I want to be a teacher but only half what I did at uni will help with that. I can try and get a job as a classroom assistant but I need to get a degree in a national curriculum subject to be a teacher so I'm going to save when I get a job and do a course with the open university so I do it at home in my own time without classes to attend so I can work and get a degree in History. The diploma I got from uni, I was meant to add an extra year on but with my Grandma and the state of that uni I couldn't face it so I got a diploma that says I've complete 2 full years. I can use some of the credits from that diploma on the open university course so It won't take as long for me to get the degree. Then I can do the teacher training and become a teacher. It'll take longer than most people to get there but I'm hoping I can eventually get there.

When I first went to uni I wanted to be an Educational psychologist so I did psychology but the tutors as well as that inclusion module put me off psychology. Besides I think I would probably be more helpful to the kids being a teacher than being the one that labels them. :sweat:

Good morning! How are you today? ^^

I just read through all you wrote and I would wish that I could talk about wedding as well, but we will not got married before we both have finished with uni and got jobs... that will not be before at least four more years... x_x
I started two years ago with uni and have to repeat the 3rd semester this autumn, so I have at least two more years with studying Japanese Studies. Then I'm also studying business economics/management - don't know the exact word in english. But that goes very slow. I have only one test made yet and I'm not sure what I can learn till the first week in october when another bunch of test-dates is. That will take at least four years, but it wouldnt surprise me if I would need five or six years. At the moment it's very difficult to get the hang off it, because two things are too much for me... xD"
My boyfriend studies Physics and Japanese Studies with me. He doesn't need very long for getting Physics finished and he doesn't want to finish Japanese Studies, so he will only need 1,5 years for japanese and I guess one or two years for Physics. But he decided that he wants to make two more years Physic. He will have his master soon and then he wants to get the doctor too. So, I guess he'll need 3-4 years for all in all.
In four years we will both be 27. That's the earliest time we will be able to make more money. Then I guess he wants to wait a while before we got married. But I want to have my first child before I got 30! *laughs*
Well... I'm glad we get enough money already... he gets alimony and I get (half-)orphan's social benefit. So we have enough for living and saving up something for next year when we are planning to fly to Japan. A few months after my dad's death I cheered myself up with getting some kittens and that's what needs the most of my money at the moment.
Well... I would wish live wouldn't cost so much money... I have a stright plan how I want my life to be and that's all just impossible... I want to marry with 28, get my first child with at least 30 and I want to live in a house with garden... but that will never work out the way I want it to be... x_x

Wow, you had it all planned. :XD I'm just going with whatever happens. I'm 22 in 3 months, my birthday is on Friday 13th. :lol:

My mum has been and bought me a load of brownies and my favourite milkshake, she says its because she's been neglecting me since Grandma got sick but honestly Grandma needed her more than I did. She's also said she's going to pay for me and Johnny to have a little holiday in Wales in a few weeks. My Dad has 2 weeks off work after this week, next week will be Grandma's funeral then he's taking her to Wales the week after and they said me and Johnny can go the week after that. Someone has to stay here to look after the kitties, I don't trust my brother with them . :XD

I like to plan my future... it makes fun, but it will never work out the way I want it to be... xD"

Wow... you know what? My father died nearly 3 months before I got 22... o_O

Oh, I guess that means that your mother feels better! She finally calmed down, didn't she?
And holiday will be good for all of you. That distractes a little bit from what happened... =)
I know the problem with kitties! I wouldn't trust my brother as well! xDDD

Wow, that's weird. :XD

She seems ok for a while then just like little things will upset her again. Like yesterday, my dad made a little step because my mum's car was a little too high for Grandma to get in if it was next to the pavement she was all right but on the drive she needed a step, my dad took it apart yesterday and it made her cry and she can't be in my Grandma's house for too long.

She'll probably be upset for a while tomorrow because they're going to the cemetery to find a vacant plot for her. I think (hope) she'll be ok in time.

I just ordered a new tablet it's meant to be guaranteed to be delivered by 1pm tomorrow, my brother broke the old one and I wanted to use it for this picture I'm drawing for my Grandma. My mum said I can put it in the coffin with her, mum is putting my Grandma's little keepsake box in it with her because she's got newspaper cutting of family weddings and things about her first love who got killed in the war.

Sorry, I was out watching Coraline... wasn't as nice as I thought, but the book is great! ^^

Oh, I can imagine the case with the car. My mother had the problem after my dad's death that there were two cars. My father gave her his car before he got too bad, so she could it sell or something and it wouldn't get in the heritage/legacy (what's the difference? x_x).
Well... my brother didn't want to keep my dads car, because of the memories. But my mom kept my dads car, because it's more comfortable and better to drive with more than two people. But it was hard in the beginning for all of us and I remember everytime how my dad used to pick me up from friends with this car...

That will upset her for sure. Can you imagine how it was for my mom to go to the cemetry for getting my fathers urn? For a short time I was afraid that she might break down... x_x

Aww... I think it's a nice thing to give her something with her on the way... I'm sure she would be very happy for your picture and a rose is a good choice. Also the keepsake box with the newspaper cutting sounds like a good idea! That's fine... ^^

Sorry my mum had a bit of a stress out and I had to get my brother round to talk about music and flowers for the funeral

Rose was her favourite flower, she was a florist when my mum was little.

My uncle irritates me so much, he actually excepts us to order HIS flowers for the funeral. He can bloody do one, he couldn't be bothered to not go on a 3 week holiday when his mother was dying and now he's gone for a week to the lake district and just said whatever we want to do for the funeral is fine. He shouldn't be leaving everything up to my mum she's already had to go on anti-depressants for god sake and she's having to ring all these different people and repeat over and over and over that her mum is dead and he doesn't even seem to give a crap he didn't even give my mum a simple tiny hug when he was here but I know he's going to skricking like a damn baby at the funeral. I mean seriously if your baby sister just had to watch your mother die you should at the very least give her a hug.:angry:

Ok, I'm ok I've got that out sorry I'm good now.

Wow, sorry I've been gone. I've been out WalMart shopping, which for me is just wandering around the store, impulse-buying.

It's great that you're thinking of doing a drawing for your Grandma, Jeanie.
But I've never understood the concept of burying treasures with people. If there is something that reminds you of your Grandma, wouldn't you want to keep it around for the memories, instead of burying it with her?

My Mom always wore a Mother's Ring that my brother and I bought for her. It's a ring that has all the birth stones of all the children she had. (Seven stones in it). She always wore it and never took it off. There was no way I was going to have that buried with her. It's on my finger on my right hand now, and that's where it's going to stay. I love having that memory of her every time I look at it.

But again, I realize that everybody is different, and we all deal with grief in our own ways.
Whatever works for you is best.

There's a ring that she loved that my mum is keeping, I didn't even know the box existed until mum brought it home the other day she wants to bury it with her. It's just old newspaper stuff that doesn't really mean anything to anyone but my Grandma, she was supposed to marry this guy but he went to er Normandy(?) in the war, he was a gunner or something and was killed as soon as he landed and then she ended up with my mum's dad.

My mum asked me if there was anything I wanted putting in the coffin with her and I just suddenly had an urge to draw something for her. *shrug* I can't really explain it.

I think it makes mum feel better that things special to Grandma that she's kept all these years stay with her.

Mum was going through my Gran's paperwork to take to the solicitor, she didn't have a will, and she found some drawing my cousin did when he was really little the ones where he gets bs and ds mixed up so it says for granbma. :XD and he spelt his name nial instead of Neil. He's in his 30's now, he was her first grandchild.

Hey... I'm back, but only for short... I'm so tired... that's not a good thing if I want to write something in english...
I think its okay to bury something with her which is only important to her... but something like a ring would be a waste, because that is a big memory of someone... jewelry espacially are good things to keep for the sake of the memory... but things like newspaper cuttings, which mean nothing to anyone but her, they are good for staying with her...
The drawing... well... I would for sure copy it and keep the copy for myself, but it's somehow sweet to bury the drawing with her... that's something very, very personal... I love the idea of it... ^^

I'm going to bed now... I can't think anymore... x_x
Good night and sleep well! =)

I'm doing it on the computer so I'll have a copy. I just need my tablet, it comes in the morning.

Mum gave me a necklace, she said Grandma had told her she bought it because she thought I'd like it and I do. It's a silver celtic love knot pendant. There was also a ring that she told me at Christmas I could have when she was gone, it's got a HUGE blue topaz in it which is my birth stone. My mum also gave me this really nice silver candle holder that has like a lid it's really nice. My Gran had so much jewellery, you'd need like 10 hands and necks to wear it all at the same time. :XD

That's really nice that you'll have some nice jewelry to remember her by. Especially the pieces that you know she intended you to have.

I've been wearing the necklace she gave my for my 21st last year but hiding it under my top in case it upset mum seeing it but I wore the celtic one yesterday and showed her and she said it looked nice on me. I got a little worried that it might upset her but she said it didn't.

The doctor is keeping her on a lower dose of anti-depressants so its enough so she's able to function but not so much that it stops her from being able to grieve. So she's still crying sometimes but most of the time she seems not too bad.

I never realised how much there is to do after someone dies.

I've only been to one funeral before, my mum's freaking out that I don't really have anything to wear. She says I have to go shopping with her for something.

Oh yes, shopping for funeral clothes. I had to do that in early May before we went up north. I knew I'd be needing them on the trip.

The weird thing was shopping for a dress for my Mom to wear in the coffin. She had been at the nursing home for so long, and all she had were blouses and pants... nothing really nice.

There was one nice blouse that she had. Kinda peach colored. They put it on her for Mother's Day. At least 10 times during the course of the day she'd look down at her blouse and say "I don't like this top". (She had dementia with very short-term memory, so she didn't realize that she had told us many times already). What made it so funny was that my sister had been thinking that we'd bury her in that blouse, but after that day, she said we just couldn't.
We were imagining her in her coffin for the rest of eternity going "I don't like this top". lol...

So I had to go looking for something nice for her to wear. Turns out I found the perfect dress and jacket. It was even on sale, which Mom would have appreciated.

My Grandma's niece wants her to be buried in this cardigan thing she bought her, Grandma really liked it she panicked sometimes when my mum brought it home from the hospital for washing and she'd asked the nurses to put it on her and they couldn't find it.

Well, hopefully there won't be any arguments over what she should be wearing.
Everybody has a favorite outfit, I'm sure.

At least in our case, we knew that she had to have something new, that none of her regular clothes would be suitable. Mom wouldn't have wanted everybody to see her in some of those older clothes.

Most of my Grandma's clothes don't fit her any more, she lost loads of weight the last week.

My uncle really doesn't seem like he gives a crap, he just said whatever we want is fine. He's on holiday until almost the day of the funeral (probably, haven't got a date yet but mum wants it early next week) and if he thinks we're ordering his flowers for him he can just do one.

We wanted lots of flowers around Mom, so we told some of our family to send flowers rather than a memorial. It was pretty cool... lots of bright, pretty flowers!

I think mum wanted to do the flowers for Grandma but she' won't have time. they're going to a florist tomorrow between the solicitor and picking a plot. :XD

Our florist did an outstanding job on the flowers.
We showed her the dress and a picture of the casket (it had mauve colors and insets of lilies).

The casket spray was remarkable.

Mum is a little upset, she can't have what she wanted because it would be too expensive. I got my tablet its really cool well I think so, its got some handwriting recognition thing.

I've thought about getting a tablet sometime and do some scribbles.

If I did that, then I'd have to spend some time finding all the sites that you can use to show your work online. Tinypics is the only one I know so far.

I use photobucket for mine. I've finished my picture now. But I've got a tad obssesed with this handwriting thing. I don't need a keyboard. XD

What, you're writing out your posts?

Yep, I think I'm having too much fun with it as well.