Lawrence breathed in and out at the pace he wanted him to breathe at. He pulled him closer and gently rocked him back and forth, arms around him in a comforting manner.

Slowly it seemed like hours as his mind relaxed enough that the panic would let him go. As he started to breath normally again his body started to shake. ~I cant, I cant do it again.~

Lawrence held him, tightly. He was hoping to be reassuring. ~Do what again?~ His mental voice was very calm and kind. He wanted to get through to him.

~everything.~ his mind again flashed the thought of how he was blamed and then caned. Again his mind started to panic.

Lawrence patted his back. ~No more panicking. Just relax.~ His tone was soothing. Then, he paused. ~...Are you...basically wanting to ask me out?~

Looking up at Lawrence josh’s eyes grew wide, his heart stared to race. He could not answer it, he was to scared that he would say no.

Lawrence's expression was calm, and rather curious. ~...It's okay. Just tell me the truth, okay? You know me...I'm not going to be nasty to you. Just tell me the truth.~

~I cant, ~ he looked away, how could he look at him and not feel that way. ~I tried.~

Lawrence folded his arms across his chest. ~You're making it worse by not telling me the truth. Just tell me. You know me better than that--I'm not going to do anything mean.~

~ you did not listen when I did tell you so why should I try again. You wont hear me.~ it hurt, gods it hurt. He wanted to know yet now that he said what he did he wanted to run again, this time he did not have any hiding places to go to.

~...? If you said something, I mustn't have heard it...~ Lawrence looked honestly confused. ~I'm serious. Please, tell me.~ He wanted so badly to know.

"I love you...." his voice was barely a whisper.

Lawrence paused. So...he had heard right. For a moment, he said nothing. Lawrence had never dated before, in his entire life, and he had never felt anything for anyone else before. He'd always considered himself asexual. But...

He nestled his head into the side of Josh's neck, smiling. "I'm glad you feel that way. I've never been in any kind of a relationship or anything before...but...I'd like to try one with you..." He sounded honest, happy.

A wave of worry filled josh, never been…. This was not good. ~if you have never been then….~ he shouldn’t! it will just happen again! He will freak out!

~I want this, okay? I want to try. I'm a novice, but that doesn't mean I don't know how to love someone else.~ Lawrence held him, in a comforting manner. ~Trust me.~

“you won’t go telling other what I have done? You won’t….” His voice trailed off as he looked up into Lawrence’s eyes. He wanted this he might even say he needed this. Reaching up he pulled Lawrence’s face to his hand French kissed him. it was not graceful but it was full of passion.

Lawrence was about to tell him that of course he wouldn't tell on him, but he was surprised when he was kissed, so suddenly. He had never been kissed before. There was a moment of shock, then he looked quite content...

Kissing him josh pushed Lawrence down onto the ground, his need was there clearly In his eyes. Then remembering what had happened last time he had kissed a boy he pulled back. “Sorry…..” he sounded sheepish, lost. “I wont if you don’t…..” why he had been kicked out of his last school was on his record, if Lawrence so much as breathed a word of what he had just done, it was to the public schools for him.

Lawrence blinked, clearly flustered, and then nervously readjusted his glasses back into their rightful place. "...It's not that I don't want it, I...would like to go slowly, if that's not too much of a bother. I've never done this before...I've never dated anyone else before, or even thought of it."

Looking a bit happy but sheepish josh smiled. “I will take it as slow as you like. To tell you the truth, I have only kissed a guy I have never done anything else. My roommate only told the dean that I had done other things because he did not want to see me again after leading me on then running” sitting up with his back to the wall Josh sighed. His head tilted back gently resting on the wall. “He was my first crush.”

Laying back on the bed William licked his lip. It had been something he had never experienced. So much better than he had ever had with his old boy friend’s. ~you know, I think this pleasure vampire thing with this bound made that the best ever. Hopefully we can feel that way again and it was not a onetime thing.~ he pulled the blanket up over tzal as he pulled on his pants. Once on he lay back down.

Lawrence rested his head on his shoulder, frowning. "...Maybe he did feel something...but he was afraid. Afraid of the reactions of others...afraid of feeling something like that at all. Have you ever thought of that? It might not have just been all spite..."

Tzalmon didn't bother putting his clothes back on. When he slept, he either slept fully clothed or fully naked, unless he passed out in half-attire or something. ~Hm...I hope so, too...~

~I thought of that, but he had been so cold to me when I saw him in the deans room.~ shivers ran down his spine as the thought of that day again. ~it was last Easter brake that I was caned. It still scares me sometimes. It is part of the nightmare that I had… before sleeping with you.~ in the distance they could hear the bell ring for the end of the last period. “we need to get to professor Angelo’s class room I would hate to miss it AGAIN.” They had missed it on Monday and had gotten an earful about why they needed to be there.

Cuddling close William sighed sleepily. ~thanks tempter if you had not snared me and worked on me we never would have known.~ the bell rang over head. ~you know we may be able to use the free period on the plants but Angelo is not going to let us get out of our bound class.~

Lawrence grumbled but stood up. ~Ugh...I don't feel like it...I guess I'll just space out and listen only when it's absolutely necessary.~

Tzal nipped at his jaw, contently. ~I am proud of myself. And no, he won't let us miss it.~ Still, Tzal didn't move an inch.

Pushing himself up along the wall josh sighed. ~it’s not like you really have to pay attention to these things. Your powers still have not shown themselves yet, other than the ability to talk to me.~ Angelo had told them that until Lawrence’s powers fully developed he was going to just act as an anchor for the other three. There was not much that could be done in the classes with him. Josh held out his hand to Lawrence. ~is holding hands to quick?~

Sighing into the nipping William smiled. ~as much as I would love to just lay here and let you nibble on me, which feels fantastic by the way, we have to go.~ William did not want to get up either but he know what would happen if they did not. He tried to push himself up without stopping Tzal.

~Yeah, I guess so...um. It's not too quick...holding hands is okay.~ Lawrence contently took Josh's hand, smiling. He was disappointed that he couldn't do much in their class. He wanted his powers to come out, so badly.

Tzal frowned and stopped as a 'punishment' to William for making him get up. He fumbled for his clothing. ~You know, I have an idea we can present to him today. Perhaps we should find someone else whose powers clash with mine...maybe a few people...to see if we can have them identify Lawrence's power. Unless...you want to try taking a peek? You haven't tried, yet.~