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KaiCalan
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#1
Old 11-27-2009, 02:10 AM

This is an excerpt from my first novel ever, entitled, Here, Queer, and in Need of Beer It is the first part of the foreword. Please read, and let me know if I should really attempt to get this idea published, or if the world just isn't ready for it. Thanks, and happy reading!

My name is Kevin Jennes. I am fifty-four years old. I work as a freelance photographer. Most of my gigs are for senior pictures for high schools. I get a lot of business because I do it for much less than the pretentious company photographers that the schools hire. I have two sons. Stian is sixteen years old, and he is definitely an artist. He has already had drawings shown at various high-end art galleries throughout the state. He wants to work for a children's cartoon channel when he graduates from high school, though I keep telling him he should wait until after college. Jakob, my older boy, is nineteen years old. He is currently attending the local community college, and working on getting his Associate's of Arts degree in Humanitarian Studies. He made Dean's List his first semester. Looking in on my life, I seem like a nice, average, All-American guy. And, for the most part, I am.
I am also a queer.
Yes, I am not afraid to publicly admit that I am with a woman. I have spent the last twenty-two years of my life with my beautiful partner, MacKenna. I love her with everything I have. She is the mother of my children. Fortunately, we have made our life work, but it has not been without its difficulties throughout the years. MacKenna and I grew up in quite a different time, after all. We came of age in a time when even saying the word “queer” could get you beat half to death, or thrown in jail, or worse.

Grammar Nazii
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#2
Old 11-27-2009, 03:48 PM

It intrigues me to read more. I was actually disappointed that it ended just there ):
I really do like it, and applaud you for writing such a story!
EDIT: Yeah, okay, crappy critique. Um, let me start over xD
I think your rhythm, for such a small excerpt is good, and it isn't too fast paced. You've explained what has happened well so far, and I like it.
It flows gently and makes sense.
I congratulate you!
Have you sent it to a publisher yet?

Last edited by Grammar Nazii; 11-27-2009 at 03:51 PM..

 



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