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LiviInLove
I'm a Buzy Bee!
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04-19-2014, 02:25 AM
*huggles for llonka*
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Elmira Swift
Curator of Alluvium
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04-19-2014, 02:27 AM
I find I am okay with mess IF I am busy doing something else. Once I am not busy, the chaos - not nasty, just messy - catches my attention and I start barking at all of the perpetrators. Because I know it was clean before I parked myself elsewhere :) Some of it is the aspie thing being able to focus solely on one or two things, but I've finally gotten to a point where I let things go if it's necessary. Your mom knows your standards, so I'm sure she can help not only with Becca, but the house as well. I'm glad you're being gentle with yourself right now
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LiviInLove
I'm a Buzy Bee!
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04-19-2014, 02:30 AM
I snap at people even when it's clean - especially now.  My poor husband. He's been putting up with so much lately.
I do trust mum more with cleaning than my mother-in-law as she doesn't know my standards quite as well as mum knows them. But right now - I'll take anything and if it isn't right I can see if they can get it done to my standards. Trying to just stay as relaxed as I can. Two more weeks - I can do this for two weeks, yeah?
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steelmagghia
Not ready for school to start!
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04-19-2014, 02:31 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by LiviInLove
Now to figure out where I put my phone so I can call my in-laws to see if it works for them to come up this weekend to help us out a bit. Plus I know they want to spend some time with their granddaughter.
My darned phone always seems to hide from me. :/
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Haha, silly phones. They are the best hiders.
Quote:
Originally Posted by llonka
I'm always cranky and a big grouch.
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You wouldn't be if hubby wasn't such a jerk.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Elmira Swift
I find I am okay with mess IF I am busy doing something else. Once I am not busy, the chaos - not nasty, just messy - catches my attention and I start barking at all of the perpetrators. Because I know it was clean before I parked myself elsewhere :) Some of it is the aspie thing being able to focus solely on one or two things, but I've finally gotten to a point where I let things go if it's necessary. Your mom knows your standards, so I'm sure she can help not only with Becca, but the house as well. I'm glad you're being gentle with yourself right now 
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I am the messiest person ever. I make nests.
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LiviInLove
I'm a Buzy Bee!
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04-19-2014, 02:34 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by steelmagghia
Haha, silly phones. They are the best hiders.
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They really are! Silly phone, we aren't playing hide and seek! xD
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steelmagghia
Not ready for school to start!
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04-19-2014, 02:36 AM
I think phones were nightjars in a past life.
Last edited by zigbigadorlube; 11-03-2014 at 02:14 AM..
Reason: Ghost Hunt Game
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llonka
Momma to the Crazies!
☆☆☆ Penpal Moderator
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04-19-2014, 02:38 AM
It's okay Steel. This too shall pass, hopefully sooner than later.
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LiviInLove
I'm a Buzy Bee!
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04-19-2014, 02:38 AM
What are Nightjars?
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Elmira Swift
Curator of Alluvium
☆ Penpal
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04-19-2014, 02:58 AM
Things with my current hubster have not always been rosy ~ but they have improved. Not sure if it's because we're older and past the midlife crisis/crises hump or not. Lately, he's gone back to thinking I can read his mind - which is true about 10% of the time - and I often resort to the blank look. "Use your words, honey" usually does the trick. Sometimes it's hard to articulate what you're feeling particularly when you have a history of grievances to unload.
My advice is this: Pick your battles. Until you know what is happening you're stressing yourself out. If your worries are justified you know what to do next. I know it's easy for me to say this because I am not you and don't know everything that's happening, but keeping score and considering retaliation is going to erode you emotionally to the point of exhaustion and a sense of futility in most if not all aspects of your life. You will feel powerless and like a victim, not knowing what to do next. I say this because I have been there and owning the fact that I have control over how I react gave me back the power to make choices.
I took hubster aside and we talked. I found out he was convinced I was going to leave him and he would not see our son again. Once that myth was busted (because I would not ever keep our son out of his life unless he was dealing with people I felt were unsafe), we focused on working together.
It's not always perfect, but we are constantly making more progress than we were even a year ago.
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steelmagghia
Not ready for school to start!
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04-19-2014, 03:08 AM
Livi: Nightjars are also called Poor-wills and night hawks. They're freaking masters of disguise. And they look like muppets up close.
Elmira: I am not the marrying type, so I'm probably not good at it in general.
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LiviInLove
I'm a Buzy Bee!
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04-19-2014, 03:10 AM
Steel: I learn something new every day! That's cool and I agree with your theory about phones having been nightjars in a past life.  So freaking good at hiding they are!
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Elmira Swift
Curator of Alluvium
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04-19-2014, 03:10 AM
Like any relationship, including friendship, there are fine lines we have to walk. Figuring out boundaries, deciding whether or not to keep someone in our lives, all that good stuff. It's tough when you factor kids, property, and time together.
Anyhow, I'm pretty fried for the day and am not sure if I'm making much sense :)
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LiviInLove
I'm a Buzy Bee!
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04-19-2014, 03:12 AM
You are making complete sense to me, Elmira.  I totally agree with what you're saying!
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steelmagghia
Not ready for school to start!
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04-19-2014, 03:22 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by LiviInLove
Steel: I learn something new every day! That's cool and I agree with your theory about phones having been nightjars in a past life.  So freaking good at hiding they are!
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I'm pretty much a walking animal encyclopedia.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Elmira Swift
Like any relationship, including friendship, there are fine lines we have to walk. Figuring out boundaries, deciding whether or not to keep someone in our lives, all that good stuff. It's tough when you factor kids, property, and time together.
Anyhow, I'm pretty fried for the day and am not sure if I'm making much sense :)
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You make sense, dear. I'm good at the relationship part, I just get tired of the romantic relationships. They just require so much more effort for me.
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LiviInLove
I'm a Buzy Bee!
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04-19-2014, 03:27 AM
That's pretty cool though! :D
Ok, I'm off to try to get some sleep. I'm falling asleep at my computer. See y'all around!
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steelmagghia
Not ready for school to start!
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04-19-2014, 03:33 AM
Me too hon. It's our Easter celebration tomorrow.
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llonka
Momma to the Crazies!
☆☆☆ Penpal Moderator
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04-19-2014, 03:34 AM
Sorry my father in law called so i was talking to him. I guess when hubby gets home i will update you on what happened.
Night!
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steelmagghia
Not ready for school to start!
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04-19-2014, 03:37 AM
I hope things are getting a bit better, hon. *hugs*
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LiviInLove
I'm a Buzy Bee!
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04-19-2014, 05:08 PM
*hides in here*
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steelmagghia
Not ready for school to start!
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04-19-2014, 05:09 PM
*snuggles with Livi*
How is it going hon?
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LiviInLove
I'm a Buzy Bee!
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04-19-2014, 05:11 PM
Right now - not too good. I just feel like crying, and screaming. And I know that not sleeping too well last night isn't helping.
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steelmagghia
Not ready for school to start!
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04-19-2014, 05:26 PM
Lack of sleep always makes me really emotional. But what else is making you emotional? Just the bed rest?
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LiviInLove
I'm a Buzy Bee!
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04-19-2014, 05:28 PM
The bed rest is the tip of it - I just am feeling so overwhelmed by everything that's happened in the last week. Lack of sleep never helps.  Sleep can be so annoying at times.
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steelmagghia
Not ready for school to start!
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04-19-2014, 05:30 PM
I'm sorry sweety. I wish I could help you out! But it's just a month more to go, right?
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LiviInLove
I'm a Buzy Bee!
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04-19-2014, 05:31 PM
Two weeks - my doctor told me that I will be let off of full bed rest (hopefully), but will still be under strict orders to take it easy till she's born.
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