Well, here it is, my big long rant about the mess I'm in.

So my boyfriend of three and a half years is thinking about leaving me. He thinks the spark is gone. He thinks I'm unmotivated and always negative. And as I see it, it's because the job I am in sucks the happy right out of me. Naturally if you were working somewhere and people made up stuff about you to try to get you fired for just looking at them wrong you'd be unhappy too. Oh, did I mention I cleaned half the house and he is still working on one room? Yeah. Well, if he leave I have to remain in this apartment and pay rent, utilities, and everything on my own. It would add up to about 1k a month and I'm lucky to pull 900. I have no car, grocery store is far away. I'd have no tv, no computer, and no phone. I'd be alone. Completely alone.

To top it all off I have a sprained wrist.

Life IS unfair. I'm sorry this is happening to you :[
To be fair, it's not really fun to be in a relationship with someone who's constantly unhappy even if there's a reason for it. Have you tried looking for a new job, or simply ignoring the comments of your coworkers? Maybe your boyfriend would see things differently if you were a little happier at home, or if you started showing incentive that you were trying to change your current situation. I think if you put in some extra effort, the relationship could be saved. ^^;

But you ultimately can't control if your boyfriend leaves you, so I suggest starting to look into other places you can go in the event something goes wrong. If you can't make the money, are there family members or friends you can go to? If the two of you are on decent terms, you could potentially live together as roommates temporarily until you either find a cheaper apartment or start making more money.

Sorry about your wrist D: That sucks. I hope you feel better soon.

Sorry, but I have to say this:

Sounds like life to me

Yea that country song explains it all.
Fabby is right, you should try looking for a job. The happy concept is your coworkers want to get you fired, so ignore them, and just fake happy through work, by doing that, they might not try so hard to get you fired, then you actually will be a bit happy more. Then that also connects to your boyfriend problem. If he says the spark is gone, than try showing him that is still there, you just got to work to find it, just a bit.
This probably didn't, but hope it helped!

Originally Posted by Enzeru

Well, here it is, my big long rant about the mess I'm in.

So my boyfriend of three and a half years is thinking about leaving me. He thinks the spark is gone. He thinks I'm unmotivated and always negative. And as I see it, it's because the job I am in sucks the happy right out of me. Naturally if you were working somewhere and people made up stuff about you to try to get you fired for just looking at them wrong you'd be unhappy too. Oh, did I mention I cleaned half the house and he is still working on one room? Yeah. Well, if he leave I have to remain in this apartment and pay rent, utilities, and everything on my own. It would add up to about 1k a month and I'm lucky to pull 900. I have no car, grocery store is far away. I'd have no tv, no computer, and no phone. I'd be alone. Completely alone.

To top it all off I have a sprained wrist.

Okay if the reason why he thinks that the spark is gone is because you're unhappy with life then that's retarded.

Even with chronic depressions my boyfriend stays with me, you just have to work through the unhappiness...

but there is a chance that he's really not feeling a spark, that he's out of the "honeymoon" phase(although if you've been dating for 3 years there's a good chance the honeymoon phase ended a long while ago) and he isn't feeling anything and its not that you're unhappy in life...

The best i can suggest is asking him to help you work through whatever issue is behind him saying this, and if he still can't find the spark that you once had after a month or two and he decides to leave you, ask if he could stay and help out while you look for another roommate (i know will be absolutely devastating to even think if this happens and that it may be harder for you if he's still around)

Well i guess i should ask whether or not he was with you when you got the apartment or if he just moved in with you, you may be able to make him feel more obligated to help if he was there from the very beginning...

Listen. If you want to keep him, you're going to have to get over the bad, and try to be happy anyway. Smile to yourself. Don't think as if he's already left you. (If he does, you could always find a roomie.) About the cleaning, boys will be boys. My fiancy sucks at housekeeping, but whenever we argue about shit like that, it always strikes me how useless it is, in the end. Maybe tell him how scared you are that he'll leave, and ask if there isn't something you guys can do (some little tricks) to change the situation you're in for the better?
And remember to smile, even if sucks. Smiling and laughing helps. Just find little things to laugh or smile about, like an escapee dust mote while cleaning or something stupid you hear at work, etc. The silly little things. I am sorry about your sprained wrist, but it will heal! Good luck.

I'm not sure trying to make him stay will do you any good - love is to go through bad times together, and him thinking about leaving you hints on his love not being strong enough. There'll always be good times and hard times, and if you have to worry about him leaving you every time life's not the sunny side up, that will put a lot of unnecessary stress on you.

That's not his fault (it's nobody's fault), one cannot control how much they they care for another person, but it's an indication you might be better off without him. But above all don't cling to him for financial or practical reason!

Instead of concentrating on him you should really put all your energy into doing something about that job situation of yours. You'll have to ask yourself a couple of questions:

• Other than the mobbing, do you enjoy what you're currently doing?
• If yes, is it the work itself you like, or wouldn't you enjoy it as much if you had to do it in a different company?
• If you stopped working there, would you be able to find a different position within a fairly short time?
• If no, would you at least be able to get a completely different kind of job within a fairly short time and would you be a bit more content working in that field if it meant getting away from the mobbing?
• If getting a new job is an option, what keeps you from doing so right now?
• If not, do you feel like talking to your boss would change the situation for better or worse?
• Do you think that there's any other way to fight back, and if yes, what's keeping you from doing so?
• Above all, try to think of all the people you know and for each one ask yourself: Would they be able and willing to help me out, whether be it financially, psychologically or by offering an alternative to your current situation?

If you answer those questions for yourself, you might be able to at least get a vague idea about what you might be able to do in order to no longer let your job suck all the happiness from your life.

Life IS unfair, but you sound very dependent on your BF for the things you have, and that you are scared of being alone. Being alone is nothing to be afraid of. Sometimes you can learn a lot about yourself by being alone. As far as the job is concerned - there are always choices to make for the job situation. Perhaps you should find another one - one you like at least a little bit and one without the drama that your current one seems to have.

Also, do you really want to let your BF's ideas of you (in this case being unmotivated) determine your life? If he's pulling that kind of emotional blackmail on you, you may want to rethink that relationship too.

Good luck.

Well... you know... if he really think that leaving you will be better than sit down, talk and try to solve this than, I'm sorry, but he is a jackass...

Think about this... work sucks the life out of you.. you get home, tired.... does your boyfriend cheers you up? Or even try to? If he does that, than you should maybe force a smile or something, and try to think about good stuff... but if he don't, if he only complains, than you should get a dog... .-. ... sometimes being alone is better than with someone that drags you down...

Life is hard... it IS unfair... but you know what? If it is unfair to you, than maybe is some side of it that is good... thinking that your life sucks and everything goes wrong will only make it worst... get a friend! It's not hard to find friends, and even people that needs someone to char an apartment. And what about family? Asking for help can never be something bad.

I don't know... I think that you really need to consider what is best for YOU... being alone, but with no one complaining when you get at home, tired... or with someone that, for what you said, isn't helping you at all....

Life is unfair its true but sometimes you can change that. sometimes you have to put the ball in your own hands. Tell him how you feel and ask him if its too much to ask for a happy boost every now and again. But really you are a couple you have to work together always, becuase that's what true love is. Helping eachother and keeping each other strong.

If life werent fair, there would be any fun to it.

Though in your cause its different.
If hes leaving simply because he doesnt feel the spark he used to feel before, then talking would be the first step.
If you truly dont wanna loose him, or feel hes a keeper, then try your best and dont let your job ruin how you act or feel.
If theres no case with him, then let him go. Sure Id be tough without him, especially financially, but what other choice would you have? Can´t force someone to stay, and the one will come eventually.

Dont give up.