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Chi
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Old 12-17-2013, 06:12 PM

Nope, not an actual mental problem. Just senescence. She's 80.

SQF is "Safe Quality Food". It's a certification that a lot of business chains are moving towards obtaining. It is full of strict code that needs adherence to, and my grandmother argues that we don't need to follow it. My work days right now basically consist of her telling me to do something, so I do it, then she says it's wrong. She tells me how to then do it, so I do it, then she tells me that's wrong and my original way of doing it was right.

Point being? She doesn't know what she's doing, nor does anyone else, and I'm being essentially asked to create SOPs and training manuals from scratch--alone, without support. It's a paycheck though. *shrugs* I could go into fast food or something temporarily, but the pay wouldn't be comparable. Right now the money is what we need after all the car repairs and mess this year.

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Old 12-17-2013, 06:15 PM

I do hope things get better for you.
Oh no, Cole needs surgery?
[Re-read your previous post]
[Cole is your hubby? I don't know.]

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Old 12-17-2013, 06:54 PM

They will get better. It's just time. I've made the decision that I'm going to "resign" after our tax return is received (to know I can financially afford to leave), AND after I receive confirmation from the state board that I'm approved to take my exam. I have a job lined up after I pass the exam, so... yeah.

Yep, gallbladder surgery. He's checking out options later today, but he doesn't see the surgeon (consult--not surgery) until the second week of January or so. I'm thinking he'll have it in February, so we have time to save up some money. (:

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Old 12-17-2013, 07:13 PM

I had to have my gallbladder taken out after I had Leo.
I ended up developing gallstones while pregnant.
Worst. Pain. Ever.
Worse than childbirth!
Serious!
The drugs wore off around the five hour mark of labour, so I felt everything, plus the pushing, plus the cut and tear. Gallbladder pain was still worse.

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Old 12-17-2013, 08:24 PM

I had undiagnosed gallbladder attacks for almost 3 years before they finally took the stupid thing out. I'm not sure which is worse though. I didn't have medication of any sort, and had no break between contractions. They are both misery in different ways! XDD

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Old 12-17-2013, 09:41 PM

Ha we were talking about about childbirth last night. My sister and I cause she is offended she was not my first choice for having over as secondary support when I go into labor (my backup in case I have to go to the hospital anyhow and someone to watch the kids if it happens in the daytime.) Honestly if we didn't butt heads so bad I don't think having her do it would be any kind of problem she would likewise be a better choice where the kids are concerned too. But she and I butt heads terribly! And I know she would at least mentally wig out about me being in labor downstairs while she is upstairs. She was wigging that I want the kids near. Acting like it was going to somehow scar them for life! Honestly Ellie won't understand one way or another Sean will probably be unloaded by the idea he knows where babies come from just never SAW it. Michael just requested not to have to see baby being born which is a ok with me I don't want the kids near during labor or delivery but I want th to see their fresh born brother! Not be waiting hours for it like with Ellie.

Then I tried to explain contractions to Dillon. That was fun... I don't view contractions as painful. But they are agonizing! I basically said it is like holding your breath until you feel like you're gonna burst then getting a quick breath and going back under.

I've never had gall problems but my sister did she said it was awful.

---------- Post added 12-17-2013 at 03:01 PM ----------

I went out today in hopes of finding Dillon some pants I went through every pair of size 36 waist jeans at Ross and Goodwill and the longest I could find were 32s (Dillon wears a 36x34) the had lots of 36x30 but nothing for a tall guy.... :/ so I will have to resort to Kmart or Wal-Mart now. :( I can never find my size in men's either it's so weird.

I got a call today from an anonymous benefactor who had signed us up for an angel program for the kids for Christmas I was really surprised. They asked if I could spare the time to pick up the gifts I was warned they would not be wrapped but I didn't expect anything major so I went pick them up with Ellie and they handed me a bike for her as well as a large bag full of toys o.o I was flabbergasted and holy cow Ellie was excited about the bike! It seemed like whoever did the purchasing/ donating was just as baffled by Michael as we are though lol.

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Old 12-18-2013, 12:15 AM

Whoa! That's awesome! o.o Happy Christmas, hey? Yay!

If you think having your sister there would create a bad memory, it's best not to do it. As far as the kids? Whatever is comfortable. Like with what Michael said, I wouldn't push it on Terra, but if she were curious I'd just lay out what I may or may not be doing in labor, trying to normalize it so she wouldn't panic.

That, and let's not forget a vagina looks nothing like a vagina when delivering. It looks like a frightening gaping monster from the deep. ;_;

My friend had a home birth with her second child, and she showed me all sorts of photos. Her little girl was actually in the birthing tub with her for some of it. It was sweet! :)

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Old 12-18-2013, 12:58 AM

See I could see both Ellie and Sean getting in the birthing tub if allowed. But I don't see myself allowing it. I like quiet and dark and I am going to make an assumption I will like the warm water because well it is how I deal with most other discomforts and pains. A nice hot shower. I like soaking too but I don't like bathing in a bathtub I'm weird like that.

I guess my sister is traumatized because her upstairs neighbor had a home birth a week or two ago she heard a lot of yelling and er disturbing noises that made her go to the woman's door to be sure everything was ok. She mentioned a gaggle of women answered the door and vaguely explained she was having a home birth. :P she said it lasted hours (first baby but really not a long birth only about 6 hours) and that the noises disturbed her. So she was concerned about the kids being disturbed. Let me make one thing clear I am a near silent birther. I go into a trance almost at around 5 or 6 cm and I don't like what little Zen I find to be interrupted. I breathe deeply to manage pain I don't moan really but this is with minor medication towards about 8cm. With Ellie the meds didn't do anything and her contractions were rough. Then the Dr came and gave me a local :/ or 12 and I could no longer feel contractions even at the end :/ but I don't imagine it will be much different the local was applied as she was beginning to emerge not for contractions. I just don't see the last hour (less probably in reality) being different from what I am going to imagine to be 1 hour prior. So I am not terribly concerned.

I am iffy about my sister, I think she'd make the experience more comfortable for the kids.... But there is a chance I may strangle her too if she starts traipsing about or taking the kids in and out of the door or something. I am unsure about Tara (SIL) too. She is awesome and would be supportive about me being at home and birthing but she isn't my top choice when it comes to my kids either. It is hard to say. Maybe they can both come and Tara can bash my sister in the head if she does something stupid because she doesn't understand the prospect of having babies and Breanna (sister) can keep the kids entertained as they are enthralled with her! Lol...

And yes a very happy Christmas! It was a very sweet surprise! I think I just need to find two presents for Michael to balance things out! And I do believe I found at least 1 today I just wanted to talk to Dillon about it. I also found pants for Dillon at Wal-Mart. I didn't my find dress slacks sadly but maybe for his birthday in March.

---------- Post added 12-17-2013 at 07:52 PM ----------

So I am debating on whether I should ruin the good mood of the thread with other news my sister shared with me last night. :/ or if I should just keep it to myself.

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Old 12-18-2013, 12:26 PM

I can see why your sister would be disturbed hearing the sounds but having no idea what was going on. It'll be different for the kids because they'll know from the beginning, especially if you sit down with everyone before the birth even begins to explain what may or may not happen. I imagine you'll stick to being a silent birther, but it might be good to tell them you might moan or yell, that way they don't panic IF you do.

If nothing else, a home birth benefits from a solid plan that supports YOU. If you can pick someone (Dillon?) that can lay the law down if stuff gets out of hand, then you can focus on bringing the baby into the world without worrying about anything else. This is about YOU, and no one else. There's gotta be someone... *thinks*

What news? :O

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Old 12-18-2013, 01:56 PM

My sister shared the news the other night that my brother was arrested again :( this is the 3rd time this year. We have all tried to help him. I wish he would just help himself :( he has to see how bad his life is going. :/ it makes me so upset.

Dillon can hardly lay down the law with kids honestly lol. It will definitely have to be a decision I manage soon but in the end I will have to lay down the laws. I have jointly explained to the kids that I will be having Liam at home not in a hospital and that their May be noises and such that might seem scary but that it is totally normal. But I haven't said anything about the birth in a long time so I probably should reiterate. Ellie is a big worry as she doesn't understand at all. But in the end I don't think at of it will have long term problems.

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Old 12-18-2013, 03:34 PM

Is this the brother that lived with you guys for a while, or the other one? :( How gutting!! I hope he finds his way in time. If you don't mind me asking, is addiction part of it? Violence? Does he ever have stretches of time where things are good, then he gets on shaky ground again?

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Old 12-18-2013, 04:16 PM

It's addiction. He and the people he associates with Will do anything to get that "high" or in my brother's case low. We (sister and I) were discussing it and what he was arrested for isn't his MO. He was caught in high dollar shoes and jacket that was stolen earlier in the day. The man stolen from reported it. My brother will steal, he's stolen medication, money, items of value that can be either scrapped or pawned. He has gone as far as to break into houses to steal stuff he can scrap. Including our childhood home my mom lost in the bankruptcy. :( I think that was the most hurtful news I had gotten from my sister the other night. He broke in and stole all the brass chandeliers and all the brass piping and sold it for scrap :'(

He has small stretches usually only under force (like when he was living with any of the family in the beginning) he seems to clean up, wants to exercise (he's very body conscious), and tries to find solid work. Then he plummets from there. He starts hanging out with friends who are just NO good and he deteriorates. I do wonder if some of it is depression based. He seems to have a hard time being happy. He also lost his job because he was stealing money from them :/ I find it so weird that even raised by the same people/ person how different all of my siblings and I are..

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Old 12-18-2013, 04:35 PM

They say that one of the biggest indicators of falling back into "the pattern" is going back home. People have better success when they move away from their hometown/living arrangements. Going back to the "norm" (friends especially) makes it much more difficult... too much temptation and bad memories I guess.

You say you struggle with depression, hey? Maybe you guys do have it.. It's hard to say. :( I'm glad you're not struggling with addiction. I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Cole just left for the ER. Been quite a night here. I'm not sure he can wait until February for surgery. I'd rather it just happen, you know? :/ Mom's on backup plan in case he needs emergency surgery, but I don't think they'll give it to him.

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Old 12-18-2013, 06:55 PM

He has burned all his family bridges as far as that goes unless my youngest brother didn't learn by observing. But I don't foresee him moving out of my mom's for a really long time. He's still in high school and doesn't have a whole lot aspiration but I think he'll go to college just to avoid getting kicked out. I think most of my family suffer depression either minor or major. Including myself. But not trying to help yourself isn't the answer in any case...

I hope they rush his surgery into happening sooner rather then later. :( he shouldn't have to suffer because of bureaucratic bull :/ doctors annoy the tar out of me, it is all on their say so. It's frustrating.

In better news I finally finished Christmas shopping!

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Old 12-18-2013, 07:16 PM

Exactly--inaction isn't acceptable. Life truly is what we make it, and sometimes we have to find ourselves in the midst of piles of obstacles.

He's still there. They're going to get him an ultrasound soon and have him speak to the person who would be doing the surgery. He's got fluids going and more pain/nausea meds. Something's up with it though... going 1am until now and STILL being in pain isn't normal for a gallbladder attack. Not with two rounds of Tramadol. O_o;

Cross fingers for us. If a stone is stuck, he may not be able to get laparoscopic(sp) surgery, and open surgery takes weeks to recover from. x_x;;

---------- Post added 12-18-2013 at 02:42 PM ----------

His ultrasound looks roughly the same but is inflamed this time around. I think he'll likely get antibiotics and be sent home. x_x

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Old 12-18-2013, 08:24 PM

It sounds exactly like what they did to my sister. She has still yet to have surgery for hers even though they told her it was inevitable. :/

I don't think I can deny that Ellie caught what Jayden had brought here on Monday. Looks like we will all be sick come Christmas knowing how my family and germs go. The baby is the worst person to become sick first. :/ the boys will be next (Sean sounds like he may have already started the process. Then Dillon and I... We will likely be the ones sick ON Christmas... Ellie has been really dulled down today. Her whole personality seems to be being dampened by this one. :( she is napping now, she fell asleep on the way home from errands too, woke up long enough to pick at her lunch and then went down again... poor baby. She has a light fever and a horrible stuffy nose and cough :'( being sick ON Christmas break stinks!

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Old 12-18-2013, 08:28 PM

Oh, poor Ellie. :( It's awful to be sick near the holidays. The boys must begin break after Friday?

Grr, that's so annoying. :/ Sorry to hear it!

I only just noticed the calendar. Is this your last week with Jayden or do you have her some of next week and then THAT'S the final? o.o

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Old 12-18-2013, 09:27 PM

I SHOULD be done with Jayden on Friday. The communication is pathetic between us. I will be 30 weeks on Christmas Eve so that would only give Monday as an option to work which I suppose they could argue I have to do but I really really am hoping I am done. Friday is going to be hard enough having Jayden all day, needing to pick up Sean at 11 from school and Michael at 1:15 from the bus. I swear sometimes the school district is out to make it impossible for both parents to work. :/ if I were not staying at home I have no clue how we could manage the 3 to 5 varying schedules and the boys school isn't even that bad they generally have the same schedule but every once in a while they are all over the place.

Ellie is miserable after nap. She sounds miserable and doesn't want to leave my lap. I can't say I am much better. I set out to try to paint some while Ellie was napping after prepping dinner and walked by the bedroom only to see little eyes looking at me. I figured she'd be ok to play in the room while I pained since I am working on the ceiling. But I worked 15 minutes and now I am fully drained. *yawns* I barely got anything done and had to sit down. I have 45 minutes until I get the boys so I am going to try to work some more... easier said then done. I have a severe case of the third trimesters

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Old 12-18-2013, 09:33 PM

xDDD That should be put into a book where all women nod and say, "Ah yes... say no more. The 'Third Trimesters'." I am glad you're almost done watching her. Were there opportunities to tell her you don't plan to watch her again, or have they not come up?

Cole should be getting home soon, whenever the ER "releases" him. The doctor who will be his surgeon said it doesn't look like a today or tomorrow need, but he does need it out ASAP, so they're looking to do it within the next week or two. He and I will make a plan on how to deal with the financial cut, as he doesn't have access to vacation time yet and his sick time is tapped. I had hoped to take a week off in January, but I guess not. >>;; I'll wait and see how bad his recovery time is. I do know his supervisor is awesome and would give him things to do from home.

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Old 12-18-2013, 09:59 PM

That didn't last even 15 minutes *sigh* as soon as I got onto the ladder Ellie started sobbing for no explained reason. She wouldn't say why either. But her fever has spiked and I can tell in her demeanor she feels awful :'( So down I am my body is rebelling against work too. :/ Guess there will just be a lot of sick baby cuddling and tinkerbell/ curious George watching tonight instead of cleaning and Christmas prepping. I am glad I prepped dinner when I did because all I have to do is pop it in the oven now.

It's good that they seem to be pushing it forward! I hope that you can manage it all financially without too much rearranging!

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Old 12-18-2013, 10:04 PM

Ohhhh, poor baby. :( Give her lots of cuddles and push fluids the best you can. I hate when kids are sick... so scary.

Thanks! I hope so too. Naturally, I'll keep you posted. 8) *thumbs up*

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Old 12-18-2013, 10:56 PM

Oh there is lots of cuddling happening now that the boys are home :) you know something is amiss when she doesn't want to move! She is laying quite contentedly with me under a blanket. She is in distant that she is full-featured her radiating heat :(

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Old 12-18-2013, 11:03 PM

Awww... I hope she feels better soon. :(

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Old 12-19-2013, 01:32 AM

I finally caved and gave her tylonal (I was trying to postpone because fever has a purpose in my eyes as long as it is monitored I don't do bedtime fevers I will typical and ibuprofen the heck out of those) she seems to be feeling a little better with that. Enough to eat dinner and a candycane anyhow.

We made kid ornaments for family tonight! Little finger print snowman family on clear glass bulbs! I still need to do a little to them. Buttons noses etc. And then tonight after the kids go to bed hopefully I can finish them with dots of puff paint that can dry over night! I am also hoping to finish the nativity ornaments I've been working on! I finished making all the Josephs last night before dillon's lethargy made me angry and drove me to bed. He was literally falling asleep cutting out pieces to the felt board! I get so irritated when he falls asleep like that he has fallen asleep with me talking to him :/ biggest pet peeve ever ;P

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Old 12-19-2013, 01:08 PM

I do the same with fevers. I monitor closely, and I don't mess with bedtime!

Aww... the ornament idea sounds so cute!

Yesterday Cole went to bed before 7, and Terra refused to sleep. She also ended up with diarrhea. I thought she was okay this morning, but nope. Bent over to get a juice box, and that was that. :/ She's been going steady every 3 minutes. She has no other signs of anything bad, so I think it was the gluten-laden "treat" we tried to get away with. I hate the dietary issues. Hate them. THIS is why we're a gluten-free household.

I put a diaper on her for the first time in over half a year, and she's filled one. She caught it the next time and made it to the potty. I feel so bad for her. I'm pushing the fluids the best I can. She's eating toast at the moment, and I'll likely make a banana bread or something starchy with less sugar so that she can hopefully get better. I asked Cole to go get some meds, too, as I can't take her. She can't last that long. o.o;;;

 


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