random

the tape
it showed his injury
of my love
theglue held
was mine
but I did not apply
the proof
that the bandage would not work
she failed
as did I
to protect him
to shield him from grabby hands
from everyone else

I want to use him
th provethatI am capable
to everyone
but hsi injury
he will never be fulyl stable again
liek my love at home
two sides
created by the same maker
one is shielded
not broken
but put onto display
behind a glass case
one built
not shielded
broken
and for all to play with
they hurt
but they yearn for fixing
this fixing
i give them their bandage
my love to them
so their love
is proof
their torn edge
a wound to me
and my love for them
for they are
my love eternity

random

the keys to my heart
people hold them
not knowing
but they exist
but bigger
two three
one four
one five
proof that I can be myself
proof of my acknowledgment
proof I am capable
I need my proof
not the words
it is satisfying
it is something of a key
like the keys
two made by a possessor
one knows not
he isn't clueless
but what would happen
if I asked?
if I turned the key he owns
for him?
that is what the fourth wants
proof of his not understanding
understanding me strong
understanding a lot
but seeing only face value
and that is what he is
only face
laking the third tooth of the key
The one made by another
is given to who ever
he hands it freely to me
wanting the other side to be free
and giving him the key
for it is her that he sees in me
and it is her that will get the key
when it all ends
so she keeps it locked
he opens it and knows it
he possess it, and tried once, but lost his hopes when it did not work
and the third will need a guide
but knows not he owns it

random

I chase them all away
not meaning to
but it seems
that they want nothing to do with me
for them it is a simple yes no
for me
there is a grey spot
all covered the ground
where I can but not be in one
it is thee I live
watching as I stand in the no
wishing to step into the grey
touching it at times
but wishing was was black
tainted
proof that I am loved
but the puppy can't be a perfect partner with
it is this that I have fun
a dog is great
but not a man's best friend
nor a womans
but rather a loyal slave
to the love
the happy love
that is what it is
and into the white I stay
retreating
not wanting to initiate
but I wonder
when is the right time.

random

referring

I am not referring to you
i am referring to one I love
not you
never have been
I don't want to talk about you
but you do
it is stupid
your naive thoughts
it is proof you don't get it
when someone is talking about someone else
you can't see me in love
unless he goes out of his way
and is there
it is what has happened
all these years
you idolize me
you don;t see my flaws
You think i dream of you
I do not
I dream alone
alone with people you know not
and it is proof
when you thin I am referring to you
that I am not
that you think only of me
so get over it
and understand what I feel
so you can let go
ofthe string of hope you hold

random

if I could reverse time
I would not be happy
despite what people think
despite what people want to believe
time travel will still cause problems
I would have probably just moved my love
but alas
he is broken
I wish I could yell at roommate
but alas she hides
it is a cycle
inevitable because she likes to touch my stuff
so can I run
and yell at her
for love
the key to my heart
is still there
and repaired
just saddened because
he was broken
and can never be fully fixed
unlike a bandage
this one will leave a permanent scar.

random

I know not the reason why
The why one won’t work
It is better up there
But you made me move
So then why
Why is it
That I can’t find it now
It has been seconds
Long time
But I want it
Wanting my time
My connection
My portal
To the world beyond

random

I try again
Hope it will work
Hoping that the cold hasn’t killed it all
The cold
It blunders so
It cancels life
To all but us

it closes connections
portals
and makes me want to create my own
and live there instead
it is then that i want nothing to do
I want to be in my own world
away from life

random

weather

the cold weather
it is slush
and ice
and rain
it pools
making puddles
bigger than me
and bugs me
and then the ice came
it didn't freeze the puddles
but froke theground
then the sleet came
and made hte slush
cold slush
that keeps form
like a clear blanket
I step through
and worse than snow
for it is wet
already
and is not pretty
but still shows the puddles
and then the snow
it covers everything else
making it white
white as snow
but with the clear parts
it is not pure
but rather a brown mess
and proof of reason to not go outside
instead
it just sits here
wanting for me to walk out
so I can be attacked again
by yet another weather inhabitant
and to hurt me
and freeze me
so nothing else will happen
but tiredness and sleep
So I have no life
that is the weather of my depression

random

wishing you were here again
with nothing that was thee
and in my life
there still to come
and where we are

wishing you were somehow here again
and be with all these days
holding me tight
and rest for night
and being there for me

wish you are I here together
and nothing to be left undone
and forever now
be here
for the time again

(in melody to phantom of the opera song) thanks for the idea allucard

random

I wind up here again
writing what needs to be said
my poetry
my life
and all the issues that have happened
why must I wait
i understand that I am to wait
that they have lunch
but that is annoying
while do they all have lunch together
but oh well
there is issues
I feel like I am a person suing my roommate
for there is what I want
and what I deal with
but she runs
like the others
not fighting back
and I don't like talking to her in person
for this piece
is upstanding
and I want it all to end
and when I calm down
i wonder why Tom said what he did
it was weird
I must admit
but me sad
and angry
and emotions ride all
alchol is bad
especially in this enraged state
so I don't touch it
can it all die down
so I can return to normal
I have issues
let them disappear.

random

why, why must i never understand
why is she afraid
I want to understand
but they won't
we both bypassed the RA
so then now what
is she moving
or am I?
what will happen
when we all disappear
if all of a sudden
my world broke
and shattered
and all that was left
was the white space
after the confusion
I would calm
and wait for the my life to return
or someone to enter
for meditation is good
but it is necessary
to understand
with all is going
I must hold calmly
but can i?
Can I be alone?

random

if I room alone
then what will happen
will the depression get worse
or better
I don't want to deal with it
but I know
right now it will be better
I hate this drama
i hate it all
and with it all
I want to understand
I want to be there
Iwant to not be lonely
I wantto livehere
and be with someone
but I know what is happening
I know what can happen
when it all is gone
and what happens
when we never again
seem to walk
when i jsut
to see why to jump
it why do I live
or why do I die
it is to survive
to say years from now
I survive
i struggle
but survive
that we all understand
and that I learn

random

communication is key
you are ignoring that
you are avoiding me
and keeping yourself away
i understand why
but it is a case
you have to fess up
you have to understand what you did
and what happend
you can't keep quiet
and expect to not deal with this
we are to blows
without seeing each other
and that alone is an issue
but the piece
it can't ever be fully repaired
for it is now fragile
I fixed it the best I could
but I can't sell it now
so what will happen
when we see each other
both there
in the room
and we beat each other

random

the savior
the weak letting the strong survive
and why is it so pretty
but it is also the silly thing
for it is hard to see in real life
and so very little of this is really
there is no pretty lady
there are pretty guys
but they are taken
we love them all
but it is not worth being weak
I am loving
but powerful
so understand it

random

I feel like i inspire people
I feel in such a way
to love it all
it is funny
I got the keyblades made
but it is funny
there is fun parts
even with the fix
it is amazing
even though it is broken
it is loved
it is weighted weird
but it is nice
I love making things
I like being paid
my work equals pay
this is nice
and like the delivery service
if I can make a business
I can buy a but more
and save
for the future
so it is all good
now if I could go through everything else
and hand deliver
then I will be great
earning money with my addiction
is worth satisfaction beyond money

random

I want to be there
be in the world
the key to the world
it is great
and it is amazing
but it great
the idea of advanced civilization
is beyond me
flying is amazing
I love the hair here
I love it all
and I began to notice
that is why I love it all
and so I understand
the power is beyond amazing
but it is nice
and so I will keep it all here
in my mind
for safe keeping

random

symbolic meanings of whip
trainer
a beast trainer
or a human slave trainer
whips hurt
but won't kill
unless actually purposely doing so
a painful death
or slow injury
it leaves scars though
lots of them
and so it is even with a silver whip,
the werewolves shall still come
whips are odd
but weird
so it is the trainer
that is proof that it is easy
with training
to kill the trainer
they will die
if it is mind over pain
for death is slow
and not deadly

random

long standing issues

it has been 48 hours of hell
she avoids me
I do my business
she doesn't talk to me
doesn't say anything
it is a problem
I want to know
I want to
but the issue is there
what she broke belongs to me
and in that fact I can't let it go without punishment.
So this issue, it feels long standing. This was her room
but no longer
so then, what will happen
when it is resolved
will I trust again
for she broke mine

random

home

the home of the mountains
I wish I was there
the land of blue skies
of skiing
of packed snow
where the sun comes out
after the bad weather
there is no pelting rain
just cold
so it is there i want to go
a place far from here
I want to disappear to the house
and see again
my happiness
my pride
my joy
my love

random

art is weird
I love those who understand it
I want to go out with them
but does one understand talent? talent to think
talent to constantly love a project
to beat one for days
to see all that they can
to be at that road
and pick
for they are on a whim
but what in an artist without their talent
but a normal person
or a creative one?

random


one year
is all it takes
to finish books
to finish these
but it is the 50 goal
that is so easy
so i wonder
what happens then?
the satisfaction I could get
i am around readers
not creators
but in one year
I have made everything
seemed to
and to create what was not existent
was fun
a challenge yes
but fun
for the year

random

the tiredness engulfs me
keeps me still
the movement
constant
the movement
not noticed
others notice
but it keeps me awake
for a small bit
then drags the energy away
and makes me sleep.
so where to go
but to the bed
that i must move
for it is dead
and so then I can be around
around alone
to the death of myself
as I live.

random

items of wanting
the real and the virtual
kadaj blade
anime stuff not even here
keyblades
art clay silver
silly things
compensation for what was lost
a cloak
the wings
more wings
the pudao
and avi being purple, or kadaj like
these things
both real and virtual
and small
but amazing
have their uses
it is a case of that I don't need them
I just like them
like i like the keyblade
never need it
what is one suppose to do with something that big
but do what I did
and build it
for the sake of the build

random

sitting here
bored
bored is what i half the time am
when i am in my portal
earning gold
but it is an addiction
to here my life
to here my time through all the work
that shows it all
so I sit
in the basement
of the building
working
but not
as i do
normally
sitting here
earning gold
what is the max a user earns in a day
for I seem to get a lot
but not insanely
i wish I got a job
so i could earn more
and not have an issue like I was
like I am
saving

random

The guessing game
the guessing game is listing a few things around oneself, I feel like nothing changes, no matter what i am
it is sill, but it does happen
these items give me one nice feeling of home
like talking till 3 yesterday
that was great
tiring
but great
so it seems odd
when eyes go cross eyed.

a desk
a cell phone
a dragon sweatshirt
class
people
eye hurting monitor