Thread Tools

FortunaStoryteller
⊙ω⊙
91.68
FortunaStoryteller is offline
 
#1
Old 04-26-2009, 03:19 PM

I've been friends with someone for five long and painful years now, the last year of which she's literally dropped off the face of the earth. Yesterday she called me for the first time in months without so much as a 'how are you' and asked me a stupid question and just hung up. I wish I could say this type of behavior isn't typical of her.

Anyway, I want to call her and just formally tell her to fuck off because I don't need this anymore. She broke my heart when I was 15, she's mentally and emotionally abused me, and after yesterday's call, I'm quite honestly sure she doesn't really think too much about me enough for there to be any 'friendship' to salvage.

So what? Should I make a call and ask her to kindly delete me from any and all friend's lists so I can do likewise, send over the package that I owe her and call it a day? Try and get to the bottom of this? I just don't know with her anymore, and I'm far too depressed and suicidal to take much more hurt.

HIM_ROCK
NPC

Penpal
6727.65
HIM_ROCK is offline
 
#2
Old 04-26-2009, 04:56 PM

You're in a tough situtation there but what might be best to do is sort out anything that you owe her or anything that you borrowed from her and give them to her, when you've done that contact her and if she has anything she borrowed from you ask her to sort it out. Then ask her to delete you from friends lists so you can do the same.
That way you could both leave without owing the other anything.

Keary Lumiere
⊙ω⊙
1028.96
Keary Lumiere is offline
 
#3
Old 04-26-2009, 08:49 PM

I know this situation all too well. What HIM_ROCK says is right, but sometimes diffucult, especially in a long friendship as sometimes the other side will not cooperate. You should at least try and see if she'll see reason. The one time that I had the other party not cooperate I weighed the pros and cons of pestering her. I ended up not caring enough to get my things back because I still had things of hers. We just stopped talking and was a mutual "lets just pretend we don't know eachother"

Iltu
do you think pigeons have feelin...
756.20
Iltu is offline
 
#4
Old 04-26-2009, 11:51 PM

Ending friendships, especially long ones, is difficult. :( *hugs* I would say call her up and just flat out tell her: "You don't seem to care about me. It's done for good."

If she grovels, don't let her back into your life. Maybe she'll try to please you at first, but I have a feeling it would tuern into this again. It's certainly not fair to you to have to put up with this. You must always know tyat you deserve good friends who care about you, and a bad friend is one thing that does not deserve a chance to be good again. *hugs once more*

Livia
Dead Account Holder
2123.10
Livia is offline
 
#5
Old 04-27-2009, 06:59 PM

That girl is not good for your life.. From what it sound is the kind that loves to abuse of he other for her own good and happiness...

I think you should back away from her and start a new honest friendship to cover the hole of that empty space.

Arousal
*^_^*
1288.68
Arousal is offline
 
#6
Old 04-28-2009, 01:30 AM

Ending a friendship is done best when you just let it bleed out..
Don't answer her calls, or be really short and polite like you'd be to a stranger.
Don't meet with her and don't spend time together at all when not necessary, eventually it'll just be over.

It's painless at least!

Mystic
(ο・㉨・&...
487.28
Mystic is offline
 
#7
Old 04-28-2009, 04:03 AM

I just went through a similar thing. I just deleted her off all my lists and didn't answer any calls or texts for a while. It was easier than calling her and telling her to fuck off because I've done that before and that didn't work too well. Hopefully everything goes well for you.

AcidDrop
Dead Account Holder
87.91
AcidDrop is offline
 
#8
Old 04-28-2009, 08:52 PM

ditch the bitch.. you don't need her!! shes a pathetic person and doesn't deserve to have a friend like you.. you can find better people to hang out with.. whatever you end up doing you shouldn't feel bad about it because your not in the wrong.. she is!

Phantom Pocky
(-.-)zzZ
997.44
Phantom Pocky is offline
 
#9
Old 04-30-2009, 03:16 AM

Honestly, there have been lots of times that things like this happen. It sounds to me however, that it is the other person that does not want to let go. Though, what I don't recommend is just waiting things out. Personally I think that the easiest way to end a relationship with someone is telling them flat out. Some people think it isn't worth the time to do it, but if giving her that last bit of attention is enough to end things then it should be worth it. Someone who just clings onto another person for the only purpose of using them really can't make a very good friend. About the deleting off the contacts list part. Calling her and asking her wouldn't be my first choice, as I'm not mean like that. I'd block her! xD Even though I'm contradicting myself...I say try calling her and if she refuses then just block her. Don't contact her and maybe she'll get the picture.

Miko Bukake Bath
(-.-)zzZ
Banned
43.18
Miko Bukake Bath is offline
 
#10
Old 05-02-2009, 09:02 PM

I ditched a friend who is nice to me. I got bored with her so I just stopped talking to her and when she called I told my family to say that I was not there. I think she got the message. You should do the same. It is simple...just do not talk to her and she will go away.

Last edited by Rusalka; 05-03-2009 at 04:02 AM.. Reason: removing flob

Yorihiko
⊙ω⊙
275.70
Yorihiko is offline
 
#11
Old 05-04-2009, 09:17 PM

I would break off contact with her at least for a time. Let her know how she's behaving point-blank. "Hey, you've really mistreated me all this time, this is what I have a problem with, and I've finally had enough."

Depending on what she really thinks of you, she may or may not change her ways. But if that's how she's going to treat you, then for your own sake you need to do something different. You are not "mean" for wanting to end it. And if she's worth knowing, she'll realize she messed up. But however many times she reverts to this kind of behavior, I'd tell her you don't want to see her until she can treat you with the respect you deserve.

But I think it shouldn't even have to be said... Those who don't respect you and treat you right aren't really worth knowing. Those that are worth knowing, even if they have problems in that department, will, if they care about you, try to stop it. But it kind of sounds like this girl really doesn't care.

Lady Kezia
⊙ω⊙
256.68
Lady Kezia is offline
 
#12
Old 05-09-2009, 07:03 PM

I say Good Riddance!! I had a friend like that.... They are poison. You're better off without her as a friend.

Roachi
ϟ△⃒⃘

Penpal
1659631.73
Roachi is offline
 
#13
Old 05-10-2009, 12:09 AM

If you feel it's worth salvaging then you should atleast try to talk to her and tell her how your feeling. But if you think that these past 5 years have been nothing but a waste & you could have done without her friendship. Then i'd say it's time to say Goodbye.

MenewshaMan666
⊙ω⊙
0.00
MenewshaMan666 is offline
 
#14
Old 05-10-2009, 01:57 AM

5 years of abuse? Whats to salvage? NOTHING!

If your into getting even hurt her...make her suffer...I makes me feel better. But then again I have no concience XD

But if your too nice to do such a thing then just....stop.....dont talk to her...you dont know her and she doesnt know you....the classic friend-ship ender :P

pinkii
\ (•◡•) /
3103.61
pinkii is offline
 
#15
Old 05-12-2009, 04:52 AM

Personally, I would just avoid all contact with her until she gets the hint and moves on.
She doesn't even deserve a call from you if she's being a total bitch towards your friendship. I just wonder what exactly she has done to you in the past 5 years while you two were still friends.

I had a similar situation happen to me in middle school. My so called "best friend" (of 10 years BY THE WAY) apparently caused the bullying that I had to endure for a full year. She'd tell my bullies all of my secrets and would make fun of me behind my back. I ignored her, as well as her phone calls and texts, until she emailed me concerning our friendship.

From there, I emailed her a letter filled with everything I felt towards her and what she did to me. I even stated that she didn't even deserve a proper 'goodbye' because she never treated me with respect. She took 10 years of our friendship and flushed it down a toilet. That hurt. So, I told her she needed to get over herself and should never contact me, FOR ANYTHING, ever again.

I never looked back since. And honestly, that was the best decision I could ever make.

Last edited by pinkii; 05-12-2009 at 04:55 AM..

 


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 

 
Forum Jump

no new posts