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Zira Angel
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Old 06-12-2014, 01:00 PM

Yeah, depression was... It is hard to describe. Empty, I guess. If I had to put a word to it. Empty. That's how I felt. Empty.

I don't even remember how we figured it out. /shrugs/ I just don't eat acidic food anymore. I miss orange juice :C

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:01 PM

I hate those empty feelings. Mine never lasted for over a week but when it happens it sucks.

Oh wow. I like slightly sour foods, not being able to eat them...so no acidic foods at all? Not even in really small amounts? :c

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:05 PM

Not even in tiny amounts. Mom put a tiny bit of vinegar in foods, and I had to yell at her to stop doing it. No matter how much she says it will 'cook out' I will get violently sick.

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:06 PM

Depression sucks everything D: I had a mild one for sometime and what can I say? I'm glad I'm smiling and laughing like there's no tomorrow now.
Aww no acid? You should be my mum, because she doesn't like acidic foods. I like them a lot XD

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:07 PM

I am not gonna be your mom, Lexibug >:I

Yeah, depression is horrible.

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:09 PM

During my 'down' episodes I literally do not want to do anything. I just want to sit there, undisturbed, and just...I dunno, exist or something. My mind's usually pretty blank too. I just sit there and feel utterly unmotivated.

Oh, that's really bad then. I'm not sure if I'm allergic to anything though I did get a really bad itch that one time I had bad seafood...

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:10 PM

you can have my num's taste buds then
Yes. That feeling. I hate it hate it hate it.

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:11 PM

Stupid depression. :c

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:12 PM

I wrote a.. fic thing. While horribly depressed. The empty feeling. The main character was in a heavy depression exactly like me. I had NO CLUE I was depressed. It took my friends and readers talking about how HORRIBLE it was for the character to be feeling absolutely nothing for me to realize I should probably climb out of the numbness.

I dind't feel anything, so I just.. was there. A wall that spoke.

It was just...

/shrugs/

Empty.

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:14 PM

Huh, you managed to write a fic while depressed. I probably would've just gone through the motions every day and not be doing anything productive at all. Just existing.

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:18 PM

My 'existing' was getting on the computer, and writing with Tashu. If I hadn't had him, I uh... hahaha.. um... I guess I would have actually jumped off a bridge.

I hate the sensation of falling. It scares and terrifies me. For a long time in my depression, that was the only feeling I had other than pain. Falling made me feel SOMETHING. So.. bridge, dropping hard, etc.

But Tash was my anchor. Not that I've told him. He knows I love and care for him. I don't want him to be burdened with the knowledge that I had him to hold onto. Not whenn he had so much ELSE he had to do.

There's a fic someone else wrote that has the feeling I had. Like... walking in a dream, nothing under your feet as you go. That was me. I can try finding the fic? Harry Potter.

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:23 PM

D: post it if you can find it, Zira!
I...remember that I completely got off a..uh..guy good for me, because well, he was married

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:26 PM

Oh, Tashu is one of my internet husbands. He's a sweetspark, and I love him. He even says he loves me back now. He never used to in the beginning, too defensive. Which was fine, since he thought I just threw the word around at the time.

Here's the fanfic. It is VERY long, just to warn you.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/3551038...-Heir-of-Magic

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:32 PM

Bookmarked!
Tashu is a person? I thought it was a character

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:35 PM

Hahaha. No XD

He's a person. I write with him!

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:46 PM

Harry Potter was so OOC in that fic I stopped reading after the part where Draco Malfoy woke up from his healing sleep. >_>;

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:47 PM

Hahhaa. Understandable :V

I did say it felt like my depression. That is NOT ic for Harry in the least.

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:47 PM

Depression... Yeah. -huggles everyone-


Quote:
Originally Posted by Antagonist View Post
The second set of photos' hair is about the length I'm at, though it's hard to tell because I've got semi-curly hair so it just looks super messy instead.
That's my hair right now. I took that photo just yesterday. We could be twins! Just because of our hair lengths.
My hair has its own mind. My hair gets to decide if it's crazy one day and prim and behave the next. xD

---------- Post added 06-12-2014 at 09:49 PM ----------

The two times I went and visited Zira's fan fic story with Tashu is when Tashu also leaves the chat.

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Old 06-12-2014, 01:51 PM

I have problems with OOC characters unless there's been an explanation (that isn't rushed) about why they're like that...that one was just, there.

But yeah, just the beginning was depressing enough.


@Ses: Same here. It's everywhere.

Zira Angel
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Old 06-12-2014, 02:00 PM

Tashu is just waking up now. We're in skype, talking about random things o3o

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Old 06-12-2014, 02:02 PM

Tashu reminds me of Tash. xD Tash was a friend from GaiaOnline, I don't remember much about him. All I remember is he's Finnish. xD

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Old 06-12-2014, 02:05 PM

Finnish = Finland people?
I went to deposit a little fat.

Zira Angel
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Old 06-12-2014, 02:14 PM

My Tash is not finnish. He's American.

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Old 06-12-2014, 02:17 PM

@Lexadis - Yes. Finland People = Finnish = Kimi Räikkönen

@Zira - Ah, I see. =3

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Old 06-12-2014, 02:27 PM

Kimi? Isn't that someone Amane was referring to?

---------- Post added 06-12-2014 at 07:57 PM ----------

Ooh no he is that f1 racer, right?

 



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