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Inzanebraned
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#5601
Old 06-19-2018, 09:37 AM

Hope got to come and see my new place...and she got to put her feet into the pool!
That part of the day was so good!
Then Hope's mom brought me a piece of mail that had gone to her address...it was a bill from the heart doctor who did my triple by-pass...
After Medicaid paid their portion, I owe over $2,100!
That was an unexpected blow...it having been 8 months since the surgery...I had assumed Medicaid had covered the bill.
I have no real income to speak of...I'm not sure how I can pay...
Now I am wondering about the other cardiologist bill and the hospital bill.
Later in the day, the BF found a power cord to plug the tv in...and when he turned it on, the screen is scrambled...like somebody punched it or threw something at it!
It had been at the trailer we were at before I went to the hospital...and it had been working fine when we left.
An ex-coworker of the BF has been living at the trailer and was keeping our stuff until we could find another place...
I am so mad and disappointed! I was looking forward to letting Sarah watch some TV!
THEN, as I was putting Sarah to bed, I hit my knee cap on a part of the bar that keeps her from falling off the bed... HARD!
That was the last straw!
I broke down and just cried!
I miss Hope so much...but I have been in pretty good spirits about things...even though I am exhausted from moving and unpacking and lifting Sarah without help till the BF gets home from work at nearly 7pm.
That third strike of the day really tore me down!
But...Hope and her mom are planning to come over again tomorrow (Tuesday) and that should boost my spirits a lot...provided I can walk without pain!
Hope likes to go for walks and our apartment complex has a nice path through a tree-filled area on the way to the pool...and I know she will want to walk to the pool!
Well...as usual, my life is "One step forward, Two steps back" most of the time...
Why should now be any different?
On another bright note, though...Sarah seems very content in our new home...eating well and sleeping well at night.
At least there is that!

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#5602
Old 06-19-2018, 05:49 PM

Contact Medicaid it might just be a mistake and if it's not see if you can get a payment plan sorted.

Tellybox can be fixed, it wouldn't have been so bad if they'd told you and/or said look the T.V.'s had an accident I'll replace it or I'll give you some money towards getting it fixed/replaced.

HIM hopes you feel better soon, HIM thinks you should treat yourself to some chocolate as well. It's just being over tired and you know what they say bad things come in threes.

Silver Storm
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#5603
Old 06-19-2018, 08:45 PM

I am with HIM on this. Talk to Medicaid. If it is correct, there are agencies out there that will help with medical bills when you have no income. Also talk to the heart doctor, or his office, and explain the situation. They may be able to work something out.

Don't loose faith Inzane. Life can be hard and I have been in a similar situation where it feels like every time you start to put the pieces of your life back together they come tumbling back down. Take a deep breath and definitely spoil yourself in some way. Chocolate, a nice bubble bath, a manicure. Just some little treat. Taking care of you is JUST as important as taking care of Hope and Sarah. And always remember that you have us cheering you on and supporting you.

Inzanebraned
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#5604
Old 06-21-2018, 08:49 AM

It was so cold in our new apartment on the night of June 20th that we had to turn the heat on!
Our apartment faces the north and the bedroom windows only get the early morning sun, so the place stays on the chilly side all day.
This is a nice feature for the BF who spends most of his work days in a tow truck during the heat of the day...coming home to a nice cool environment is pleasant.
But on his day off he went back to bed around noon "because he was cold!"
This is a guy who complains about it being too hot when I'm wearing a sweatshirt over a t-shirt!
I have to remain observant of whether Sarah is cold or not...as she can't tell me she is cold. She might act cranky and I won't realize she is cold until I am putting her to bed and I pull her socks off to find her feet icy cold.
Our lease if a year long...and I see us looking for another place when our lease expires.
I take the heat much better than being cold. The cold makes me ache.
It's Summertime and we turned the heat on to get comfortable!
I can only imagine how cold the winter might be!
The good news is that the heaters work really well!...except for a squeaking/ticking sound that happens as the heater heats up and cools off... that's going to be something to get used to!

kelseydee
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#5605
Old 06-22-2018, 11:30 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Inzanebraned View Post
Friday was a hectic and busy day for me...
We found an apartment that aporoved us at the very last minute and we signed the lease on Friday...the last night that we are allowed to sleep at my daughter's house...
I had to leave in the afternoon to pick up the BF who was driving a U Haul truck to get stuff out of the storage unit that was in the mountains, about 40 minutes away...bring him down to sign the lease on the apartment, then drive back to the storage unit to pack the truck.
Then I followed him down from the mountains to the apartment and unloaded the truck.
We just stacked stuff where we could to try to hurry so we wouldn't disturb my daughter and Hope's dad when we brought Sarah back to sleep in Hope's room for the last time.
Hope went to spend the night at her other grandma's so she isn't here for my last night in her room...that makes me sad!
But, anyway, we didn't get done unloading the truck until 2:20 am, and by the time we dropped the truck off at U Haul and got to my daughter's house, it was about 3am...so I guess it was best that Hope wasn't at home to have me wake her up as I put Sarah to bed.
While BF was unloading the truck, I fed Sarah cold soup that I bought at the store because I had no idea where any pans were...the BF and I ate sandwiches.
Sarah ate well...she must have been hungry!
Before we got to the apartment, I discovered that Sarah had soaked her diaper and pants and the car seat...and I had no change of pants for her...but I had a fleece jacket...so I changed her diaper and put her legs into the arms of the jacket to keep her legs warm.
The stuff that has been in storage for nearly 2 years stinks! We found mouse poop on the floor when we moved stuff into the apartment, but couldn't tell which furniture or item it came from.
We also have a couch that was being used by the guy that is renting the trailer we used to live in...and it smells like the stinky trailer and the guy's dog!
I don't have a vacuum anymore but that couch needs to be vacuumed badly and soaked in Fabreeze!
Sorry this post is so long...I just needed to wind down from my day, and with Hope not sleeping next to me I will have a hard time falling asleep.
I'm sure that some folks might not might reading about my busy, hectic, difficult day...I hope I didn't bore anybody!
Tomorrow (Saturday) the BF works all day so my daughter will give Sarah and me...and Sarah's wheelchair...and what's left of my personal affects at her house...a ride to the apartment...She said she would try to help me set up Sarah's bed and put some stuff away.
And if she picks Hope up early enough, she will stop back by so Hope can see my new place...
It that doesn't work out, she promised Hope she would bring her over on Monday.
(Even I don't want to mess up any Fathers Day plans they may have...so if not Saturday, then Monday.)
Okay...this post has gotten terribly long and I fear I may be rambling.
I hope everybody is having a good weekend!
Thank u Jesus that things r turning your way. Whew!!!!!

---------- Post added 06-22-2018 at 07:32 PM ----------

Quote:
Originally Posted by Inzanebraned View Post
It was so cold in our new apartment on the night of June 20th that we had to turn the heat on!
Our apartment faces the north and the bedroom windows only get the early morning sun, so the place stays on the chilly side all day.
This is a nice feature for the BF who spends most of his work days in a tow truck during the heat of the day...coming home to a nice cool environment is pleasant.
But on his day off he went back to bed around noon "because he was cold!"
This is a guy who complains about it being too hot when I'm wearing a sweatshirt over a t-shirt!
I have to remain observant of whether Sarah is cold or not...as she can't tell me she is cold. She might act cranky and I won't realize she is cold until I am putting her to bed and I pull her socks off to find her feet icy cold.
Our lease if a year long...and I see us looking for another place when our lease expires.
I take the heat much better than being cold. The cold makes me ache.
It's Summertime and we turned the heat on to get comfortable!
I can only imagine how cold the winter might be!
The good news is that the heaters work really well!...except for a squeaking/ticking sound that happens as the heater heats up and cools off... that's going to be something to get used to!
Still, yays

TaiyoTsuki
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#5606
Old 06-23-2018, 08:27 AM

Yaaaaayy on the new place, Inzane!

X'D you're the opposite of me. I handle cold better than heat...which is not great, considering the area I live in gets miserably hot in the summer. I melt so easily when it gets hot .

Ava The Vampire
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#5607
Old 06-25-2018, 01:52 AM

I'm excited that you're in an apartment now, Inzane. :)
I actually watched a video recently that reminded me of you and Sarah!


Or alternatively: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRzzDRZcUEA (if the youtube embed still doesn't work.

TaiyoTsuki
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#5608
Old 06-25-2018, 03:27 AM

Hhhnnngggh....I swear, my skin's gotten more acne-prone over the years rather than less. Summer and sweating doesn't help....

Inzanebraned
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#5609
Old 06-25-2018, 08:01 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ava The Vampire View Post
I'm excited that you're in an apartment now, Inzane. :)
I actually watched a video recently that reminded me of you and Sarah!


Or alternatively: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRzzDRZcUEA (if the youtube embed still doesn't work.
That's a really cool video, Ava! Thanks for sharing it!
Sarah doesn't communicate even that well...she mostly just makes whining/moaning sounds and I have to guess what she wants...asking her questions and seeing if she shakes or nods her head...and a lot of the time she says yes when she means no!
Sarah was fortunate to go to schools that had special classrooms and teachers specially for the disabled students. Those kids got to do things with the other kids in school, too.
There were also programs where regular kids could opt to be helpers in the special education classrooms as an elective and they got credits for it.
It was cool to hear about the football captain sitting on the floor, singing songs with the special kids!
Sarah was very popular...there was one time we were at Six Flags Amusement Park and these girls walked up and said "Hi, Sarah! How are you?"...they had gone to the same school as Sarah.

Sarah has gotten over the newness of our new apartment and has started whining/moaning a lot!...I think she is bored without Hope around to watch.
She also thinks that as soon as the BF comes home that he should put her into the car so she can go for a ride...she keeps saying "caaaw" and making her sign for "car."
Maybe the thinks we should be going back to Hope's house?
We remembered that we still had a working box tv that was stored in our broken down van...it hooks up to an old vcr we have and we have been able to watch vcr movies.
Even that didn't seem to make her stop being noisy!
I wish she could just tell me what her problem is!
I figure by the time a month goes by she will be more comfortable and realize that this is our new home...I hope!

So...how has Ava been?
Have you been doing anything exciting and fun?

Ava The Vampire
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#5610
Old 06-26-2018, 01:40 AM

Aww. I see.
I'm sure once Sarah gets used to the new apartment, she'll like it a lot more. :)

Things have been going okay for me..
I've been really busy! I'm recording a new song I wrote, I recently had back to back days of acting workshops and meeting with acting agents!
It's been CRAZY!

I recently did a workshop yesterday and I was feeling pretty good about it, I waas confident in my acting abilities, but the scenes I was rehearsing required some sexual touching and even though we didn't go *that* far, my partner still touched me and I felt so scared. I was reminded of the time when I was in the ambulance and the tech was touching me... I ended up freaking out so much that the director noticed this and said, "Ava, you need to connect more with your acting partner." So I tried, but he kept saying that my eyes were all over the place and that I was "cheating" my partner out of a good scene. :(

I felt bad... But today, I met with an agent who does commercials. I'd rather start with commercials because they pay you better, and there's not as high of a chance at there being any sexual touching or kissing in commercial shoots like there are in TV and film

Inzanebraned
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#5611
Old 06-26-2018, 04:00 AM

I think commercials would be a great start for you. Didn't you do a Best Buy commercial?
Maybe more serious roles will become easier for you a little later...or you can find roles that don't require your character to have a romance.
I wish you the best of luck in your endeavors!
What is the song you wrote about?

Ava The Vampire
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#5612
Old 06-27-2018, 08:59 PM

Thanks, Inzane :)
I was in a Best Buy commercial back in Minnesota. :)
I just recently auditioned for another Best Buy commercial too!

The song I wrote was mostly about being myself and encouraging others to be themselves too. I wrote it a couple of years ago when I was feeling sad because I'm not completely heterosexual and when I asked my parents if I married a woman would they come to my wedding and they said "no".

The song is kind of encouraging other people to be themselves and it's a mantra for me that even though I won't turn out the way my parents want me to, I still love them and hope that they would accept me as I am too.

kelseydee
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#5613
Old 06-27-2018, 10:06 PM

Ava. Its a hard thing to live with.
Being different. Outside the box.
But it can b dealt with.

hummy
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#5614
Old 06-27-2018, 11:07 PM


Honestly people never know what they're going to do until they are faced with doing it. Just be yourself and love who you love and your parents will come around and if they don't... people love you for who you are.

Ava The Vampire
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#5615
Old 06-28-2018, 02:19 AM

Yeah, that makes sense, hummy...
My parents are very homophobic. They have gay friends, but they don't want their gay friends to "act gay" around them. Like, wtf?!

So, they don't like two men or two women kissing or holding hands in public. They feel like that's "forcing others to accept their lifestyle".

It's really stupid.

I wish I didn't have to feel bad about who I am attracted to... I wish I could change my parents' minds about gay people and transgender people. But they are too stubborn to listen.

hummy
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#5616
Old 06-28-2018, 07:08 AM


They can always just look away or turn around and walk the other way.

Inzanebraned
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#5617
Old 06-28-2018, 08:41 AM

In my opinion, most gay folks don't "act gay" around other people...any more than straight fk! Straight girls hug each other and straight guys put their arm around their friend...
I usually can't tell gay folk from straight folk until they tell me.
Maybe I just don't pay enough attention or care if somebody is gay or not.
In my world, people are just people!

Ava The Vampire
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#5618
Old 06-28-2018, 11:00 PM

I think my parents feel like whenever a gay person does something gay in public, it's an attempt to "force them to accept their lifestyle" which, is not, and has never been true.

I could get upset and say that when I see a straight couple kissing in public that they are trying to shove THEIR beliefs down my throat... but no one says that because it's "more natural". Whatever the hell that means.

It's awfully quiet all over the internet today...
People must be busy, I guess...

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#5619
Old 06-29-2018, 01:23 PM

Some PDAs are just nasty. If you're hungry go get some food instead of trying to suck out your partners inards via their mouth !

That's probably just because HIM is bitter.

Ava The Vampire
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#5620
Old 06-29-2018, 06:18 PM

YES! I agree, HIM.
I don't even like watching people touch tongues in movies. >3<
But I would just look the other way if that happened in person.

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#5621
Old 06-29-2018, 06:40 PM

Some people just do it to get a reaction.

Inzanebraned
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#5622
Old 06-30-2018, 02:41 AM

Public displays of affection usually don't bother me...
I appreciate people showing love for each other...unlike most of the general population who are rude and disrespectful and hateful most of the time.
Even in our apartment complex, most of the people won't even look at me, much less smile or say hello. Definitely not friendly folks!

R u b y
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#5623
Old 06-30-2018, 05:50 PM

Ava!!!!! Sorry I haven't been around all that much, I just wanted to say that I'm happy you're back and that I missed you and I hope you're okay :3

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#5624
Old 06-30-2018, 05:53 PM

We are not a happy HIM

R u b y
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#5625
Old 06-30-2018, 05:53 PM

What's wrong HIM? D:

 



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