FMA Crack RP

***

This is a PRIVATE RP for Mizuko Jiao and Rin Yokoshima ONLY. The RP is a cracked-out, fan-based storyline, so don't take anything in here seriously. All trespassers will be court-martialed and punished severely. That is all.

---Riza Hawkeye

Characters:

Riza Hawkeye:
When Mustang left Central, Riza was promoted to Major and serves in the Intelligence Department. She continued to serve in the dept. even after Mustang's return. Cool, calm, and collected under any situation, this highly capable woman is secretly feared by her peers for her straight-laced demeanor.

Roy Mustang:
After his return to Central, Mustang quickly climbed the chain of command and has since then been to returned to his rank of Brigadier General. He is a State Alchemist known as the "Flame Alchemist" because of his ability to control fire with alchemy. Beneath his usual playboy facade is a calculating and ambitious man.

Devica "Devi" Nahuel:
Posing as a lieutenant in West City, Devi was forced to work for the homunculi but later betrayed them. A human chimera, she was fused together with a jaguar and is gifted with both agility and the ability to create clawed hands. Although cautious and timid at times, Devi's personality is very cat-like--curious and playful--when she warms up to others.

Jean Havoc:
Still serving in the military as a lieutenant, Jean Havoc is laid back and lacks motivation (although he is surprisingly knowledgeable when it comes to the military). A tragic playboy, he had no luck with the ladies until a certain human chimera came along.

!!!!!

DISCLAIMER: We do not own Fullmetal Alchemist, nor do we own the any of the canon characters or ideas related to it. All rights to characters like Roy Mustang, Riza Hawkeye and Jean Havoc belong to Hiromu Arakawa, creator of FMA.

All rights to Devi belong to Havoc. No touchy! ---Jean Havoc

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Double-Date Military-Style

((RP Start))

It was a crisp, cool autumn day in Central, and the streets were full of people walking, chatting, and generally socializing.

Located in front of a local movie theater, standing beside his date, Roy Mustang fixed his dry gaze on the two opposite him. His brow furrowed and lips turned down in a slight frown as he groaned out the question, "What...the hell are you two doing here?"

"What...the hell are you two doing here?"

"Nice seeing you too, sir," Havoc said dryly, turning away from his date to glance at the general. He was wearing a pair of black dress slacks with suspenders and a white button-up shirt. The sleeves were rolled up to his elbows. He had a black jacket as well, but it was folded neatly over one arm.

Mustang narrowed his gaze at the lieutenant. Looking between Havoc and his date, a familiar face, Roy grumbled something and then looked over to his own date, Riza.

Like the other three, he, too, was dressed fairly proper. He wore a pair of dark grey dress slacks and white button-up shirt topped with a light coat.

Something didn't settle right. He was never one for coincidences.

Riza could all but see the question on Mustang's face- How did this happen? (Although she doubted he would have worded it so nicely.)

"Lt. Havoc mentioned that he was taking his date to this movie so I thought we could go together," she said, giving him a questioning look. "Didn't I say something to you about it earlier?"

"No. You didn't say anything like that!" Mustang replied, a hint of a whine in his voice. This was supposed to be just the two of us, he wanted to say, fighting the urge to pout somewhat.

"No. You didn't say anything like that!"

"Oh, really? Must have slipped my mind," Hawkeye said, the ghost of a smirk upon her lips. As far as she was concerned, Mustang deserved this. She was quite certain that she had told him about the double date.

"Well, let's not stand around out here. The movie's inside," Havoc said in a tightly controlled voice, as if he were trying hard to keep from laughing. Placing a hand on the slope of Devi's back, he started to guide her inside, hoping that she wouldn't think he was being pushy.

"Well, let's not stand around out here. The movie's inside," Havoc said in a tightly controlled voice, as if he were trying hard to keep from laughing. Placing a hand on the slope of Devi's back, he started to guide her inside, hoping that she wouldn't think he was being pushy.

Devi flushed at the feeling of Havoc's hand on her back, unused to such intimate contact...or much other human contact for that matter. She looked up at him, cheeks still tinged with pink, and smiled softly at his lighthearted demeanor. She could tell by his tone that he was already having fun.

"This is exciting, huh? I've never been to a movie before, actually," Devi admitted, smiling sheepishly.

"Oh, really? Must have slipped my mind," Hawkeye said, the ghost of a smirk upon her lips. As far as she was concerned, Mustang deserved this. She was quite certain that she had told him about the double date.

Mustang heaved a sigh and inclined his head, walking beside Riza into the theater. This wasn't what he was hoping for. His plans were coming unraveled.

She looked up at him, cheeks still tinged with pink, and smiled softly at his lighthearted demeanor.

She's smiling... that's a good sign, Havoc thought happily, feeling a swell of confidence. So far, so good.

"This is exciting, huh? I've never been to a movie before, actually," Devi admitted, smiling sheepishly.

"Really?" he said, his brows arched slightly in surprise. "Well, then I'm glad your first movie will be with me." And Hawkeye and Mustang. "I guess I'll have to teach you proper movie protocol. First thing on the list- refreshments," he said, steering her in the direction of the snack counter.

Mustang heaved a sigh and inclined his head, walking beside Riza into the theater. This wasn't what he was hoping for. His plans were coming unraveled.

"Maybe you should start paying better attention to what I have to say," Hawkeye said sternly, before giving him a gentle smile as she wrapped her arms around one of his.

"Really?" he said, his brows arched slightly in surprise. "Well, then I'm glad your first movie will be with me." And Hawkeye and Mustang. "I guess I'll have to teach you proper movie protocol. First thing on the list- refreshments," he said, steering her in the direction of the snack counter.

"Yeah, well, they never really gave me the time off to go to one," she replied, laughing somewhat as she allowed Havoc to direct her in where to go. She gazed at the snack counter in wonder, taking in all the variety of colors and flavors available. "Wow, I never knew there were so many different kinds. Look at them all..."

"Maybe you should start paying better attention to what I have to say," Hawkeye said sternly, before giving him a gentle smile as she wrapped her arms around one of his.

His expression lightened as he noticed her smile, realizing that she was teasing him in her own way. He let out another, softer, sigh and replied, "I think I've learned my lesson, but..."

Walking up beside Havoc and Devi, Mustang looked over at the other couple and groaned, "Do we really have to do this? I mean, are you guys sure you want to see this movie...or any movie at all for that matter?"

His frown turned into a sliver of a smirk as he added, "Wouldn't you two feel more comfortable going to a zoo or something...?"

"Yeah, well, they never really gave me the time off to go to one," she replied

"Oh... uh, right," Havoc said awkwardly, his expression darkening slightly. That had been tactless.

"Wow, I never knew there were so many different kinds. Look at them all..."

"Yep, and you can have whatever you want," he told her, although he already had his sights set on a box of gummi bears... and the popcorn... "I'm buying."

"Do we really have to do this? I mean, are you guys sure you want to see this movie...or any movie at all for that matter?"

"No, sir, we just bought the tickets so we could stare at them," Havoc replied sarcastically, glancing back at Mustang and Hawkeye, the corners of his lips upturned in a slight grin.

"Wouldn't you two feel more comfortable going to a zoo or something...?"

Havoc turned back to Devi, leaning down slightly to whisper in her ear. "I won't have a problem with it if you decide to slap him..."

"Yep, and you can have whatever you want," he told her, although he already had his sights set on a box of gummi bears... and the popcorn... "I'm buying."

"Um...well, I don't really know what to get," Devi replied, flushing in embarrassment of her inexperience. She smiled sweetly and continued, "How about you choose?"

"No, sir, we just bought the tickets so we could stare at them," Havoc replied sarcastically, glancing back at Mustang and Hawkeye, the corners of his lips upturned in a slight grin.

Mustang's eye narrowed as he glared at the lieutenant. Always such a smart-ass, he thought begrudgingly. So much for a date with just the two of us...

Havoc turned back to Devi, leaning down slightly to whisper in her ear. "I won't have a problem with it if you decide to slap him..."

Devi merely smiled at Havoc and rested a hand on his arm, whispering in return, "Now, Havoc, violence never solves anything...although..."

Looking over at Mustang, Devi feigned an angelic smile and replied sweetly, "Sorry, we're not interested in the zoo, but they might be interested in you. I hear they're looking for a domestic ass to put on exhibit."

"How about you choose?"

"All right," Havoc said, smiling at her in what he hoped was a charming way. He stepped forward, ordering several boxes of gummi bears, a large bucket of popcorn, and two sodas.

Looking over at Mustang, Devi feigned an angelic smile and replied sweetly, "Sorry, we're not interested in the zoo, but they might be interested in you. I hear they're looking for a domestic ass to put on exhibit."

Havoc and Hawkeye wore looks of surprise that mirrored one another. Neither had ever heard Devi say something so brazen. Hawkeye stayed silent, though, feeling that the slight against her... second nature was rather uncalled for, while Havoc trembled slightly as he attempted to control his laughter.

He turned away quickly to pay for the snacks. Once the transaction was complete, he turned back toward the others, arms laden with snacks, and said with as straight a face as he could manage, "Let's go find our seats."

Looking over at Mustang, Devi feigned an angelic smile and replied sweetly, "Sorry, we're not interested in the zoo, but they might be interested in you. I hear they're looking for a domestic ass to put on exhibit."

Mustang stared at the female chimera, momentarily dumbfounded by her moxie, before glaring somewhat. He observed the other's reactions and frowned. Unable to find a suiting retort, he opted for a grunt and shrugged his shoulders.

He turned away quickly to pay for the snacks. Once the transaction was complete, he turned back toward the others, arms laden with snacks, and said with as straight a face as he could manage, "Let's go find our seats."

Devi looked at Havoc's arms, loaded with sweets and snacks, with wide eyes. She followed behind him and, tugging on his sleeve, she looked up at him and inquired, "Um...Is there anything I can do? Would you like me to carry anything?"

Unable to find a suiting retort, he opted for a grunt and shrugged his shoulders.

"Do you want to get anything, Roy?" Hawkeye asked, patting his arm reassuringly before nodding toward the snack counter.

"Um...Is there anything I can do? Would you like me to carry anything?"

"Oh... sure!" Havoc replied, a sheepish grin crossing his face. "Could you take the drinks?"

"Do you want to get anything, Roy?" Hawkeye asked, patting his arm reassuringly before nodding toward the snack counter.

Roy snapped out of his despondent moping and mentally kicked himself. He was so distracted with the disgruntling fact that Havoc and Devi were present that he had nearly neglected his responsibility as Riza's date.

He looked to Riza, a warm smile crossing his features as he inclined his head and replied, "I should be asking you that. What can I get for you?"

"Oh... sure!" Havoc replied, a sheepish grin crossing his face. "Could you take the drinks?"

Devi quickly plucked the drinks from his encumbered arms, happy that she could be of assistance. She looked up at Jean and flashed a pleasant smile, taking the place at his side. Eyeing the snacks in his arms, she giggled and asked, "That sure is a lot. Do you really think we can eat all of this?"

He looked to Riza, a warm smile crossing his features as he inclined his head and replied, "I should be asking you that. What can I get for you?"

Riza inclined her head thoughtfully for a second before speaking. "I think I'll save my appetite for dinner," she replied, ever the practical woman. "Although I wouldn't mind something to drink. Those cups look rather large though... maybe we could share?" She didn't mention that she thought the concession prices were ridiculous.

"That sure is a lot. Do you really think we can eat all of this?"

"Of course!" Havoc replied with a grin, pausing to rearrange the treats more securely in his arms before continuing. "Besides, if we don't eat them now, we can always eat them later."

Riza inclined her head thoughtfully for a second before speaking. "I think I'll save my appetite for dinner," she replied, ever the practical woman. "Although I wouldn't mind something to drink. Those cups look rather large though... maybe we could share?" She didn't mention that she thought the concession prices were ridiculous.

"Ah, of course. Good idea," Mustang replied with a smile, secretly cringing as he thought about dinner. He looked at the snack counter and continued, "Sharing a drink is fine with me. Although...I think I could go for something small, too. Maybe some gum...yeah, that will do."

He stepped up to the counter and ordered a pack of gum balls and a single drink, making sure to grab two straws. After paying, Mustang turned back to Hawkeye and extended his arm for her to grab hold of.

Smiling in his suave, charming manner, he inquired, "Shall we?"

((Ugh...I nearly vomitted writing that *points to last sentence* DX))

"Of course!" Havoc replied with a grin, pausing to rearrange the treats more securely in his arms before continuing. "Besides, if we don't eat them now, we can always eat them later."

"Good point," Devi replied, moving the drinks to one arm. She hesitantly reached up and grabbed hold of some of the fabric on his sleeve, figuring that his arms were a bit too full to hold. Acting as if she had done nothing, she continued to walk alongside him into the theater.

((You could have played Hawkeye... but you make such a good Mustang. XDXD))

Smiling in his suave, charming manner, he inquired, "Shall we?"

Hawkeye nodded, smiling coyly at Mustang as she took his proffered arm, although she was trying hard to keep her usual calm and collected demeanor in place. She could take out an enemy without batting an eye, yet at this moment she felt more unsettled than she ever had. I really shouldn't... the general and I have been together for a long time.

"Good point," Devi replied, moving the drinks to one arm. She hesitantly reached up and grabbed hold of some of the fabric on his sleeve, figuring that his arms were a bit too full to hold. Acting as if she had done nothing, she continued to walk alongside him into the theater.

Havoc wished that he wasn't holding anything. Still, he was pleased with her attempt to hold his arm. It was kind of cute.

There were only two screens in this particular movie house, so it wasn't hard to find which theatre they were going to. Pausing outside the door, the lieutenant glanced back toward Mustang and Hawkeye, waiting up for them to catch up.

Hawkeye nodded, smiling coyly at Mustang as she took his proffered arm, although she was trying hard to keep her usual calm and collected demeanor in place. She could take out an enemy without batting an eye, yet at this moment she felt more unsettled than she ever had. I really shouldn't... the general and I have been together for a long time.

Although Riza was trying to remain calm and collected, Roy knew the Major well enough to know that she wasn't. If he didn't know better, he could have thought she was uncomfortable around him, but he took her uneasiness with a bit of pride. He fought the urge to smile, flattered that he had such an effect on her.

As they reached the door theater's screen, Mustang noticed the couple waiting for them and groaned. Walking up to them, he sighed irritably and complained, "Don't tell me we're sitting together, too..."

There were only two screens in this particular movie house, so it wasn't hard to find which theatre they were going to. Pausing outside the door, the lieutenant glanced back toward Mustang and Hawkeye, waiting up for them to catch up.

Devi stopped and waited alongside Havoc for Mustang and Hawkeye to arrive, although she wasn't very happy about it. She had nothing against Riza in the least and could easily get along with the stern woman, but her date was another question. Between snide remarks regarding her genes and his typical pompous behavior, the idea of sharing a date with the man was unpleasant. But it was somewhat apparent that Havoc and Hawkeye had planned this on, and she wasn't about to disappoint them.

"Don't tell me we're sitting together, too..."

"That's kind of the point of a double date, chief," Havoc told him, feeling rather amused by Mustang's apparent irritation. He turned slightly, nudging the door open with his shoulder, and entered.

The theatre was still lit as the movie had yet to start and, to Havoc's relative surprise, it was nearly empty. "Oh, man... I don't think we're going to be able to find anywhere to sit," he said to Devi, managing to keep his face expressionless.

"That's kind of the point of a double date, chief," Havoc told him, feeling rather amused by Mustang's apparent irritation. He turned slightly, nudging the door open with his shoulder, and entered.

"I know that," Roy growled, in no mood for smart remarks. "I was hoping you'd change your mind. After all, a normal man would want to be alone with his woman. Unless," he paused, smirking, "you wouldn't be nervous, would you, Lieutenant?"

The theatre was still lit as the movie had yet to start and, to Havoc's relative surprise, it was nearly empty. "Oh, man... I don't think we're going to be able to find anywhere to sit," he said to Devi, managing to keep his face expressionless.

Devi, on the other hand, couldn't refrain from snickering at the comment. She smirked playfully and replied, "Oh, no. Look at all of these people! Whatever shall we do?"

"you wouldn't be nervous, would you, Lieutenant?"

"Hey, this wasn't my idea," Havoc replied, looking surprised to have been accused of such a thing. Without meaning to, his gaze drifted over to rest on Hawkeye.

She raised an eyebrow slightly. "Are you implying something, Lt. Havoc?" she asked in her usual sharp tone, her brown eyes narrowing.

"Um... no," he told her quickly, somehow managing not to cringe under the major's stern gaze.

She smirked playfully and replied, "Oh, no. Look at all of these people! Whatever shall we do?"

"We could start a fire," Havoc told her in the same serious tone, giving Mustang a pointed look.

"Hey, this wasn't my idea," Havoc replied, looking surprised to have been accused of such a thing. Without meaning to, his gaze drifted over to rest on Hawkeye.

She raised an eyebrow slightly. "Are you implying something, Lt. Havoc?" she asked in her usual sharp tone, her brown eyes narrowing.

"Um... no," he told her quickly, somehow managing not to cringe under the major's stern gaze.

A smirk tugged on Roy's lips. He was not oblivious to Havoc's insinuation, but he had no intention of calling Riza out on it. It was an entertaining thought, though, that she would be so nervous about their date.

Sighing, he decided not to voice his distaste for the double-date any further as to not upset Hawkeye. Roy shifted his arm slightly to get Riza's attention, smiling down at her reassuringly.

"We could start a fire," Havoc told her in the same serious tone, giving Mustang a pointed look.

Devi laughed and glanced over at the general as well, trying to hide her smirk. She then nudged Havoc gently in the side, raising a brow while faking a pout, replying, "Knowing him, he'd set the whole place on fire and have to leave. Then what would we do?"


"Just shut up and choose a spot," Mustang grunted, rolling his eyes. Then, sending them a meaningful look, he added, "Unless you two want to be used as kindling."

"Knowing him, he'd set the whole place on fire and have to leave. Then what would we do?"

"Yeah, and he'd probably get away with it too," Havoc told her in a low voice, his serious expression melting into an easy grin.

"Just shut up and choose a spot," Mustang grunted, rolling his eyes. Then, sending them a meaningful look, he added, "Unless you two want to be used as kindling."

Havoc paused, glancing back at Mustang, an eyebrow raised slightly. "You brought your gloves with you on a date?" he asked incredulously, stepping aside to allow Devi to move down the aisle that he had chosen to sit in. It was about mid-way up the row of seats in the theatre.

"Yeah, and he'd probably get away with it too," Havoc told her in a low voice, his serious expression melting into an easy grin.

"You're probably right," Devi agreed, narrowing her gaze accusingly at Mustang before smiling back at Havoc. She passed him, slowly stepping into the aisle and stopping midway through, waiting for the others.

"You brought your gloves with you on a date?"

"A soldier should always be prepared, even at a time of leisure, Lieutenant," Mustang replied in a haughty manner, the tone he used while on duty. He then looked at Havoc and nodded for him to follow Devi down the aisle.