Right... so my friend felt sorry for me for not going out(dating) with anyone.... so now she is trying to set me up with her friend. She took a picture of me when I wasn't looking then sent it her... Then tolled me to add her on Facebook (as you do).

now I need some opening lines to start a conversation XD

Help would be appreciated
tanks
Demondog5

another note :-

What have your friends done for you?

My first thought is... "Well this is awkward" and my second is... "I like cats, do you like cats?" However, neither of these possibilities would make much headway, methinks. And this, sir, is why I'm single.

o.o Well. First, I'd apologize for your friend's actions. Because it is pretty awkward to have that happen to you. Then you could respectfully express interest in getting to know her better if she wants.

... I guess? /courteous route.

What have friends done for me? Hmmm... so many things! Things that friends should do, you know? It's been a few years since I was in school, but in my adult life I've had a friend come to my house and cook dinner for me and clean when I first came home from the hospital with a new baby. Before the baby and pregnancy I had a friend carry me home from a party. Lol he was sweet, and I was a liitttllee drunk. :sweat: I've got the good kinds of friends. :P I can't think of anything else at the moment. My daughter is watching Disney and I can barely think. -.-

I'd be more annoyed at the friend for doing this then be mad at the person that they were trying to set me up with. Can't really come up with any opening lines for a situation like this, maybe ask if the friend in question was trying to do the same to the other person. Make a joke out of it, maybe?

I don't have any actual friends, because I think they're annoying.
So generally I'd be happy if people minded their business.
x3

Originally Posted by Carzeebear

My first thought is... "Well this is awkward" and my second is... "I like cats, do you like cats?" However, neither of these possibilities would make much headway, methinks. And this, sir, is why I'm single.

This reminds me of me so much. XD I seriously do start talking about fish or cats and people just kind of look at me weird. Yeah, that is why I am single as well. :P

Did you look at her page? Look at her favorite music and movies and maybe even comment on a silly picture. Don't feel too awkward about it, even though I bet it's scary. She's probably scared to start anything either, you never know. Haha.

My friends have tried to set me up with people too (half the time I was already with someone and they knew full well I was with someone). I always just said something small and simple about them. Like "so you went to so-and-so concert last weekend? You have brothers? Our friend sure is weird." Simple stuff.

"Hey, you're friends with [mutual friend]. She's a great friend, isn't she? How'd you guys meet?"

*shrug*

As much as I'm sure I'd get tons of gold for listing their deeds, I don't feel like going into it. I will say that you are officially initiated into my circle of friends if you help me clean my room. It's been a tradition since elementary school. I'm well into college-age now.

If it were me, I'd apologize for the awkwardness and then chat with them like it was anybody else. If it turns out that we have common interests, awesome! Another friend and perhaps girlfriend (in your case).

But what do I know. XD I think I tend to give guys the wrong impression because I'm really friendly to everyone... :sweat:

@Ferra: Omg, I'm the same way. I've had guys literally fall in love with me just because I was nice to them. *sighs* Unfortunately it's made me a colder person towards men because I got so darned sick of fending off love struck puppies. For me it's just like, "My saying hi to you does not mean I'm an an angel or that I want to date you."

@ElysiumFate: My problem is that it rarely seems to happy with guys where the feeling is mutual. :sweat: I still like handing out with guys, but I do think I purposefully keep some of my male friends at a distance just in case. It's been awhile since I've had a close guy friend.

try starting with what you know you share like the friend that set you up, share stories then go from there. it should give you a different subject to change to. it works for me when i get set up.

@Ferra: Yes, definitely. A lot of the time I'll know that a guy friend has a crush on me, I'll go through my crush phase on him, and make it pretty clear I like him, but then he never asks me out until we're already into the friend stage, and then it's just awkward. >.>

The opposite sex can just be so hard to be friends with. I've yet to have a...wait, nope, I had one guy friend who never went through the crush stage on me, but he was so much older than me that it wouldn't have happened anyway.

@ElysiumFate: Ha, yeah... That happened with several of my high school guy friends too. I did have a bit of a crush on them at first, but then I convinced myself that it wasn't worth pursuing and thought of them only as friends. A few suddenly realized "Hey, you're a girl!" and tried to ask me out, but by then I'd already moved on. I was happy to be friends with them, but I knew enough about them to know that I'd be unhappy in a relationship with them.

I have several guy friends now, but it's hard to tell how they view me. There's definitely someone who I want to like me. :lol: I wish dating wasn't so complicated.

Uh huh. At that point you know all of their baggage but don't have an emotional investment, so it's too late. I don't think any of us would get into relationships if we knew the other person's baggage beforehand.

Yeah. I'm definitely fonder of my guy friends than my girl friends. They're just more honest, and for whatever reason I get more respect from them. I pretty much keep them in the friend zone because of that even though I like one.

Yeah, that's true. XD I guess it's nice that I was spared from getting stuck with their baggage, but I do worry that I'm too picky sometimes.

Lately I find it easier to make and maintain friendships with girls, since where I live now you don't really ever hangout one-on-one with a guy unless you're dating. However, usually I spend time with friend groups that are a mix of guys and girls.

I understand. I'm picky as heck, too, and I know it. Awhile back I had to make a list of what I wanted, and narrow it done to about ten things that were really important to me. It's a bit easier to find prospective boyfriends now.

For sure. I'm pretty careful about not going to a lot of places one on one with guys since it is expected where I live that you don't do that unless you're dating (I'm in a college town). I do know for sure that a lot of people at my college think I'm dating my best guy friend, but oh well. My female friends have been kinda back-stabby the last few years, so I'm working on getting some new ones of those.

I would just roll with it as if I set the date up myself. Who knows what could happen?

My friends don't usually do things like that. I've never had a friend set me up with someone.

@ElysiumFate: Well for me, there's not any specific thing or collection of things that I'm looking for. Lately I've had trouble since the dating rules in Japan are different than what I'm used to. Guys rarely ask you out even if they like you, but at the same time, if you push too hard for a relationship, it can intimidate some guys. XD It's a delicate balance, further complicated by my so-so language abilities and my very obvious foreign appearance. :lol:

So I guess when I say I'm "picky", it's because most of the guys who've asked me out since I moved here were over 10 years older than me, or wanted sex but no relationship, or were enamored with my foreign-ness and couldn't treat me like a regular human being. =/ Not to say there haven't been decent guys too, but so far nothing has worked out.

Aww, back-stabby friends are the worst. Definitely not worth holding onto. I wish you luck in making new friends! :)

Well first I would take Dystopia's advice and apologize for your friend's actions.

After that, I don't know. Try to start a friendship. To me, personally, I don't like when a guy/girl/whatever approaches me with the intent of dating. I'm sorry but you don't know me well enough to know you want to date me. I like to know a person first before going to that level, be it via simple chatting or hanging out. But then again, I believe in friends first.

So my advice would be, if you want to start a conversation just do like you normally would with anyone else.

@Ferra: Ohhhh. That makes sense. I've just seen you were from Japan in other threads, but never talked to you, so I completely forgot. I can sympathize with that to an extent, though. The guy I've had a "crush" on for the last several months is Chinese. There's something hard about that line to cross, and he's weird in that he's a shy extrovert.

But I wouldn't call you picky, then. :)

Thanks, the luck is welcomed. :yes:

I think I mention Japan too much. XD;

I'm from the US, actually, but I've been living in Japan for almost 2 years now. :) Hmm... I think I know a several people that I could call "shy extroverts". One guy got super tipsy the night we met and decided to confess his love for me, and I might be interested if it wasn't for the fact that ever time we try to talk since then, he can never hold a proper conversation. He's outgoing in that he'll clown around and he tries to approach me sometimes, but he's too shy to really say anything to me. :lol: But ah well, he's fun to tease at least.

Nobody can blame you! It's awesome that you're actually living there. I have known so many people who want to live in Japan, but never tried, or ever will. So the fact that you did is something to talk about. :D

Haha, yes, it's fun to tease those kinds of people. My friend will talk to anybody and everybody. He would talk to a trash can if it weren't an inanimate object. He'll make friends with anything that moves, and he's super fun to be around, but if you try to get close to him and make him open up about his life or lean on you, or become really emotionally close, he clams up pretty good. Kinda a blusher, too, if you tell him you think he's cute or flirt with him. =3 :ninja:

Well I feel like I have to mention it sometimes since otherwise the comments I make might be hard to follow since most people use their own culture as a frame of reference. I wish more people would come try to live in Japan for a while. :) If everyone got a chance to experience living in a different culture then we'd all probably be a bit more understanding. (Assuming people are willing to try doing things differently when they get there - I know some people who get upset and frustrated when they have to abide by a different culture's customs. :sweat:)

Aww, that sounds really cute! I can't say I'm good friends with this guy since we've still barely talked, but he does seem very willing and able to chat with people. It seems like I'm the only one he has a problem with.