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Nizhoni
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10-23-2009, 02:15 AM
i have read a few sexual identity forums and it got me thinking, how many people here on menewsha are gay? if you are, what was the hardest part of coming out of the closet? if you are still in the closet, why? (i do not mean that last question to be mean or anything. i just ask out of curiosity.)
my name is nizhoni and i am a proud lesbian. here me roar. :)
the hardest part of coming out of the closet for me was being out in high school. my girlfriend and i were the only gay couple in the school so we got a lot of attention, most of which was unwanted and plain rude. i remember having my government teacher tell me to my face that she was not going to grade my project because of my lifestyle thus failing me. my government teacher of all teachers. she told us our rights yet she tired to take them away from us. she was then fired and my project was graded but to have to go through that... ugh.
another question, what is your stance of gay marriage? personally i am for it (obviously) but i know that i won't be marrying my partner. not because i don't love her because i do, we just decided that we do not need a piece of paper telling us that we are going to be together forever when we are already going to be together.
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Leenalia
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10-23-2009, 02:38 AM
Woot! You roar girl and be proud! =)
My favorite people to associate with are gays and lesbians, mainly because they are so sweet and fun to be around with. I don't what it is about them, but there's just something that they do that straight people cannot compete with in terms of kindness.
I'm sad to hear about your government teacher doing that, it was illegal for her to do it. I'm surprised she decided to risk her job instead of biting her tongue and risking her religious views, if only for alittle bit.
My stance on gay marriage is still the same, all gays and lesbians should have the right to marry. Period.
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Nizhoni
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10-23-2009, 02:48 AM
yay. :)
i was worried that no one was going to comment. thank you.
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My favorite people to associate with are gays and lesbians, mainly because they are so sweet and fun to be around with. I don't what it is about them, but there's just something that they do that straight people cannot compete with in terms of kindness.
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i believe this is like poor people. the poor are more willing to give when they can because they know how hard it can be. we have to put up with a lot of crap, at least where i live. so we try and make up for it in niceness. :)
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Leenalia
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10-23-2009, 03:00 AM
Yeah ^-^
Poor people, (the right kinds) are very generous and humble.
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Ebony Mist
Lurker
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10-23-2009, 03:22 AM
Honestly, I'm not sure what I am anymore. I have loved both genders, but I have never honestly been attracted to either.
On Gay Marriage, I'm pretty certain on where I stand; Marriage should be a union between two people, no matter what their genders. If two people are in love, they should be allowed to express that love.
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peppermintnightmare
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10-23-2009, 05:10 AM
I saw the title of the thread and I thought yup that's me alright! I'm a proud bisexual, but I identify more with the gay side of me because the straight community doesn't seem to be having any problems with discrimination and needing advocates. Also because I like girls a lot. I came out in middle school which was a scary thing because kids can be so cruel at that age. I was really scared of people judging me, but i didn't have too much of a problem. Now I write a big gay blog about LGBT issues and how to solve them (homobloggimus.blogspot.com if you're interested) and volunteer at a center for queer youth.
I think love is love and gender has nothing to do with marriage. It's okay for a pastor to refuse to perform the ceremony if he or she feels uncomfortable. It's not okay for governments to deny people marriage certificates and benefits based on gender.
Whoo that was long. I'm pretty passionate about these kinds of things!
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Lady Luck Infinity
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10-24-2009, 06:06 AM
I'm also bi. Currently happy with my boyfriend but he's bi too so he understands most of the time how I feel. I went to a very LGBT friendly school, it was a lifesaver because if I hadn't seen such lifestyles on an everyday basis I might have become like my parents.
Who to this day don't know that my 'best friend'that I lived with hile her dad was sick was actually my girlfriend. I probably won't tell them because it would be just to much of a shock to them. And I don't want to lose the chance to see my 4 year old baby brother.
As far as gay marriage goes I support it all the way. Lesians or gays deserve the same rights to visit their spouses in the hospitals that straights do. And the tax benifit stuff along with whatever else is needed to be fair about it.
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||Rawr~Suppie||
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10-24-2009, 07:26 AM
I believe people should be able to marry whatever the gender. :yes: I mean, my family is quite colorful, my sister was a lesbian for a while(Now she's bi, or straight, not sure...She's having a baby...with a guy...So I know she is attracted to male people. :sweat: ) so I don't judge. ^w^
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JFKaito
Dead Account Holder
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10-24-2009, 11:18 PM
I'm 18 recently came out as gay to my very catholic very god fearing hick wannabe family, my siblings were well as supportive as they could be given who they are my parents almost now ignore my existance, they make small talk but the bond is definately not there any more... unconditional love my ass
the hardest part was realizing that no matter what, no matter when they'd obviously have to know
its who i am, its a part of me, and i can't change that any more then i can change my eye or hair colour. i could dye it as a temporary fix to hide the truth but can i ever truly change it no. so why bother playing straight and hiding the biggest part of who i am?
my sexuality in a way defines mes because as with every other aspect of my life its part of what makes me who i am
Though i'll admit my now boyfriend of 2 months brendon helped me to realize reguardless of what others think, my parents included... i am worth knowing, am worth loving and that this little tid bit, my sexuality, is barely even a consideration in the grand scheme of things, so yes it was hard, sure it hurt, but i've never been more sure of something being the right choice in my life
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HamletSpamlet
[¬º-°]¬
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10-25-2009, 10:23 AM
I'm moving this to the General Discussion since there isn't really a personal problem to be solved here. :)
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Leenalia
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10-25-2009, 10:51 AM
I'm afraid of coming out to my family. They already think I'm the black sheep of the family -- me giving them bad luck and stuff.
My mom told me that she'd disowned me and kick me out in the streets if I dared to practice Wicca or even try Paganism, and she's not even Christian! >.<
Wicca/Paganism is a religion, imagine if I told her my sexual orientation and lifestyle choice, can you say cut off from the family tree? I can.
Some secrets are better left unsaid.
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Vamien
Life is all about resolve; outco...
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10-25-2009, 12:38 PM
While I don't really find an attraction in either gender though I currently have a boyfriend, I think that if I didn't I'd probably be bi. I wouldn't broadcast it, however, simply because I'm not really interested in being in another partnership.
If this one doesn't work out somehow, then I think I'm done. :P
Having said all that, though, I have no issues with gays whatsoever. One of my very good friends is gay, and he's a real pleasure to be around. It's easy to make him laugh and he's always the little ray of sunshine in the group, no matter how the rest of us feel.
And speaking of myself now, if I were to turn bi I know my mother would support me. She's the most caring, loving and respecting mother I have ever seen, and I know she'll still love me no matter what.
My dad is a different story and would probably disown me, which would be a relief.
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[3P1C_F41L]
(-.-)zzZ
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10-25-2009, 02:35 PM
I agree with Peppermintnightmare. Since when did the "Separation between Church ans State" dissappear? The government has no right to be dabbling in this sort of thing, and neither does your government teacher, Nhizoni. Thats not only unethical and rude, but it goes against the very principles she was trying to teach: Laws and rights.
And about Marriage. I've never really liked organized religion much, thus I like the term "Domestic Partnership" better. ^^; Marriage is a beautiful thing, when its not being soiled by the "Separate" church and state. The two are hyppocrites with egg all over their faces.
Sorry, This sort of thing always just makes me mad. I'm a bi girl, and I had to go through a lot during middle school, as well. In High school, I didn't even tell anybody, because I thought if I could erase that part of myself, maybe I wouldn't get picked on so badly.
...Eh...I think I'll stop talking, now. ^^;;;
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Scarling Zombie
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10-25-2009, 04:45 PM
It's a social norm that a man and woman get married, have sex for babies, then die. Times are changing quickly, and some people don't move as fast as others, so love who you love. Have relations with a toliet seat for all I care, just respect one another. If you're gay and want to get married, respect the people who tell you no, and fight wisely. If you're totally against it, open your mind.
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Brownies Yum
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10-25-2009, 05:08 PM
I'm bisexual, but more onto boys... Is that bisexual, because I like both genders, but I find boys more attractive. I think gay marriage should be a final, YES! I think it's great that gays, lesbians, bisexuals are standing out of the crowd!!! I didn't tell my parents yet, but I've told my best friend and she is fine with it. Just stand out of the crowd!!! I still have a lot to decide in life, so I don't care what gender I date. Even though I've never dated anyone... ANYWAYS---- Yeah, that's it, bye bye~<3
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JFKaito
Dead Account Holder
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10-25-2009, 05:20 PM
i think this is a topic that always will be up for debate until the world comes to its senses, gay, straight, bi, we're all people reguardless. and i think above all else thats what needs to be recognized. alot of society is used to the older generation, the older rules, but eventually the youth of today will all grow up. its our world soon enough and when that time comes... i think we'll see alot of changes, the world has changed and grown alot even just in the past 4 years. big changes are coming still... guess we all just have to wait it out >_> or move to the uk or canada... its legal there :P
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Evaleain
Pink Sugar
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10-27-2009, 07:44 PM
I have no sexuality, i am blank. But i have a boyfriend. I had a girlfriend..im not bisexual but i dunno, oh well!:D
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desertedblade
Lucien
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10-27-2009, 10:30 PM
i'm bi but only had one girlfriend and we are still best friends now. she is now gay, we went out durning those odd years when we didn't know. I don't think I could be with another girl because she was just awesome and I still love her very much. i'm single now but I live in the middle of nowhere so i don't have very many choices until i can get out. I've dated two guys who were great and we still talk but I think it's because I am so easy going and get along well with many people.
the hardest part for me in coming out was telling my mom. My dad and I have always been close so I didn't even worry about it. I'm his little boy and will always be. Mom still has a problem with it but she tolerates it. The only thing I'm not allowed to do is have other people in my room. Because i'm bi, she says that no one can go into my room for fear that I might be sleeping with them under her roof. i respect her for it and, for the most part, keep the sexiness out of my room.
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koneko of the nekos
Koneko-chan
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10-27-2009, 10:33 PM
When I came out as bisexual, similar things happened (with the neither gender allowed). Except I was already moved out, so I just got harassed and accused of sleeping with any and all of my friends just cuz I liked either gender. My MIL and various other in-laws all think/thought I was going to leave my husband for a girl. My family knows that we're swingers, his family does not. I don't see why any of it has to matter if I'm not hurting anyone else and/or forcing my views/opinions/actions on anyone else. *shrugs*
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Sayhn
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10-27-2009, 11:06 PM
all i know is i wouldnt take too kindly to people telling me that my life is wrong just for being in love, so i wont ever to it to someone else. Things like age of consent laws are protective, who in the world is a no gay marriage law protecting? no one.
koneko: that made me lol whats the difference between you leaving him for a girl versus a man? xD just saying, if it happens one day its not just because of your sexual pref or their gender
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Viperish-Path
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10-28-2009, 12:35 AM
I was just going to say... does Bisexual count? But with all the bisexual replies I guess I don't need to ask that. lol
The hardest thing about coming out of the closet was fearing my parents reaction. I was terrified they were going to disown me or something. Luckily, I at least have one parent who is supportive. My dad said, "Well, I don't exactly agree with it, but I'm not going to stop you if it makes you happy." My mother on the other hand, is still to this day in complete denial. I wasn't to worried about the kids in my highschool, most of them suspected as much anyway, though I have no idea how. Did I have "I like girls too!" written on my forhead? Ugh, oh well. xD
I support all forms of marriage (you kind of have to when you're in a Polyamorous relationship and there's no way for three people to all get married, regardless of gender, which sucks.), so of course I support gay marriage, just because a couple is of the same sex, doesn't mean that they cant have the same rights as a straight couple have. Love is love, no matter gender, age, race or anything like that.
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Rupert_Lestrange
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10-28-2009, 12:51 AM
I'm straight, and I also believe in same sex relationships/marriage. I think that all people have the right to be with who they want to be with, and if they want the same rights to marry, then why not. The only reason that they think that same sex marriages aren't considered legit is because there's no child to produce, binding the two couples together, but I also happen to think that that's just a giant load of crap. I'm a woman who might not even be able to have children, but, it's ok to marry my bf because he has a penis, and I have a vag? If that was the case then I shouldn't technicaly have the right to marry either. Not only that, but a lot of men and women get maried out of conveniance, and not love, but that's ok?Bah, thinking about it just makes me cross! >< There's just so many rules that I will never understand.
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Belias
The Drowned
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10-28-2009, 01:52 AM
I'm straight, however, I believe that people no matter their sexual preference should get the same rights (such as marriage). My two best friends are gay, and I know how hard it was for them when they came out. It was really rough, but now it's mellowed out a bit, and nobody really insults them anymore for it, which is great. I just wish people would be more accepting of difference.
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Mystic
(ο・㉨・&...
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10-28-2009, 02:11 AM
I'm gender blind. I don't care what anyone's gender is I date who I want. I didn't really have a hard time "coming out" since I was never really "in the closet" to begin with. As for gay marriage, I think that people should really mind there own and stop treating gays/lesbians like they are second rate citizens.
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JFKaito
Dead Account Holder
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10-28-2009, 03:26 AM
your gender blind so pansexual then? you like people for their minds and don't allow restrictions such as genders?
i've been gayer then a care bear since 12 and just tried my best to hide it, never worked well and yet my family was still shocked when i came out, though i think it was more i'm such a timid soft spoken person half the time with them they just didn't expect it to happen so soon
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