I am sitting in a pure white room. Light comes from the walls themselves, filling this wretched place with a pale glow. I have explored every inch, every non-existent nook and cranny of this spherical room. There are no windows, no doors, no visible entrances or exits. There is no escape. I can't be sure where the air I breathe is coming from; I can't find any vents or holes. I do know that at least once a day,I'm drugged and put into a false sleep. I guess I'm force fed during this time, as scars on my stomach show years of punctures from feeding tubes. As long as I've been here, I'm sure of this fact.

When I was first brought here I had a name, I had a family, I had friends, I had a life. That's all gone now. Sometimes I wonder if my family has forgotten me? Have my friends moved on? For their sake, I can only hope they have. My name is gone now; I'm not even sure what it was anymore. They stripped me of that aspect the minute I was assigned a number. This number is my only identity now. Tattooed on my wrist: 8351. I wonder if they even remember my name, my abductors. Will they ever call me by it? Would I even recognize it? I wonder if I'll ever have the pleasure of eating food. I wonder if I'll ever experience the feeling of sunlight, the smell of the outdoors. This room only smells of cleanliness and I hate it. I wonder. . . if I'll ever be free again?

I haven't spoken out loud in years; I wonder if I still can. I attempted a word earlier, but no sound came out. I suppose my voice is lost by now. Maybe that's why my captors leave me with paper and a pen. They are undoubtedly aware of the possibilities concerning these two objects. I could just as easily choke myself on this paper as I could fold it in half. I could puncture my throat with this pen, using only as much effort as it takes to write a simple sentence. Maybe that's what they want. This is certainly an experiment. An experiment that presses sanity and human instinct to their breaking points. My sanity is all ready broken, my human instincts are long lost. I shall succumb to their will. This is my resolution, I will not be their play thing any longer. I will not stay alive.

The pen I hold now is the key to my salvation. I'll move these pages as far away from myself as possible. So that they will not be drenched in the blood of my defeated self. As I lay there dying, I hope they will watch. I hope they will see the ultimate and inevitable conclusion to their experiments. I hope they get what they wanted. I remain adamant in my decision, this is my last word.

/end story


Now, before you give me your opinions, let me give you a tiny bit of background information. c: This is my first time attempting anything like that, as in that particular genre. I've never done anything remotely horror before, usually I write short quirky stories. That's also only my second time writing in first person, I usually use third person. Wrote it on August 20th, 2009. During school actually. ;>w> Forget you, Algebra. so, thoughts? Opinions? suggestions for any further stories I might write of this genre? I know it's really short, but I hope I got my point and message, as well as the plot(was there a plot?) of the story across. o:
It's also on my deviantArt: here

I like it! You paint quite a picture :)
Also it made me wonder what was going on.
Like I was really interested in what was going to happen next :)

Thank you. o:
As for what would've happened next, I don't really know. Maybe an escape plan. -if she/he hadn't decided to die of course-
I dunno how I would have pulled that off though.

I’ve always had a fondness for short horror stories. There’s something really powerful about how little it takes to instill fear or pain. On to the read!

--

Originally Posted by Carpe Diem

… filling this wretched room with a pale white glow.

I think this sentence could live without the second ‘white’. Since you already stated that the room was all white the ‘pale glow’ is more powerful on its on.

Originally Posted by Carpe Diem

… is coming from, I can't find any vents or holes.

I’d change the comma to a semi-colon.

Originally Posted by Carpe Diem

I do know that t least once a day, I'm drugged and put into a false sleep.

I think you could drop the comma entirely.

Originally Posted by Carpe Diem

My name is gone now, I'm not even sure what it was anymore.

I’d change the comma to a semi-colon.

Originally Posted by Carpe Diem

Tattooed on my wrist, 8351.

The comma could probably be a colon, but that’s really just a suggestion.

Originally Posted by Carpe Diem

I wonder...if I'll ever be free again?

There should be a space between the ellipses and ‘if’.
--

The story was really very well written. I don’t even have any suggestions to the actual story aspect of it. But I’m little concerned the style of writing, as good as it was, doesn’t really match your subject matter. This person is forced into complete desperation, separated from everything that makes her life, everything that she can define anything by and yet she sounds completely rational and sane, regardless of her statement that she is. I felt that, particularly for a first-person piece, there wasn’t any emotion to go along with her situation. While this complete lack of emotion can usually be enough to serve as an emotion, the situation and her mental state just don’t seem to be in sync.
I didn’t really hear any desperation or insanity in her voice. Just absence. I felt like there should have more thoughts that would help us understand just how insane she’s been made.

But, again, the story as is was really very well written and, like Moonfall said, you do paint quite the picture. I think this definitely deserves a second draft!

I like this, the descriptions are very good. I love the description of the room and I love her thought development as she thinks about the pen and paper.

Originally Posted by Carpe Diem

There are no windows, no doors, no visible entrances or exits, no escape.

This is very good but I feel like it could be stronger. Maybe if you set 'no escape' off in a separate sentence fragment for emphasis. It's just a suggestion, I know some people don't like to do intentional sentence fragments in their writing so it's up to you.

Originally Posted by Carpe Diem

I do know that t least once a day

Just a small mistake but I assume there should be an 'a' before the 't' so it says 'at'.

Thanks for the grammatical fixes. Those semi-colons confuse me. >3>
I never know when to use them.
I'm awfully lazy though and I dunno if I'll ever get around to another draft. However, I'll keep your advice in mind for future stories. :3

I really like the style you wrote this in. It drew me in quickly and I want to know more, it strikes me as a prologue-like section for a larger piece. The only issue I noticed is your second-to-last sentence. It looks like you accidentally added the word "are" while you were typing, so it's not grammatically correct. I couldn't find any major problems though, so I liked it a lot! If you ever did decide to continue along with this idea, I'd be interested in reading it, though it makes a good stand-alone short.

You're definitely on the right track with horror. I enjoyed the story, as it's one of the better short, horror stories I've read. I wish it were longer, though. I would like to have known what the main character had done before suicide, and I'd also like to know how the story was recorded, as it is clear the character itself did not write anything. I find that's an important thing to think about when writing in first person.

@Gidget;
Thank you. >w<

I did include how it was recorded.
"Maybe that's why my captors leave me with paper and a pen."
and
"I'll move these pages as far away from myself as possible."