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Ava The Vampire
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#6076
Old 09-15-2017, 01:59 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kirin Rosenbaum View Post
I wouldn't leave you Ava.

Thanks, Kirin.

I think most of the time, it usually freaks people out when they find out that you're in the psych ward. People have all sorts of crazy misconceptions and they think that you are dangerous when you go to the psych ward... Going to the psych ward and getting out again is like going to jail, in my opinion.

It's bad enough as it is that they take everything off you and put you in a locked facility, but to have people think of you as "dangerous" when you get out is even worse. Give me the people in the psych ward!

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#6077
Old 09-15-2017, 03:27 AM

Ava...You must have had some really insincere friends, for them to leave you in your most vulnerable moments!
I wouldn't leave you! I would be swaddling you with attention and constantly asking if there was something I could do for you!
My aunt had a few mental breakdowns that put her in the hospital...it never occurred to me that she was dangerous to anyone when she got out.
More than anything, I felt sorry for her.
You don't strike me as a danger to others...maybe to yourself, sometimes, but not others!

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#6078
Old 09-15-2017, 05:18 AM

Ava - I can be sure to add you sometime in the game (Eldevin) so that I can help you sometimes ^^

Ah yeah it is a lot more different. It's important to take your time growing accustom to a city. Especially as more people will want to take advantage of you.

Well ava, coming to terms with it is the best way to work on it. People with it can lead normal happy lives.

Inzane - People with mental illness... the majority of the time the only danger is to themselves. They are so much gentler than normal people in my experience.

Kirin Rosenbaum
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#6079
Old 09-15-2017, 10:24 AM

See Ava you have friends that won't leave you.

Ava The Vampire
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#6080
Old 09-15-2017, 03:59 PM

Inzane;
Yeah... I've had friends who I thought were really, really good friends leave me once I told them that I was in the psych ward. :(
I appreciate that you guys won't leave me. I think I've been to the hospital... what? Three or four times since I've joined here? And you are all still talking to me. I appreciate it very much!

I just feel so alone sometimes, IRL. I'm the only person in my entire family with "mental illness". :(

Poet;
I have downloaded the game and tried it out for a little bit, but it's really laggy on my computer. I will try it out on my newer desktop later, though. I might like it more there than I do here.

I hate it that my parents think that everyone is going to try to take advantage of me just because of my diagnosis. I even had a friend of mine try to tell me that I am considered a "vulnerable adult" because I am "disabled", but I don't think that's true.

I don't want to come to terms with it. I want to be cured of it and I want to probve to everyone that I really don't have it so that people will stop treating me differently.

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#6081
Old 09-15-2017, 05:54 PM

Of course we still talk to you. You have very interesting thoughts and views. They are what define you, not where you are.

Well ava everyone has their issues. Some mental illness goes unchecked for years, and some skip generations.

That might be the game server. It does that sometimes. Lots of people get lag.

You would be classified as a vulnerable adult, but you are on the top of that spectrum. Still able to think and focus. But during your episodes you are quite vulnerable. But for your diagnosis your primary dangers would be your thoughts and self harm.

To my knowledge you can't cure it, but I do know that you can overcome it. If you remember that video from TED talk, she had overcome it and was able to live a normal life.
Even though there was a clown sitting in the crowd she knew he was not real. It yet he was there, but she could ignore him and continue with life.

The first step to recovery is acceptance. I had to do this for many of my issues. My depression and my anxiety which I will have to fight for survival for the rest of my life.

Kirin Rosenbaum
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#6082
Old 09-16-2017, 12:06 AM

i fight with self doubt so much.

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#6083
Old 09-16-2017, 02:18 AM

I think that is one of the most common fights.

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#6084
Old 09-16-2017, 04:22 AM

Thanks, Poet

It's just weird no one in my family has any history of mental illness besides some grandmothers with dementia, and even then, it's pretty rare. But no one in my family aside from my parents know about my diagnosis.

I will try it again sometime later on today... I think my computer is just old and slow. I will try it on my newer PC later on. I think that might make a difference. And I am always very paranoid that my computer will crash on me at any time. :s

I don't believe I am a vulnerable adult. What does that even mean?! I can take care of myself just fine.

I remember that. But "managing" means meds my whole life... And I don't want to take medication my whole life. I want to do things with my life, like have children or drink wine sometimes... I can't get pregnant on these meds.

I just don't know if I believe that I am actually "sick" or have "schizophrenia". It doesn't make sense to me. I can admit that I have anxiety, but not schizophrenia.

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#6085
Old 09-16-2017, 04:58 AM

Well schizophrenia has has links around the age of a father. The older a father is the higher the risk is.

Fortunately that game isn't very taxing compared to many others.

Well looking into it, you are barely on the spectrum of a vulnerable adult.
Quote:
The law defines ‘vulnerable adult’ as (RCW 74.34.020 ; RCW 74.34.021):

A person 60 years of age or older with functional, physical, or mental inability to care for self; or
An adult 18 years of age or older who:
Has a developmental disability; or
Has a guardian as per RCW 11.88 ; or
Lives in a nursing facility, boarding home, adult family home, or soldier’s home, residential habilitation center, or any facility licensed or required to be licensed by the Department of Social and Health Services (DSHS); or
Receives in-home services through a licensed health care agency, hospice, or an individual provider; or
Self-directs his/her own care
(see RCW 74.39.050).
Self Directs their own care would be the category you fall into. As you've said you take care of yourself fine.
But of course, any person who is young can be taken advantage of. We have to learn experiences from others or from our own mistakes to overcome that.
But for someone with schizophrenia I believe you are managing yourself a lot better than most do, which is probably why you don't feel vulnerable.

Well Ava, most people take meds. A very large percentage do. It's why we are able to live as long now as compared to the past.

It's true that alcohol isn't ideal, but is alcohol that important? You might be able to ask if having a small glass with a meal would affect your meds. Of course heavier alcohols would affect you more but maybe that Kombucha stuff with a meal might be acceptable. It's worth asking, as that stuff is quite light and I remember you asking about it before.
As for kids. Schizophrenia can be passed on to children. Seems about a 13% chance as compared to the 1% for the general population.

I think the main portion that is schizophrenia is the voices. There is a disconnect in the brain that causes the thoughts you have to be heard externally.
Interesting thing I read one time, is that in other countries people with schizophrenia believe that their voices are from ancestors, and that the voices are encouraging and not negative. I wonder if environment might affect the way the voices speak.

So I mean... it might be possible for science to eventually find a way to treat it. But the brain is very complex. They would need to figure out where the connection is missing. But I think that given what those voices say and how they affect you, getting consistency would be the most important step.
Once you get to the stage where you are nolonger hearing voices for a few months, you might be able to start asking about slowly reducing your dose.

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#6086
Old 09-16-2017, 06:11 AM

That is interesting, I didn't know that

That's good, I hope i will get to play it soon enough

Oh, I see. I guess I am okay with being barely on the spectrum. It's better than being the definition of.
Thanks, Poet. I try my best to manage. Truthfully, I have a load of help from my parents, my mom reminds me to take my meds and she goes with me to my psychiatry appointments. She is the first one to take me to the hospital when I need it and she is always calling my therapist and psychiatrist with updates on me when I am at home.
It's nice to have her to help me, but at the same time I am a huge financial burden. Not much anymore, though, because I get disability checks each month and I have medical assistance so my parents don't have to pay out of pocket for my medical bills anymore.

I hate my meds, they make me fat. And besides that, they are just a pain in the ass to remember to take.

I guess alcohol really isn't that important. I love kombucha and I can drink that with my meds. Kombucha is healthier too so I guess I can just start with that. But as for kids, I can't get pregnant on my meds because if I take my meds and try to carry a baby to term, the meds would cause birth defects.

The voices for me are pretty much constant, but they get quieter during the day, louder at night and they usually talk to each other and not directly to me. I have thought that maybe the voices are coming from other people's thoughts being out into my head or maybe they are spirits that are trapped on earth... But I still think the real culprit is the chip

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#6087
Old 09-16-2017, 06:19 AM


maybe you could just try the new med for a short period of time?
just to see how it makes you feel. it may make the other meds
a lesser dose or even no dose of them at all.
I didn't want to inject insulin and wouldn't.
then I finally said okay and I felt GREAT!
it hurts a little but the effect is good.
it's worth a try if you can, Ava.

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#6088
Old 09-16-2017, 10:12 AM

I guess. I haven't really looked into. Sometimes I just don't feel good enough. But I rarely say anything because I know there are people who have it worse then I do.

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#6089
Old 09-16-2017, 02:47 PM

Let me know if you enjoy the game, if you do I can help you out ^^

I think the primary people at risk are the people such as dementia patients and such similar diseases.
It's good that she is helping you out. ^^
I would expect if you wanted to live on your own you would probably benefit from having someone there to prompt you for meds and such. But you'd just need the basics really, med reminders and someone to take you to appointments.
It's good that you're on disability now.

They make you fat? From what you've shared you aren't fat. You look fine.

Yeah, it can cause birth defects with those meds. Is there any particular reason that the child has to be genetically yours? I know there's a lot of kids who don't have homes.

Ah the chip again. What would that benefit though? It doesn't control your behavior/movements. It can't transfer information externally. Even modern chips require an external source for sending information to the brain for people with epilepsy that get that route. (Swiping a card across a sensor)

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#6090
Old 09-16-2017, 07:42 PM

hummy;
I guess I could try it, but with clozapine, you have to have your blood drawn every week because it is very potent.
Since we are moving, (hopefully soon) my psychiatrist isn't too thrilled about the idea of having me try it now because it is a very slow, long process to start taking that medication.

Kirin;
You are still valid, Kirin. :)

Poet;
Okay. I will definitely give the game a few more tries.

That's what I would think. Or people with Alzheimer's or something.
Yeah, I worry about living on my own sometimes. If I am not reminded to take my meds, or shower, or eat, then I usually don't. And I don't have a license, so I can't drive myself places when I need things.

My BMI is within the "normal" range, but I still feel fat. I used to be underweight and I was much, much healthier when I was underweight than I am now.

I worry that because of my diagnosis that they won't let me adopt a child. Also, I've always wanted to get pregnant.

I don't know exactly why... But I know the government has been trying to control us for a while now... First by using fluoride in our water... now, by putting cameras in street lights to watch those people like me. Just feels like no place is safe... and the voices don't help.

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#6091
Old 09-16-2017, 07:56 PM


I don't have any medical anything. Just from my own personal experience. I was determined not to have to give myself a shot. But my body just doesn't work right. I can eat perfect and still have bad day after bad day after bad day. Taking the shot has made a big difference for me and it took me a long time to give in to do it. If it doesn't mess with your body chemistry or your head or anything I really would give it a try just to see if it works for you.

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#6092
Old 09-16-2017, 07:58 PM

Well ava. I had the same issues for a long time.
You have to figure out a way to build a routine. A habit so to speak. I find that makes a huge difference in my ability to follow a routine.

Every day even on my days off I wake up at 8 am. Every single day that I work I shower 5-10 minutes before work. Every night I brush my teeth. Every morning and night I feed the cats.

All of these are habits I had to develop over time and it was vey hard but it has improved my life so much.
Having alarms makes a big difference. If you train yourself to follow a phone alarm the moment it goes off you'll do great in starting that routine. Plus if you get side tracked the calendar should have your routine on it.
Starting is the hard part.

When you start riding your bike places I'm sure that your weight will balance out.

To ideally get pregnant you would need to find a partner who will help you raise it.
I did read something interesting though. Pregnancy in some reduces symptoms of schizophrenia.

Fluoride is good for your teeth that's why it's in the water. The cameras are mostly for catching people who run red lights. I think the majority of it is automated and does not include a human viewing the footage.

A shot hummy? Which kind?

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#6093
Old 09-16-2017, 08:22 PM

I have read that we must practice the same routine of things for 15 days before it becomes a habit.

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#6094
Old 09-16-2017, 08:56 PM


Muscle memory is a wonderful thing

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#6095
Old 09-16-2017, 09:38 PM

15 days huh? That sounds about right based in my experiences. And if you screw up sometimes you have to start from scratch sometimes it goes right back to routine.

Like brushing my teeth if i miss a day it screws up everything.

Ava - reading about a study and found something you may want to read.
Quote:
During the six-month monitoring period, attacks were observed characterized by auditory and visual hallucinations, irritability, insomnia, and psychomotor agitation starting two days before menstruation.
This is from monitoring a patient with schizophrenia. We observe the same thing. An "attack" so to speak occurring 1-2 days before menstrual bleeding.

Last edited by The Wandering Poet; 09-16-2017 at 09:45 PM..

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#6096
Old 09-17-2017, 01:45 AM

hummy; I guess I could give it a try... Once I get to LA.


Poet; I suck at routines. It feels like the moment I get the hang of a routine, something goes wrong and then I forget the routine the next day. I will try setting alarms on my phone, though. I used to have a calendar to mark off my period days, back when we didn't have apps on our phones to measure that. It helped, but I find that because we are moving, I don't have a place to hang up a calendar.

I think I would be okay raising a baby by myself.

I don't trust that the government is that concerned about our teeth that they would put fluoride in water... I am pretty sure they only care about mind control.

That's really interesting, Poet! So I guess hormones really do make a difference for schizophrenia. That is crazy. I wonder what I could do to fix it, though..

Inzane; 15 days seems like a short amount of time to form a habit :o

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#6097
Old 09-17-2017, 04:47 AM

I do that too...
You just have to start the routine all over again. It sucks, but if you fall down you simply must dust yourself off and keep going.

Perhaps you would be okay, but a child has been shown to need a male and a female role model with which to look up to. If no male role models are available in their lives, they are missing something important.

If the government had mind control they wouldn't be able to agree on how to apply it... have you heard those people? They would argue over the color of the sky
But it isn't the government high up nutjobs that manage those sorts of things. We are but a small ant to them.

The people who manage your water are the EPA (Environmental Protection Agency). Basically they make sure the water is safe to drink, and does not harm the environment.

As for the flouride itself. The body automatically filters out any excess. If it were used to control minds it would do a very bad job.
There is however a drug that can be used for mind control. But given the way it functions, you would be able to tell very easily any person under it's effects. Being obedient to any and every command no matter what. But of course some people are stupid enough to do exactly that sometimes so it's hard to tell.

I think the best way to regulate hormones would be to regulate your period. As hummy mentioned you may want to consider the shot. It will help prevent pregnancy, and should be easy enough to remind yourself to do through alarms or the like as it's only once every 3 months.

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#6098
Old 09-18-2017, 12:55 AM

It's so much easier said than done though... :c I literally slept all day today. I was cramping, I fell asleep at 11pmish and woke up at 10amish, fell back to sleep later on in the day and pretty much stayed sleeping all day. I will try to set a schedule for myself, though...

My baby would have plenty of male role models to choose from... I would have male friends around them. I understand, though... I just don't know if I could raise a baby with someone else, I get too tired of people too quickly.

The government probably wants us to think that they are just innocent and dumb, but I am sure they are much smarter than they lead us to believe.

Doesn't fluoride in water harm the environment though?! I heard that fluoride in water was killing kangaroos in Australia?! I don't remember where I read that, but I am currently too lazy to look it up right now.

I don't want to be put on birth control... :( I don't want to prevent pregnancy.

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#6099
Old 09-18-2017, 02:16 AM

Well Ava, it's a constant uphill battle sometimes. But as time goes on you'll pick up certain habits, but others will be harder to get. Just takes persistence on any day you can.

Well, while you might, you seem to tolerate us pretty well. What about a person makes you grow tired of them?
It's quite likely the child would fixate on one of those people as their role model.
It's an interesting idea to ponder though. As many single mothers struggle I wonder if maybe there is a special way that it has to be done.

Well our current president isn't innocent but he is dumb...
The rest are powered primarily by greed. Whatever makes them more money. There are quite a number of intelligent people in there, but sadly they waste it away with warping the meanings of words and phrases for their own personal gain. They have their moments though, like when they made gay marriage a human right.

Well, too much of anything is fatal. Too little of others can also be fatal. Life is a delicate balance.
Take water for example. Too little water is fatal. Too much water is also fatal.
Now lets take Flouride. I found data stating that there is 1mg of Flouride per 1 liter of water. Toxicity for Flouride is 1 gram. So you would need to drink 1000 liters of water. Basically you'd overdose on the water first.

Looking at the thing about the Kangaroos... that was caused by a factory, so the toxicity was likely caused by factory waste... which is toxic in general.

It's not a permanent thing. Once you are at the point in your life where you are ready to start rearing a child, you would talk to your doctor about it and this would give them time to figure out your other meds before conception.
But during the time you are on it, it lessens your periods, and could potentially help with the voices. (Though still important to talk to the psychiatrist about it first)
Plus, once the child was born you could return to it to prevent a second until (if wanted) you were ready. As the body needs to heal between children.

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#6100
Old 09-18-2017, 02:40 AM


Ava~well I would do a little research.
maybe find a blog/chatroom about the drug.
or even the maybe about your diagnosis.
even if you just lurk and don't post.
it might put things in another light.

 


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