Your MAMA'S MAMA AND THE CROSS-EYED MAN THAT CLIPS HER TOENAILS don't compare. :talk2hand:

My grandmother was a saint. :feesh:

Yeah, so was the cross-eyed man that clipped her toenails. :roll:

...He made a mean mimosa the morning after, to say the least. :D

*pokes Facade in the eye*

:roll: Psh, who buys porn?

That's what I'm sayin'!
Facade thinks his Hollywood softcore is worth paying for.

Softcore porn is like driving to Disneyland and then just sitting in the parking lot.

Why bother making the trip?

:rofl: That was simply amazing.

I may have just fallen in love with you. :oops:

;)

...

*posts additional text to prevent spamming* ;D

Estrella is mine. :talk2hand: Sorry, toots, you're not allowed to choose your mate. :talk2hand:
I SHALL BE CHOOSING FOR YOU. :twisted:

...And softcore gay porn doesn't even exist, so I don't think it'd be possible for me to watch softcore porn... :|

I love the wink emoticon on this site.
Not seductive, really, just a friggin goober giving a wink.


Oh my gosh. We should combine the wink emoticon with a thumbs up emoticon. :eager:

@Face ~ Then there's your calling.

Set yourself up in the San Fernando valley and get to filming.

@Estrella ~ I honestly believe Mene has the best emotes i've seen. ;D

Facade: You're crazy. *sucker punch*

Do you know how much tucking that would involve, Howdy!? :gonk:

A cock sock is much more difficult to hide from view as opposed to a snatch patch... :roll:

LOL. Oh my gosh.

Maybe you should turn them into sock puppets. :lol:

...:no:

Sometimes your lack of knowledge of the porn industry worries me, E-Dawg. :(
But I guess this is why Spielberg never called you back after you auditioned for that adult film he's working on... :roll:

Or cut corners even further and use Hot Pockets.

There's gotta be a niche market for that.

I cannot type lately. :\
Or I just keep mixes words up.
I think I'm losing my mind. x__X;

@Facade:

How did you even know about that? :cry:

Cumshots Headshots, Estrella. :lol: They don't lie. :insane:

I'm not sure that I'm ready to cover my body in Hot Pockets, Howdy. :(

I'm no Samantha from Sex and the City; I won't sit on a table covered in sushi for gits and shiggles. :talk2hand:

I hope that squid eats your brains. :stare:

I hope that tacky outfit burns your corneas and renders you incapable of ever disgracing me with your presence AGAIN. :talk2hand:

-stomps into your room and slams the door-

*throws the phone at the door* What a little SNOT. :stare:

HEY! I CAN HEAR YOU! :illgetu:

-sets your stuffed animals and bras on fire-

Oh lawdy, the sexual tension is unbearable!

I don't own stuffed animals. :talk2hand:
And I hardly need a bra.
SO BURN AWAY, FOOLCADE. *throws another phone at the door*