Kay, this is to help my sanity so I don't fucking destroy everything of his in the house.

1. Was in a relationship for 4 years, we have a daughter together that is 2.5 years old.

2. Broke up because he has anger issues and was abusive.

3. I left, went to stay with my girlfriend. [He knew about her and was 110% okay with me having a girlfriend.] I got drunk and she pressured her husband on me for a threesome. I have a self-destructive sort of personality when I get depressed, and went with it.

4. I came back to live with him because this is the best situation for me. [Turned out my girlfriend is a crazy fucking liar.] I was coming back to live with my ex JUST as a room mate. I'm a REALLY honest person, so I told him what occurred. He seemed okay with it, and was treating me better than he had treated me in MONTHS before we broke up. I started considering getting back together with him... and we went on what I thought was a date.

5. It's been a little over a month since we broke up. The day after what I thought was our "date" he goes to have a long phone call outside. I asked him who it was, and it was a girl that is interested in dating him. He passed up sex with me to talk to this girl. I'm jolted into realizing where we actually are instead of where I thought we were.

6. Fighting ensues and he tells me that he wasn't really interested yet, he just was talking to her. But he knows she's interested in him. He tells me that we can't have a relationship until he fixes his anger issues. I'm upset and accept it... and I've been bitchy for days.

7. He's still talking to the bitch who he KNOWS wants him in a relationship. He's probably moving towards a relationship with her. EVEN THOUGH HIS EXCUSE FOR NOT DATING ME IS THAT HE NEEDS TO FIX HIMSELF. Yet he still loves me and blahblah.


I know I'm pretty much ruining any chance I have of getting back together with him by constantly fighting right now and getting mad and stuff. But he's feeding me bullshit and it pisses me off.

Should I let it go? HOW do I let it go? I really just want to break everything he owns right now. [He's at work.]I HATE being lied to.

Thanks for any advice offered. ^^;

;~; Alicia, I wish I had advice for you.. but you know I'm just good at spamming and laughing. x___x; I love you to bits though. Please try and stay okay.. if he was abusive before... ;O; Lol, I'm about to cry IRL.

leave h im he dosent care for you if he is letting someone else in to his life when he says he loves you.

I think you need to stay out of a relationship with him. But your best bet is to get counciling.

;~; You guys say leave him like it's so easy. She's got a kid with him and is living with him. People can't just pick up and walk into another house and be all.. "LOLILIVEHERENAO."

Alicia,
I am truly sorry to hear about your situation.
If you don't mind, I would like to tell you a few experiences I had.

1.
One of my exs that I dated for four years, cheated on me and left me.
I was deeply in love with him and I strongly believe he did too.
At least that's what he told me all the time.
He also had an anger issue, and slowly became an alcoholic as well.
When he finally told me that he's been cheating,
his excuse was that he was so in love with me that he wanted to marry me.
But the fact that I was his first girlfriend wasn't fair for him so he decided to date some other girl.
He asked me to wait a few months until he gets to know the girl he's cheating with
and coming back to me.
I thought that was a serious BS so I left him.
I had a hard time letting him go since I loved him so much,
but time passed and I did.

2.
My other ex whom I dated for about 4 months,
he was full of lies and told me that he wanted to take a break,
and it turned out he left me for another girl.
After not being able to get the girl he left me for,
he started to give me crap and told me that
he doesn't want me but also doesn't want other people to have me either.


My conclusion is...
You have to let go. I am now with in a relationship where I am truly happy.
I know your situation is hard, but you are ruining your chance of being happier.
I promise you, you'll be happier after letting him go.

Thank you for that Garret.

Thank you Iheart and Chris, also.

So do I just suck it up and let go and try to heal? I mean I have to still live with him. :/

Don't stay in a relationship with him, for your daughter's sake.

My mother stayed in a broken marriage with a man she did not love who was cruel to her and would lash out in anger and drink too much. I grew up very unhappy. Me and my two siblings have numerous problems because of our father.

Just be careful to be kind to your little girl and treat her right. My mother will lash out at me when she is upset with my father, and it hurts. I would much rather have grown up poorer wwithout a father than with one that is so verbally abusive.

You are very welcome.

Hmm.. are there anyway you can move away from him?
I understand the situation may be very difficult since you have a daughter,
but it's also not healthy to have your daughter see you and your ex living together
when you guys are not together either.
And for the most part, it will make it more difficult for your to let go and heal.

I tried living with a friend~ Didn't work.

I tried living with my parents~ but that's more horrible than HELL... I can explain further if you need me to.

I can't support myself. :/

@ Alicia:
I guess your situation may be worse than I think.
Well, it's unhealthy for you to live with your ex for sure.
I don't know what to say.
Try to avoid being around him as much as possible.
It's harder to let go if you see him too much.

I went through a similar experience. Not exactly, but very similar. All I can offer is that you need to let him know that you're still interested (if in fact you are). Tell him that you're not cool with him seeing other people right now. *shrug* Never hurts to be honest.

I think you need to let go so you can move on and heal.
It's an easier thing said than done (I know I've definitely been there) but it is possible.

Living with him is definitely not a good environment to do so. In fact, it may make it nearly impossible.

You've said you don't have anywhere to go right now, so at the moment you'll just have to live with it (hard, but it seems you have no other option) and try your best to move forward. The first opportunity you can see to move out, jump on it.

Leave, if not for your own sake then for your daughter. It isn't good for her to live in that environment and if she sees daddy treating mommy that way, she will believe that is how it is supposed to be and get into her own abusive relationship. You need to get away from him so that you can realize that he isn't what you need/want. There are better men out there who would treat you 100% better, believe it or not.

Wow. *cry* I honestly hope that everything works out for you, I'm sure it will but I guess here is what little advise I can offer to you...

So...this is the guy that you have a child with, and you were with him for like 4 years! That's a pretty long time, and even if you two end up not working out he will most likely always be in your life because it is his child too. And then you broke up because of anger issues, which may be the best for both of you, because you don't want to raise a child in a scary enviornment. She should be protected and love, not yelled at or anything, (not that you ex really does that...I'm just saying)

I'm a little bit confused about that whole girlfriend part...and I got the impression that she was married...and you had a 3 sum, I got that, but was she your girlfriend and ALSO had a husband, or was she just a girl that was your friend...I'm retarded...

Reading through the rest of your post, made me so sad...it's only been a month you said since you two broke up and he's already kind of looking at different girls, I would think that after a relationship for 4 years AND a child that he would be a little bit more heart broken...I'm suprised that he's not. But you said that he does need to work out his anger issues, and I think that's true because you want the best and you want the best for your daughter as well...maybe if he gets some help and starts to realize what he has with you and everything is a family and he should care about you all, not want to rip you appart because of his anger...or something.

So I guess I would try and give him a little bit of space to work things out, and in another few weeks sit down with him and have a serious conversation about 'us' and ask him if you think getting back together would be good for you or not...and then go from there...

I hope that helped, I think I probably just kept going blah, blah, blah...so I'm sorry if this doesn't help you. :(

But i hope that everything works out. <3

I would forget him.
He apparently doesn't care much for you since he's been talking to this one girl the whole time, if he did then he would stop and actually seek help for his anger problems.

He's abusive.
He has anger problems.
Why would you want to go back to someone who could snap any second? Even if he had treatment.
It doesn't sound like a good relationship let alone an environment. =/

You need to get yourself out of there along with your daughter.
He isn't suitable for being a boyfriend/husband, it just isn't right putting your daughter through the exact same shit your going through. D:

Just remember.
No man should ever hit the woman he loves.
If he does, he doesn't love her.

I think you should just move out, get your own place and leave him. Maybe find a different roommate. I'm sure there are people looking for some. You can probably find a site that has people looking for roommates. So..Yeah.. *blinks* Hope that helps but I don't really know what else to say.