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Aimless.Wanderer
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#401
Old 04-04-2015, 12:30 PM

@ Vin - I'm sorry about your situation. I give you my best wishes Have you been taking a little time for yourself and just taking a few deep breaths? I know that you probably have a lot on your plate right now in terms of family and you can't really do that, but I found that it helps going into a separate room and just calming your mind. Sleep would probably be really helpful too. I don't know if that helps

Vinny XIII
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#402
Old 04-04-2015, 04:39 PM

Thanks Aim, maybe that is what I need. I was finally able to get some sleep so I feel better physically, but yesterday my sister-in-law Melissa passed away at 5am. In once sense it's a good thing because that means she's not in anymore pain. Her liver and kidneys were shutting down and for the last five days she wasn't able to respond to anything. But it's still sad to lose her since she was only 47. I feel so bad for my brother, nephews, and niece.
What's even worse is my mom still has to tell my brother she's got a brain tumor. We're gonna go to a doctor out of town to see what kind of tumor it is on the 10th. Everyone keeps telling me it'll be okay, and I'm grateful they're trying to comfort me, but there's still that little piece in the back of my mind that wonders what if this time my moms not so lucky.
Add all that to the stress from Joey's side of the family where Grandma Shirley's dementia is getting worse, Grandma Doris is in renal failure (I think I spelt that right?), his mom not handling the stress well and either taking it out on him and his brother or acting like no one else is stressed about anything, and then taxes are coming up and since they own their business and we don't have any kids it's guaranteed we're gonna owe at least $1,000 dollars in taxes.
Oh and if dealing with drama from Melissa's side of the family wasn't enough, my other sister-in-law Amber is trying to cause drama on my side of the family by saying moms posting stuff on facebook that she isn't.
*sigh* The thing I think sucks the most with all that though is the fact I texted Fish yesterday and she asked what she could do to help, then I asked if I could come over if she didn't have any plans and I haven't heard anything from her since then.
Sorry this is such a novel hun but maybe I do need to do something for myself for a bit. Maybe if I can get the money I'll go get my hair cut or something.


Anyways, how's everyone been?

salvete
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#403
Old 04-05-2015, 02:02 AM

Rest in peace, Melissa :( she was so young. Sorry to hear about the other family things as well. No worries, please feel free to share your story as needed <3 we are here to listen and support

I am doing well, thank you for asking. Very busy but I come online when I can

Aimless.Wanderer
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#404
Old 04-05-2015, 08:29 PM

@ Vin - I'm so sorry. She was really young, but at least she isn't in any more pain now and she's in a better place. Even though she may not be there physically, at least she'll be there in your hearts :) It's okay! You need to vent to someone, and if you need to write a novel here, it's all good. That's what we're here for

I'm alright. I don't want spring break to end. I've gone campus visiting all break and I haven't had time to rest. I think I've driven more this week than I ever did during the school year, though. I know you've been saying that you're stressed, but how have you been?

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#405
Old 04-05-2015, 09:03 PM

I have been well, thank you for asking. I love the work and studying, but it can be a lot sometimes. Putting things into perspective, though, many people have it better, and many others have it worse.

hummy
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#406
Old 04-06-2015, 11:09 PM


great big giant tight hug

Vinny's Mule
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#407
Old 04-11-2015, 08:58 PM

Hey guys, just kinda an update on what's been going on on my end, I'm still not gonna be on too much for a while, but I'm just gonna quote what I said in one of my threads.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Vinny's Mule View Post
Hey guys -waves- it's been a crazy week.
So last Friday, the one before yesterday, Melissa passed away and the cemetery (same one that I've been fighting with to finish Grannys head stone) is screwing my brother over way bad. He bought burial insurance from them a little over a year ago and we've come to find out that it really isn't covering anything and it's just becoming way ugly. On top of that grandma Doris (Joeys grandma on his moms side) passed away Tuesday. She didn't want a funeral so Diana (my mother-in-law) is going to have her ashes buried with her brother and sister so grandma Doris can be with her kids again.
On a more positive note though, mom finally found out her brain tumor is benine! So yay for it being a little mass of nothing! And which ever doctor said it was the size of a grape was on crack! We got to see the scan yesterday and it's the size of two grains of rice! No where near that big! The pa we talked to yeaterday said mom should be just fine cause people can live with those kinda tumors there whole life without knowing it! They do want her to have another scan in two months though to make sure it's not growing or changing, the the pa said mom should be just fine!

So yay to all that. How be you guys?
I hope you all are doing good! And that you guys can get some rest when you can!

Aimless.Wanderer
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#408
Old 04-12-2015, 12:38 AM

@ Vin - Thanks for the update Vinny! I can't believe the cemetery people are taking advantage of you guys! That's just plain disgusting! >:( And I'm sorry for the loss, it must be a little tough having so many deaths all at once. At least your mother's tumor isn't as bad as the doctor had said! He must've been mistaken, it happens But at least her tumor isn't as bad as everyone thought, which is great! :) Stay strong!

salvete
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#409
Old 04-13-2015, 04:27 PM

Thank you for the update, Vinny XIII <3 I agree with Aimless.Wanderer regarding the cemetery situation. Glad to hear the good news about your mother though, I am really happy about that. *hugs*

hummy
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#410
Old 04-14-2015, 08:35 PM


thanks for the update with good news!
hope everything works out well

salvete
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#411
Old 04-18-2015, 03:19 PM

I agree whole-heartedly

Vinny XIII
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#412
Old 04-21-2015, 07:56 AM

Thanks for all the support you guys, I really appreciate it! Things are still pretty chaotic on my end, but I think the closer we get to the end of the month then the closer we get to things calming down. At least I hope so anyways. Melissa's memorial service will be on the second and I'm kinda thinking once everything's been all said and done there then things can really calm down. My brother had me draw her plaque thingy that's essentially her head stone. In one sense that's pretty cool, but at the same time... I dunno, I just have mixed feelings cause he's also going to have me draw his plaque/headstone too. In one sense I think that's pretty cool, but at the same time it makes me kinda sad...
Anyways, I finally got to have some time for myself so I went ahead and got a hair cut and redyed my hair. So in an odd way that kinda made me feel better.

How's everyone else been?
And hugs to all of you for being so awesome!

Aimless.Wanderer
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#413
Old 04-25-2015, 12:09 AM

@ Vin - I'm glad to hear you got a breather after everything calmed down a little! You really needed it, especially with all the posts that you've been updating us on

Things are busy on my end. I'm probably not going to be around that often because of school and end of the year exams and all those wonderful things *bleh* But in other news, I finally accepted admission into a college two hours away from my house! It's a really good college, and although they didn't give me a full scholarship, they were willing to give me some money for my tuition and stuff. It isn't anything like Cali, but I think I'll be pretty happy there :) I'm going to be going to orientation a couple weeks from now, and I'm already excited! :D

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#414
Old 04-25-2015, 04:15 PM

Oh yea, it was so needed! Now I'm chilling at a car show with the club Joey and I are a part of lol.

Oh nice! That's awesome Hun! I with ya luck with what's left of your senior year, and I hope ya like your new college!
That's awesome it's so close to your home too! Congrats Hun!

salvete
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#415
Old 04-25-2015, 07:05 PM

Aimless.Wanderer, I am so happy for you!! Congratulations on your college acceptance :)

Hugs to you as well Vinny XIII <3

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#416
Old 04-25-2015, 09:02 PM

Lol thanks Sal, how've you been?

salvete
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#417
Old 04-26-2015, 11:09 PM

I have been well, thank you for asking. Still pretty busy but hanging in there!

Vinny XIII
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#418
Old 04-27-2015, 06:13 AM

That's good hun. I'm glad you're hanging in there!

Moonlit Freedom
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#419
Old 04-27-2015, 06:52 AM

Oh, college! The start of a new adventure! :)

Vinny XIII
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#420
Old 04-30-2015, 04:38 AM

AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!! I'm sorry for ranting again you guys but I gotta get this outta my system or I'm gonna explode!
So Melissa's memorial is Saturday. I'm feeling super stressed cause I've only been able to get one of the twelve pages of her guest book thing drawn, I still have to redraw her plaque for the guest book and I have to wait on my mom to bring me the things I need for that (it's after 10pm and she never gave me a straight answer for if she was coming over or not), and now I have to get 18 cd's burned. All that I have to get done by the end of tomorrow cause Friday I'm gonna be running errands with mom all day and getting stuff set up at the church, on top of making two cakes for the dinner. Meanwhile my sister, my oldest sister is whining that she doesn't want to get the balloons filled with helium on Saturday cause she wants to get it done Friday. If they were the kind of balloons that'd keep helium well I'd say fine, more power to her. But no, these are the regular rubber balloons that start deflating after 24 hours. The service starts at 2pm on Saturday and she wants to fill them Friday at 10am. The whole point of the balloons is they're going to be released in the air after the service. Mom and Sonny (my brother) have tried explaining to her that they wont fly off if she gets them filled that soon but she doesn't want to do it Saturday morning. At first I thought that maybe it was cause she was going to make the lasagna that morning. Nope, she bought a frozen lasagna that she's going to put in the oven at the church before the service. Since that's the case I'm like why can't she take care of the balloons Saturday morning?! She says she's got too much to do.... what the hell does she have to do?! *sighs and flops back* I'm so over all of this! I'll be so glad when this weekends over!

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#421
Old 04-30-2015, 06:24 AM

Is there any way that you can ask for help with any of the CDs or any of it? So you can try to get the things drawn that need to get done? Seems like so much is falling on you to get done. :(

:/ That all sounds so frustrating!! :(

I'm dealing with stupid parent stuff... basically my parents found out that I am Bisexual and they're giving me crap about it as it goes against 'our' beliefs... Sorry I am who I am, and my husband and brother and his wife accept me for who I am. I'm so over my parents. They go not talking to me for almost a year and a half... and now they're in my face about something I've come to terms with - it's who I am... if this is how they're going to be... I am so ready to scream, and I can't have this stress, it's not good for me or my baby girl. I need to keep myself calm and not stressed for her.

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#422
Old 04-30-2015, 04:09 PM

Not really. Since I'm the only one "not working" (forget the fact I'm writing a book *rolls eyes*) I get put this kinda stuff a lot. Just different situations though. Mom works from 8-4, dad works from 7-5, I don't even try to ask Shawnda for help anymore cause then she starts on a pity party of "I work four jobs" and every time she pulls that I wanna remind her those other three job are just a couple house for a couple days in the week, I can't ask Jordon (my nephew that's 9 months younger than me) cause he's busy working to support his baby, wife, and his wife's family, and I can't ask his wife cause she's busy with their baby (he's 6 weeks old now!), and I don't want to ask Sonny for help cause he's dealing with enough right now between dealing with Melissa's family and Misty (my 16 year old niece) hard core rebelling. Sonny told me the cd's weren't important so if I don't get them done its okay, but they're for Melissa's family and judging by what little experience I've had with them, Sonny would never hear the end of it if they didn't have these cd's. These people... they frustrate me to no end because they are all about themselves and they have to have all the attention or they will find a way to make you pay attention to them. When Melissa passed away my family was telling everyone they were sorry she was gone but shes in a better place now, and all that kinda stuff. My family did that with everyone that was there. No one on Melissa's side tried to comfort Sonny or anyone else from my side of the family. Then when we all were leaving, one of Melissa's sisters had to pipe up and let my family know how horrible we were for not telling their parent "We're sorry you lost your child". We didn't say it exactly like that, but it was still said several times. And not only did she say that, she also told us how we all were excluding them all morning and we needed to include them. I was so pissed at that I had to go out of the room cause I was ready to rip her a new one. Especially after how they acted towards Sonny in Melissa's last days. So I can't imagine how they'd act if Sonny had the cd's for Melissa's service and they didn't. They already tell him he was horrible to Melissa and say all kinds of nasty things about him, I don't want him to have to deal with them throwing a fit over some cd's, so I'm burning them right now.
It's incredibly frustrating. I just keep telling myself it's not going to last forever and I can handle it if I just tackle one thing at a time.

I know exactly what you mean with that kinda stuff. I came out to my mom when I was 14 and told her I was bi, it didn't end well. First it was being really cold towards me for a month or so, then she went into total denial about it and still is denying it. I'm sorry your parents are being like that hun and I'm sorry they feel like they can get into your business like this after they go so long without contact. I don't blame ya for wanting to scream, I'd be ready to too if I were in the same spot. And no, that's not good for either one of you! I know this will be hard to do, but maybe if they keep acting like this it'd be best to tell them to either accept it and not potentially harm their new granddaughter with stressing you out, or don't accept it and just leave you alone since they went so long without talking with you guys to begin with. At the very least they need to back off till you have your baby. [hugs] I'm sorry hun. I hope things can get better for you!

Moonlit Freedom
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#423
Old 04-30-2015, 05:05 PM

That isn't fair on you that it always falls on you to get everything done. :/
That isn't fair that they treat him that way!! :( You all lost her, and it's hard on everyone but it's not fair to take that out on him... :( It'll all be over soon, you can do it!

I kind of wish my parents would deny it... at least then they'd be able to treat me like a person instead of someone who moved in with her husband - as we were MARRIED when he moved in... but the original plan (before we decided that we didn't want to wait and eloped) was for him to move in anyways, and now this. :/ Why can't they just accept that he's a good guy, I'm happy. I'm fine who who I am... end of story. Nothing else matters.
It's just how they are, and it's just driving me insane! :( Daniel has totally stood up to them for me as well, and told them that they need to stop treating me this way, he accepts me for who I am, I've been honest with him about my sexuality since we knew we were serious when we started dating, and he doesn't care as he loves me for me and that's all that matters. - which made me just start sobbing (doesn't take much for that to happen these days though). There are days when I wonder how I lucked out with him.
If they keep it up, I definitely plan on that, because I can't handle the stress right now. :( They can wait another 20 weeks right? One would think so... They've gone this long without being in contact, another 20 weeks is nothing. I hope so too. Although other than the parent drama, everything's going great! :P Just to get rid of that drama! Yay families!

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#424
Old 05-06-2015, 06:07 AM

I know it's not fair, but it happens. Like getting ready for the memorial on the day it was happening, I wound up getting stuck doing everything myself cause my brother had to deal with his in laws, mom had to go get ready and get dad, and Shawnda took off right after mom left. She blew up the balloons though, so that's something I didn't have to do.
That day was insane and long, but I survived it! Now that it's over things can finally start calming down!

I'm sorry you gotta go through all that hun, that really sucks! Is there anything I can do to help?
I don't blame ya for feeling that way hun. I'm glad you hubby is so supportive and it willing to stand up to your folks for ya! That's really great he does that. =3
No kidding! I hope things can calm down for you soon hun. That's great things have been great outside the family drama!
I know right? lol Family can be great sometimes, but majority of the time they just drive you nuts!

Aimless.Wanderer
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#425
Old 05-11-2015, 02:48 AM

@ sal - Thank you! And sorry for the late reply, I was busy and I couldn't make time to go on Mene. I still have to study for tests though, so if you see this and I'm offline, I'll be studying for exams! :3

 


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