Does not mean I have low self- esteem or low body image.

Does this happen to anyone else? You say something like "I'm fat" or whatnot and not in a "omg I'm SOOO ugly" sort of way, and people immediately jump to say you're not/comfort you? It's gotten annoying for me. Let me give you my most recent example.
I just got a new tattoo on my stomach and someone said that they'd be worried about getting one there because if they got pregnant it would stretch, and I made the comment that that is why I got it while I'm fat, because when I get pregnant it won't stretch as much as if I had gotten it while I was my normal weight. Then my friend told me that I wasn't fat and that there were people bigger than me, as if I was saying I was fat compared to other people.
(In reality, I call myself fat right now because, besides being at an unhealthy weight for my height, I gained about 20-30 lb.s just in this state for whatever reason and am at the most I have weighed in my life. I am far above my average and healthy weigh, and it is uncomfortable and I am in the process of trying to lose it.)

Please remember to put quote tags around spoons.

Spoon:
Has anyone done this to you?
Do you jump to tell people their not fat?
Why is calling yourself fat automatically associated with low self-esteem?
Do you find this annoying?
Blah?

Originally Posted by serafim_azriel

Spoon:
Has anyone done this to you?
Do you jump to tell people their not fat?
Why is calling yourself fat automatically associated with low self-esteem?
Do you find this annoying?
Blah?

1. Nope.. but that's because I've been average weight for my height.
2. Often but usually only when I think people are saying it in a negative way
3. Because most people FEEL that they're not pretty when they're not skinny
4. I don't know... I've never been on the other side before... ;)

I've got a bit of a belly, but I wouldn't say I'm fat all the time.
I do say it when I have low self-esteem, though. ._.
I just do that sorta thing.
People will say "no, no, you're not," but it's just annoying when you know it's true.
I don't tell people that they're not fat. I let them think how they want, and I tell 'em how I think... sometimes.
I don't find it directly associated, though, 'cause that's just how I think. >.>
Blah? Yes.

I get some times coz well I am fat. But I also have a low self worth as well. :P I would have to say that is not because I am fat its coz I don't like what sex I was born with.

....Oh well I don't thing my two cents helped any:insane:

I usually feel like I'm fat. And I have a BMI that is slightly over weight for my height. [It was like 26ish and 24ish is the normal BMI I think.] But anyway. Lately, I've been feeling pretty good about myself. I got some nice pants. And my favortie pants are getting too big for me and all that. But I used to have horrible self esteem. Now, I know I'm bigger than alot of the girls at my school, but I feel good about it. Besides, at my school, you are either really fat, or anorexic, and I'm neither, so I"m happy.

My friends always tell me I"m not fat.
I try to make sure my friends know that I love them no matter how big they are, and if they arent fat, I tell them.
These days, skinny is associated with beauty.
I don't really find it annoying. I've kinda stopped complaining.

Has anyone done this to you?

Not really, I'm a recovered anorexic so they're justified in doing it. I have really awful self-image problems and especially since I'm recovered, I'm now an average weight so it's so easy to compare myself to how much I used to weigh and think about how big I've gotten.

Do you jump to tell people they're not fat?

Hurrr grammar nazi I fixed your typo. Um but my friends tend to have just as bad body images as I do (well, none of them are/were anorexic, but nonetheless they have bad body images). So I do jump to tell my friends they're not fat, because they have self-esteem issues and I know they're not digging for complements. But if someone's digging for complements, or alternatively if someone's actually overweight, I try not to outright lie...

Why is calling yourself fat automatically associated with low self-esteem?

Well like I said, I was anorexic so I have this unreasonable phobia of being overweight. For me, I have to work hard all the time to keep from hating myself for being average. There's a voice in my head that says, "Stop eating!! You should be better than just average!!" But I know that's unreasonable. And I like food now >w>;; ...ANYWAY, my point is that I know that at least one or two of my friends, due to crazy parents, have similar mindsets, and so no matter who I'm around I'm always aware that what I say is a potential trigger for anyone who may have an eating disorder I am not aware of.

Do you find this annoying?

Not really. I mean, I definitely understand why it is annoying for you, but like I said I've spoken to so many girls with eating disorders that I think the risk of accidentally triggering a girl with an eating disorder - especially one trying to recover - is worse than annoying someone who actually has self-confidence. Something a lot of people forget is that not all anorexics are skinny! ...it seems obvious once you realize it, but the girls who were overweight and teased and scarred from that are the ones who most often develop these mental conditions, and so no matter what they could be a year from now without help, a lot of anorexics AREN'T sticks.

sorry. slightly off-topic. but there you go.

Spoon:

Has anyone done this to you?

Nope, that haven't.

Do you jump to tell people their not fat?

Not really

Why is calling yourself fat automatically associated with low self-esteem?

Because majority has low self esteem associated with their weight

Do you find this annoying?

Nope

Blah?

Yea, I'm fat. I don't mind it the majority of the time, though. The only time that it gets me down is because I can't find a boyfriend. ;)

But then again, my weight is caused by an edocrine syndrome I have, so it makes me feel better about myself.

I think it's possible that people are overthinking the common-ness of eating disorders, that because some teacher or book somewhere told them that people with eating disorders think they're too fat, that any one that says they're fat (even if it is just stating the truth) is prone to be indanger of hurting themselves.... so they say what they think would be encouraging....

at least that's what I got from my friends when they were doing that to me...

Any time I say anything negative about myself my friend assumes I mean it for real. I joke around with things like that all the time. I'm happy with myself, but that doesn't mean that I'm not going to make fun of myself.

Do you jump to tell people their not fat? The answer is yes
------------------------------------
Because people don't need to hear this to make them more depressed.
I try to say jokingly that I'm going on a diet and sometimes my friends and I do it together
It's more fun that way, so they don't feel left out.

Originally Posted by serafim_azriel

Spoon:
Has anyone done this to you?
Do you jump to tell people their not fat?
Why is calling yourself fat automatically associated with low self-esteem?
Do you find this annoying?
Blah?

1) Told me I'm not fat? Yeeees. Usually people I don't hang out with on a daily basis would do that if I said "I'm fat" around them. They don't know me well enough to know that I say that in a joking way all the time.

2) Only if they're saying it in a way that sounds like they actually believe that. I only do that because I can't stand it when people say they're fat just because they aren't a stick. :roll:

3) Because of the stupid fashion magazines that advertise stick figures as being hot and 'in'. :o Propaganda, I tell you! Hahaha.

4) Mmm. Not really. Well, if people say they're fat all the time, then yeah. I don't find the 'comforting' to be annoying so much. Just the people that are always complaining, "I'm fat. I'm fat. I'm fat. I'm faaaaaaaat." There's a couple girls like that in classes of mine at school, gosh...they drive me insane.

Most fat people are insecure. I would love to tell you what happened this week after a fat guy asked me out, but it really is like a novel. Dating is easy, it's cause and effect. He turned it into some sort of psychological thriller. It makes my head hurt.

In two words, I guess I can say "Too sensitive" but it really just touches on it. And the last two years I've tried to date two other fat guys, with just as neurotic results. It's just insane. I give up, it's exhausting. They can have what they want or expect now in being turned down.

I don't know. Whenever someone says something about being fat when they're obviously not looking for pity (or even when they are and i try to show them that they can't get pity out of me by complaining), I usually try to respond in a way that's really matter-of-fact, like if someone said they got a tattoo on their stomach while they're fat, like the kind of comment you're talking about, i'd just be like "that might be a good idea" and proceed to talk about pregnancies stretching people out or bad places to get tattoos or something. I'd think that even if someone was actually complaining about being fat, it would make them feel bad to be like "OMG you're sooooo not fat."

This happens to me all the time. ._. It really annoys the heck out of me. The last thing that's important to me is what I look like. I think I've proven that when I wore nothing but my PE clothes for most of 7th grade. Just because I don't think I'm pretty doesn't mean I hate myself. It means I'm not pretty. o3o I don't understand why its so important for people to want me to pretend I'm pretty.

I have jumped people for calling themselves fat. But this has only happened with my friends who would only be fat compared to lampposts. ._.;

People have done that to me too, I find it fairly annoying.

I'm over weight just because I state it doesn't mean I don't like myself. I find that I know more thin people who are insecure about their size and remaining thin.

I guess I can understand that they are trying to make you feel better about yourself but some people don't need it.

My boyfriend creature isn't on the slim side, and neither is my sister-like creature. They both call themselves fat and it really bugs me, and I do tell them they're not fat. Because to me they're not. They're not morbidly obese, they're both absolutely beautiful in my opinion, and when they call themselves fat, they're putting themselves down.

When I say that I feel fat, people jump right into action telling me that I'm not fat and that I look so much better than I used to because I'm not skin and bones anymore. They don't even let me finish saying that I feel fat but I know that I'm not. Though my weight isn't 'ideal' for someone my height, I'm not fat, I look good. I have to keep telling myself that I look good. (I absolutely hate how they act like I'm so fragile every time I say I feel fat. No, I don't have very much self-esteem, but I'm not putting myself down, I'm saying how I feel.)

I'm used to being only about a hundred pounds. Right now I'm a hundred and sixteen pounds, and it's not all muscle. This is the most I've weighted in four years, so I feel fat when I look at myself in the mirror. Not because I am, but because I'm not used to seeing myself at a healthy weight, I'm used to being skin and bones.

I'm fat. -shrug-
I have semi low self esteem.
But I don't really care anymore.
If some one says O NO UR NOT
I just say "I am, but thanks."

Has anyone done this to you?

It's kind of like saying "beauty is in the eye of the beholder", I've been average height and average weight all my life and I remember in grade 8 this little boy actually said that I should lose some weight. My friends, including ones that were bigger than me, all went blah blah blah, he's too young, it doesn't mean anything and stuff. I didn't even really care and was about to laugh at the boy, but the way my friends were talking made it worse. It's a long story but I'm just saying I thought the boy said that because he was so little so I probably seemed big to him, but since my friends acted like that, o_o it made me wonder if I was really gaining weight.

Do you jump to tell people their not fat?

Yes, only because they're damn skinny and they complain about being fat.

Why is calling yourself fat automatically associated with low self-esteem?

I'm not sure, but a lot of people are such hypocrites, they automatically tries to comfort you because 'you're suppose to be happy with the way you are'. Then the media, magazines and stuff portrays slim is the best thing, and I'm sure deep down, (especially girls) would love to be slim themselves. More concerned with their image than their health.

Do you find this annoying?

Not really. Just got to live with it, I mean, human values are weird to begin with. In some cultures, fat is considered beautiful. =_='

Blah?

Yea blah, I'm a dress size 4 and I know I'm not fat.
Even so, some people may think I'm really skinny and some may think I'm fat.
So don't feel bad.

Has anyone done this to you?

No, I'm kind of petite. I have gained some weight since I got to college, and realized that I'm a little obsessed with losing it. I'm happy it's nothing that will turn into anorexia or bulimia, but I worry about how I look sometimes. I suck in my gut a lot.

Do you jump to tell people they're not fat?

No. I'm not going to lie to their faces and make things not so... denying won't fix anything. Getting them to admit it themselves means they can start to work on slimming down, etc. I refuse to use the term "fat", though, because it's almost become offensive in our society today! I use "overweight" when I speak of it personally, and "obese" in a general term, like about Americans. And, I mean, some people actually go for that kind of stuff--some people like to have their lover a little pudgy instead of sickly thin. I've heard that way more than once... I wish overweight people could just find people like that who can appreciate that in them and won't pressure them to lose weight, etc. Some people can be so cruel today. When particularly thin people say they are fat, I don't comment at all.

Why is calling yourself fat automatically associated with low self-esteem?

It's not; that's just stereotyping. It's become a general assumption that people who are overweight cannot control themselves, are reckless, and feel bad about it, and thus they have low self-esteem because they don't want other people to know that vulnerability. I mean, that happens to some people, but NOT ALL! It really disappoints me that some people think in this fashion... I know plenty of larger people who are some of the most confident people I've ever seen and beautiful just the way they are.

Do you find this annoying?

Can't you tell? XD

Spoon:
Has anyone done this to you?

Sure .. all the time. I am fat, I know it, have always been over weight and honestly I remain so -because- I find it attractive. I like my extraness. More to love, and I am honest about it. I. Love. my. Belly. *smiles* I love my large arms, legs and softness. I remain at a certain weight, not so I -can't- move, just enough to let people see, I am a big girl and love everything about it.

Do you jump to tell people their not fat?

Heck no, If anything I point out to people -how- thin they are.

Why is calling yourself fat automatically associated with low self-esteem?

People think that if you are not like one of the sheeps, thin and all you know "normal" weight. You have to unhappy with yourself and your life. Honestly, That is one of my main reason -not- to loose my weight. I am BIG and beautiful. I really dislike that people see us ( those that are overweight or cubby) as people that -have- issues or low Self-esteem.

Do you find this annoying?

Ooooh you have no Idea how much.

Blah?

Booo?.. oO;

Has anyone done this to you?

Yess. I don't like it because the people that tell me I'm not fat have not seen my body. On some places on my body, I really see that I'm getting fat. xD Also, whenever I mention working out over the summer, people think that I'm going on some super diet as well. I only want to work out to become fit and healthy. :'D

Do you jump to tell people their not fat?

No. If they believe that they're fat, then I won't interfere. There's always room for self-improvement.

Why is calling yourself fat automatically associated with low self-esteem?

Honestly, I don't know. Maybe because it has been said so many times that the responses become automatic? xD

Do you find this annoying?
Yes. It has happened to me many times. People automatically assume I'm going to binge and become anorexic or something. D: <

Has anyone done this to you?

Ha, yeah, but only people who care about me, like my family, and my boyfriend, and some of my friends. And that's ok. x]

Do you jump to tell people their not fat?

No, not unless I care about them, or I do know they have low self-esteem, OR they aren't fat at all, and they're just being dramatic- like they're perfectly average, or even UNDERweight and they're all "OMG I'm sooooo fat!" :roll:

Why is calling yourself fat automatically associated with low self-esteem?

Because, a lot of people who are fat do have low self-esteem.
I think we, the people who don't have low self-esteem, are more the exception to that rule than the other way around.
I've been overweight all my life, and most of my life I've had low to extremely low self-esteem. I've only recently come out of that, like during this passed year. I'm SO glad I have, because its made my life way better, but that's not really the point. xD

Do you find this annoying?

Well, I mean, if you guys find it annoying, you probably shouldn't really go around saying "I'm fat." all the time. :sweat:
Most people who care about you have a natural reaction to comfort you. :3 And some people who don't even know you might just be, like really compassionate or something. X.x
If that annoys you, don't say it.
I don't usually go around saying I'm fat, unless its like matter-of-fact "Ok I'm thinking about losing some weight now. :3" sounding. I've only said "I'm fat" once in front of my boyfriend, in a tone that sounded like I might have needed to be comforted about it, I think, and I wasn't really even thinking, I just said it, and I was actually saying it to comfort someone else. O.o;
And he comforted me about it, of course. :]
And no, that didn't annoy me, because it wasn't like he was doing it out of pity or something. Haha. I think he'd love me no matter if I was skinny as a twig or bigger than I am. x]

I usually joke about being fat too... to me, it is what I am and therefore its a part of me.

My boyfriend is always quick to say I'm not fat, I'm cuddley and he loves me for me. It annoys me sometimes, despite his kindness, but normally I say it in a joking way and I'm being saracastic!

I hate it when I friends say their fat and their the size of a matchstick. But then again, I guess it's the same thing as me when I say it?

It makes me feel really uncomfortable when people say that they're fat, especially as a joke. I never know what to say. On the one hand, they could be comfortable with themselves even though society doesn't exactly support that. But on the other hand, I've known a lot of people who only feel comfortable bringing up their insecurities through joking. It's really difficult to tell whether they need comforting or expect you to laugh along with them(which I don't think I'd be capable of doing. Obesity isn't really funny to me.). The only reason I can see for making jokes about fat without being insecure is to redefine the meaning of "fat" into something not taboo...but the fact is, it is taboo for me. It's like someone of a different race coming up to me and making fun of themselves by using racial slurs (which would make me really uncomfortable too). I can understand the logic behind it, but that doesn't mean that it's easy to listen to.

And people outright saying "I'm fat" makes me feel uncomfortable too, though not as much as joking about it. I've never met anyone who's stated that they're fat just for the hell of it. Most of the time it's because of low self esteem. Saying it just to say it (without turning it into a joke) is as redundant as me walking up to someone and saying "I have red hair".