First off, Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there.

Today, I read a little bit of the history behind Mother's Day.
The lady who creoated Mother's Day and her daughter spent their lives fighting the holiday they created. Why? Because it ended up being for people to make money. Flowers, chocolate, cards, cameras, phones, etc. At one point, her daughter actually threatened to get rid of the holiday.

So, do you think there should no longer be Mother's Day?

I think Mother's Day should stay, because I never get my mom something, I do stuff for her. She says she'd rather me clean the kitchen than get her flowers.

I don't think there should be a Mother's Day, a Father's Day, or a Valentine's Day. Not everybody has a mother, a father, or a lover. I was abused and neglected for 12 years before my mother disowned me, so mother's day is just a painful reminder of my past. I know many people (through a support group) who have suffered through similar things and I don't think it's right to have a holiday like this because it's not just one or two people suffering over their painful memories due to the holiday being a reminder, it's a large percentage of the WORLD.

Most of the popular holidays exist purely for the purpose of generating revenue. Unless you're wanting to ban all holidays, the argument to ban Mother's Day in particular purely on the basis of commercialism holds no water.

Eh, I buy cards for the ladies who raised me and I spend time with them, but that's about it. Otherwise, I think it's a pretty pointless holiday. You should be nice to your mum every day.

I don't think it's a big deal that companies benefit from holidays. Everything we do makes money for someone.

Like, going to the grocery store and buying food to eat. Should we all stop eating? Because it benefits the fast food places, grocery stores, and farmers, who buy and stock food. We should all take a stand and stop eating food!

We should get rid of all entertainment in this case as well. Entertainment takes so much of our money. Way more than holidays. And it's not like we need computers, televisions, books, etc. We can do without them and we need those evil giant companies to stop sucking the money out of us! Get rid of it all.

Oh and banks. Don't even get me started. We should stop getting loans for houses or having bank accounts. In fact, we need to start stuffing all our money into our mattresses. They make too much off of us with fees and things. It's such a waste.

Everything about our lives is about giving money to companies and making money in return. Money is how we trade with others and we all work hard to make it in any way we can.

It doesn't take away the feelings of the holiday. Whether you spend money or not during it, your feelings can be just as deep.

Holidays have always, always been about spending money. Before there was even companies at all, back in medieval times and things, people spent all the money they could buying nice things on holidays. Because it's a time for people to spoil themselves or others and just enjoy life and be happy. Nothing wrong with that. It should bring joy, not anger.

Originally Posted by Cue

I don't think there should be a Mother's Day, a Father's Day, or a Valentine's Day. Not everybody has a mother, a father, or a lover. I was abused and neglected for 12 years before my mother disowned me, so mother's day is just a painful reminder of my past. I know many people (through a support group) who have suffered through similar things and I don't think it's right to have a holiday like this because it's not just one or two people suffering over their painful memories due to the holiday being a reminder, it's a large percentage of the WORLD.

First of all, I'm sorry for your bad experiences. No one should have to go through that kind of pain or have that kind of past, BUT . . . .

Should we really ban all holidays that are painful or offensive to people? Because then we'll get NO holidays. After all, this very board has another thread in it where everyone discusses how many people find Halloween offensive for religious reasons. Should it be banned then?

Oh and what about all the people who don't have families and therefore hate Christmas and Thanksgiving because they are all alone? Should we ban those, too?

I don't drink and the only relationship I've had is long distance, so I've never had someone to kiss at midnight on New Years Eve. Can we ban that holiday, too?

Birthdays hold very painful memories for me as well. Can I demand that no one EVER celebrates their birthday again?

And there's a lot of alcoholics in the world who probably suffer during Mardi Gras and Saint Patrick's Day. We should get rid of those, too, right?

I don't think bad experiences mean that we should demand for everyone else to suffer and not enjoy themselves. You might be a mother, too, someday, and therefore Mother's Day can change into something you enjoy. Besides, you can make it a celebration instead of anyone in your life who has ever acted like a mother or female role model to you, like a grandmother or just an older woman who was a good friend, if you have any. Or just a celebration of the fact that you've gotten so far without the help of your mother.

I'm not making light of your experiences. Trust me, my Mom beat me, too, growing up, although her and I get along well now (we just had a really bad past) and she never disowned me. But you don't have to celebrate the holiday.

It was a sore spot to me for a long time that I had never had a boyfriend, but I never demanded that Valentine's Day stop existing. I'd just ignore it or try to make the most of it by spoiling myself with chocolate.

It's not the holidays that are hurting you. It's your Mother that hurt you and the fact that you still need to work on that pain (which is much, much easier said than done.)

My Mom beat me partly because her own Mom beat her and she told me that one of the hardest things in the world to her was seeing Mother's doing stuff with their daughters, like going shopping together and stuff. It doesn't mean those things should stop existing or that those people are out to hurt you. It was her Mother who hurt her, not the other people.

And you're right, a lot of people DON'T have mothers in the world, which is what makes Mothers day all the more important because those of us who do have loving Mothers shouldn't be taking that for granted, not even for a second and Mother's Day reminds us of that. I think you know how important not taking that for granted is more than anyone.

So yea, I'm glad you have a support group who can help you get through those things. It sounds like you're really doing well for yourself after everything you've been through and I hope your bad experiences turn into blessings as you cope with them and grow stronger through them.

People also buy things for the people they love on Christmas. It's not just about making money, it's about making the people you love happy. If these things didn't make people smile, no one would buy them.

I completely agree with The Enchanted Tiara. The world will never be happy even if we get rid of every holiday ever known.

I like holidays. They give me something to look forward to when days get bleak and monotonous. I tell my mom I love her everyday, and I always do nice things for her, but on mothers day, me and my siblings try extra hard not to fight cause we know she hates playing referee. We don't mean to upset her, but my sister is 25, my brother 23 and I'm 18. There are a lot of opinion differences, so we just pay extra attention to back out of a fight before it starts.

I'm not really close to my dad, and thats because we share no common ground, but on fathers day, (If my dads home [he's a truck driver]) we spend all day watching our favorite movies and eating popcorn. It's just a way for us to connect when we really have no other way to.

So no, I don't want to loose holidays. Sure I'm against the commercialism of holidays, but I can't deny that warm fuzzy feeling on Christmas morning opening brightly wrapped presents, sticking bows in my hair and listening to Christmas music. That feeling that these people care. Or that sugary sweet feeling on Valentines, when I would buy myself a big box of chocolates and a couple of lilies, to remind myself that I love me.... Then I got a boyfriend who spoils me ^.^ Or there's that creepy, somethings-going-to-get-me on Halloween, when everyone's dressed up and you just go out and have a good time doing whatever. You work yourself up on a sugar high and you watch creepy movies, and reach out to touch your best friend on the shoulder just to see them jump.


Holidays don't need to be cliche' to enjoy them. You don't need to go out and buy something expensive, or do something out of the ordinary. But it just helps relieve the stress of life.

I don't buy many gifts really. Personally I think the holidays should totally exist, because we always need more appreciation for the people around us. I just think you need to realize that the holidays don't have to be commercial. I appreciate my mother on mother's day, but I rarely get her a gift. Simple as that.

My family and I are really awful at holidays. We just never get round to them. xD

It's actually something I've thought about a lot. Well, not about getting rid of the holidays, because they're usually fun and give people something to look forward to in a year, but about peoples' attitudes to them.
For example, there's this big contrast between my friend's family and mine. She saves up all year, working at the bakery (we're fifteen, so that's not as easy as it sounds) and when it comes to the holidays, she splashes out and spends an enourmous amount of money on her family, buying them jewelery and jackets and stuff like that. And then she asks me what I got my mother on, say, Easter, and I'll think... "it was Easter?" and it's obvious I just don't have a clue. She thinks that our family is cold and unfestive, and that we hate getting presents for each other, but it's not true. We are cheapskates, but we don't just concentrate all our love and generosity on a couple of days throughout the year. Probably because we're too lazy to remember the dates. :)

I think the only holidays we're up to date on are Hinamatsuri (girl's, or doll's day in Japan), Halloween and Christmas. Hinamatsuri is actually quite hard because you have to put up a stand and set up a whole scene of dolls so that your daughters will get married. And then you have to take in down within the month, otherwise it wont work. (Which my mom always forgets to do. She isn't that keen on us getting married.... she just likes the dolls. And we'd help her take it down, but she says she likes doing it herself.... and then completely forgets about it.)

Oh, and at halloween we're awesome. My dad and I raid the shop for sweets, and then my mom makes popcorn balls stuck together with melted toffee, and she doesn't hand out stuff lightly, so all my friends and classmates love her. And my dad always gets dressed up, and decorates the garden and house, and we love carving pumpkins because it's just festive. I love the crisp feeling of the air, and the gloopy-ness of the pumpkin. It's a fun group activity, and that's what I think we (my family) like about holidays.

And on Christmas, we do get presents from each other, and my mom loves making me and my sister a stocking and our christmas trees are usually pretty piddly, but over-decorated. We watch rudolph and the simpsons christmas and do normal stuff. :3
But the thing we've just started to do more as a Christmas event is making weird food. Like, Asian food (we had an interesting mix of Thai, Japanese, Spanish and Korean, and I know Spain isn't in Asia...) or Lebanese food or something. I think this is actually our way of rebelling against the normal, expected Christmas dinner/behaviour. We're a weird family so our holidays will be too, or something like that. :3

/rant
haha, sorry! But I really love holidays, even if I can never remember when they're coming up. Not only does it let you off school (I got to have Christmas off in an Islamic part of Turkey, wahey) but it's a shared, international (sometimes..) period of fun and festivity. Just hearing Christmas songs makes me happy. And I know, some people haven't had great holidays, and @Cue, I'm sooo sorry for what you went through. :( I had an awful Christmas once. My sister and my mom got into a physical fight, my sister really hurt her and then ran away, my dad shouted at me for being so annoying and useless and drove off and my mom just stared at all the food she'd been making for the last week going to waste. It was horrible. And I never want to have a Christmas like that again.
I think a holiday is what you make it. If you don't have anyone to celebrate with, try and make happy memories of your own? I know that sounds sad but there's no point in holding yourself back from what's usually regarded as fun. It's nice to celebrate the, I dunno, passing of time, especially with people.

Christ I wrote a lot. o__o Sorry lool.

I made my Mom breakfast this morning! :P Pancakes, eggs, sausage, and a fruit bowl! It's a fun kinda holiday, but I do think its pointless to go out and buy every item in the known world that says "Happy Mother's Day" on them. My mom likes regular stuff, she got to sleep in, she didn't make breakfast, she got to have the longest shower. Things she usually sacrifices to others, because she's the mom. And yes I am a Momma's boy, gotta problem with that and you can kiss my 6' 2", 245 lbs. ass! :P

Originally Posted by Kris

People also buy things for the people they love on Christmas. It's not just about making money, it's about making the people you love happy. If these things didn't make people smile, no one would buy them.

Shouldn't it be the meaning behind the things you get them that makes them happy, and not the thing itself? ;P

In Ontario there is recently a family day. I think that is much better than a mother's day or a father's day. I don't think there should be holidays specific to loved ones that not everyone has. The same goes for Valentine's day, as Cue said.

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Originally Posted by Keyori

Most of the popular holidays exist purely for the purpose of generating revenue. Unless you're wanting to ban all holidays, the argument to ban Mother's Day in particular purely on the basis of commercialism holds no water.

I think mother's day in particular is one of the most commercialized holidays as there is no religious or cultural significance and people who are cruel to their mom aren't going to change that just for one day, whereas people who are nice to their moms on a regular basis can't exactly be nicer? They just buy a gift and say happy mothers day.

I'm not a big fan of Mother's Day. It was created to honour mothers, but having one day to do that seems to support the idea that it's okay to not appreciate them the rest of the year, and the commercialization of it causes those who cannot afford to get gifts for their mothers to feel as though they don't do anything for them. It does more harm than good, overall.

However, I disagree with the idea of getting rid of holidays that have become commercialized (all holidays practiced by a large percentage of a population eventually become commercialized) and even moreso with getting rid of those that some might be offended by. I could understand doing away with, say, Columbus Day. Indeed, I'm very much for that. But if you get rid of Mother's Day because some people do not have mothers or did not know their mothers or were abused by their mothers, where does it end? Can't celebrate Christmas, not everyone is Christian. Can't celebrate Halloween, not everyone is Christian. Can't celebrate (insert independence or revolution celebration), there are undoubtedly people who disagree with the circumstances surrounding the country gaining independence. Can't even have the "family day" Shiruvya mentioned, since many who do not have mothers do not have families either, and many of those who do are not on good terms with their family members. You would literally have to do away with all holidays, all celebrations, period, to appease everyone.

As for what I did Sunday, since everyone seems to be mentioning it, I took some flowers to my mothers' grave and visited my grandmother.

The lady who created it, created it so people would HONOR Mothers. Like president's day, of 4th of July (honoring/celebrating USA).

Sometimes I'm busy, so it's nice to have a day to spend with my mom. To let her know that I appreaciate her.

And I also have to agree with The Enchanted Tiara.

I'm a mom so I might be biased on this issue, but I think that holidays like that are special and benefit everyone. On mothers day my son proudly shows me the project he's worked hard on for me at school, I feel so loved and reflect on what I can do to be an even better mother, and my husband treats us to a night out for dinner which helps out our local economy. I really see nothing wrong with any of the holidays at all.

I have head that before, that Mother's Day, and later on Father's Day, were both holidays created for making money, similar to Valentine's Day. I don't think holidays like that are necessarily bad though. Many holidays have commercialized aspects, even the ones that weren't created for those reasons. It's up to individual people to choose if they want to spend money on those days, or do something else. People celebrate holidays in their own ways, so not everyone will necessarily go out and buy something for these days anyway. That said, I don't see anything wrong with there being holidays like this. I think it's nice that mothers and fathers have a day like this to celebrate them. It's not easy to be a parent, they deserve to have a special day. And this is coming from someone who is planning on never being a mom. :P I can see how days like this might be sad for some people depending on their situations, but it's like that with many holidays as well, and if we got rid of holidays because people felt negatively about them, we'd end up with no holidays at all. And just because someone had abusive, neglectful, etc parents, doesn't mean the parents that do work hard and raise their kids properly shouldn't get a special day. I realize not all parents necessarily deserve to be honored on days like this, so I totally understand people with those kinds of parents not celebrating with them. Also as far as the commercialized, moneymaking aspect of the holiday is concerned, one might take into account that while grown children might buy things for their parents, children who are still young probably won't, because kids don't have much money, if any money at all. At the most they might buy something cheap with their allowance or something. I didn't ever buy my parents stuff when I was a kid on these days. In fact, this might be the first year I'm really buying them anything, I bought my mom something, because I have a job and money now and will buy my dad something as well. I can't remember now if I bought they anything last year or not. I did not get my mom a card though... Didn't even think about it and don't think she even noticed or cared, so card companies didn't get any of my money. XD