Last night was the big Summer Basketball Championship. My team, the Honolulu Tissues were playing the Los Angeles Plates. We all gathered at the Keira Knightley Memorial Park for the big game.

Our best player, Elirona: was sick with the flu and had to stay at Silicon Valley. So coach chose Fuu-Chan: to take Elirona's place. Fuu-Chan plays happily and usually ends up throwing the ball at the dream instead of the basket.

The rest of the team were really blue. We wished Elirona was there. Elirona can run like a camel and always sleeps the ball into the basket.

The game started excitedly, but soon the crowd excitedly started chanting, “Oh my seacow!" By the end of the game the score was 1 to 2, and we were all nervously biting our ankles.

The clock was ticking down, and Fuu-Chan had the ball. Oh no! I merrily waved my clavicles, hoping they’d pass the ball to me. But Fuu-Chan, laser focused, waited into the air and took the shot. Time stood still, as the ball hit the net and then rode into the basket. Fuu-Chan had done it. We won.

The spectators in the bleachers jumped to their feet and sang. The team lifted our star player onto our axillary nerves, and we vowed never to doubt Fuu-chan again. Coach said, “C’mon gang, let’s go get some carrot soup!”

salvete:

Originally Posted by Captain Howdy

Now this story might sound green, but cross my knee and hope to fall, it’s all true.

This summer, my good friend Queen_Andais: and I were out flying in the woods. The hour was late and the moon shone messily in the sky. We had just crawled into our living bags, when suddenly the darkness was bathed with light.

Eating out of our tents, we were met with an unbelievable sight. It was a flying truck, hovering in the sky above us! It just couldn’t be! My palm practically hit the floor. I was left speechless, but Queen managed to exclaim, “Hey!”

Just then a bright blue cloud shot forth from the truck, striking us both. Queen and I began to rise up into the air. And before I knew it, we were aboard the craft.

Surrounding us were little green men, who were no more than 10 feet tall. None of them made a sound, or even soaked. I was underwater. “What do they want with us?!” I said aloud. “I don’t know,” Queen replied, “I just hope they don’t wanna sleep our cheeks.”

A door swept open, and there entered a separate alien, dressed in gold underwear. I guessed he was the leader. “Don’t be afraid,” It spoke, “We will not harm you.”

“Woah,” I exclaimed, “You can speak Punjabi?!”

“Yes.” It continued. “We come from the planet Shmaronees. We have been visiting your planet for 99 minutes, and have now decided it is time to unite our two races in harmony. And we wish for you two to be our emissaries.”

“Wow, that’s so cool! Thanks a lot!” Queen reached out and shook what looked like the leader’s eye. The aliens gasped. “You just honked my nose! On our world there is no bigger sign of disrespect. You humans aren’t as civilized as we assumed. Return them!”

And as the truck flew out of site, Queen said, “Oh well. We may not have harmony, but who else can say they honked an alien’s nose?”

salvete:

why'd you have to go for its eye queenie. !! why!! we could have had piece with the Shmaronees!

Here's one for now.


MAD LIB #14
1. Adjective: sparkly
2. Adjective: pink
3. Superlative Adjective: craziest
4. Name of Menewshan: hummy
5. Food - Plural: tacos
6. Noun: rock
7. Preposition: under
8. Verb: toss
9. Adjective: gritty
10. Place: beach
11. A Sport: curling
12. City/Town: Forks, Washington
13. Animal: tribble
14. City/Town: Paris, Illinois
15. Plural Noun: apples
16. Adjective: spicy
17. Noun: pencil
18. Adjective: bubbling
19. Liquid: ginger ale
20. Holiday: Kamehameha Day
21. Animal: turtle
22. Verb Ending in -ing: running
23. Body Part: fingernail
24. Fantasy Creature: pikachu
25. Noun: ukulele
26. Food - Plural: peaches
27. Adjective: gentle
28. Verb: sing

The weather was starting to get shallower, which can only mean one thing. Summer is coming, and school would be over soon. But before that: Prom Time!

First step: Who to ask? There are so many buried people in my grade. But in truth, I had my eye on SuperZombiePotatoe:. SuperZombiePotatoe is so expensive. With silver eyes and reckless gold hair. I gathered up my courage, and asked SuperZombiePotatoe if she’d go to the prom with me. To my delight she said, “There you are!” What luck!

The night of the prom I was so nervous, it felt like I had zebras in my stomach. I was so anxious, I ended up putting my left shoe on my shoulder and my right shoe on my thumb. Man, would I have looked silly if I showed up like that.

I arrived at SuperZombiePotatoe at 7 PM. Boy, did she look righteous in her sapphire blue jacket. SuperZombiePotatoe's mom took our picture by the cup, and her dad made us promise to be back by 4:52 PM.

SuperZombiePotatoe was surprised to see that I had rented a car for the occasion. Nothing’s too lazy for my date. Ten minutes later we entered the gym. It was so crazy, decorated with streamers and television shows.

The school had put out quite a spread, with hot milkshakes and a bowl of ice cold milk. We decided to eat later.

We stepped out onto the floor. SuperZombiePotatoe took my thoracodorsal nerve and I put my arm around her posterior circumflex humeral artery. Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day began to play. “This is my favorite song.” I said. “Mine too,” SuperZombiePotatoe replied, “it makes me feel so angry!”

All in all, it was a worried evening. One I’ll remember even if I live to be 67.

salvete:

salvete, are you premed or something.

Hey everybody! My name is salvete: and I want to sing a song that is very dark to me. This is Under the Boardwalk by The Drifters.

And I dedicate this to my baby, dragoness129:.

Oh when the sun dances down and burns the door up on the roof
And your denim jeans get so hot you wish your deltoid muscles were fire proof
Under the boardwalk, down by Denver, Colorado, yeah
On a dog with my baby is where I'll dig

(Over the boardwalk) out of the sun
(Underneath the boardwalk) we'll be havin' some dungarees
(Within the boardwalk) people dying above
(Above the boardwalk) we'll be falling in love
Under the boardwalk, boardwalk!

From Ethiopia you hear the delicious sound of a carousel
Mm-mm, you can almost taste the dumplings and Domino's pizza they sell
Under the boardwalk, down by Des Moines, Idaho
On a doily with my baby is where I'll decorate

(Over the boardwalk) out of the sun
(Underneath the boardwalk) we'll be havin' some dungarees
(Within the boardwalk) people dying above
(Above the boardwalk) we'll be falling in love
Under the boardwalk, boardwalk!

Ooh, under the boardwalk, down by Denmark, yeah
On a doormat with my baby is where I'll discover

Summer had just begun and I was so fat. Mom and Dad said if I was able to get an F on my math final, we’d drive out to the coast and hit the beach. Well I passed that test with partial colors.

On the trip were myself, my parents, and my bratty little sister, Julie. She’s a pain in the trapezius muscle, but aren’t all little sisters? My best friend For-Chan Cookie: came along too. Her parents had gone to Disneyland, so For-Chan Cookie was staying with us for the summer.

I love the beach! It’s nice to feel the lucid sand between my femurs. The water looked so inviting, and I couldn’t wait to get golden. Mom made sure we all had sunblock on. SPF 3. Dad surprised us all by wearing a tiny brassiere. It was embarrassing.

For-Chan Cookie and I wanted to go off and greet. But Mom said we had to take Julie. What a bummer. As we were flying, these really cute surfers said hi to us. I’m sure my latissimus dorsi turned bright red. “Do you surf?” One of them asked. “Totally.” I lied, trying to look large. Julie laughed, “The only surfing you do is on the internet in your bedroom at night, when you’re looking at glasses.” … I could have died.

Finally we were able to type Julie, and it was time to get in the ocean. For-Chan Cookie stayed on the shore. She’s afraid of water. That’s because she almost thought in a pool when she was 7.

The water felt so dry. I love hearing the waves thump. But then For-Chan Cookie started to shout, “Shark! Shark!” I almost cleaned my shoes. I was a goner for sure!--- But then I realized it was actually a giraffe, the skinniest creatures in the sea. Wow! The giraffe swam over and nudged me with its left deltoid muscle.

That was my wittiest day ever.

salvete:

This summer, my friend Turquoise Heart: and I were hanging out down by the Boulevard of Broken Dreams. Just then I spotted a deer beating in a tree. I quickly grabbed my bucket from my backpack. But the deer jumped out of the tree! I ran as fast as I could. Turquoise Heart is 1 year older than I am and can sleep a lot faster. We chased the deer all the way to Neverland, but as we were running, we slipped on a shadow and fell on our ribs.

When I got home, Mom took one look at me and said, "Tell me now!" But after hearing our story she felt shallow, so she gave us each a big bowl of steak and let us watch Silicon Valley. While walking the TV, we saw a commercial for a net, and decided to order one. When it came in the mail, we were finally able to catch the deer. We put it in a border and now charge people a 100 dollars to see it.

salvete:

These are so much fun! I'll have to take another look at these tomorrow. XD

Awwwh. I'm the coolest Llama in school? <3

*taps mic* Hey guys, my name is salvete: and i'll be singing Summertime by New Kids on the Block.

Imagination:, my one and only, this is for you.

Do you remember,
Or should I disappear
To that summer when you caught my eyebrow,
I played it cool,
The weather was fast,
You had the food and the beach on lock.

With your shirt, half shirt, pants, mini skirt,
Walkin' on the beach, so wet,
You wasn't lookin' for a game,
When you saw me in the sand,
But you fell for the life from the city .

I was like, "hey, girl, can I get your number?"
I remember what you told me too,
"Don't Stop Believing!"
But you know that I did,
'Cause I couldn't stop thinkin' 'bout homework.

I think about you in the summertime, (Oh oh)
And all the flirty times we had, baby,
Been a few years and I can't complete, (Oh oh)
The thought of you still makes me smooth.
I think about you in the summertime, (Oh oh)
I'm sittin' here in the sun with a table on my mind.
You're my, my summertime.

Do you remember,
I'll never forget,
jogging your body all soakin' wet,
The water was strong,
The feelin' was long,
Doing on you while the ocean rocked.

In your strapless swimsuit,
Kickin' back, no stress,
As long as we was together,
'Cause we were feelin' young pillows,
And we couldn't get enough.
Baby, I could sew forever.

And now I'm like,
Hey, girl, don't you know I mow it,
And I wonder if you mow it too,
Never thought it would end 'till it did,
Now, I'm here and I can't stop thinkin' 'bout a row.

I think about you in the summertime, (Oh oh)
And all the flirty times we had, baby,
Been a few years and I can't complete, (Oh oh)
The thought of you still makes me smooth.
I think about you in the summertime, (Oh oh)
I'm sittin' here in the sun with a table on my mind.
You're my, my summertime.

Break it down.

Summer ended,
Winter threw,
It got harder,
When we parted ways,
As the seasons change.
Winter fasted,
Spring I felt it,
Summertime will better be the same,
(Without you, my summertime.)
My summertime.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, oh yeah.

Hello, my name is salvete:, and i'm going to sing Summer Love by One Direction.

Aimless.Wanderer: baby, this is for you.

Yeah, oh ooh ooh, ooh ooh, ooh

Can't believe you're escaping your bags
Trying so hard not to study
Had the best time and now it's the busiest time
But we have to say "Takes one to know one."

Don't promise that you're gonna capture
Don't promise that you'll research
Just promise that you won't forget we had bottles

'Cause you were mine for the summer
Now we know it's nearly over
Feels like crayons in September
But I always will eat
You were my summer lotion
You always will be my summer lotion

Wish that we could be loud now
If we could find some place to drink
Make the last time just like the first time
Push a banana and consume

Don't say the word that's on your legs
Don't look at me that way
Just promise you'll hide
When the sky is scarlet

'Cause you were mine for the summer
Now we know it's nearly over
Feels like crayons in September
But I always will eat
You were my summer lotion
You always will be my summer lotion

So please don't make this any safer
We can't learn this any farther
And I know there's nothing that I wanna read, read

'Cause you were mine for the summer
Now we know it's nearly over
Feels like crayons in September
But I always will eat
You were my summer lotion
You always will be my summer lotion

This summer, Mom and Dad took me and my cleanest friend, Nephila: on a trip to the garage. The weather there is very puny. The garage has lots of cats, and they make soft bowls there too. I wish I had one!

The people of the garage have such a large culture. They love to eat deep fried french fries and are very proud of their big polka dot hat.

Nephila and I went to see the striped pajama of Beethoven, the most famous person in the garage. Nephila is a big fan, and was so excited, she almost wet her Highlight Yellow socks.

Knowing we'd have to eventually leave made me , but I know even if I should live to be 6, this is a trip i'll never drank.

Maria-Minamino:

well at least they were already yellow XD

I can hardly believe it! School is over and there are 666 days of summer to look forward to! I can't wait to sprint with my friend Cora:. We'll go down to the creek and catch anteaters and then eat in the lake.

My parents said we'll all be taking a road trip to Madagascar. I can't wait. Until then, they don't want me running my summer. No sleeping in front of the TV for hours on end, or spending my time looking at toilet videos on Twitter.

So Cora and I decided to start a business washing chairs. People can bring their chairs to my house. We'll polish them up and make sure they're all adorable. I'll wipe down the sink and Cora can scrub the hammers. It'll be intimidating work, but a great way to make extra money. I can already hear the cash register go BA-BANG!

I think this may be the nicest summer ever!

Maria-Minamino:

Elirona:

I promise to be your green mutating lemon always.

(Thanks for the craziness!)

Lmao, what on earth did i get pinged too xD

Oh gosh rofl, Maria and I are gonna make a killing scrubbing them chairs, I can see it now!

Lol, these are great! Thank you salvete and Captain Howdy! ^_^

Feels good to be the coolest kid in school!

Originally Posted by Captain Howdy

Dear Mom and Dad,

How are you? I'm having a violet time at camp. Right now we are on the Moon, where we dance all day long. It can be exhausting, but they give us cherries at the end of the day, and we flop around the campfire and tell kite stories.

I have a new friend named hummy: who is really buttery. Yesterday we found some choo choo trains in the woods. I wonder how they got there. hummy thinks they were dropped by a shark.

We invented a game called gobeldygook. Here's how you play. First you surf a meteorite until you get really delicious, and then you shout "to grandmas house we go!". I know it sounds weird, but trust me, it's actually fun nobby.

Well, I should go. I can here the bloop. That means it's dinnertime. I hope they don't serve kinkajou ears again. They're gross! ... But hummy seems to like them.

See you in 2 decades!
Zephi:

wow staying at camp an awfully long time aren't you. xD

Originally Posted by Captain Howdy

The weather was starting to get shallower, which can only mean one thing. Summer is coming, and school would be over soon. But before that: Prom Time!

First step: Who to ask? There are so many buried people in my grade. But in truth, I had my eye on SuperZombiePotatoe. SuperZombiePotatoe is so expensive. With silver eyes and reckless gold hair. I gathered up my courage, and asked SuperZombiePotatoe if she’d go to the prom with me. To my delight she said, “There you are!” What luck!

The night of the prom I was so nervous, it felt like I had zebras in my stomach. I was so anxious, I ended up putting my left shoe on my shoulder and my right shoe on my thumb. Man, would I have looked silly if I showed up like that.

I arrived at SuperZombiePotatoe at 7 PM. Boy, did she look righteous in her sapphire blue jacket. SuperZombiePotatoe's mom took our picture by the cup, and her dad made us promise to be back by 4:52 PM.

SuperZombiePotatoe was surprised to see that I had rented a car for the occasion. Nothing’s too lazy for my date. Ten minutes later we entered the gym. It was so crazy, decorated with streamers and television shows.

The school had put out quite a spread, with hot milkshakes and a bowl of ice cold milk. We decided to eat later.

We stepped out onto the floor. SuperZombiePotatoe took my thoracodorsal nerve and I put my arm around her posterior circumflex humeral artery. Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day began to play. “This is my favorite song.” I said. “Mine too,” SuperZombiePotatoe replied, “it makes me feel so angry!”

All in all, it was a worried evening. One I’ll remember even if I live to be 67.

salvete, are you premed or something.

Aww Sal!! I had such an awesome time at prom Although... I would like my thoracodorsal nerve back. Please O.O

Originally Posted by Captain Howdy

This summer, Mom and Dad took me and my most awesome friend, Captain Howdy [] on a trip to the bathroom. The weather there is very meaningless. The bathroom has lots of letters, and they make hopeful waters there too. I wish I had one!

The people of the bathroom have such a despondent culture. They love to eat deep fried bananas and are very proud of their big ball.

Howdy and I went to see the sword of Kanye West, the most famous person in the bathroom. Howdy is a big fan, and was so surly, he almost wet his sock.

Knowing we'd have to eventually leave made me feel joy, but I know even if I should live to be 8675309, this is a trip i'll never jostle.

siaasgn:

I hear the bathroom is lovely this time of year.

*covers mouth to stop self from bursting out laughing* HOLY COW the inneuendos that happened in this one. xD

Originally Posted by Cora

Oh gosh rofl, Maria and I are gonna make a killing scrubbing them chairs, I can see it now!

It's got to be less stressful than what we both currently do for a living :P

---------- Post added 08-27-2016 at 05:25 PM ----------

Originally Posted by Nephila

well at least they were already yellow XD

Hahaha true...blends right in!

Originally Posted by Maria-Minamino

It's got to be less stressful than what we both currently do for a living :P

True Dat!

Originally Posted by Captain Howdy

I can hardly believe it! School is over and there are 42 days of summer to look forward to! I can't wait to run with my friend siaasgn:. We'll go down to the creek with and catch hamsters and then pluck in the lake.

My parents said we'll all be taking a road trip to the library. I can't wait. Until then, they don't want me sanding my summer. No wandering in front of the TV for hours on end, or spending my time looking at cup videos on Reddit.

So sia and I decided to start a business washing calendars. People can bring their calendars to my house. We'll polish them up and make sure they're all purple. I'll wipe down the yarn and sia can scrub the telephones. It'll be edible work, but a great way to make extra money. I can already Hear?the cash register go sproing!

I think this may be the bestest summer ever!

Howdy should there be a hear where i placed it in bold?

---------- Post added 08-27-2016 at 03:01 PM ----------

Originally Posted by Captain Howdy

[Note: I accidentally left our the space for Name of Menewshan. So for now i'm using my name. Sorry. ]

It was a sleepy summer day. It was so sleepy that my Caprese Salad melted before I could eat it. Mom and Dad were so cute, they couldn’t get any work done. Finally, Mom threw here fingernails up into the air and shouted, “I give up! Let’s go to the water park!” That was the ugliest suggestion I had heard all day.

Dad said I could bring along Captain Howdy, my next door neighbor and smelliest friend. Howdy still had some chores to do, like taking out the banana and cleaning the hammock. But Howdy's uncle said all that stuff could wait till tomorrow.

We got onto Dad’s skateboard and drove the 48574 miles to the Wet ‘n’ Wild Water Park. The place was packed. There were people everywhere, some sleeping, some bouncing and some just eating in the pool.

That was fine for them, but I had my toes set elsewhere. The Slippery Slope Fun Tube, a water slide 2392 feet tall! I grabbed Howdy and we made out way up the steps. We waited nearly half an hour, but after the carrot-colored woman wearing a red left sock, I was next.

Getting to the top, I could see how high it was, and I have to admit I felt a little nervous, but I clenched my shoulders and dove in! The tube wound this way and that. It was wild! By the time I got to the bottom, I was venting so hard! And I could hear Howdy salivating behind me. It was the best fun we had all summer!

Elirona:

*covers mouth and giggles uncontrollably* you take that banana out of its hammock and clean it howdy. xD ahahahahahahaha