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moon waltz
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#51
Old 12-23-2007, 07:22 PM

Marriage would certainly have its legal, financial, social, etc. benefits. However, my primary understanding of what one gets out of marriage is just that, and therefore it does not offer anything I that I would want. I have no interest in ever producing or adopting a child (says the sage of 21 :wink: , but I don't have any expectation that I will ever change my mind), thus negating the significance of any legally or socially recognized family. Indeed, I have never loved anyone romantically. I would, I think, like to live with a 'significant other,' but marriage would not add anything to a committed relationship with such a person.

Letisha
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#52
Old 12-23-2007, 07:31 PM

I think marriage is too serious for me at the moment. I may change my outlook, but definitely not now. Not soon, that is. But maybe when I'm more mature.

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#53
Old 12-24-2007, 01:21 AM

love is a very funny thing

vmars
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#54
Old 12-24-2007, 01:45 AM

I think marriage would be a really great thing, but it would have to be with the right person. Without that right person it would most likely go down hill quick. Like I said I would like to get married, but if it does not happen, I am not going to marry just anybody so that I can be married.

ChildofGod
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#55
Old 12-24-2007, 01:53 AM

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ancasta
So, in the past year it seems like the majority of the people I know have marriage on the brain. Whether they're getting married, getting engaged or just flirting with the idea, the topic has come up more times than I can count.

So now I'm going to inflict the topic on you guys. What do you think of marriage? Are you the marrying type? What advice would you give to someone considering marriage?

(Regarding the latter question, my advice usually takes the form of this Friedrich Nietzsche quote:

"When entering into a marriage one ought to ask oneself: do you believe you are going to enjoy talking with this woman up into your old age? Everything else in marriage is transitory, but most of the time you are together will be devoted to conversation.")
I really would like to have a family eventually but it depends on what God wants for me. I think that my advice for people would be the following: for Christians, make sure your marriage is centered around God. Also communication is so important. It is one of the key things in a marriage. I really would love to get married eventually. I think that there are a lot of things i need to work on before that. Maybe one day. : D

Admonish Misconstruction
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#56
Old 12-24-2007, 01:56 AM

Marriage? Well advice? Make sure you can stand each other, and you have lots of strength to make it through the first few years when theres lots of arguing and lots of disputes. Thats my main point.

Me getting married though? Eh.. Maybe someday. Haven't thought about it for awhile.

Moocat
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#57
Old 12-24-2007, 07:40 AM

You see, I'm a strange one.

I want to get married, and I want to have someone there.

But I know it won't happen. For one, I don't plan on living long enough to get married, and the other is the fact that no one would ever want to get close to me. I'm very...Messed up.

I mean, it seems like a lovely notion to get married, but I think it's only a fantasy of mine and 'tis all it'll ever be for me.

life in red and black
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#58
Old 12-25-2007, 05:01 AM


Marriage isn't that important, especially in this age where a women can prosper even if she's single.

My friends think it is weird I never care to have a boyfriend. I rather let love come to me, and if it doesn't, I know the statistics that there are more women than men where I live. Guess that's why. So whatever.

You are not old biddies yet. People still marry when they are 70 (saw that in the news once)


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#59
Old 12-25-2007, 05:11 AM

Im 16 years old. I like to flirt around with guy's but I am no where near marriage. I am not in deep love but there is this guy I like right now and for once it is something serious but like they say 'Highschool reltionship's never last.' But sometime's they do.

Nissa
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#60
Old 12-25-2007, 05:17 AM

I've been married twice. The first time I was afraid of dying old and alone (at the age of 19!) so I married the first guy who was interested. I chose very poorly and if I would have stopped to think I would have known that it wouldn't last long. I realized pretty quickly that there are far worse things then dying alone. So I divorced him and was determined to never marry again. Then I met the persistent bastard that is my husband. He taught me how men should be. It took him years but he never gave up. He showed me he loved me, not just telling me. A stranger can tell you they love you, but someone who really does will know how to show you. I'm so happy he's such a stubborn man lol. I suppose my big pile of advise is this:

Never ever get married for the wrong reasons. Marry only because you honestly love him and you have been with them long enough that real love has blossomed.

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#61
Old 12-25-2007, 05:32 AM

I never really thought about marriage before, not until I met my current boyfriend. It's a strange feeling. My advice to give to people who want to get married would be something like.. "Are you really willing to spend the rest of your life with this person? Do you truly, honestly think that your love for them is enough to cancel out everything else that will be coming at you?"

oHsoDemandinG
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#62
Old 12-27-2007, 01:33 AM

I always knew that someday I wanted to get married. But I'm not in a rush, because currently the person who I actually would marry needs to get himself together first. Anyway, marriage is a beautiful thing to me but sadly to say some people aren't made for it. People really have to think about what goes along with marriage... there's a lot of fine print and things in between the lines. Some people just skip over it but regret it when they do.

EbilKitty
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#63
Old 12-27-2007, 01:36 AM

I definitely don't believe in marriage, and it doesn't seem like anyone else from my generation does either. I don't know anyone who's married or even planning on it. In my opinion, it's so pointless. Relationships generally don't last that long anyway anymore, and with a 50% divorce rate why go through all the trouble of getting married.

Roni
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#64
Old 12-27-2007, 02:20 AM

I'll never get married. =) Some girls grow up dreaming of their wedding day. I grew up thinking, "I'll die an old maid before I get hitched!" I guess part of me is afraid of commitment, and part of me is afraid of having kids. Who would really want a child to grow up in this day and age? And then there's the entire kissing / making out / etc. thing. Bleh! D< Who knows what goes into your partner's mouth?

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#65
Old 12-27-2007, 03:01 AM

I've been thinking a lot lately, about what it would be like to be married. Mostly... just to have someone to come home to, talk to, do things with, spend time with. For me, it probably comes from loneliness issues. But also, I'm kind of tired of going from one relationship to the next, getting my heart broken. I just want to find someone I can stick with for the rest of my life, and have a family with. I don't know if I will... but the idea has danced around in my mind a lot in the past year or so... Especially since I started working and I'm talking all the time with people who are married. XD

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#66
Old 12-27-2007, 04:00 AM

I haven't really thought so much about marriage until this relationship I'm currently in.
We'll just be hitting 2 years together in March, but she's 16, and I'm 15.
When we talk about marriage and kids one day around a group of friends, they all say it's cute and whatnot and agree that we were "meant to be."
Then there are people who look down on us for thinking so optimistically.

There's nothing wrong with marrying a high school sweet heart. :P

Intoxicating Envy
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#67
Old 12-27-2007, 04:03 AM

Quote:
What do you think of marriage? Are you the marrying type? What advice would you give to someone considering marriage?
I hope when you were saying "guys" you were addressing
all of us...If not...well then here comes my girly
opinion.

What do I think of marriage. Well, I believe it
should be for those that can understand commitment
and deal with it. If you can't you really shouldn't
get married.

I am the marrying type, I am just searching for the
right person.

It is serious business, you shouldn't just go in it
to live with someone or put all your burdens on to
them. Marriage is the share of all your burdens,
therefore you must help him or her as they help you.

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#68
Old 12-27-2007, 05:25 AM

In the past I've always been so against marriage with my personal life. To hear of others getting married, I've always been happy for them, but for actual marriage myself I've always been either afraid or just... I didn't want any part of it.

But lately with my current boyfriend, I've been thinking a lot about marriage. About how maybe it won't be so bad and how I'd really like to get an engagement ring from him and show it off and live with him and just kinda settle down. Don't get me wrong, I want to travel and do things, not to mention being able to support myself and be stable and all that. But... it wouldn't hurt to be with someone while I"m doing that, right? At least, that's what I've been thinking about. You can probably tell I've been doing a lot of thinking about it, too, because I really have. I've been asking myself questions more than I can think about them, and I haven't really been able to come up with answers other than "yes, that would be nice", or "yes, I'd love to go through with all this". It does still scare me, but it's just looking more and more like something I'll want to do in the future... the future that's coming quickly and that I'm kinda just inviting with open arms. Just typing about it scares me but sounds nice at the same time. Dx

Anyways, yeah, I'll stop ranting. But it's definitely something I've been thinking a lot about lately. I've probably been thinking a lot more about it than I really should.

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#69
Old 12-27-2007, 02:19 PM

What do you think of marriage?

I think it's a lovely thing, so long as any and all 'marriage myths' are dispelled before the happy day. :3 Too many people believe everything's going to be hunky-dory once they're married (how many times have you heard someone say "But it'll get better after we're married"?), but any problems that exist between the two to be wed need resolving BEFORE marriage...except, of course, for the unresovable issues. There are some things ("He won't put his clothes in the hamper!" "She won't stop hogging the computer!") that just aren't worth fighting about. XD


Are you the marrying type?

In one word: NOOOOO. XDD I dislike the idea of pledging myself to some guy and then later finding out that my judgement in mates is horrible (as is my taste in everything else) and, since I don't believe in divorcing, I'd be stuck. Plus, I believe in the wife supporting her husband (and vice-versa, of course), but how do you support a dead-beat? I guess my grandmother's soon-to-be-ex kinda turned me off to the whole idea. @[email protected]

In addition to which, my dear hubby might not take too kindly to my dream of becoming an audiologist, and since I'll be in my mid-20s when I graduate with my Doctorate...I don't see it happening. If I were to ever have kids, I'd want them in my early 20s, with less risk of congenital defects and Down's Syndrome and such, and to have kids...I need to be married.

No, I'm not getting married. XDD

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#70
Old 12-27-2007, 03:23 PM

Personally, I am no where near to thinking about marriage. That's to far away in my life now. Right now, I am more into flirting and leaving the boyfriend thing out of my life. The only person I'd go out with is my best guy friend because I loved him forEVER (seven years, almost half my life).

If someone was getting married at my age, I would try to stop it because to early of a commitment (16/17 yrs.). If someone I knew was getting married, I would badger them asking if they're sure they're ready for this type of commitment.

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#71
Old 12-27-2007, 06:39 PM

I am considering marriage with my hubby, We are almost going on 4 loving years together, and I'm sure he's the one.
We are going to wait though until we build our house and are able to support a lovely marriage.

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#72
Old 12-28-2007, 05:27 PM

What do I think of marriage....i dont know, but what im sure about is im not going to get married so soon...let them say anything they want, but to me marriage isnt that important until ure really ready for it...

Am I the marrying type.. errr, i guess this would be a no? ;P

What advice would I give to someone considering marriage...make sure u really love him, dont marry because of something else ( money, family, forced to ) other than love...dont make urself regret it in the future D'=

 


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