G'morning, everyone. :)

Good morning/day to you too. ^^

What are you up to, Sadrain? :)

Nothing much. Earning gold, I guess. To get that awesome, awesome CI set. *drools over it*
And trying to get over my depression.

*parades around wearing a red and white stripped stockings, a rubber nose, giant converse (like clown shoes), a pock-a-dot rainbow dress honking a funny horn and doing somersalts* COME ON, SADRAIN! :D Smile for Clair Bear!
Be happy! ^^

THAT really made me smile. *throws confetti*
Aw, I really love you, Clair. *snugs*

:hug: I'm glad I was able to make you smile, Sadrain. ^^

^^ You have such gifts indeed. *snugglish*

I also like the orchid pin you added to your hat. ^^

:hug: Why, thank you.

Afternoon guildies! :)

Hey, Izumi.

I'm around again.
Sorry guys.
My last 1.5-2 weeks sucked, I had much to do, felt like shit and had no time for Mene.
Sorry, guys.

-HUGS SELLY-
I'm so sorry :(

*tackles Selly and sobs*
OH! Selly, you did come back!
I was worried you wouldn't come back. :hug:
Is there anything I can help you with?

Selly, I am here for you. :D

Nah, not much you can do.

On top of my own problems, one of my friends at school - not one of my BFF's, but a pretty good friend - got in even more problems last year than I did, but due to all kind of things we haven't had any deep conversations in quite some time, so neither of us was sure what had caused the other's troubles, and at a school with 1500 people you don't really talk about it with each other either. Don't want the whole school to know everything, after all.
Last week we finally managed to talk quite a while - I think an hour or something - about our problems instead of just the basic quick talks we have a couple of times every week.

It was extremely emotional. Because we both have much bad experiences, we tend to understand eachother better than most do. We talked. She helped me a lot, but she reminds me so much of that friend I have no more contact with - I told you about her, Clair, right? - especially during these conversations, and that is so fucking hard.
And I see that girl slowly getting into the same problems that other friend did.
She talked to me about what was the reason she was not much at school last year. While there were much problems for her already - her father is extremely ill, bad youth, etc. - last year got even harder.
She finally told me what was wrong - and I know that perhaps ten people, not many more know of it. She trusts me a lot, but it hurt me so much to hear what had happened.

She was raped on her way to school during last schoolyear.

Why the FUCK is it that such things happen to so many people I care so fucking much for? It hurts me to see how she struggles with it, and it hurts me to see how other people talk about her behind her back because most people do NOT know what happened, and so they only see that she skipped school extremely much, and that her behaviour has become pretty bad, that she rebels and so on.

:( Oh no! I hope everything goes okay for her and you.
I know how much your other friend means to you and meant to you.
I don't want to see you get hurt and I don't want to hear of another girl you care about getting harmed. :hug:

If there is anything Clair Bear can do, even though she's stuck in the States, she'll do what she can help Selly.

Just understand that I will sometimes disappear for half a week to two weeks sometimes.
Much is happening, and it is getting harder and harder to deal with.
I had hoped I had left these problems behind me.
She is the third person I care for that got raped or otherwise sexually assualted.
She is the fifth or sixth person I care for that I see going down into problems.
My sister is getting deeper and deeper into her own shit while my mother seems to be dealing with her own case of a slight depression, as is my father, while I have been dealing with this shit for years now.
My grandmother from my mother's side has Alzheimer and Parkinson, and my grandfather from the same side of the family is getting a burn-out because of the continual care for his wife.
One of the persons I care most for in the world I have not seen for years, another disappeared halfwalf last year and even before that I rarely managed to contact her.
I keep reminded of that girl I miss so much every time I get outside or sit inside. I do not know why - while I was always aware of the loss, and thought about her at least a few minutes every day, it is now that wherever I am, I look around me in the hope to see her. Even in locations I know she cannot be, like my own SCHOOL.
I think about her every time I step outside my door - every time I see someone that looks even in the slightest like her - every time I get remembered of my own problems, every time I see my friends, every time I see clothes or books from the time when we could still meet each other. Everytime I smoke a cigarette, or decline one/decide for myself not to smoke one. Every time I walk through the city in which my school is located. Every time I think of my old school, the school at which we both were. Every time I think about my depression, I think of her. Every time I see my sister and my friend falling deeper and deeper into problems, just out of my reach, I think of her.
And every time I think of her, I miss her, and I feel guilty even though I KNOW I did all I could do for her. Every time I am reminded of her for more than a few seconds, I get angry with this fucked up world. Every time I talk or write about her, I cry.

:hug: Poor, Selly. I wish there was something I could do to make all these problems go away for you. I can't stand this! I hate seeing how much pain you and those you love are in pain. She wants to make it all better. :(

I hope that everything works out for her, Sil. I'll pray for her.

I am sorry selly :(

:hugs:
The fact that I can rant to you is very important, Clair. You help me much by that. :)

@ Selly::
Well, I'm so glad that it can help you.
I worry about you so much.
I don't want you to be in so much pain. :(//

How are other things?
Questing for anything? ^^

Hello everyone, what's up?

Nice avi, Hime. :hug: