep terror that I'm going to be thrown away again, like a useless old toy, all because you did it to me back then.

I hope you're happy now.

--Me

Nivvy
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#2471
Old 09-02-2013, 09:58 AM

Dear spectra vondergeist, Frankie, and draculaura,

Seriously, someday you'll be mine! And I'm going to pretty you all up something fierce. Here's hoping this Abby bominable project goes well. Then I'll be buying you three up quick fast <3 I don't think I'd ever sell spectra, because I just love the see through wrists and ankles. The Angelina jolie repaint, on spectra is insanely gorgeous. I'm not even an Angie fan, but wow! You three keep me up at night! I've just got to repaint your faces in my own style :-) I can't wait. Dang that 30% off sale last week, for not having any of you three left, in the basic lines. I'm not gonna buy a spectra at $60 :S I think I've finally found my passion, for channelling some creativity. Its nice to have a hobby that doesn't drive me bonkers, and something I feel happy doing.

I have you three lovely dolls to thank for it. Can't stand the factory face paint, but Andreja's interpretations on monster high dolls just took my breath away. Add in the fact that I get to use these art supplies I've had lying around forever, and an airbrush - you better believe I'm all over that <3

Sun
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#2472
Old 09-02-2013, 01:48 PM

Dear Zoobies,

I damn well deserved that job, and i just got pissed on and treated like crap by you all, like i have for the last four and a half years. You took the others aside and told them to their faces they weren't good enough for the job. But me. What did i get? Nothing. Not a bloody thing at all. No acknowledgement that you'd even read my application whatsoever. No common courtesy did you extend to me, somebody who'd practically been doing the job for four years. You made me feel as though i was so bad an so much of an outsider that i wasn't even good enough for you to say no even in passing. Of all the internal applicants there i should have been given an interview. But no, you stupid lazy idiots decide it's better to let Caz decide who's good enough for the job, and low and behold, she chooses one of her friends. Go to hell, the lot of you.

And what makes me so angry is that i'd still roll over and let you do it again if i had another chance at the job. Also, why does the total inability to read and respect our availability sheets inflict all permanent members of the shop staff?

Dear Parents,

Stop being dicks to Oz. The reason i'm so often sad or in pain when i've seen him is because we're having a difficult time at the moment. You know, the kind that comes from being dissatisfied unemployed university graduates with the pressures of their whole - currently lackluster - futures ahead of them. He doesn't make me sad like that, and it's certainly not his fault i still have periods, okay?

Dear Life.

What was all that crap about how things are going to get better eh? Why does it have to be so utterly slow in the coming?

dessertdesiert
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#2473
Old 09-03-2013, 02:54 PM

Dear brother,

Why do you drink? Why do you have to go out to the bar for a few hours and be drunk for the rest of the night. You really brought it on yourself. You didn't need to spit on the police officer, but you did it anyways, you resisted arrest. Yeah you were drunk, but you are an alcoholic and there is no reason you should go to the bar, I hope you go to prison and get the mental help that you refuse to get yourself.

Your sister aka a bytch

Dear mom,

You did the right thing calling the police, stop regretting it. You are a good mother, stop trying to play the good parent and do what needs to be done. I am also tired of you playing favorites with my brothers because they have a p3nis. I have never done the things that the have and I feel like you don't care about me, so yeah. I might act out, but that is cause you let my brothers get away with it all the time.

I love you, your daughter.

thelettervee
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#2474
Old 09-03-2013, 08:29 PM

Dear 19 year old self,

I know that right now you are feeling alone. I know you keep replaying the betrayel, the rape, and the abandoment over in your head. I know you are driving yourself crazy and you wish you didn't exist, but know that it does get better. your father still will not speak to you, but you will come to terms that you've never needed him especially with the mother you have. You may not think so seeing as though you will move out from a horrible argument you had with her. You will be upset with her and wonder how on earth she could say those things to you...but as soon as you leave and give it time you will have a wonderful relationship with her again. You will always be happy to see her and she will be happy to see you and you will chat the hours away and have inside jokes here and there. you will have failed relationships and make a few mistakes, but it's okay because by this time you will be with a wonderful man. you will be in complete head over heels in love with someone you've always wanted. it'll be a rough start because of the baggage you both carry but in the end it will be beautiful and lasting. we are going on almost a year and a half now. you will not be as close to david, you will still talk to him like old times and at times wonder why it never worked....but the memory of the rape will seep in. you will be bitter, you will be angry for years. you'll wonder how he could possibly blow you off especially after you trying to look pass what he did. just know that he will go away to the other side of the country and the extent of your communication will be facebook. you may feel alone but you are not. you will have friends, you will have a great relationship, you will appreciate family more, you will have new jobs so you can finally quite toys r us, you will feel appreciated and loved. and i'm sorry that it may not be the case now. i'm sorry that you walked into getting your heart broken so many times. but know... that you are wonderful and i love you. we have reached a time where i can say i love myself. this is something i wish you could know now. you will get to a place where you can love yourself.

~with the sincerest of love
Yourself.

~LONGCAT~
is Long

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#2475
Old 09-07-2013, 02:07 PM

front receptionist,
I will f**ing jump over this desk and slam your face into the window next time you bitch and curse infront of a customer. Or the next time you tell them "come back at noon" because that's when you go on lunch and you don't want to do any goddamn work. Do not mother f**ing tell me I don't know what I'm doing or that I'm doing it wrong or that I should be doing something else, you're the incompetent slug who can't figure out that you're crashing the goddamn computers everyday because you can't wait for the slow computers to do their thing. And no "I'm old" isn't an excuse, you received twice as much training because you couldn't get it the first time. I am fed up with your shit and won't deal with it today. I have enough going on with this high priority OPRA request. And I swear to gourds that I will flip this table and jump over the dividing wall and knock your teeth into the back of your throat.

With love,
Longcat

Last edited by ~LONGCAT~; 09-07-2013 at 02:12 PM..

 


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