My history teacher spoke to our whole class saying:
The class average for this past test was too high. So I went back in and found ways to deduct more points.

Okay you f***ing crazy lady:
1) That gives you more work to do.
2) Maybe we all tested that well.
3) Most COOL teachers would shrug and say, "Okay. Looks better than all my students failing."
4) That's just mean.
5) I would have PASSED THAT TEST IF you hadn't DONE THAT!!!

P.E.
Mr. Hab is such a creeper. O_O; I swear, we were playing floor hockey and I got his in my stomach because this one bastard decided to show off and fling it in the air, and he comes over and says, "Let me see. Pull your shirt up or I'll do it myself." Seeing as all the girls looked over, I got embarrassed and I refused, so he took a few steps toward me, shook his head and walked away.

It's hilarious though, because our P.E. shorts' tags are WAY off, so some girls who got medium got med-large. We have to do crunches with our legs in the air so they hold their shorts to keep them from falling. One day Rain was holding her shorts and Mr. Hab walked over and kicked her butt and said, "Let go of your shorts," and she goes, "But then everyone'll be able to see my thighs and underwear!" and then he goes, "So what?"

Lmfao.. funniest day ever.

Are you guys ready to hear this? Cuz this is kinda different from most things heard xDDDD

This was in 11th grade and one time I accidentally dropped a pencil during the lecture in Economics Class. The teacher (its a she) then turned around and said, "Alright. Now this time, who is the one who dropped a penis?"

And everyone was laughing there heads off even me xDDD It was soooo hilarious xDDD ahahaha I looooved my Economics class. Its once class I really didn't mind going.

Two things, actually. The first is from My math teacher, Mr. Hatcher (also known by me as Mr. Hatchet, because of his name, and Don Quixote, because of his facial hair) when we were taking notes, he preferred to be able to finish talking and hold a session after for question, but the class insisted on asking questions while he was talking. "Just leave me alone" he said. His blunt honesty was extremely refreshing and it still cracks me up to think about it.

The other thing was English class, with Mister Jeff Hagar, nobody would volunteer an answer for a certain question, so he pointed to a girl and said "You've just been fingered!" It cracks me up to think about that too.

So I was in class doing something on my laptop. The teacher wasn't lecturing or anything she just walked over to me and said the following:
"Oh what an adorable little laptop! What's his name?"
"Clarence" I made up on the spot
"Well, hi Clarence, can I see it?" she said as if she was talking to a dog. It was extremely creepy.

One dude teacher was flirting with me he said something very gross its like it didn't sound gross like but you think about what he say and it is

I was walking down the hall, not going to class and my next period teach, My trig teach was like, " Y'all better get 'ya booooooootiez down the hallz or ima hav 'ta do 'tat for 'ya." everyone was like, O_O "NOOOO WAYYY!!?!?!?!IS HE DRUNK AGAIN????" hahaa this part is funny. one of the girls he said that to reported to the principal that he was sexxually abusing her. lol. if you saw the look on his face, you would think he choked or had a heart attack.

Originally Posted by kid-kokopelli

My history teacher spoke to our whole class saying:
The class average for this past test was too high. So I went back in and found ways to deduct more points.

Good god that would tick me off so much. That just proves that teachers are all about quotas and bureaucracy and NOTHING about kids learning facts and ideas.

I've had several of teachers say really inappropriate sexual things to me, and ironically, none of them were the one I dated. Har-har.

Boy, do I not miss those school days one bit.

lol when we were on field trip at night me, some students, and our guy professor was hanging out and studying with us when his phone rang. One of the guys studying just blurted out, "OOOh, booty call" and our professor got up blushing and left to go answer the call. When he came back we were all laughing, and he just looked indignantly at us and said, "What?!, you don't think I get booty call?". We all almost died laughing, he had a point.

Another thing.
My earth science teacher, Mr. Stamm, has ADD, and he's 34, so he takes it out on his classes, joking with us and messing around.
This one kid named Oleg was asking what fish they had in the precambrian or something, and Mr. Stamm quoted from South Park, "Do you like fishticks (fish dicks)? You must be a gay fish!" And Oleg was like, "Your mom's a gay fish!" and he goes, "That's not what she told me last night!"

Hilarious.

I'll start with my senior AP English teacher

...Some kids were making fun of the way she dressed asking "why do you wear those vests all the time they're really ugly". It was obvious that they were joking but it was also obvious that she was becoming more and more uncomfortable with the constant harassment.

As if it would make things better for her she ripped off her vest and Yelled at the top of her lungs, "IF YOU HAD TITS LIKE THESE YOU WOULD WANT TO COVER THEM WITH SOMETHING TOO!!" So needless to say the entire class died laughing. The kids that were messing with her were on the ground crying and I'm pretty sure no one will ever respect her again...though she was soon promoted to the chair of the English department XD

I have more but I can't think of them off the top of my head

Originally Posted by mortosdersoulstealer

I'll start with my senior AP English teacher

...Some kids were making fun of the way she dressed asking "why do you wear those vests all the time they're really ugly". It was obvious that they were joking but it was also obvious that she was becoming more and more uncomfortable with the constant harassment.

As if it would make things better for her she ripped off her vest and Yelled at the top of her lungs, "IF YOU HAD TITS LIKE THESE YOU WOULD WANT TO COVER THEM WITH SOMETHING TOO!!" So needless to say the entire class died laughing. The kids that were messing with her were on the ground crying and I'm pretty sure no one will ever respect her again...though she was soon promoted to the chair of the English department XD

I have more but I can't think of them off the top of my head

LOL that had me in stitches, so funny =) , but poor woman =(

Grade eleven biology teacher was amazing. Two things I remember was the Christmas Worm (which we dissected before Christmas break!) and:

"Please, please, don't try and sneak outside at night and catch your flowers having sex. I assure you, it's not all that exciting to see."