Introduction and a bit of a rant

Well, hello there! I've always wanted to give this a try, but never really found a community I felt was the right place to place it in. I really hope Mene is this place, since there's a high level of literacy to be found here (good for getting some constructive criticism), yet at the same time it's less of a strict community than most literature hangouts (I find it a bit discouraging to be told that everything I write qualifies as cheap literature - I know that quite well :P).

So, what is it I'm giving a try? Writing a novel in a language that I have an inadequate grasp on and hoping on criticism that will actually help me change that. I know my English will never be perfect, but there's no harm in at least trying to get better, right? And if in the wake I manage to tell a story that's at least a bit entertaining, even better! ;)

And then this is where you (yes, I'm talking to YOU :squee: ) come in. If you're a native speaker (or just very good at English) please point out each and every mistake (or clumsy phrase) you spot in here. Really, even if it's just a minor nuisance, I want to know it - and I even promise I won't bite! ;)

Rules

• If you find a mistake - DON'T keep it! Throw it right back at me!
• Follow Mene's Literature Spot rules (well, obviously).
• Hug the author? :P

What to expect

The storyline is an idea I had quite a while ago but never came around to turn into an actual story. It allows for a multitude of short stories and side plots, so I think it's perfect for an open end project like this.

The theme is... well, I guess it qualifies best for the Urban Fantasy and Contemporary Fairy Tale genres. It will be lighthearted and a bit philosophical most of the time, but might also feature a lot of darker undertones. I lean a lot towards sarcasm and "dry" humour, but also tend to go for outright slapstick comedy at times. So don't blame me if, at times, you'll feel like any moment one of the characters will feature a huge sweat drop or any other manga-like stylistic device.

The characters won't always be overly authentic - don't expect the members of a family that name their children Martha-Theodosia and Edwin-Nicodemus to be perfectly sane. Especially not Aunt Lucinda... ;)
Just be assured that their individual mindsets (and those of other characters that behave a bit... special) is not just a random attempt at being comical, but will be explained during the story.


Table of Contents

Notes

Well then, I will try to keep this post up to date when ever I manage to add a new chapter.

Hope you'll enjoy the reading, and don't forget: Slap those mistakes right back into my face! ;)

Chapter One - Street Dog

Martha-Theodosia Langridge had never been overly consequent when it came to confiding her inner thoughts to that terribly gaudy book she had been given by her crazy - pardon me: extraordinary - aunt on her fifteenth birthday. She didn't like the thought of anybody ever coming upon that flowery thing, ornamented with loads of butterflies that seemingly unintentionally formed the word "Diary" on the front cover, reading all that semi-psychological humbug people tend to conserve within those dreadful things.

Yet at the same time she just simply couldn't bring herself to not use it at all, since she knew for sure that gifts given by Aunt Lucinda where always given with sincere affection, no matter how badly they tended to fit the presentee's taste. It was also the reason Dosy always felt obliged to - at least once a year - wear this atrocious pink-and-green knit jumper she had been gifted by her father's sister, despite all those looks she tended to attract while strolling the streets in that abomination.

So, while she would never have to worry about running out of pages with her diary, it's not like the small book was completely empty, either. For example, there was this one entry a couple of weeks before her twenty third birthday:

~~~ *** ~~~

"(April 13th, Year 7) Dear Aunt Lucy,

So, it's been a while since I've been writing in here, but you know how it goes. Busy with exams and such.

Nico's been pulling off one of his silly acts again. You know how he tends to bring home stray dogs, name them Ben and then literally bribe Mum into taking them in? Ya, that again. I swear one day he'll turn our house into a dog pound, and we'll all be surrounded by barking, slobbering, widdling Bens.

But that's just the tip of the iceberg! Imagine, there's something "special" about todays Ben..."

~~~ *** ~~~

Ben looked up at the young lady who had just turned the corner right before coming to a sudden halt upon spotting him perched on the pavement right in front of his new owner's home. He stared at her, she stared at him, and for a terribly awkward eternity the distant sound of cars was the only background music for this sad scene between the two of them.

Then, with a cough, she adjusted her bag that had begun to slowly slip down her sagged shoulder. "Shoo!" she hissed, throwing Ben a disgusted look. "No loitering in front of our garden. Get lost!"

While he knew perfectly well that in a situation like this it was best to run like hell, this time Ben just tilted his head to return her look with what he hoped where his most adorable puppy dog eyes, before nodding towards the garden behind the blindingly white picket fence. "I can't. I promised my owner to wait for him," he finally replied.

"Your owner?" It was quite obvious that she was either doubting his or her own sanity, and her voice was a bit high-pitched when she repeated: "YOUR OWNER?"

One would think that by now he was used to people reacting to him in this manner, but he still had to force himself into calming his own voice. He didn't like others looking at him like this, it made him feel both guilty and of course very awkward. "My owner, yes. Edwin-Nicodemus Langridge. Very nice boy, he gave me a treat and promised to get me a nice, warm place to sleep from now on."

Exaggeratedly the girl waved her hands about for a while - he surmised that she was somehow groping for words - and then finally settled on pointing her index finger accusingly at his nose. "But you're not a dog!"

Now, that was an interesting conclusion, though for a moment he actually lowered his eyes in order to check whether within the last couple of minutes his body might have decided to suddenly change into something else. No, everything still there, as filthy and tattered as always, but definitely human. "And a good thing that is, I dare say!"