Whatever. -.- And stop telling me not to get mad and frustrated! That just makes it worse.... So what if I am upset... this is why I never let my feelings out... because people just tell me that I should not be showing it... and getting upset... I GIVE UP... I JUST FREAKING GIVE UP!! I guess I'm just supposed to be this robot who never shows any emotion. Sorry that I even spoke up. I just will leave. Because clearly anyone who goes against norms right now isn't supposed to be here.

Originally Posted by Ravensdance

Your welcome Hummy. Hugs.

i wasn't posting much when i saw it on my profile
and i meant to say thank you then i got sidetracked
it really did make me smile, your pictures always do
but this one was extra special to me, teal AND hummingbirds!

Originally Posted by hummy

i wasn't posting much when i saw it on my profile
and i meant to say thank you then i got sidetracked
it really did make me smile, your pictures always do
but this one was extra special to me, teal AND hummingbirds!

Thats ok. I understand. I get side tracked and distracted all the time. :)

Originally Posted by hummy

throw something unbreakable
toss your pillow at the wall if it will help
maybe eat a little something or take a nap
or listen to the relaxing rainfall soundtrack?
embrace your moods instead of hiding them.

I'm trying to wait till after 4 to eat as I don't want to eat breakfast foods and the cafeteria serves breakfast till 4 pm.
And I've tried things like that before, they don't work. :(
I want to throw something like my phone or laptop - which I won't. But I've come close to doing it before.
I try to, but people just tell me that I need to stop showing them... OR to calm down, which honestly is the worst thing that someone can tell me when I'm upset, because it just makes it worse.

"AHHH! IT'S A BEAR!"
(Talking to the bear) "Carry me! You're cute. Let's get married!"
"[TERRIFIED BEAR SOUNDS; BEAR RUNS AWAY]"

I didn't say to stop getting upset, either~ I don't think I'm a bad person because you all like dogs while I think they're terrifying. And boy, can you guys prattle on about dogs! We don't think ill of you for only liking soundtracks and classical music. We don't have the same tastes, no, but we're certainly not downing yours! Fear not. (✿◠‿◠)

But telling me that I need to stop being upset and frustrated... -.- It's like the way that I'm feeling isn't valid and I'm just supposed to shut up and take it... -.- NO. I'm sick of feeling like that. I get that may not be what you're saying. But see it from my POV... put yourself into my shoes. Stop acting like your words don't hurt. Because they do. It's not just about me. It's about everyone and them not realizing that words do hurt, and I just refuse to just sit down and take it... and telling me that I need to stop it, and all that... No... I've just accepted things for too long, and I refuse to be the one who people see - at least how I see it -as the person that they can just treat like they're supposed to be this emotionless robot who never has feelings. I've been that person for too long. and I REFUSE TO BE THAT PERSON ANYMORE!!! And I know that may not be how y'all see me, but it sure is how I see me, and how people have treated me.... -.- That I'm supposed to be a big girl and never show emotions and never act out, and never again have tantrums... -.-

And right now... I am pissed off and I feel like my feelings are just being brushed to the side like how I feel doesn't truly matter...-.-

Originally Posted by nemo.love_22

I'm trying to wait till after 4 to eat as I don't want to eat breakfast foods and the cafeteria serves breakfast till 4 pm.
And I've tried things like that before, they don't work. :(
I want to throw something like my phone or laptop - which I won't. But I've come close to doing it before.
I try to, but people just tell me that I need to stop showing them... OR to calm down, which honestly is the worst thing that someone can tell me when I'm upset, because it just makes it worse.

wow, breakfast until four would make me unhappy
i'm not a breakfast person most of the time
do you role play?
i'm very new at it but i would be happy to do one with you
you are more than welcome to express your emotions/feelings
all i want is for everyone one to feel welcome to be themselves in here
RAK is all about kindness, toward everyone, in a good mood or a bad mood.
how you take the things people say is entirely up to you.
i know everyone takes things differently, it's hard to know what people mean without seeing gestures or hearing the tone of their voice.
but, honestly, i don't see people thinking you are a bad person in anything that they said today.

Originally Posted by Amane

I didn't say to stop getting upset, either~ I don't think I'm a bad person because you all like dogs while I think they're terrifying. And boy, can you guys prattle on about dogs! We don't think ill of you for only liking soundtracks and classical music. We don't have the same tastes, no, but we're certainly not downing yours! Fear not. (✿◠‿◠)

Originally Posted by nemo.love_22

But telling me that I need to stop being upset and frustrated... -.- It's like the way that I'm feeling isn't valid and I'm just supposed to shut up and take it... -.- NO. I'm sick of feeling like that. (1)I get that may not be what you're saying. (2)But see it from my POV... put yourself into my shoes. (3)Stop acting like your words don't hurt. Because they do. It's not just about me. It's about everyone and them not realizing that words do hurt, and I just refuse to just sit down and take it... and telling me that I need to stop it, and all that... No... (4)I've just accepted things for too long, and I refuse to be the one who people see - at least how I see it -as the person that they can just treat like they're supposed to be this emotionless robot who never has feelings. I've been that person for too long. and I REFUSE TO BE THAT PERSON ANYMORE!!! And I know that may not be how y'all see me, but it sure is how I see me, and how people have treated me.... -.- That I'm supposed to be a big girl and never show emotions and never act out, and never again have tantrums... -.-

Underlining for emphasis. No one told you that. :)

(1) Good. It certainly isn't! ^^b

(2) I am aware that you've been in a bad mood for, what, years? because things just will not go right, and all that happens is it just gets worse. I am aware that you pretend to be just fine, but you really want to scream, bash your head into a wall, and kick things. Fully aware! I have not forgotten, rest assured.

(3) What about my, or anyone's, words hurt you?
Earlier I stated that I didn't know heat could exist without at least some humidity, which is why I assumed California would have humidity often due to it being warmer there. Interesting little fact of the day for me!
Just a little bit ago, I said that I can listen to any music that's catchy enough. One or two others agreed. Never, ever, though, did we say that it was stupid to like only one kind of music. "I only like this one kind of music." "Really? I like several." That's what happened!
Plus, you know very well (very, VERY well) how much I just LOVE K-pop. I like almost nothing else. Yeah, I said I like a few non-K-pop songs, but I'd be ridiculous to call someone else a bad person for only liking one type of music. Hypocrite much? ‼ That's what I'd be!

(4) What are we giving you to accept that is making you upset? Please do explain. ^^

Originally Posted by Ravensdance

Thats ok. I understand. I get side tracked and distracted all the time. :)

but it was important to me to let you know how much that meant
i was feeling awful and it really did make me feel better
i so would hang that up as a poster
its beautiful
where do you find such pretty pictures?

Originally Posted by hummy

wow, breakfast until four would make me unhappy
i'm not a breakfast person most of the time
do you role play?
i'm very new at it but i would be happy to do one with you
you are more than welcome to express your emotions/feelings
all i want is for everyone one to feel welcome to be themselves in here
RAK is all about kindness, toward everyone, in a good mood or a bad mood.
how you take the things people say is entirely up to you.
i know everyone takes things differently, it's hard to know what people mean without seeing gestures or hearing the tone of their voice.
but, honestly, i don't see people thinking you are a bad person in anything that they said today.

I used to role play, but I don't have the time right now to try to add in something else onto my plate.

I try, I just don't feel like I can express myself. D:

I can't get into RP. =w= I'm bad at imitating people. As for my own characters, I don't like pretending to be them because for some reason it feels weird.

Originally Posted by nemo.love_22

I used to role play, but I don't have the time right now to try to add in something else onto my plate.

I try, I just don't feel like I can express myself. D:

well if you wanna do one
like when you feel overwhelmed
we could post there
i was trying to think of something that would help
i don't want to add anything stressful to your very full plate
hmmm, maybe we need to get you a bigger plate =) *humor attempt*

New addition to desktop slide show pops up.
Feel need to celebrate shiny new picture.

I'm just saying that is how I FEEL! -.- But I get it... Emotionless robot here, I guess.

It doesn't matter what I think or feel... It doesn't. -.-

See the way that I see it - and you may not see it because of your pov, but the way that things are worded makes me feel like people ALWAYS talk down to me.

And I don't get the wording of your last question.

Basically I just feel like my feelings aren't valid and that people act like I am WAY out of line for feeling the way that I do... And you know what. Y'all will think what you want to think... WHO cares what I think. I'll just go and sit in my corner and not express how I feel... because all it does is make matters worse, because in the end, how I feel doesn't matter.

---------- Post added 02-01-2014 at 03:39 PM ----------

Originally Posted by hummy

well if you wanna do one
like when you feel overwhelmed
we could post there
i was trying to think of something that would help
i don't want to add anything stressful to your very full plate
hmmm, maybe we need to get you a bigger plate =) *humor attempt*

I just am not feeling creative at all, and I do need a bigger plate. Mine is far too small. Or I need to start cutting stresses out, although that would be everything right now. And oh joy, my roommate is home. And wants to talk, but I just want to curl up in the corner and ignore the world. D:

Originally Posted by hummy

but it was important to me to let you know how much that meant
i was feeling awful and it really did make me feel better
i so would hang that up as a poster
its beautiful
where do you find such pretty pictures?

Just browsing the internet. Art has always been a love of mine.

Im glad it made you feel better. :)

Originally Posted by Amane

I am aware that you've been in a bad mood for, what, years? because things just will not go right, and all that happens is it just gets worse. I am aware that you pretend to be just fine, but you really want to scream, bash your head into a wall, and kick things. Fully aware! I have not forgotten, rest assured.

I know that you're upset, "emotionless robot." Emotions seen! b

I asked what you think and feel by asking what hurt you, wouldn't y'say? Something has clearly been left out. If we've said something to you that was deeply upsetting/offending, we're not seeing it, so this is your chance to step up and explain EXACTLY how we're being rude to you!

Not doing the same as you = talking down to you? Please do tell why you feel this way. ( 　ﾟ_ゝﾟ)a?

You said you've accepted things for too long and won't anymore. What are we giving you to accept?

You feel like your feelings aren't valid. What are those feelings, Nemo?

---------- Post added 02-01-2014 at 06:54 PM ----------

Suddenly say you're going 3D in a skit.
Audience is given "snowballs" to throw onto the stage!

That is so awesome!

Just telling me that I need to not be frustrated or upset and the way I express myself is wrong. You may not see that as being upsetting, but honestly to me, the fact that I have GONE MY ENTIRE LIFE basically being told that the way I feel is wrong, and I need to try to conform better, and that I'm not supposed to show feelings. And just not do anything out of line... and the fact that I keep having to say this... again and again. I feel like people say they hear me.. BUT they do not. I just give up. I can't keep doing this. -.-
And the thing is I have been trying to explain and no one really gets it. I'm just TIRED of having to repeat myself over and over again. But whatever. My feelings clearly don't matter. Whatever.
You do not want to open up the box that is my feelings. That would be a bad bad bad thing to do. That has gotten me into trouble before. and no, I am not going there. You can't get me to do that. -.-

You want to know what has been done - it is the fact that I feel lied to. That I feel like people tell me "We hear you" yet, to me, they clearly don't because I keep having to repeat myself over and over again.

Fine, you want to know how I'm feeling... -.- Tip of the iceberg here.
People say that they want to know what's wrong, and as soon as they feel like they're helping me, or have done something that 'makes the problem better' (and yes, I have put that in quotes) they just walk away. Because THEY HAVE DONE THEIR PART and made themselves feel good... they just walk away leaving me feeling just as bad, or WORSE than I was feeling. I'm feeling abandoned, alone, and frustrated, stressed, insecure... and the list goes on and on and on...

And you saying that, what you've quoted just makes me feel like I'm being patronized. You may not see it that way, but that is how I see it... and honestly that just upsets me even more... -.- It makes me just question everything.

But I get it. I'll just be the stupid one in the corner who never understands anything because apparently it's ok to belittle her.... That's what I'm here for of course? *sarcasm*

Originally Posted by nemo.love_22

I'm just saying that is how I FEEL! -.- But I get it... Emotionless robot here, I guess.

It doesn't matter what I think or feel... It doesn't. -.-

See the way that I see it - and you may not see it because of your pov, but the way that things are worded makes me feel like people ALWAYS talk down to me.

And I don't get the wording of your last question.

Basically I just feel like my feelings aren't valid and that people act like I am WAY out of line for feeling the way that I do... And you know what. Y'all will think what you want to think... WHO cares what I think. I'll just go and sit in my corner and not express how I feel... because all it does is make matters worse, because in the end, how I feel doesn't matter.

---------- Post added 02-01-2014 at 03:39 PM ----------


I just am not feeling creative at all, and I do need a bigger plate. Mine is far too small. Or I need to start cutting stresses out, although that would be everything right now. And oh joy, my roommate is home. And wants to talk, but I just want to curl up in the corner and ignore the world. D:

well, mene shouldn't be adding stress for you.
i love mene because RL gives me enough crap
maybe she will have good things to talk about
=)

Originally Posted by hummy

well, mene shouldn't be adding stress for you.
i love mene because RL gives me enough crap
maybe she will have good things to talk about
=)

Nope it was all to complain about how much stuff she has to do in the next few months regarding dental work and how she's overwhelmed. -.- Just goes to add on that I'm just here for people to dump their problems on.

Originally Posted by Ravensdance

Just browsing the internet. Art has always been a love of mine.

Im glad it made you feel better. :)

do you draw?
yep, it did
you never know what makes someone's day

---------- Post added 02-02-2014 at 12:09 AM ----------

Originally Posted by nemo.love_22

Nope it was all to complain about how much stuff she has to do in the next few months regarding dental work and how she's overwhelmed. -.- Just goes to add on that I'm just here for people to dump their problems on.

let her know all you have on your plate
maybe let her know sometimes her adding her woe's doesn't help
maybe make some kind of 'no dumping zone' time

People are stupid when they say we need to stop showing Our emotions, that they make us look weak.

Our Emotions, Our Free thoughts, Are the only thing that separates us from Machines.

Originally Posted by hummy

do you draw?
yep, it did
you never know what makes someone's day

---------- Post added 02-02-2014 at 12:09 AM ----------

let her know all you have on your plate
maybe let her know sometimes her adding her woe's doesn't help
maybe make some kind of 'no dumping zone' time

I've tried to explain what's going on with me, and all of that - but she has selective sight I've decided (not selective hearing because she's deaf. :P) and only sees what she wants to see. And at the same time, I hate saying no to her, but I do need to get better at setting boundaries. I just suck at it.

Originally Posted by nemo.love_22

(1)Just telling me that I need to not be frustrated or upset and the way I express myself is wrong. (2)You may not see that as being upsetting, but honestly to me, the fact that (1)I have GONE MY ENTIRE LIFE basically being told that the way I feel is wrong, and I need to try to conform better, and that I'm not supposed to show feelings. And just not do anything out of line... and the fact that (3)I keep having to say this... again and again. (4)I feel like people say they hear me.. BUT they do not. I just give up. I can't keep doing this. -.-
And the thing is (3)I have been trying to explain and no one really gets it. I'm just TIRED of having to repeat myself over and over again. But whatever. My feelings clearly don't matter. Whatever.
(4)You do not want to open up the box that is my feelings. That would be a bad bad bad thing to do. That has gotten me into trouble before. and no, I am not going there. You can't get me to do that. -.-

You want to know what has been done - it is the fact that I feel lied to. That I feel like people tell me "We hear you" yet, to me, they clearly don't because I keep having to repeat myself over and over again.

Fine, you want to know how I'm feeling... -.- Tip of the iceberg here.
(5)People say that they want to know what's wrong, and as soon as they feel like they're helping me, or have done something that 'makes the problem better' (and yes, I have put that in quotes) they just walk away. Because THEY HAVE DONE THEIR PART and made themselves feel good... they just walk away leaving me feeling just as bad, or WORSE than I was feeling. I'm feeling abandoned, alone, and frustrated, stressed, insecure...

(6)And you saying that, what you've quoted just makes me feel like I'm being patronized. You may not see it that way, but that is how I see it... and honestly that just upsets me even more... -.- It makes me just question everything.

But I get it. (7)I'll just be the stupid one in the corner who never understands anything because apparently it's ok to belittle her.... That's what I'm here for of course? *sarcasm*

(1) I didn't say you shouldn't be. I asked why you were. I wouldn't tell you to stop it before I even know what's going on!

(2) I do, actually. People who tell me not to cry because I'm not a little kid are stupidfaces. = w=

(3) You keep saying it again and again, but, like I said, no one told you not to be upset or that you were wrong. Someone did when you were here earlier, but I'm willing to put that aside and only talk about what's at hand now. Nobody in what happened now told you to calm down or anything of the sort.

(4) Okay. I fully respect your choice and understand your reasoning. I don't like being told I'm going against rules! How do people do that and feel nothing from it?
However, the fact that we do not know your feelings is why your feelings seem to not matter. They are unknown, not ignored. You have said before that even when people say they're listening, they're not, and therefore you'd rather not tell them.
You have chosen not to tell your feelings because you get in trouble and it feels like no one really cares. Is that right?

(5) I would like to say that I would be guilty of this, not because I did something and feel good so now I'm done, but because I really have nothing to say when people tell me about their troubles. When things get too serious, I have to lighten things up again or go silent and leave. I wish I could say something, but I have no idea what on Earth to say other than, "Wow, that's really bad; I'm so sorry." That feels like a disgusting reply to an emotion-packed, from the heart "wall of text" because it's so simple and short.

(6) Are you talking about me replying in this manner or when I quoted what I remember of how you've said you've felt for a long time? Or both?
As for the latter, I see what you're saying. I did not intend for it to sound that way. But please know I remember what you've said before and I'm not telling you that you should never get offended or mad at anything.

(7) I'm sure no one here would ever intentionally belittle you. ^^ The whole reason I keep going on about this is because I asked HOW you understood our words, not to tell you you didn't understand and you're wrong and need to shut up. I wouldn't do that!

Originally Posted by nemo.love_22

I've tried to explain what's going on with me, and all of that - but she has selective sight I've decided (not selective hearing because she's deaf. :P) and only sees what she wants to see. And at the same time, I hate saying no to her, but I do need to get better at setting boundaries. I just suck at it.

yeah setting boundaries is difficulst
but it's something that needs to be done
no need to have her adding more problems/stress on you

---------- Post added 02-02-2014 at 12:38 AM ----------

Originally Posted by Andraus

People are stupid when they say we need to stop showing Our emotions, that they make us look weak.

Our Emotions, Our Free thoughts, Are the only thing that separates us from Machines.

hiya, Andraus

Holy shit walls of text.