Originally Posted by Codette

^agreed Bucket. I live in Canada, so the only excuse for tans are being at the lake all summer, or going away. Fake tans are gross.

Not completely true....I'm starting to get a tan(though most of it is "kitchen tan" since I work in a hot kitchen), and I don't even spend a lot of time outdoors.


As for deal breakers, a girl that smokes, drinks excessively, does drugs(pot included), is a cheater, and as Elysium said, cuddles with her guy friends. Oh, and if they try to change who I am, and what I do...they get shown the door.

Something that I also tend to stay away from, is a girl with kids. Sure, I would love to have kids later on, but right now I don't feel I'm ready to be a father figure, even to kids that aren't mine. I'm fine looking after some kids for a night while the parents are out, but other than that....no deal.

Hygiene, and the amount of make-up that a girl wears, are also important. If she doesn't bathe regularly, and uses too much perfume(as in I can only smell that when I am cooking something with LOTS of garlic right under my nose....and no garlic smell) then deals off. If she plasters on make-up, or can't even leave the house all "dolled" up, then I tend to get the whole "She is WAY too high maintenance for me" vibe.

I know there is more, but I need to head to work, may post more a little later(like tomorrow).

Gotta say, all the hate that smokers are getting in this thread is slightly saddening. :c I'm a social smoker.

I'm gonna add to the smoking hate then, sorry :ninja: It really is gross for a non-smoker though. People who smoke seriously do not realise how everything they posess smells like an old ash tray, yuk.

Hygiene is right up there for me, too. One whiff of armpit and I'm outta there!

I have so many deal breakers. I am pickey and know what I want in a relationship. Smoking is icky. If they don't like animals. They have to be brave one of my first dates is bridge jumping depending on the weather but if they are lame and don't jump it's a no go. They have to enjoy going out I have a pretty big social life and I enjoy doing new things. They have to have a job and not live at home with mommy and they also have to have a vehicle. They can't have kids or be with anyone else...no baggage for this girl. They have to be adventurous and respect people and their belongings in general. They have to let me have my space when I want it without asking me a hundred annoying questions such as who you with or were are you? There are more but that's all I can think of now.

Originally Posted by Bucket

Gotta say, all the hate that smokers are getting in this thread is slightly saddening. :c I'm a social smoker.

Originally Posted by jellysundae

I'm gonna add to the smoking hate then, sorry :ninja: It really is gross for a non-smoker though. People who smoke seriously do not realise how everything they posess smells like an old ash tray, yuk.

What jelly said is part of the reason smoking is a deal breaker for me. Also, having grown up with a manic depressive smoking mother, and having lost two family members to lung cancer (one where smoking was the direct cause) I can't say I can defend smoking. :XP

But part of it might be that a lot of the people replying are from the U.S., and smoking is, like, one law away from being completely banned here.

Originally Posted by ElysiumFate

One of my more...interesting...deal breakers, is that it would have to be a cold day in hell for me to date someone who is either a) allergic to cats, or b) doesn't like them (at least to the point they'd tell me I couldn't have one or make me feel bad for having one). I love my pet cat and I don't ever want to live without one.

Thankfully as a guy, this hasn't been an issue. Kitties FTW

Originally Posted by ElysiumFate

Also, being asked if I'm a virgin. Had that one a couple of times and it's creepier than f#$@.

Honestly, I'd prefer to know if a girl is a Virgin before I pursue her; though it's not really a question I've ever asked since the answer tends to be obvious. Virgins are by far my biggest deal breaker. I would definitely think twice about a girl with only one previous sexual partner even.

Other deal breakers for a long term relationship include:

Bad skin

Disapproval of my work

Dependence (on so many levels)

Kids (not mine)

@Inso: I have a horrible track record of finding every single person in the entire universe who is allergic to cats. Dunno why. :lol: It's nice to hear someone isn't. XD

Honestly, I'd prefer to know if a girl is a Virgin before I pursue her; though it's not really a question I've ever asked since the answer tends to be obvious. Virgins are by far my biggest deal breaker. I would definitely think twice about a girl with only one previous sexual partner even.

That definitely goes both ways. I've met people who are adamant about both options in that spectrum--I just don't care either way at this point. Though, anybody who's getting into the double digits on partners disturbs me.

Originally Posted by ElysiumFate

That definitely goes both ways. I've met people who are adamant about both options in that spectrum--I just don't care either way at this point. Though, anybody who's getting into the double digits on partners disturbs me.

ElysiumFate: It's definitely both ways. I've seen some pretty messed up situations as a result of a girl taking a guys virginity, and the guy not knowing how to deal with it when she leaves.

I know a lot amount of guys who want the "innocent" girl, mostly as the result of some insecurity over their own sexuality; but I'll take a girl who has gone a few rounds any day.

You know, the bulk of men who are allergic to cats, will get over it if they are forced to live around one for a while. Try waiving some kitty in their face daily :lol:

Originally Posted by Insomniac

ElysiumFate: It's definitely both ways. I've seen some pretty messed up situations as a result of a girl taking a guys virginity, and the guy not knowing how to deal with it when she leaves.

Insomniac: I've seen that as well. The worst thing I've ever seen, though, are the people (mainly girls unfortunately) who wait for their prince charming until they're 23, then give everything to the first "perfect" guy they meet and end up messed up when they leave.

I know a lot amount of guys who want the "innocent" girl, mostly as the result of some insecurity over their own sexuality; but I'll take a girl who has gone a few rounds any day.

I've always judged guys who want the virgin bride to be insecure, unfortunately.

You know, the bulk of men who are allergic to cats, will get over it if they are forced to live around one for a while. Try waiving some kitty in their face daily :lol:

Haha, sound advice. With my luck I'll end up using it!

My biggest deal breaker....

Music taste.

If I can't stand his favorite band, okthxbaidontcomeback. >.>

Originally Posted by Bucket

Gotta say, all the hate that smokers are getting in this thread is slightly saddening. :c I'm a social smoker.

To be fair, I have tried being in relationships with girls that smoke...and there are some reasons I CAN'T stand it:

1. Every piece of clothing that ANY girl Ive tried dating that smokes owns, smells like an ash tray.

2. Even with chewing gum/mouthwash, I can still taste cigarette when kissing...and that is NOT something I enjoy the taste of....

3. A lot of girls that Ive known who only socially smoke, tend to use EXCESSIVE amounts of perfume to cover up the smell...and by cover up...I mean I'm halfway across the room and I TASTE the perfume its that strong.

Originally Posted by ElysiumFate

One of my more...interesting...deal breakers, is that it would have to be a cold day in hell for me to date someone who is either a) allergic to cats, or b) doesn't like them (at least to the point they'd tell me I couldn't have one or make me feel bad for having one). I love my pet cat and I don't ever want to live without one.

I love cats....especially with ketchup. :P j/k

I do honestly love them, even though I'm slightly allergic to them(and I live with two cats right now), as long as they aren't super clingy towards one person, and when that person isn't around, they whine and complain like someone is pulling on their tail really hard.

Originally Posted by Draciolus

3. A lot of girls that Ive known who only socially smoke, tend to use EXCESSIVE amounts of perfume to cover up the smell...and by cover up...I mean I'm halfway across the room and I TASTE the perfume its that strong.

I was going to say I've never met someone who did that, and then I remembered my friend. o.< :lol: She developed some sort of invincibility complex after high school and started smoking these fancy cherry flavored cigarettes. She'd disappear out of the house, or the car, and then come back in and douse herself with a shitton of perfume. Ahh, man. She was nuts back then...still is..but moving on! XD

I love cats....especially with ketchup. :P j/k

I do honestly love them, even though I'm slightly allergic to them(and I live with two cats right now), as long as they aren't super clingy towards one person, and when that person isn't around, they whine and complain like someone is pulling on their tail really hard.

I find cat tastes best glazed in a Chinese orange sauce. ;)

True, but any animal can be irritating if they're like that. The most annoying animal I've ever seen, though, was a cat. The SECOND it saw a human it would start to continuously meow, and did not cease until it was sure it was alone. That cat was mental.

My kitty is a sweetheart, though. She's very tame and just makes sure that everyone in the household feels loved by her every day. ^.^

Ah, I just thought of a deal breaker... After reading miss bravery's post it reminds me that if you are ashamed or extremely embarrassed to be with me in public (because I will do stupid dances and sing extremely badly) then you're knocked out of the park immediately. I like people who will do the stupid stuff with me because that's what makes me and others smile. It's funny to see someone try to dance when they can't, and if they're singing badly to a funny song it's even better.

I'm growing up with a smoker, alcoholic, manic depressive, schizophrenic mum so I understand where you're coming from Elysium. ;c

I've tried smoking a few times, it was a social thing. However I'm completely turned off of it due to the disgusting taste of smoker's mouth. Especially since it was in my own. D: It's gross, and cigs give me a headache anyways. :/ I'd prefer someone to do pot than drink, though. They just get reallly loopy or calmer and more grounded.

Of course, I'm not a big fan of the smell of pot either, it's too strong for my tastes. I have a weak stomach when it comes to smells oddly.

Another is, no matter how lame this may sound is, if you can't stand anime/manga then I'll highly be ignoring you. My personality is very anime based, I do all the "kawaii" stuff you see most anime girls do. As a tween I often mimiced to the point that it's natural and I don't mean to do it.

Oh and younger guys, if you're younger than me I am not going to date you. I've had way too many bad experiences with that.

I can sort of understand the virginity thing but that really is a depending on the situation thing. I prefer people to not be virgins myself. However it's not an absolute deal breaker for me.

For me the first big thing would be trying to force me to change who I am. If you don't like who I am then we shouldn't be dating in the first place. If I do something you don't enjoy (say someone that doesn't like anime) it isn't a deal breaker. I will just watch it when we aren't together. But, don't try to make me stop watching it.

Second would be not being honest. I would rather have a rough truth than a nice lie anytime

Third: Drama! I understand sometimes a person has to vent about something bad that happened and I am there for that. But, everyday isn't bad even for the people with the worst of luck.

Coming from an experience with my family, I also absolutely cannot stand people who bitch about something that happened 20 years ago every day like it's new news. My mom does that, and I swear I'd f'ing divorce a person who did that to me. I do not give one half of a rat's ass that your boss screwed you over when you were 20. You are now 50 and have a good job. Shut up and move on.

In that same light, doomsayers bug me. If everything is death and destruction to you, then you can go live in that death and destruction because my world of rainbows is dumping your ass. :talk2hand:

Originally Posted by ElysiumFate

Coming from an experience with my family, I also absolutely cannot stand people who bitch about something that happened 20 years ago every day like it's new news. My mom does that, and I swear I'd f'ing divorce a person who did that to me. I do not give one half of a rat's ass that your boss screwed you over when you were 20. You are now 50 and have a good job. Shut up and move on.

In that same light, doomsayers bug me. If everything is death and destruction to you, then you can go live in that death and destruction because my world of rainbows is dumping your ass. :talk2hand:

That reminds me of one of the guys I work with...unless he had his suicide-stick-fix, then he CONSTANTLY is pissed about nothing at all.



One thing that I was reminded of today, while at the theaters, is girls that are literally skin and bones. Now, don't get me wrong, they are beautiful in their own way. Just not in a way for me to date, or even do anything other than talk to them. I just feel like I might snap them in half giving them a hug!

One of the huge huge HUGE dealbreakers for me when I was dating was STD's. I was not even okay with people who had cold sores (yes, oral herpes and genital herpes are THE SAME VIRUS kthx). I understand a lot of people get herpes from their parents, so in that vein "it's not really an STD" or whatever, but that doesn't mean that I'm okay with it because I don't fucking want herpes.

Maybe that makes me a terrible person, but I'm married now so it's irrelevant I guess.

Keyori: I don't think that makes you a bad person at all.

Curable STDs would be a different story, but things like herpes? No thank you. I'd also want to know why they got it even if it is a curable STD. Was it bad luck, or were they asking for it, if you catch my drift?

Draciolus: And that is the other reason I don't date smokers.

Hmmm... Deal-breakers...? If I had any deal breakers, I'd say intelligence is one. I'm not the most intellectual person, and I don't have the widest vocabulary, mainly because I enjoy simplicity and communication. However, I am pretty smart and I enjoy having an intelligent conversation with someone (or at least the ability to). I grew up with witty comments about tons of things and I enjoy hearing it.

Another deal breaker would probably have to be their ability to act like a kid/act their age. I like to say that "adulthood is knowing when and how to be a kid," so if I'm around someone who doesn't know how to act like a kid and have fun/someone who doesn't know how to be mature, that'd definitely be a deal breaker.

I agree on the smoking thing, too. I'm asthmatic, so I'd never be able to enjoy a friendship with a smoker if they smoke enough to where I can tell.

My biggest deal-breaker is CLINGINESS. Clingy, whipped, needy guys will send me running the other way. It's not possible to be in a healthy relationship with someone who won't let you respect him, let alone the fact that I find it annoying as heck to be smothered and obsessed over.

Also, people who try to pick me up or show up for a date while drunk or high aren't gonna get anywhere. Unless it's an appropriate setting and I am also drunk.

Originally Posted by Balsac

My biggest deal breaker....

Music taste.

If I can't stand his favorite band, okthxbaidontcomeback. >.>

^And this.

Spitting comes to mind.

Originally Posted by ElysiumFate

Keyori: I don't think that makes you a bad person at all.

Curable STDs would be a different story, but things like herpes? No thank you. I'd also want to know why they got it even if it is a curable STD. Was it bad luck, or were they asking for it, if you catch my drift?

Yeah, I agree. I hadn't considered something curable. I mean, I get UTI's and those are (in my case) 100% caused by me having sex, so I could let something that's basically not contagious to me slide. The big thing, I guess, is whether or not I can catch it.

Hm, well one for me (although it may be a bit shallow) is I could not date a guy shorter than me...especially since I'm pretty short to begin with.
But I could also never date a guy that puts more into his appearance then I do, someone who is really rude or has a big ego, and I definitely could not date a guy who is just depressed all the time.
No Debbie downers, thank you.

While I agree with people in the thread that I'm not the biggest fan of smoking, I've dated guys that did and it really doesn't bother me all that much.
Kind of just one of those things like "don't blow your smoke in my face and we'll all be cool," haha.