Asher titches a bit at Shouki's whining because he doesn't want to hear Shouki make sounds like that. He doesn't want him to be sad about something. Even though he was part of the source that was causing him to act that way. "I...Don't know....I just know that I don't think I'm ready to leave yet. I was chasing after it for so long, but once I got some freedom...I was kind of scared..." He said as he looked down trying to find out what he wanted to say. He didn't want Shouki to miss understand him. "You helped me so much with things, but I felt like I was just a burden to you...I don't want to just follow you around while you do everything....I want to be able to help you and not be clueless about everything around me...I know so little..." Asher looks at Shouki and hopes he understands that he still wants to be with him, but he wants to be like an equal. He doesn't want to be a little kid following him around lost in his shadow. Asher smiles when Shouki leans into him and nods. "I would really like that." He says glad that Shouki was feeling a least a bit better.

"I-I can understand that scared." Shouki was terrified when his parents left him. He had no clue what to do and ended up begging and the like for awhile. "But you wouldn't have been alone." Shouki would've stood by him...make sure he got food and everything else he needed. "You weren't a burden! A burden is something you don't want around! I want you around. I wanted you around then too!" He's halfway clinging to Asher's leg with his face kind of buried in Asher's leg. "You'd never be a burden." It makes him feel bad that Asher would feel that way. Over time Asher would've learned and then they could both have a stall if he wanted....Shouki shakes his head a bit at the thought. It makes him want to cry again and so he pushes it away. He tugs a bit at Asher. "Then get down here."

"I know I wouldn't be alone..." Asher said as he looked down. "I may not be a burden, but I feel like one. I feel like I'm not doing anything helpful." He may not have been a real burden, but he felt like one when he just stood around. He didn't know anything and he just ran around following in others shadow. He didn't want to do that he wanted to be able to do things on his own. He knew he had to learn, but sometimes he felt like people babied him. He didn't want that either, he had had enough of that from his mother. He didn't need it from everyone else. Asher sat down next to Shouki to get ready to make bracelets with him. "When I'm ready you'll be the person I go to. I want to be with Shouki when I leave." He said with a little smile.

Shouki can't help but whine again. "You'd never be a burden....and you're helpful...just by being around." He says very softly. It's the truth. He's happier with Asher just being around....well until recently at least. He smiles back a bit at Asher at his words. But when will that be? If it hurts this much...he won't be able to go long with this pain. It's impossible for him. He can only deal with so much pain like that. It hurts him to the core when he thinks about it. "...okay then....good deal." At least he isn't crying anymore right?

"How am I helpful when I don't know anything?" Asher asked looking over at Shouki. He didn't understand how he could be helpful just sitting there doing nothing. That wasn't helping that was sitting by while someone else did the work. He didn't think that was helpful in anyway. Asher looked around for the things to make bracelets with. He didn't know where Shouki had placed them. He wanted to make more to get better at it so he could do something for him. At this point he could only sit back and do nothing if he wanted to work with Shouki. "It is because then I'll work too and then we'll get a bigger house and live together forever!" Asher says getting excited about it. He likes that idea a lot.

"You just are." Shouki gets the bad of random bracelet things out. "And you can learn. Every one does...because none of us want to starve or freeze or anything like that. So we learn...and I said I would protect you...so if you were with me....you wouldn't have to worry about those. They fit under protection." At least that's how he sees it. "You're helpful by just being you." He says softly before starting to make a bracelet. He smiles at that last part...Asher isn't the only one that likes that idea a lot, but also the thought hurts him because he thinks it'll probably never happen. He still hopes something like that will happen though.

Asher nods, but he doesn't say anything because he really doesn't know how he feels about that. He likes the idea of Shouki protecting him, but he wants to do things on his own for himself. He doesn't want others to do it for him. He has had enough of that from his mother. Asher reaches over into the bag of bracelets and grabs the things he needs to make the one he knows. Since he only knew how to make one that was his only option at the moment. "How's that helpful?" Asher asks are he works on his bracelet. He doesn't understand that because just being himself meant him standing around doing nothing. He didn't know how to do anything other than stand out of the way of people. That's what he had been raised to do was stand out of sight unless he was needed to talk, which wasn't often. Asher looks up in time to see Shouki smile and he smiled back at him. "I'll make an even better bracelet, just you wait and see!" He says before he looks back down to continue.

"You're just helpful.....I don't really know how to explain it to you." Shouki does the whine thing again. "But you are helpful. I promise." He knows some things he could say, but they're way too embarrassing, in his mind, to say right now. Maybe he will say them later, but for now he can't...and won't. But he can definitely tell the difference between Asher being there and Asher not being there. That's how Asher is helpful....even if he doesn't realize it. Shouki knows it though so it's good. "Go for it." Shouki just goes back to making the bracelet, nothing in particular in mind right now.

"I'll believe you..." Asher said with a glance up at Shouki. He didn't know how he could be helpful, but he guess he would believe Shouki when he said he was. He had some doubts about it that he couldn't let go, but he trusted that Shouki wouldn't lie to him about that. Asher grinned at Shouki when he told him to go for it. "I will!" He said as he went back to making his bracelet. He tried to do his best on it and when he finished a while later it looked better than the last he had done by a bit. He was excited about it and was bouncing in place as he sat on the ground. "Look, look! I did it!" Asher said as he turned to Shouki and held up his bracelet for Shouki examine. He hoped it liked that he had done better this time.

"You should believe me. Why would I lie?" Shouki is just speaking the truth. What would either of them gain from him lying? Not a thing except, possibly, some drama later on when Asher finds out he was lying. But he isn't so that isn't going to happen. Vivi is still working on his bracelet, he's moving slow today, as Asher finishes the bracelet he's working on. He notices the bouncing enthusiasm coming from Asher and starts giggling. It's been a long time, if ever, that he's seen anyone this enthusiastic over anything....and it's cute coming from Asher. "Congratulations. You're getting better." He says after inspecting it.

[Sorry it took me so long I had to work all day yesterday only to get home to see that the site was down and I couldn't even load the page >.<]

Asher just looked away for a moment and shrugged it really wasn't that it was Shouki he didn't trust or even thought he would lie to him. He just didn't really believe in himself all that much. So, it really wasn't Shouki he thought was lying he just didn't know if he believed that he was all that helpful. Asher smiled when he heard Shouki giggle at him and he leaned over and hugged him. "I know! Soon I'll be able to make a harder one!" He said excited about making something harder than the bracelet he had been making. He liked making bracelets with Shouki. "Then we can actually sell the bracelets I make."

(I know...I cam home and refreshed-checking for replies and it was down D: and it was down earlier today too D: )

Shouki whines a bit, not meaning to, when he looks away, but he goes back to his bracelet instead of saying anything. Especially since he has no clue of what to say. And he doesn't know what Asher is thinking exactly. He just hugs Asher back and is unable to resist the urge to nuzzle him a bit. "Yep, soon you will be." He smiles a bit at him. At the mentioning of selling what Asher makes....Shouki doesn't want to sell them....at least not all of them. He wants to keep some of them at least. "So....what have you been doing?"

[It was down until about 2 or 2:30 for me. I was really worried that I might not have been able to get on before I left for work.]

Asher doesn't like when Shouki whines and if his ears would have been visible they would have been flatten, but no one can see them because of the hat. Asher cheers up a bit when he feels Shouki hug him back and nuzzles into him. He hugs him tighter with a big smile on his face. "Then we'll have more money for the Zoo." Asher says getting excited just mentioning the Zoo. He stops though when Shouki asks him what he has been doing. Asher shrugs a bit at the question as he thinks about it. "Well, I played outside a lot...My moms been on the phone a lot recently fighting with my dad, I think. I'm not sure if it's him, but I think it is" He shrugs again. He hadn't been paying too much attention to it because it mad him sad to think about it. His mother though was in tears almost every time as she yelled into the phone demanding things and blaming him for things. He could only image what his dad was saying on the other line. Though in truth he hoped he never found out. "So, I just stayed outside running around the fields." He smiled and looked at Shouki. "What have you been doing?"

(I dunno how late it was down, but it made me sad D: )

Shouki couldn't hold back the whine earlier....he didn't mean to whine. He squeaks a bit at the tightening of the hug, a bit surprised. "Yep, which more money is good....especially if we get hungry or something while there..." The food isn't extremely expensive, but it isn't very cheap either...but it is good too from what he remembers....which that gets his stomach to growl a bit. "I'm sorry." That Asher has to hear the fights, not that they are fighting. Because if he is right on who....they should've been fighting for a long time....since what that guy did to Asher. Though he knows it can't be pleasant for Asher to hear-that's what he doesn't like at all. Shouki just shakes his head a bit at the question. "I haven't been doing anything." The literal truth minus the sleeping.

[I know I was looking forward to getting on when I finally got home from work and it was down DX]

Asher chuckled when he heard Shouki's squeak. He thought it was cute, but he released his hold on him a bit. He smiles when he says the more money they had was good. He wanted their trip to be a good one that they would both really like. Asher tilts his head a bit when he hears Shouki's stomach growl. "Are you hungry?" He asks him as he looks at him. Asher shakes his head at him when he says he is sorry. "It's fine." He didn't really mind it since he could escape out into the yard for hours on end without worrying about his mother yelling at him. "You must have done something?" Asher says with a frown. He didn't think that he would just do nothing while they weren't together. He must have done something.

(I had that except it wasn't after work lol...it was just in general)

"Not funny." Shouki puffs his cheeks a bit. It wasn't like he could stop the squeak. He just shakes his head a bit. "Food can wait....I'm not that hungry." Which is a lie if you go by the noise his stomach made earlier. "Yeah.....but..." Shouki sighs a bit. "Wish you didn't have to hear it." He mumbles. He can't really remember if his parents fought or anything. He's been on his own for years and that wasn't too important to him either away. Erasing them, or pushing them to the back of his mind, were the best options. He just shakes his head a bit. "I didn't do anything. I rarely do anything." It's not like he has other friends or anything. He's been focusing on selling things and trying to survive off of that instead of other things.

"Yes, it is." Asher said chuckling a bit at Shouki getting a bit upset about it. Asher tilts his head at him when he says foods not important. "Yes, it is you need it if you're hungry. You can't just starve." Asher didn't want Shouki to be hungry if he could help it. He knew it was a bad idea to take him home with him, but his mother had given him a little bit of money to use while he was out. "I would have found out one way or another like I did before." Asher said shrugging. It was probably better that he found out right when it was happening than when it was all done and over with. "Okay..." Asher said when Shouki told him he hadn't done anything while they were apart. Asher didn't like that all that much, but he didn't protest about it.

Shouki shakes his head a bit. "I'm not really hungry." And he isn't lying really. This isn't hungry compared to other times and because of those other times...this doesn't feel like hungry. "And I'm not going to starve. It takes longer than that for someone to starve. About a month supposedly." Random information Shouki knows. "Well...yeah....but I doubt it's enjoyable to hear them fight." His ears would be back and twitching a bit if they were free. "I really haven't.....it's what I did before." Before he met Asher he means. "There's nothing to do really."

"Well, if you say so..." Asher says a bit sadly because he is a bit worried about Shouki. He didn't think he was lying, but he didn't think Shouki would tell him if he was. He probably didn't want Asher to worry. It made Asher feel bad for being part of the source of it. "I only hear what my mother says. I don't really want to hear what my fathers says." Asher says shrugging again. He doesn't know how he really feels about everything. He just knows that he is upset about everything because it's his fault other than that he doesn't know what to feel. "You could have come to visit me." Asher says looking down at the ground. In fact he had been hoping that one of those days Shouki would come to visit him. He even stayed outside longer than he normally would to wait for him.

"I'm....sorry?" Shouki doesn't know what to do about it. He doesn't feel hungry and he's not going to eat when he doesn't feel hungry. If he still doesn't feel hungry later, he'll probably eat anyway. He knows that normal people usually eat....two?....three? times a day....so he needs to at least eat one. "Mmm. I can't blame you." Since Asher's dad did that horrible thing to him...Shouki can't really blame him. Shouki lets out a whine and becomes very fixated on that bracelet he's been making. He really has nothing to say about that one. He doesn't want to talk about where that will probably lead if he does. He doesn't want to go into the why he didn't visit part.

"No, No! It's fine!" Asher says shaking his hands with a little smile to make it so Shouki think he is upset. "You didn't do anything wrong so no need to be sorry." He said with a smile. It was true though Shouki hadn't done anything wrong that would be cause for him to say that he was sorry. "Though...I know it's nothing good by the way my mother replies...But it's okay, right? I don't have to deal with it anymore." Asher said though the last part was more for himself than Shouki, but he just spoke his thoughts sometimes when he wasn't really meaning to. Asher kind of jumps when he hears Shouki whine and concentrate on his bracelet. He didn't know what to do he hadn't meant to cause this. "It's okay, I know you where probably busy here. It was selfish of me to think that you would come when you must have been busy." Asher said though it upset him a bit, but he knew it must have been somewhat true.

"You sure?" Shouki tilts his head a bit. "Your voice said different..." But beyond that he lets it drop. There's really no point on keeping it going. "I think it would be better for them to stop talking if all they're going to do is fight....but I can't make them do anything...that their lives there." Though he wishes they would stop fighting. Even if Asher is trying to hide and all, and even if he's good at it, it still has to bother him. It would bother most people, wouldn't it? Shouki bows his head a bit more. He doesn't correct Asher though. He doesn't need to know that Shouki was pretty much moping about and doing nothing except, pretty much, lying there. Asher doesn't need to know that. It wouldn't really help anything in his mind, so he says nothing.

"Eh, yeah...." Asher says looking down at his hands for a moment before glancing up. He knew he couldn't hide anything, but it was just a attempt to make Shouki feel better. He didn't mean to make it worse just because he wasn't used to comforting people like Shouki or any other kid that grew up around people. Even if Shouki may not have had a normal childhood he at least knew how things worked. "I'm sorry..." Asher says since Shouki already knew that he wasn't telling the truth it didn't matter now. " But you don't just stop talking to someone you loved for a portion of your life, would you?" Asher asked because now he felt unsure of whether what he thought was even right among all the normal people. "I mean I wouldn't stop talking to Shouki just because of one thing....Even if it was something really bad. I would still miss you, wouldn't you?" Asher asked looking at the ground unsure of what to do. He knew he must have sounded like an idiot to Shouki or anyone. He didn't know anything and he hated it, but he didn't know how to change it. Asher glances up in time to see Shouki bow his head more and he frowns. "See, I knew you were busy." He said trying his hardest to make it sound normal and for the most part he thought it was, but he knew that was probably just him. Shouki probably knew the difference. He looked back down as he frowned deeper.

"It's alright." Asher has his reasons for doing that.."Yeah, actually I have done that before. They gave me no choice. They left me, so yeah I have. And I have no clue if it's for the better or for the worse." He's not even looking up as he says these things. "If we were reversed....it would be better in a way. My parents would have welcomed your ears and tail.....and mine....well....they didn't come in until recently...." He's speaking very quietly. "They left me because they didn't come in quick enough." And that really pisses him off. He knows why they left, but he has what he lacked then. They why the left thing. "And it depends on what I did if you'd still miss me. There is only so much one person can take before they break....or become hard and cold. But I guess I understand." Even though he wouldn't take his parents back even if they actually did want him now. Shouki does notice the difference, but says nothing about it.

Asher was kind of crying now though it really wasn't anything that Shouki had done. Asher was getting frustrated about everything that was being said. He didn't understand half of it, but knew that it upset Shouki a lot. Asher stood up when Shouki told him that he wouldn't miss him depending on what he did. He closed his hand into a fist and tightened him them looking down at the ground. He was crying still, but he wouldn't let it get to him. "I know how I feel! Even if I would hate you I would still miss you." He shook his head. "I'd still miss the Shouki I had known before you did whatever you did. You can't change that!" Asher said spinning on his heels and running away. He was running the wrong direction of his home, but he didn't care. He just wanted to get away from all the things he didn't understand and people trying to tell him how he felt. He knew how he felt even if it took him longer than others or he didn't understand at first. He ran for a while before he noticed he wasn't in a place he knew. He looked around before he walked to an alley way and sat down in a ball. He didn't know where he was and he was frustrated and upset with himself.