I'm extremely tired of people who pretend to be my friend, while I help them with their problems, but then treat me like crap the rest of the time. I've met so many people like this it's not even funny anymore. It makes me sick.

I'm also tired of people saying they're my friends and then disappearing on me. It's not right, it's not fair, it's not funny.

Has this happened to anyone else here?

That sounds a lot like the people I used to surround myself with. It made me sick and tired too. They'd only talk to me when they needed something or had to vent their problems (but had no interest in mine), they'd say they were my friend but they'd do things with groups of people but not invite me. I don't talk to them anymore and since I've started college I've made a few real friends that I wish I had met sooner.

Sure has. I have a lot of problems making friends, even though people tell me I'm very likeable and funny. Therefore I never had many friends. So when I was growing up, in the most important phase of anyone's life (puberty, teenagehood and whatnot), I sort of lost a friend and made a new one. I'll get back to that "sort of" later.

This new friend of mine... She was odd. She'd refuse to talk about anything personal, but if I refused to talk about personal things myself, she'd get frustrated and bitter, so I'd end up sharing everything. This, I did not understand at the time, is extremely wrong in any relationship. She would always avoid confrontation, would not share anything of her life that could be considered important (she has a disease she never told me about, I found out just a few years ago), and would resent my connections with people she didn't consider her friends (which constituted most of my class at the time).

A few years ago I realized that this was no friendship whatsoever, and ended up parting ways after she used my best guy friend until he had his heart broken, and then accused me of having sex with him (lawlwat). But what I say now is that if this happened, she couldn't even be considered my friend at all, not even when I thought she was, all those years ago.

That sort of that I talked about was pure peer pressure. My oldest friendship had a bump that lasted for years, merely because she left me and hurt my feelings deeply just so she could hang out with the cool kids from our class. Nevertheless, we ended up bonding after we left that school, and then parted ways again when she started dating a boy who treated her wrong and I called her out on it. Now that she broke up with him, after a year of us not talking, I'm trying again to restore whatever I can. I'm pretty sure the damage we've done can be repaired, but one never knows. I guess it's a matter of people, whether they are worth it or not, really... As much as I disagree with online relationships, when it comes to friends, thank god I met a wonderful guy who I hope will remain my friend for years to come.

I'm sorry someone treated you that way. If someone is really your friend they won't abandon you for any reason. I've never abandoned one of my friends, and I never will. I've been dropped by people who had sworn never to, and I don't really know how to deal with it completely. I forgive them and all. They had their reasons whatever they were, and I'll not judge them for it. I just don't understand how someone could do that. It's beyond me.

Hell if any of them wanted to start talking to me again I would. I even have recently with a few who I thought were lost forever to me. :) They are now really good friends.

Maybe your friend will wise up and come back like some of mine did. :)

Not to sound rude or anything, but I don't want her "friendship". All she did was mooch off me and use me to get asspats. There are a few things I never forgive, and she did them all, thus proving that I'm so much better without her in my life.

I am glad that you had friends get back to you. It's ok to not understand such things, I mean, friends are supposed to be there through thick and thin, so when a friend leaves, it hurts. But I'm glad you have that mindset, forgiveness is a wonderful trait. (:

I meant the last girl. The one who you are trying to patch things up with.

And I try to be forgiving. I've recently had even more crap happen which made me really not want to with certain people, but... I'll get over it eventually.

Sounds like all my friends, bar one. I don't hear from them until it's one of their birthdays or Christmas. Essentially when it's time for me to buy them something. I've deleted my facebook so many times because seeing them arranging to go out without me upset me.

One of them used to be like my best friend in school. But now she won't go anywhere without this other girl from college. The one time we did go out without inviting the other girl she kept saying how guilty she felt for not inviting her and I had to go watch the film a second time with the other girl and pretend I hadn't already seen it. But she has no issues telling me all about what she's done with the other girl without me. I mean things I don't like fair enough but things they know I'd like they do and then tell me how good it was.

I'm sorry. See I have limited myself at to the number of people I let in anymore you know? There are friends, good friends, and my two or three best friends. If I don't hang with them at least once a month they're just friends. Once a week minimum for my best friends.

I don't really count them as friends any more. I'll talk to them when they remember I exist go out when they invite me but they're not really friends. I have one friend, I met at uni and as far as I'm concerned she's worth more than the 2 of them put together. I feel more comfortable with her, y'know like I know her better even though I've only known her the last 6 years and them more like 10/12 years. I guess I'm lucky, if she'd started uni the year she was meant to instead of the year after I more than likely wouldn't have met her. I mean she's got to be the closest thing to a best friend I've ever had, lived with her for 3 years and she still wants to know me. :XD Not seen her much recently though, need to move back over there I think.

I think if one loses a friend, or more than one within the teenage years, then the concept of "best friends" becomes a bit... Blurred and grey. I know I also don't claim to have "best friends" anymore because my friendships became so shaky in the last few years, ever since we all started college. Distance, you know. Hurt all of our relationships.

This kept happening to me a lot and these days I look around and think that some of the people around me aren't as real as they pretend to be. And you're completely right, the fact of the matter is, this isn't right and it isn't fair. I am one of those people who will drop everything to be there for a friend in need, I will listen to them when they need to be heard, help them however I can and do whatever else it is in my power I can that they need. But most times I find that when I need someone to be there, they aren't. And it hurts to think that I can do so much for these people and they can't even so much as comfort me in return. And on my down days when I need a day to myself instead of helping them, I have been freaked on because I wasn't in the mood to be around a crowd of people. In the end though I do realize that even though not many in number I have a few real friends that are amazing people.

Yeah it was uni that really ended the school and college friendships. I guess 20 minutes away was too far.

I go to school and church with one of my friends. Another few are ex girlfriends, one of whom I've been talking to all day. Oddly enough they tend to go all mama bear when I get dumped. lol.