You're not useless, HIM, I promise you that. Are you still at your previous job or did you quit?

I got made redundant last in first out.

I know how you feel, I'm also one of those people that doesn't really fit in. But what I learned over the years is that people who can't accept you for who you are, aren't real friends. Friends won't use you, they like you for who you are and they will miss you when you aren't around. It is a shame that had to find out about that the hard way, but now I've learned my lessons, I know when some one is worth my time.

I'm sorry, HIM. Don't give up hope, though. It's tough for anyone to get and keep a job right now, it's nothing to do with you personally.

I use to feel like that a lot :I
I use to be so worried about fitting in and making people like me but one day i just woke up and asked myself...
"why do i even care what they think?!"
I realized that how they perceive me doesn't really matter, it's how i perceive myself.
People are gonna talk about you all your life,good and bad, you choose how it effects you.
Don't let them get you down, don't let them make you feel any other way then they way you wanna feel.
You're a special person inside and out and if they can't see that then they need to bugg off <3

I have had it I really have screw the driving lessons I'm not even going to be allowed near the precious car when I pass without being told I'm doing things wrong, job seakers allowence I'm not even going to bother with after all the help I was supposed to get but mother didn't listen when I said I was going to go on it I needed help with the forms. It all came back to "I'm not forcing you to go on job seakers" er hello I'm telling you I'm going to go on it and I'd like help with the forms. And the job center people are useless they don't help at all.

And it gets better having been told I can't go to China because it'll be spending time with their, refering to my cousin's husband's, family but I have to go to Turkey to see my auntie, as if that's a totally new country to go to and not do the same thing we do every year over there. So I couldn't go see my cousin have her wedding in China and it's made to sound like I'd be gatecrashing on a a family trip of people I've just met.


Along with constantly being told I need to do more exercise to stop me being tired all the time because I'm lazy and that's why I'm tired not the medication at all and then I get told I'll get too fat to get out the house if I carry on the way I am, but I am getting exercise but mother is too far up on her high horse to care and then has a go when she forgets to take her medication.

And the parents have been proven right when they said you'll never get a job...Might as well just curl up and die now

You can and will get a job, HIM. It's tough to get a job now for everyone, it's nothing to do with you. Just make sure you have a nice resume and keep it up to date, be polite and confident (even if you have to fake it!) in your interviews, and your job will come along soon. :hug:

And the sister has compleatly pissed me off, she puts on the nicey nicey act for everyone but makes me feel like I'm worthless and shouldn't be in her room. I have to hide no end of stuff because she takes it then says it's hers even when I've put my name of stuff she still says it's hers and my stuff doesn't matter if she knocks it off she just tramples it and not content with filling most of the shared room with her stuff and then complaining she doesn't have enough space, she takes over what little space I have. At the moment I don't have access to the wardrobe and I can only get into the top three draws on my chest of draws.

Being with so little space of her own even though she has a built in wardrobe to herself, chest of draws with a huge pile of clothing and god knows what in it and under bed draws cammed full of stuff as well as a shed full of clothing, DVDs, shoes and other bits she never uses she feels the need to pile everything up in the conservatory right next to my guinea pigs so if it gets damp in there my guinea pigs are going to get sick. As if that wasn't enough she has also filled the space at the end of my bed and often on the end of my bed meaning I end up with three quaters of a bed to sleep in.


She has no respect for anyone else she ripps the curtins wide open and then crashes about waking everyone up and she does the same thing at night. IF she's up everyone has to be and because I'm in the way of her she'd more than once stood on me while I've still been in bed to get to the wardrobe, then it's my fault she'd had to stand on me.

Wow, that's a serious lack of respect for your space and things, I'd agree. Have you stood up for yourself over this issue?

It always comes back to she hasn't got enough space and mother keeps telling me to have a clear out and get rid of some of my stuff.

:/ Well that's not fair.

HIM, I hope you understand that these are issues with the behavior of your mother and your sister. If someone else was in your place, they would be treated the same way. I know this is painful and trying in ways I couldn't even begin to imagine, but I truly hope you understand that none of this treatment is something that you somehow deserve. You have not done or been anything that warrants the way they've treated you. And that doesn't make it less hurtful, I know, but just please don't feel that this a reflection of some kind of flaw or something.

Now, there's nothing I can say that's going to fix their behavior. Toxic people will continue to be toxic and, sadly, there's no real changing that. All that can be done is to lessen their presence in your life. I wouldn't be surprised if you felt a lot better once that happened.

I know you're having difficulty on the job front currently, but please do not feel that that is in any way an indication of how things will go in the future. You can get out and you will. Unfortunately, you can't really rely on much help from your mother, judging by what you've said about asking her for help before. But that's okay because you can do this on your own. You can write a resume and fill out applications and take public transit if she won't drive you. You can take charge and end up with a little flat of your own or with a roommate where you'll get to have your closet to yourself and your sleep largely uninterrupted. It does take work, and I know that's scary and daunting and it's easy to say that it's too hard, especially with depression, and it is hard, but I have all the confidence that you're capable of it.

And the mother keeps going on at me to get up and get moving because when she comes back from work I'm sat down having just had something to eat. But in her mind it must be that I sat down all the time and doing nothing

Aw. :( You know you got stuff done, though. :hug:

I think it's because my auntie's over at the moment mum's acting like this because it always unsettles her when auntie comes over then goes off back to Turkey for 3 months.

Yeah, stress can do that to people sometimes. I'm sorry she's taking it out on you. :hug:

And just as things were going better my cosplay comes and the mother's lost the fucking headband to it and told me I can get another one. Yeah get another one when the only ones with bows on that go right round the head are toddlers or have wire in them.

I just feel like I can do or say anything right at the moment without upsetting someone