Well, the other day my friend and I had the idea to start a coffee shop, since we live in a town that is completely devoid of any. It seemed a good idea, and immediately we started working on it. Finding buildings, setting up a business plan, etc. It's going to take a fair amount of money and a fair amount of work, and we're willing to put in all of it.

Anyway, I was telling one of my really, really close friends about it, and the first thing they did was shoot me down. They told me how most small businesses fail, how it was going to take more work than I was willing to put in and that they doubted it was going to last more than the first week or two. They told me they supported me despite all that later on, but when it happened it really bugged me. This is one of the people I'm closest to, and this is just about the only time they've ever said anything quite like that.

All I wanted was to get some support from one of the people I care about most. Now, I know that they were just trying to prepare me for the worst, but I had already had a clear picture of what could happen. I know the risks, but I'm still putting my idea and my business forward despite this. I'm too stubborn for otherwise. xD

But is there any way I could calmly communicate I really want their backing on this? I mean, they say they are, but it's a tad obvious they're expecting it to fail. How can I rub off some of my optimism on them?

And before you say they're a bad friend, keep in mind this is a one time sort of thing. They don't do this all the time - or even frequently. In fact, this is the first time they've shot me down like this in all our years of friendship. They're a fantastic friend, and one of the people who I consider the best in the world. They're just a bit pessimistic sometimes.

Hmm... I think you could do it. If there's no coffee shops, I'm sure that people would flock to yours!
I don't really know what to say, just ask them to try and support you, that's all.

Hm... how to communicate to your friend how you feel? It's a bit blunt of me to say this but the direct course is usually the best and the scariest. If there were a way for you to tell your friend everything you just wrote:

I know that they were just trying to prepare me for the worst... I really want their backing on this? I mean, they say they are, but it's a tad obvious they're expecting it to fail.

Another thing you could try is to get the friend involved in the coffee shop somehow. Not financially or anything big at first, but maybe some of the planning or building hunting or something you think would get the friend excited. Like: if a friend wanted to get me interested he or she would ask me what I thought of something like the menu layout because I have an interest in graphic design. So what kinds of interests does your friend have? Anything you could even remotely link to this project?

Unfortunately, the only way that I can think of to get them to support you is when they see that it is working. D: At that point, they'll probably be more willing to be optimistic.

Did you tell them all of the details-plans and stuff? If you didn't, then that would probably help out, too. (Making sure that they know that this isn't just a whim that you're going to definitely throw away money on, but that you've actually thought about it. Tell them why you think it's going to work.)

My aunt is like that.

I'm guessing you would have been happy to hear a "That's a great idea! Good luck!" ?
But instead you were put down.

It's a jealousy thing I'm afraid. Your friend might be peeved that he or she isn't involved, or that you're actually doing something worthwhile, as they struggle to do the same.

Some people just don't like to see others do better than them.

I think if this is a one time type thing, it's unlikely that your friend was trying to make you feel bad. He/she was probably trying to protect you. I'm not saying that you haven't considered all the things you need to consider before you open the shop, but it takes a lot of money to prepare a shop and quite a while to earn it back, let alone make a profit. If you didn't communicate to your friend right away that you understood that and were prepared he/she might have misunderstood and didn't want you to be surprised by the difficulty of opening your own business. Explaining what you're going to do in detail (especially the reassuring parts like the research you've done and the money you have saved and that you don't need to make a profit anytime soon) will probably go a long way to make your friend feel less pessimistic about it. Other than that, I agree with Wordstreamer. Once they see it working, they'll have to feel better about it. I'd try not to take it too personally if your friend normally isn't like this.

Humans are beings of the present, and you must know in your heart that the future is illusive to the human mind. No one can know what will happen until it happens, no matter what is excepted. This is the truth, and is unarguable. Do what you will with it.

I'm just wondering if he is only trying to inject a little bit of realism into it, as you said to 'prepare you for the worst'. Perhaps there's a hint of jealousy however has he or she had any experience with anything similar? Perhaps they know someone who has tried to set up their own business. What also catches my interest is the fact there isn't already something there...perhaps the location of it isn't the best?

I would be wanting to pick his brain even more to get a grasp as to why he feels the way he does and whether or not it is grounded advice...

My advice, unbiased from either point, is to involve them in something like the advertising. Like making signs and stuff. The more creative things.

Just go to them and say 'hey, would you be willing to help make some signs and stuff?'

The more creative and fun things you can involve them in, will make them a bit happier and more excited about it.

im not going to say 'bad friend', but communicate that your feelings were hurt about it.

Sorry i can't offer more help, but a coffee shop is actually more likely to survive than say, a small book/record store. More customers addicted to the stuff and all. :)

Tell them you understand what they are trying to tell you but that you really want this and ask if they have any suggestions. Getting people involved somehow will make them more supportive of what you are doing.

With today's economy, I am sure your friend was just trying to warn you of the dangers, but just didn't come across quite as eloquently as they meant to.

If there are no coffee shops around, that will help you. So would having an interesting theme to your place, something that makes it unique.

A good thing to be on the look out for is locations; if you could get a place near a collage and or near some sort of shopping center where there is usually high foot traffic you will get more people to happen in.

Freebes are always a good hook i have noticed. if you try to introduce a new drink, have little cups available for taste testing.