Everyone is good at something, even if they don't believe they are... I am not good with poems, so excuse how lame or ... pathetic it sounds or don't fit :P

Hidden Talent
-Dedicated to HIM_ROCK

Shadows & light
Hope & Fright
everything has
a hidden might

Some with Insight
and some wihtout
you just haven't
figured it out.

Black & White
Colors and Grey
You may not see
but you are really great

Hidden Might
Hidden Flight
You'll soon see
what you're
meant to be

You are good at things, HIM, writing and expressing yourself through written word is one of your talents. I can tell just from your posts.

It seems though that you lack confidence. With practice comes confidence, so I suggest you try to keep doing things, even if you don't feel like you can do them well, because that's a way to increase confidence, and that includes confidence in social situations and getting along with people.

You're here for yourself, HIM. You're here to experience the world and the things life has to offer. If other people are hard on you, I'm so sorry for that, but what's most important is yourself. It can be so hard to see that, I know, but there is so much beauty in life that you can experience. And I don't mean just huge grand things like falling in love and traveling to exotic locales. Reading books, looking up at the stars, even just enjoying a nice sandwich, there are a lot of great things in everyday life if you look at them. Focus on the things that make you happy, everything you like. Make lists of them. Grab every last bit of positivity in your life and have a good staring contest with them until they're permanently burned into your brain and you couldn't forget how much you love them if you tried. They exist for you to enjoy. It can seem silly because the things can be so little, but nothing that makes you happy is trivial. Then it can be easier to do more things that will bring more happiness in an infinite loop. And that's just how things have worked for me, if that Meaning of Life doesn't suit you, you can find your own. But there are a million reasons, really.

I've had depression and I know it can be so hard to see any positivity, and I know it's not as simple as just flipping a switch and being okay. I hope you know I'm not suggesting that. But I want you to know that these things are there. There are infinite reasons to be here once you're able to see them. Don't deny yourself the chance to be happy by leaving, you deserve to be happy and you will be. You will find your place, I promise you that. And I absolutely promise that I would miss you if you were gone. I truly would.

Family just ignore it and it'll go away which works fine...for them. They never really take any notice of me unless I burst into tears which is normally when I get told to stop being so stupid.

I agree with Cherry that you are here only for yourself. I would give more advice, but, I understand you are not me so I'm not sure how useful it would be. Happy Valentines Day though *Hugs you* I call today the day of singles :3

I'm sorry they don't understand and are so insensitive, HIM. :hug: I forgot to put this in my last post, but you can PM me any time, okay? I promise it's no bother at all. Say anything you want.

HIM, I feel like we are on the same wavelength. I moved to a new state halfway across the country from where I grew up, so now I have no job and no friends. I've been isolated for over two months now, no luck in the job hunt and I'm too socially awkward to just throw myself into a bar or club to make friends. I'm surprised my husband isn't tired of me yet; I've been exceptionally clingy towards him since he's the only person I know here. I annoy him to no end.

I do know, however, that I'll get my happy day where I start making friends again and even get employed somewhere. And that's what keeps me going.

Just know that it gets better :heart:

Originally Posted by HIM_ROCK

I don't seem to belong anywhere, I try to fit in and have friends but the moment they find out I have a mental illness they just use me for when they want to feel better about themselves.

Nothing seems to be good enough for anyone to accept me, I've tried being myself and I've tried chaning who I am yet nothing works.

I just feel like dissapearing and never comming back because no one would miss me.

Him, you know that's not true! You belong here, with us! -clutches you to my bosom-
What would Vicky do without you, eh?

On a less flippant note, I want to point out the earnest, supportive responses you are getting in this thread. If that doesn't stand for something, I don't know what does. <3

No matter what, you should always proud to be yourself. You and you and you are nobody else. You are perfect in ever way people see as imperfect. And in any case, you are your own worst critic. We see the false flaws others see past or see more of and we are the ones who know just when something needs changed. Not physically, but mentally. If they were your true friends, they would accept you. Hell, I don't have any true friends right now. They all see me as a child to talk down upon or they see me as the worse kind of friend. Just keep being yourself, you will always have friends whether you see it or you don't. Just wait and see. You'll have friends sooner than later. But remember, you're not alone and it always does get better. The sun always shines.

Just really pissed off at the moment I can't seem to do anything right and any time I say anthing I'm snapping. I just feel like giving up, and joy of joys I've been put with nursary every Friday, which sends anxiety levels though the roof as if it wasn't stressful enough having to look after 3 and 4 year olds.

But...you have a job now, HIM!! :O I didn't know this!

It's only two hours on a Thursday and three on a Friday and the odd day when I'm needed but at least I'm getting experience working

Yes! It's a great start! I'm sorry that the little ones stress you out, but hopefully you'll learn to deal with that :hug:

I'm jealous, at least you get to get out of the house and interact with other people... I just got a denial letter for my DREAM JOB and I'm super bummed out about it. At this point I just want something to *do* you know?

Anyway, I'm so happy for you! Having a foot in the door is a great feeling.

Incerdiably pissed off at the sister at the moment. She keeps taking my things which range from my make-up to clothing and she's even taken my netbook before without asking if she can borrow it. It doesn't matter what I do if I hide stuff she finds it and even when I've had my name on things she still takes it and says it's hers when it clearly has my name on it.

She's 27 yet acts like she's 7 when confronted about taking my stuff and yet still gets the special treatment because "she has a problem like you do only she can't get rid of stuff" according to the parents. No parents there's a difference between mental health problems and just not bothering to sort though stuff and get rid of it, not an OCD as they'd like to believe she has.

Now because she did all her GCSEs and actually finnished school she can get into debt and go on a see it, want it, buy it spree but god forbid I buy something I want because I'm just not as good as her seeing as I never finnished school properly or did half the GCSEs I was suppposed to do, just did english, maths and science and mucked up geography compleatly. So I'm never going to be as good as her because I don't have the 6 GCSEs employers want so it's going to be forever stuck in a job on minimum pay where I don't need any qualifications.

Family strife can be tough. Sometimes it's family that is the most blind to the issues, and negatives and positives of a person. I can't see into your parents' minds, but do you think it's possible that they think she's more or less launched, and whatever trouble she gets into now (spending wise, etc) it's on her head, but since you are struggling, they are still dictating what they think you should be doing, in an effort to guide you?
There are varying levels of OCD actually. I've been diagnosed with it, and am on the lower end. Maybe she only has some of the symptoms.

When I looked into going on a collage course it wasn't my choice of what I wanted to do because they wanted me to go on an administation course because that's what my sister did and they wanted me to get a job to pay for driving lessons because that's what my sister did. It's as if they want annother one of her.

My sister is the "I will do" person if she can't see anything that will benifit her in it she won't do it, plus she's lazy and claims that after a day of work she's too tired to do anything unless that happens to be going out drinking which means that someone else can do everything for her and if you don't then she goes off on one and says if you don't do that for me I won't do anything for you ever again.

Mm. Parents often say they make all the mistakes with their first child, but I imagine it also ends up being the benchmark for the others, whether they should be or not....

And so the bitchy backstabbing beings with work seeing as the headteacher is looking to make cuts so it's run off and tell everyone else what I missed doing rather than telling me.

And whatever I say I'd like to take a course in is useless because who's going to employ me.

And my mum's pissed off with me because apparenlty going home from work to be unwell and throw up is far worse than staying at work and throwing up

I'm sorry she wasn't being very understanding. :hug: I hope you feel better soon!

And it's going to be onto hiding food again because my sister is eating everything that she can find without even asking if it's alright.

I give up.

Don't give up, HIM. :hug: You can make it, I know you can. Stay strong, you will make it through.

Back being jobless again